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Author Topic:   would these dreams seem signifacant or no?
eyes_like_pisces
Knowflake

Posts: 86
From: mpls, mn, usa
Registered: Feb 2013

posted April 17, 2013 12:47 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for eyes_like_pisces     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I think dreams hold a wide range of signifcance from very little to perhaps a lot. They could help you work through minimal to large issues on a subconscious level to holding some prophetic possibilities.

Anyway..I've been having a reoccuring dream theme on getting married or discussing marriage to my boyfriend.

This is weird to me, because I never tend to dream about marriage or romance or even sex in my dreams. The only marriage dream I ever had prior was about my best friend getting married prior to this.

I'd also like to add my thoughts/values/opinions on marriage. Marriage has never been a important goal in my life. I don't know if this is because my parents were never married and its not something I can easily imagine or because I often go through ..skepticism/pestimism about my love life and thus didnt want to envision something I may never achieve. This being said I'm not one of those women who knew/knows what kinda of wedding they want, dress they want, venue they want, etc.

However from time to time I've always had an appreciation/attraction to spontantious/quick elopements or foreign cultural wedding cermonies. Neither of which I realize are realistic goals, just fantasies if I were to see it in a movie I'd read about them in class.

Now as I stated above I've had three or four reoccuring dreams of marrying my boyfriend. By the fourth time it kinda annoyed me, and has me wondering why.

After my 2nd date with my boyfriend I remember thinking/feeling he's the one for me, I might marry him. I'd also like to add, that I've never had this reaction to someone. Only once had I thought "yes, I would marry him" but not "this just feels 'right.'

That being said, I don't know if my reaction after our second date just developed into me having these dreams (weeks/months later). Nor, do I know if perhaps the first dream just kinda planted these ideas in my head resulting in more dreams.

WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK?

(more to add in second post/reply)

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eyes_like_pisces
Knowflake

Posts: 86
From: mpls, mn, usa
Registered: Feb 2013

posted April 17, 2013 01:10 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for eyes_like_pisces     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
A couple weeks ago I had spent a day with my boyfriend (i believe this was only after the first, maybe second marriage dream). Well we just got back to his place..and he watched me take my coat off. His reaction was "Aww" then he swooped in and gave me this big hug. My first reaction to this was, what was that all about? My next thought was "is he thinking of marring me? I don't know where I got that idea from. Then I realized I was wearing a white top. (its embarassing to me, to even automatically jump to thinking that was what he was thinking.

Then I put the idea out of my head for the rest of the day. Until later when he seemed suddenly very concerned about making a good impression on my mom. Yes, its good to want to make a good impression on your SO's family but...It was weird to me how much he suddenly had an interest and concern over it. Suddenly the thought pops back in my head again. Ugh!

Times passes, I try to ignore it (we would have a long ways to go before even discussing things like marriage. Then came my fourth dream I had while laying next to him. I relunctently told him about it and all the others when he asked what was on my mind. He didn't have a response. Later I brought it up again, making sure it didn't freak him out, and reassuring him (maybe wrongly so) that I don't think it would be realistic to even get married for another 10yrs (finacies being a big reason).

Now...I'm just trying to assess where my mind really is and if I'm putting these dreams in my head or if dreams are putting these thoughts in my head. Like is marriage really more important to me then I realize (obviously only I could answer this one..but idk). And I start thinking about age. Is this just something women start to want when they get older. If so its kind of an irrational desire (not that I don't understand its benefits...but I also agree/think that its just a piece of paper and not something a person needs in life to feel secure. I already do feel secure in my relationship.

...I just never want to be one of those women that force marriage on their SO...especially when it might not be in the couples best interest.

So..do you guys have any insights on to why I'm dreaming these things, and letting these thoughts get to me. Can anyone relate to my feelings??

THANKS SO MUCH FOR READING(!!!!) I know its Kong and I have a tendency to write on and on. Also, I apologize if this isn't the exact right thread for this topic, and may not be what you expect to read, Haha.

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Faith
Knowflake

Posts: 4547
From:
Registered: Jul 2011

posted April 20, 2013 09:11 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Faith     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Interesting story, no apologies!

For me, dreams sometimes exaggerate a feeling I've had, especially if it's emotionally charged. For instance once I put a hoop earring in and for some weird reason, got this fleeting, panicky thought that it could catch on something and rip my ear apart.

That night I dreamed about my ears, which were much larger than in real life, splitting open.

So maybe some subconscious part of you really is very interested in the idea of marrying your boyfriend? And your fleeting, conscious thought magnetized that subliminal feeling and drew it out for a closer look, via dreams?

Not sure if it means you will marry him (obviously! ) but it could mean that, on your side of things, the relationship could develop to the point where you would be willing to. Seems like you have latent feelings that feel the potential to bloom here.

*Guessing*

Best wishes

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eyes_like_pisces
Knowflake

Posts: 86
From: mpls, mn, usa
Registered: Feb 2013

posted April 20, 2013 01:49 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for eyes_like_pisces     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
That makes a lot of sense!! Thank you Faith!!!

What a funny circular pattern. I have latent feeling, that manifest in sleep, and manifest further in reality ha, I think I'm better off pushing those back to the subconscious for now.

I like you're example faith. I het that dream was terrifying! My most terrifying dreams tend to be the ones where you teeth fall out (it just has an ominous feel to them!). I imagine your dream may have had a similar feel.

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Ra
Moderator

Posts: 564
From: Kentucky
Registered: May 2009

posted April 27, 2013 03:15 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ra     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hello eyes

I was once of the mind that being married "officially" was totally unecessary. It's just a piece of paper, after all. If we love each other, what's the difference?

Well, my significant other didn't share my progressive thinking, and after she gave me a quite unsubtle ultimatum, I had to re-examine my feelings on the matter.

For me, I found it to be a very deeply hidden and veiled fear of commitment, with a good serving of anti-establishment sentiment. I quickly saw things her way and decided that if this is what she wants, then this is what I want, because I love her. It's just a piece of paper, right?

I've been married for more than 17 years, I have two great boys, and I wouldn't have it any other way. There is something about being "officially" committed to another that brings you ever closer to your mate, at least in my opinion.

Sure, there are exceptions ... there are plenty of couples who do just fine without the "paperwork", but I believe that, in general, being officially married is an important part of a long-term relationship, especially if there are children involved. It's psychological, but it's important, at least to me.

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