Author
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Topic: Disturbing dream combining two of my significant Ex's?
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tgem Knowflake Posts: 505 From: Registered: Jan 2013
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posted November 25, 2013 07:58 AM
I had a dream last night about the nature of the breakup with both of my Ex's. They were the only two significant love relationships in my life...one my high school sweetheart I dated for 5 years and eventually broke up with in college, and the other my recent ex-husband of 9 years. The dream entailed the nature of the breakup, including perceived thoughts from their family members on the subject. Ironically, I haven't seen my high school love in over 10 years but my parents ran into him this past weekend in my hometown. My divorce is currently going on since last April. What bothers me is that I came away from this dream with the idea that these men and their families were very upset with me and kept telling me I was this horrible person (calling me names etc.) that the men in the dream played no part in the cause of the breakup and I was to blame for everything. Breakups happen all the time and it is usually the fault of both people to some extent as to why it didn't work out. So why did this dream perceive me as such a bad person if I know logically I made the right decisions? Interestingly, when my mom tried to hold a conversation with with my high school ex, she said he wouldn't even look her in the eye (I look a lot like her) and he was standing next to his wife who he met and married six months after we broke up back in college. I woke up very disturbed and confused...any help or interpretation would be greatly appreciated! As far as the nature of the divorce...it has gotten ugly due to the way my ex handled things but I have been really trying to take the high road and show love and forgiveness to him so we can hopefully eventually become friends and co-parent our son together. IP: Logged |
Ra Moderator Posts: 782 From: Kentucky Registered: May 2009
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posted November 27, 2013 04:29 AM
Hello tgem  As much as you are "trying to take the high road and show love and forgiveness", are there times when you feel guilty? Besides feeling disturbed and confused when you woke up, how did you feel in the dream?  IP: Logged |
tgem Knowflake Posts: 505 From: Registered: Jan 2013
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posted November 27, 2013 08:12 AM
Yes, definitely I have a sense of guilt regarding my contribution to how things ended...I've tried to get over this, by logically explaining to myself the reasons why it needed to happen..even had therapy etc. So obviously guilt is still a major part of this? Any idea how one clears this? Thanks!IP: Logged |
Ra Moderator Posts: 782 From: Kentucky Registered: May 2009
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posted November 27, 2013 06:11 PM
Consciously, you are using logic to help get over the guilt, and the dream is all about the emotion of it. The dream is compensating, balancing the energies. In your own way, and in your own time, you are clearing it.The best way I know how to clear it is to forgive yourself, and forgive your ex. I mean really forgive. Easier said than done, I know. Thank you for sharing your dream. Walk in Peace IP: Logged |
tgem Knowflake Posts: 505 From: Registered: Jan 2013
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posted November 27, 2013 09:08 PM
Thank you so much!IP: Logged |