posted September 08, 2008 03:29 AM         

I have always found myself to be strangely affected by my dreams. If I have nightmares, usually my mood is a bit off for the rest of the day no matter how much I silently reassure myself to chill out, it was just a dream. The same goes for good dreams, my mood is definitely more cheery.

Sometimes I have little phases of nasty nightmares that usually occur over and over with slightly different subtleties for 2-3 days. This happens fairly often, sometimes weeks even months pass before another "nightmare phase." Recently unpleasant dreams of my husband having an affair with another woman have been plaguing me. One dream in particular felt so real that at one point during the night my husband reached for me in his sleep and I threw his arm off me. He woke me up right after this happened and I felt angry and hurt towards him to the point where I began to cry.

In the dream, I discovered he was having his liaison with a woman who was more spontaneous about sex than I am and he decided he wanted to leave me for her. It hurt me tremedously in the dream because I am uncomfortable with sex at times and I really don't understand why...I have been trying to sort it out within myself with some progress but I think this dream symbolizes my insecurities and fears...I can understand that much.

But...I have had dreams of this sort before with my only other serious relationship and shortly after those dreams occured it came to light that he had been cheating and stealing money from me and I promptly ended things. Now...two years into with this guy, newly married, and I begin to have unpleasant dreams about him.

I have to admit i'm more than a little worried and I would love to hear about people's experience about dreams involving their significant other being unfaithful or vice versa...if it's not too personal, of course.

posted September 18, 2008 03:48 PM         

I agree with writesomething.

You will be glad to hear that the affair dreams are very common. I understand about your past experience with this sort of dream, but these dreams are likely symbolic. I can't say for sure, but that would be my guess.

Insecurities and fears, as you said ... this is what the dreams are reflecting. And because of your past experience, all the more insecurity.

Unless you truly feel there is something real to be concerned about with your husband cheating, affair dreams will manifest when there is a lack of connection between couples. Maybe you feel like he pays more attention to something other than you - sports, his job, his friends, a hobby, etc. This can be symbolized as "having an affair".

What do you think?