posted October 26, 2022 02:47 PM            

Hello everyone! I've studied my chart extensively and feel like I'm at a loss. My Moon is squared by Uranus, Neptune, and Mercury. I can say I feel the burn of Uranus and Neptune badly. Almost like there's two different me-s. I feel like I'm at my best when I work, move, think, and communicate. But then the fear kicks in and everything flies out the window. My ideas seem ludicrous and I want to retreat back into my shell, essentially longing to be coddled and not disturbed in any way. Just lost in my own world.

I don't know if it's the iffy moon or Canc/Cap SN/NN but I feel lunar themes have always followed me. Since I was a child, I've felt a connection to water. I could spend hours just playing in waves or fooling around in the pool. The pull was so strong that I went into the sea even if it was freezing cold.

Water also made its appearance in my dreams. Whenever I was feeling down, I dreamt of sinking into murky waters and putting up no resistance. There were also a lot of dreams about trying to get into clear and blue water but the dream always ended before I reached the water. In the past few years, I've finally reached the water a couple of times but have not felt any joy from it.

And finally, the full moon makes me feel ill. Even if I'm feeling well mentally, there's something so alien about the full moon, it makes me feel uneasy just looking at it. I also have vivid nightmares leading up to the full moon.