posted November 24, 2010 07:21 PM
You are excited about a possible relationship.
You really want to take it on - and rip into it.
You're almost feverish with the possibilities (Neptune is working over time by adding vistas of scenarios regarding the potential that you think is inherent in this relationship - but you have started to forget the person - it is one of those 'hook' situations ie. some of their traits have been developed big time to promise a wonderful smorgasbord of experiences and interaction.)
You won't go ahead with it though - something tells you that the idea of it is better than the reality - you have already stepped off the conveyer belt - you don't think you have what it takes to fulfill their partnership potential and requirements.
I do see Arabic scenes and sensations - so maybe you are correct about past life content.
I'm seeing words and word feelings such as oil, oil concentrates, gold, and sultan,and sparse but beautifully constructed cool interiors - and a drug - with aphrodisiac potential - it is giving imagery like it is has qualities of 'ice'. It seems to be connected to the current drug 'ice' but I don't know the full implications as I don't know if the current one is connected to aphrodisiacal properties.
I would never advocate 'ice' and I have never and would never use it myself.
The image I see with the drug is like small flat stones that are cracked/shattered and there is a faint green tinge to them. They look like that ornamental icy green rock that I have had in an ornament to float water candles on.
You are being kept down by your parents - but I wouldn't generally say it is malicious. They like to think they still have a child at hand to parent and give meaning to their relationship - you tend to be active in maintaining and fulfilling some child like roles and traits - symbiotic.
The relationship; the situation with living with your parents; the suggestion of hedonism and drug highs point to something :-
Something I am realizing myself as well - you are looking to experience, 'secondhand', what you need to develop within yourself. This is due to a combination of things including a deficit in self-esteem, a degree of laziness and wanting the quick fix, and a lack of education (not generally - I think it is education that should be delivered by a teacher - like a mentor/guide).
Living through another's promise of what they might bring you; living through your parents living structure; living through altered experience via drug or other highs, will not develop, sufficiently, these precise elements that you are attracted to.
You are requiring an interior development that will have external implications ie. it is generally a maturing process and will be reflected in the emissions from your exterior.
You need some help though - as indicated. You will need patience - Rome or perhaps more fitting - Baghdad - wasn't built in a day.