|
Author
|
Topic: I can't get rid of him, I'm afraid for my life.
|
Reincarnated Rainbow
Knowflake Posts: 47
From:
Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted October 08, 2011 03:34 PM
  
For the past three years I've been friends with this boy named Ian. He absolutely disgusts me. He thinks his life sucks, but is never able to give me a reason why it does, he is constantly putting himself down, he's always saying he has no reason to live, but never kills himself, and he tries to get girls to like him by claiming he cuts himself. (He wears t-shirts, there are no scars or scrapes.)And he stalks me-banging on my door, shouting my name through my window, and calling me 24/7 on my cell. Once he spent almost a whole day (taking an hour break every now and then) trying to get me to unlock my doors. I was so scared, I called my aunt when Ian was taking a break to come over my house and comfort me. He's always flirting with me, which was just fine at first, until he started trying to get in my pants AND other girls' pants at the same time. He's overly possessive of me. When he found out I liked a guy he threatened my crush to stay away from me. I am able to ignore him for a couple days, but then like some kind of voodoo magic I'm seeking him out and talking to him. I don't think when I'm doing it, I just literally walk to him like I'm in a trance. I'm not attracted to him, just looking at his face makes me feel dirty, but I can't stay away. I'm so scared that one day he'll come to my house with a gun, because his dad is a shooting coach and his mom is a cop. He has a whole room in his house full of guns and knives and swords. Why do I automatically go to him? I hate it. I hate it when we talk, and I hate it when he touches me, and I hate him. Please, someone help me.
IP: Logged |
Emeraldopal
Knowflake Posts: 1242
From: U
Registered: Apr 2011
|
posted October 09, 2011 03:30 AM
Reincarnated Rainbow,
Are you sure you want someone
to look into this?I feel you already know what to do
about this! ------------------
All my love, with all my Heart
lotusheartone IP: Logged |
Cancer/Scorpio729
Moderator Posts: 1377
From: 6,000 feet above sea level
Registered: Feb 2010
|
posted October 09, 2011 06:20 PM
You need a restraining order on him before it gets dangerous. IP: Logged |
PixieJane
Knowflake Posts: 254
From: CA
Registered: Oct 2010
|
posted October 10, 2011 03:48 AM
http://www.aware.org/stalking/stalkgeninfo.shtml and
http://www.ncvc.org/src/Main.aspx Btw, you might wanna get a restraining order, but it would be useless if you feel a need to go to him. Also, restraining orders have been known to incite some stalkers into greater violence...and that piece of paper isn't worth a damn in protecting you then, especially as police are notorious in refusing to enforce them (and his mom being a cop would probably make it even more likely the police won't enforce it) even when they can get to you in a timely manner. IP: Logged |
Reincarnated Rainbow
Knowflake Posts: 47
From:
Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted October 10, 2011 01:25 PM
I don't want to get a restraining order against him for the reasons you stated already and some that are just mine. I'd avoid him, but I don't know if I might be pulled towards him again. So far, though, I've noticed he doesn't like to talk to me when I'm with his sister. Do you think that if I stay close to his sister more often that eventually he'll forget about me?IP: Logged |
Reincarnated Rainbow
Knowflake Posts: 47
From:
Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted October 10, 2011 01:26 PM
I don't want to get a restraining order against him for the reasons you stated already and some that are just mine. I'd avoid him, but I don't know if I might be pulled towards him again. So far, though, I've noticed he doesn't like to talk to me when I'm with his sister. Do you think that if I stay close to his sister more often that eventually he'll forget about me?IP: Logged |
PixieJane
Knowflake Posts: 254
From: CA
Registered: Oct 2010
|
posted October 10, 2011 04:49 PM
No, I don't think he'd forget about you if you're with his sister. And even if you were, what's gonna prevent you from interacting with him anyway? As long as you insist on the contact there's not really anything you can do, unless you can get your parents and school to intervene.IP: Logged |
Reincarnated Rainbow
Knowflake Posts: 47
From:
Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted October 10, 2011 06:10 PM
I don't want to contact him. I guess the only reason I talk to him at all is because when we met I had been abandoned by a lot of loved ones, and he was the only one hwo would actually talk to me. Maybe I talk to him because I'm still used to going to him when I feel lonely. I'll keep trying to ignore him, but if he continues with his behavior I want to get him to stop myself. I don't to drag anyone else into this.IP: Logged |
Cancer/Scorpio729
Moderator Posts: 1377
From: 6,000 feet above sea level
Registered: Feb 2010
|
posted October 12, 2011 11:55 PM
Sounds like he's your go-to guy for support. Maybe it's a good idea to let him go and forge a healthier friendship with someone else that can do more for you than he can.IP: Logged |
charmainec
Moderator Posts: 3844
From: Venus next to Randall
Registered: Apr 2009
|
posted October 13, 2011 09:10 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Cancer/Scorpio729:
Sounds like he's your go-to guy for support. Maybe it's a good idea to let him go and forge a healthier friendship with someone else that can do more for you than he can.
 ------------------
quote:
Remember, love can conquer the influences of the planets....It can even eliminate karma.
Linda GoodmanIP: Logged |
Reincarnated Rainbow
Knowflake Posts: 47
From:
Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted October 13, 2011 05:42 PM
He's been trying to talk me lately, and I've been giving him replies as curt as possible. But all that seems to do is make him worry. "Usually you'd have a witty comeback for that. Did something ahppen?" "You're never tired. Are you feeling okay?" "Why are your hnads so cold? Let me warm them." "Why won't you let me touch you?" "Why are you so quiet?" "Are you mad? Who ****** you off? I'll kill them."Most of my answers have been yes, no, I don't know. IP: Logged |
Cancer/Scorpio729
Moderator Posts: 1377
From: 6,000 feet above sea level
Registered: Feb 2010
|
posted October 14, 2011 01:16 AM
He'll try to be as nice as possible to get you back and make you think he's changed. Don't listen to any of it, and move on as quickly as you can. Change your number, move, make sure he can't easily reach you. When you don't respond, he will get angry and try everything to find you. I don't want to freak you out, just be aware of the dangers.IP: Logged |
Reincarnated Rainbow
Knowflake Posts: 47
From:
Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted October 14, 2011 02:49 PM
I'm not a legal adult yet, so I can't do any of that. But I could block his number.IP: Logged |
Randall
Webmaster Posts: 15642
From: Saturn next to Charmainec
Registered: Apr 2009
|
posted October 15, 2011 09:41 AM
I know this is weird, but maybe he thinks you like his personna. Try telling him that he scared you.------------------
"Nurture great thoughts, for you will never go higher than you think."--DISRAELI IP: Logged |
Reincarnated Rainbow
Knowflake Posts: 47
From:
Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted October 15, 2011 10:37 AM
His persona? He likes appearing as the obsessive type?IP: Logged |
Cancer/Scorpio729
Moderator Posts: 1377
From: 6,000 feet above sea level
Registered: Feb 2010
|
posted October 15, 2011 12:43 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Reincarnated Rainbow:
I'm not a legal adult yet, so I can't do any of that. But I could block his number.
I don't know what your family situation is like, but maybe you can ask to live with a relative? IP: Logged |
Reincarnated Rainbow
Knowflake Posts: 47
From:
Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted October 15, 2011 02:04 PM
I am living with my mom.IP: Logged |
Randall
Webmaster Posts: 15642
From: Saturn next to Charmainec
Registered: Apr 2009
|
posted October 15, 2011 02:08 PM
No, he probably doesn't view himself as obsessive. But girls tend to like the "troubled" guys. So, some of that may be an act. ------------------
"Nurture great thoughts, for you will never go higher than you think."--DISRAELI IP: Logged |
Reincarnated Rainbow
Knowflake Posts: 47
From:
Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted October 15, 2011 02:18 PM
So, you mean that I need to tell him I find his persona immensely irritating, and then he'll leave?IP: Logged |
Randall
Webmaster Posts: 15642
From: Saturn next to Charmainec
Registered: Apr 2009
|
posted October 15, 2011 04:31 PM
No, tell him he is scaring you.------------------
"Nurture great thoughts, for you will never go higher than you think."--DISRAELI IP: Logged |
Reincarnated Rainbow
Knowflake Posts: 47
From:
Registered: Sep 2011
|
posted October 15, 2011 04:56 PM
I don't want to talk to him.IP: Logged |
Randall
Webmaster Posts: 15642
From: Saturn next to Charmainec
Registered: Apr 2009
|
posted October 15, 2011 05:06 PM
Even better.------------------
"Nurture great thoughts, for you will never go higher than you think."--DISRAELI IP: Logged |
Cancer/Scorpio729
Moderator Posts: 1377
From: 6,000 feet above sea level
Registered: Feb 2010
|
posted October 16, 2011 01:12 PM
Sorry I realize I must be scaring the crap out of you, that's not my intention. I'm only suggesting what I think would be safest for you, though Randall's point...might be more valid  IP: Logged |
Randall
Webmaster Posts: 15642
From: Saturn next to Charmainec
Registered: Apr 2009
|
posted October 16, 2011 02:29 PM
No, safety is the first concern. Always err on the side of caution.------------------
"Nurture great thoughts, for you will never go higher than you think."--DISRAELI IP: Logged |
Randall
Webmaster Posts: 15642
From: Saturn next to Charmainec
Registered: Apr 2009
|
posted October 17, 2011 12:32 PM
Ignore him if possible.IP: Logged |
Lindaland
UBBFriend: Email This Page to Someone! 
