posted November 06, 2006 01:05 PM         

I know I haven`t posted here yet, and that is because my "dream-life" had turned quiet for some time, which was strange, because my dream-life had always been very active.
But as I said for the last months no dreams I remembered.
And then two weeks ago that changed drastically.

Well, it`s a bit embarassing to tell, but I`ve dreamed of a celebrity; five dreams within the last two weeks. And usually I would just move on thinking I just started to like that actor, but those dreams puzzle me a lot actually, I can`t interprete them. And Usually I`m not that bad in interpreting my dreams.
So, this will be long, I fear.

First dream:
I`m walking through the night; suddenly there is mist in front of me, and it gets really dense, as I move on. It is
like a thick veil, that prevents me from seeing anything. I could even touch
that mist, it is somehow `solid`. Standing there I ponder what to do now.
And then I reach out my hand and draw back the veil of mist, like you
would draw back a curtain. A few metres in front of me, behind the veil of mist, that celebrity stands, also drawing back the veil. It looks almost as if he is my mirrorimage, because he is doing the same movement. And t hen, when we have drawn back that veil, we look at each other and say at
the same time, very surprised: “You!”
Then he reaches out his hand and rests it against my right cheek, and I
guess that was the moment I totally lost it. All at once I feel like crying. Not because I am sad, but because I can feel everything fall away from me, as if everything just falls into place. I don`t know how to explain it. But I was feeling really
emotional, as if a great weight has been lifted from my chest and I finally can breathe freely again.
And when he pulls me towards him, I surrender to the pull very
voluntarily. We kiss and then the dream is over.

Second Dream:
I am lying on a sofa or bed on my side, watching TV, when an Ex suddenly
stands before me (he`s the one I thought was my Twinsoul, but I was wrong, apparently).
He gazes down on me silently, until I ask:
"what`s that supposed to mean? What are you doing here? This is not the appropriate
place for you to be.”
It is only then that I register, that I`m not alone. I am lying on my right side (as I actually do, when I fall asleep), and that actor is lying behind me. He has his
arms somehow wrapped around my waist, so that they are resting on my
stomach, and has his head put onto my shoulder. And we are lying very
close to each other; actually you wouldn`t have been able to put a
matchbox between the two of us.
He must feel that I am a bit upset because of my Ex appearing in my sleeping room, cause he pulls me even closer to him and whispers into my ear: “You`re safe with me.”
And that`s when I tell my Ex that he should go now.
My Ex tells me that he has come back, so we finally can find a way to be together.
I remind him of his relationsship and then I tell him, that I feel we have this love-triangle going on for more than this life (it feels indeed karmic), but that I would get off that merry-go-round now. That I releas him.
To which he sais, he doesn`t want to be released.
I then tell him, that I may really have loved
him, and that I have been waiting for him for so long, but that it is too
late now. I have moved on, and there`s no place for him in my life anymore.
And after having said that he is gone. Well, he doesn`t really disappear, or at least I don`t see him go, but I kind of don`t see him
anymore, because he has lost my attention or something like that.
All the time I`m aware of the man, lying behind me. And even though that embrace, his touch wasn`t primarily sexual, it was very emotional.During the dream nothing more happened, we just stayed, lying
in bed, so closely entangled with each other, and I felt that it was the
perfect moment of my life, the most blissful moment I`ve ever
experienced in almost 32 years.
And then after a while he sighed and murmured: “I want this moment to
last forever.” And while saying that, he pulled me even closer to him.
But well, my alarm clock thought otherwise; it knew no mercy and woke me
up.

Third Dream:

We were in a room full of people and our looks just crossed; and even
though there were a lot of people around us, separating us from each
other and even though there was that big space between us, that one look
somehow established a connection, almost like a cord, linking us to each
other. Well, he then came over to me and all other people disappeared.

We didn`t say a word, because – well that will sound very very mushy
now, but that`s how it felt- we somehow could read each other`s mind,
just by looking at each other. Words weren`t needed; actually no words
could ever have expressed, what was there in our eyes.
However, he then pulled me close and kissed me. First it was a very
tender kiss, but things sped up quite quickly, and we started making out
again.
After a little while I got terribly scared, when I became aware of what I was doing there, and with whom I was doing what I was doing.
So, I pushed him away, got up and ran to the door, which was locked.
He got up, too, and stood at the other side of the room. I shouted at
him: “Unlock that stupid door! I want to get out of here. Now!”
He: “The door isn`t locked.”
When I checked that, it appeared he had spoken true, for the door really
wasn`t locked. I looked at the now open door, back at him, back to the
door, and felt unable to simply leave.
He then said: “Please, don`t go through that door."
I stared at him, and started shouting again: “You`re gonna kill me.”
I was crying, when I said that. Well, I really thought he would kill me,
and yet I wasn`t scared of him. It was a strange feeling. Besides why
should he want to kill me? That seems so illogical to me, now.
He then said: “That`s nunsense. You know that I`m not gonna kill you.
You`ll be carrying my child, our child.”
At that moment I felt as if someone had pulled away the carpet under my
feet.
So I retorted: “This will never happen.”

He started getting slowly closer to me again; I could have turned around
and fled through the open door, but instead I started throwing food at
him.
I must explain that Im extremely overweight, and in that dream, that
overweight had changed itself back into food again; cheese, chocolate,
crisps whatever (of course not in its digested form; that would have
been disgusting). It was like a wall of food, a protection-belt, and I
used that “weapons” to throw against him and keep him away from me. And
all the time I couldn`t see him, because I was crying so much. Somewhere
deep inside i didn`t want to keep him away from me. If I had really
wanted it, I would have gone through that door, I suppose.

But I was so concentrated on defending myself and throwing food, that I
didn`t realize he had circled me and was now standing behind me. He
embraced me and held me close, which was the point, when I broke down,
starting to sob uncontrollably. He cradled me in his arms and whispered:
“I`m not gonna harm you. I`m not gonna harm you. I promise, I`m not
gonna force anything upon you. But you must trust me, please try to`trust me.”
And that was the end of this dream.

Fourth Dream:

I was walking somewhere and there were ghosts all around me. Nothing to
be seen, and yet there were “entities” around me, and even though I
wasn`t aware of it, they weren`t all too friendly. They all had their
own agenda, including me to a certain degree, but I was too naive to see
that. But something happened. Because when I was walking unsuspectingly
along, there were suddenly sounds like the swinging of a sword or blade,
and now and then the invisible ghosts became visible. Actually I could
only see the trace of blood on their throats (didn`t see the throats
though; only the bloody cuts in the air), before they completely
vanished. I couldn`t see the one who had killed them though.

And then I kept on walking into an Underground-garage or something like
this; the ground was made of concrete as were the walls, too. If that is
the deepest core of my soul, then there`s a lot of fossilisation. But at
the same time it was a very big hall and illuminated by sunlight.
Actually where I came from there was artificial light, but also a
bookstore (which I had planned to stay in, but then felt pressed to move
on). And in the direction I went to, there were no other people, it was
all empty, but it seems there must have been an exit near, because the
sunlight was sipping in. However, after a time of walking I realized
that I was walking on some kind of plateau; almost like there were two
planes, and I was walking along the higher one, with very hard and
artificial light. When I stopped and looked onto the other plane,
I noticed, that the height-difference was quite big. Well, actually not
that big, but at least 1,5 to 2 metres. But the concrete seemed to be
softer there, and actually the sunlight came from an exit on that lower
plane, but of course it was darker than the glaring light of the higher
plane. I looked down there and hesitated. It was so deep down! And I
couldn`t even really see what was there. But then when my eyes had grown
used to the slightly darker, but also much warmer glow from down there,
I could see that actor standing there, half hidden in the shadows. When I
looked at him, he came closer, looked up at me, reached his hand out and
said: “Come here.”
And I said: “It`s too high.”
He: “You can jump down here.”
Me: “I`m afraid. It`s so high and the ground is hard.”
He: “You already did it once, remember? When you were a kid, you didn`t
hesitate jumping down the garage-roof of your neighbours.” (That is
right, I did it, and my feet were hurting for days after that. Lol)
Me. “I will hurt my back.”
He: “Just don`t jump with stiff knees and back.”
Me: “Still, it`s too high; I will fall and hurt myself.”
He: “No, you won`t. I will catch you. Don`t think about it. Just do it,
jump.”
Well, I took a deep breath and then decided I would jump. But I can`t
remember if I actually did it, jump down there. Because the dream was
over then.

Fifth Dream:

There was a charity concert and I was
somehow there backstage. But it was different like my other dreams; well, actually the athmosphere was very much like in the first one; somehow surreal.
Because everything was somehow blurred and muffled at first. Like I
couldn`t see and hear clearly. However, from a certain distance I could
see that this actor and another met backstage and exchanged some words. I
couldn`t understand what they said. But they didn`t seem too friendly to
each other; Judging from the other one`s facial expression, he was clearly upset,
while the actor I constantly dream about, stayed quite calm. But as I said, I couldn`t understand what was being said, and when the other one had stormed off (he was literally
steaming), I walked or rather floated closer, until I stood behind "my" actor and asked him: "What did he say?" Somehow it was difficult to speak, because my words were somehow `slurred`, very strange.
He turned round, but didn`t seem to see me at first; but then he noticed or maybe even recognized me, smiled that wonderful
smile, put an arm around my shoulder and said: "He said how lucky I am to be with someone like you."
I almost fainted or sank to my knees, because, even though it was just a
quote from one of his films, it made me go all weak in the knees and
there was a warmth spreading through my body and soul, that felt so
wonderful. However, I looked up at him and said: "He didn`t say that.
You said that in one of your films."
He didn`T seem embarassed, that I had recognized that quotation, but his
smile grew even wider, when he said: "That doesn`t make it untrue, does
it?"
A wonderful moment, but it was crushed, because the other one came back, marching
up to him, ignoring me completely (it almost looked as if I was invisible to him, as if he didn`t see me), and they started arguing.
I don`t know for sure, because the moment the other one appeared, everything
became muffled and foggy again. I said to myself. "I don`t want this."
And then I felt kind of drawn backwards, or rather dragged backwards,
and the fog became so dense, that I couldn`t see anything anymore.

Well, as I said, those dreams really puzzle me. And maybe one of you has an idea, how to interprete them. I mean, they must mean something; or I wouldn`t dream five times of the same man. So I guess, it`s worth investigating this a bit.

Thank you.

posted November 08, 2006 01:48 PM         

These dreams are definately worth investigating. My dear, there is so much pain, so much internal, emotional conflict reflected within your dreams. But, there is also hope, and healing. In fact, I feel like these dreams indicate a turning point in your life. There is something happening within you, something changing, something being released ... intense, repressed emotional energies are being released, or will be. Your subconscious mind is trying to release the pain, trying to pierce the thick, foggy veil of emotions that have haunted you since your childhood, and perhaps even before that (probably, in my opinion).

These dreams are serving to illuminate the protective walls that you have built up, the reasons for them, and their physical manifestation (eating/weight). Some higher part of yourSelf is reaching through the emotional mist, drawing back the self-made curtain of protection to pull you through into hope and understanding.

But why now? What has brought on these dreams? Have you lost some weight recently, or has this been in the forefront of your thoughts lately?

The celebrity guy is central in these dreams, but why? What does he represent? Does he mean anything in particular to you? What do you associate with him, if anything? Is there a possible pun, or meaning, in his name? Do you truly feel connected with this person, like in your dreams?

posted November 22, 2006 03:18 PM         

I know, I have abandoned this topic for long, but I hope you`re still interested in discussing those dreams.

"These dreams are definately worth investigating. My dear, there is so much pain, so much internal, emotional conflict reflected within your dreams."
You have no idea, how right you were. You really hit the right spot. I have been going through much emotional turmoil this year.

"There is something happening within you, something changing, something being released ... intense, repressed emotional energies are being released, or will be. Your subconscious mind is trying to release the pain, trying to pierce the thick, foggy veil of emotions that have haunted you since your childhood, and perhaps even before that (probably, in my opinion"
Yes, definitely. I`m not yet sure what exactly this is that is happening, but I feel I am changing, already have changed and still are. Oh and btw, are we talking about a past life here?

"But why now?"
Good question. Well, astrologically speaking it is a turbulent time for me with Transit Uranus conjunct my chartruler, Neptune conjunct Moon and Pluto conjunct Sun and Mercury.

"Have you lost some weight recently"
Yes, I have. Accidentally. I didn`t even try to. It just happened. But not that much, maybe 10 pounds or so, could have been more. lol After I had the first dream I kind of stopped eating that much. Weird, huh?

"The celebrity guy is central in these dreams, but why?"
If I only knew! *sighs* No, he doesn`t represent anything to me. At least nothing that I am aware of. So if he represents something, then what he represents must be so close to me, that I can`t see it. Was this confusing now?
Do I feel connected to him? What do you mean by that?

Well, I fear I don`t have answers. But the dreams keep on coming. Almost everynight I dream of him, different stuff.
It almost feels like my soul is living a "parallel life" at night, and he has come to feel more real to me than most people I actually know, because I dream of him that often. It`s like watching another life unfold before my eyes at night.
Pretty insane. *shakes head*
Please be honest with me; do you think I have gone mad and should have myself brought into a nuthouse?

DD

posted November 23, 2006 04:36 AM         

I am definately still interested, and there are certainly no time limits here, so take your time, this is at your convenience.

I haven't had a great deal of time lately to really get into your dreams, although I was just thinking about you earlier today, but we'll get back into it after the Thanksgiving holidays.

I would say past life influence is always on the table. And the weight thing ... it has been suggested by some that loss of weight can also be accompanied by a release of emotional energy. It is as if the person is literally shedding the experience of, or the cause of, the emotional repression at the time of the gaining of that particular weight, along with losing the weight. It's kind of like going back in time on an emotional level. Did that make sense? Probably not. Anyway, we'll get back to it.

And to be perfectly honest, which I always try to be, I do not think you are crazy at all. You sound pretty human to me.