Posts: 98
From:
Registered: Nov 2004

posted January 25, 2005 10:02 AM         

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i'm at my mothr's house.. her boyfrind comes into the house with a big grey squirrel, and i imediately get panicky.. then the animal starts scrambling all over the room.. i'm sitting on the couch.. the animal came at me.. at my hand, actually.. i was either bitten or scratched.. either way, it didn't cause pain so much as panic.. then i awoke.

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Posts: 3640
From:
Registered: Apr 2001

posted January 25, 2005 12:50 PM         

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Hello laglady

How do you feel about your mother's boyfriend?

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Posts: 98
From:
Registered: Nov 2004

posted January 25, 2005 01:05 PM         

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he is full of hate

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Posts: 98
From:
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posted January 25, 2005 01:20 PM         

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i suppose that doesn't really answer your question.. i don't like him. i don't like how he treats my mother, she's aging much too fast. he does nothing to help. at all. but he talks as if he does. his prejudices are many, and he speaks loud and proud about "fags" and "spicks" and whatever else.. right in front of any lady or child in the room. last time i visited he told my 3 year old daughter to say "nigger".. now, if you want to be an ignorant ******* that's your perogative. but to bring that attitude around my baby? ugh

i could go on and on..

nope. don't like him at all

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Posts: 6264
From: Ontario, Canada
Registered: Aug 2003

posted January 26, 2005 12:59 AM         

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okay.
I know you are here for the dream. I'd love for you to go on more about your reactions to his behaviour.....
Admittedly, I don't generally just clam up in situations that bother me.. but in this situation, I wouldn't reccomend anyone clam up. If someone does something you don't appreciate, around your child, say it loud and clear.... Some people use the lame excuse, when confronted.. "It takes a villiage to raise a child." It very well might, in a grand sense, however, it starts with you not accepting his sort of villiage.

He is a jackass. Maybe in some wierd world, he makes your mother happy. Obviously, not you. If she is 'happy' ( notice the quotations) then that is her prerogative.
Please, next time he askes your child to do something that curdles your stomach, calmly hug your child to your chest in a loving embrace, so that your child cannot hear you say to Mr.Jackass, in a rational voice...
"If you haven't the decency to respect my child's sense of humanity and pureness, then take your hate elsewhere, or I will." Kiss your baby's head, inhale that awesome innocent scent, and throw Mr.Jackass a mother-empowering look so he knows you mean it.
Then.......... mean it.
Even if it ultimately hurts your mopthers feelings.. not that this is the objective... but maybe if you take a stand she will as well? Or maybe she will see?
Sorry, my hair is up.
I don't mean to be so curt ( yes I do) but I would like to hear more of the waking story, so we can shed some light on the best way to confront this issue that infiltrates your dreams.
and

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From:
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posted January 26, 2005 04:42 AM         

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Pixie is exactly right. The dream is all about the boyfriend issue. He sounds like a real jerk.

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From:
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posted January 26, 2005 09:09 AM         

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thank you pixie
i don't clam up around him. how do i react? good question.
ok.. i keep typing along here and deleting.. i apparently am reluctant to share.
when i feel i am in a situation where the hatred outwhieghs the love, i get defensive.
luckily i live away now. i talk to mom on the phone, but due to distance i see her and my family every couple months... maybe seasonally.. me and the babies will go spend a week.
i've tried to sit and talk to this man on many occasions.. just about life and it's events.. he never has anthing good to say.. "the kids today have no respect"
"if there is a god, he's doing a sucky job"
"i have no problem with black people, i think everyone should own one" (wtf?)
endless stories of fights..
he sits in a recliner, watching football all day. or old westerns. and no, the kids can't watch jimmy neutron later. not in this room. he smokes and sells pot. his disgusting buddies come over wearing dirty sweatpants, drunk by noon, looking for pills. he has pills.. he had surgery on his hand, and it isn't healing well.. at least there's an excuse for not working now. he'll give my mother 20 bucks and send her to 7-11 to play his lottery numbers and 2 packs of marlboro. that's his contribution to the household funds, and he'll later bark at her for asking for money to get dinner at work. "what'd you do with all that money i gave you?"

i care about people and the goodwill of the planet. i just don't understand why we go on with so much hate. i've tried bringing these sorts of topics up to him. "that's cute.. you're unrealistic though."
*sigh*
so, i didn't answer the question well.. i got babbling. i snap at him. not politely. i've already tried polite.

sorry if this post doesn't make a lot of sence.

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Posts: 6264
From: Ontario, Canada
Registered: Aug 2003

posted January 26, 2005 10:36 AM         

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It's okay. I appreciate the sharing.
I know it's hard to voice how you react when you balance the inside with the outside.
I am glad he isn't an influence in the everyday sense.
Isn't it frustrating that there are still people this unevolved out there?
Happily though, you balance it out quite well.
Sometimes you just have to accept that some people are meant to be the grey and dark, in order for the light to be clearer.
Stupid squirrel man, running around causing havok.
Jackass.
I hate him for you. All you have to do is avoid. Don't let yourself feel strongly about him.. it'll drain you, you are too close. Just accept and avoid as much as you can. Send your mommy love through the ethers. I guess she has her own karma to work through.
I will take the hate from you and channel it differently and you can concentrate on living.

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Posts: 3640
From:
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posted February 01, 2005 01:22 PM         

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