Posts: 6554
From: Ontario, Canada
Registered: Aug 2003

posted February 14, 2005 09:35 PM         

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No strings
to tangle around a finger...
or two.
no strings to confuse this with me
or me with you
so simple
non believer
I don't want you wrapped around mine
like the string you say isn't there
I resent your longful stare
"But just let me.............", you say
How do I say no when you help me with my day?
No, I said, but thank you too...
you only care....whats a friend to do?
Maybe to your twisted logic
I said yes in some way
How do you confuse my gratitude with
"You look so beautiful today"
I said no.
you asked again
I said no firmly
So you asked in a different way
Don't pout like you expect me to honour
these strings
and things
They trap me with the needs they bring
Such lies in pretty packaging
My ego fights with your delight
wrapped up in bows that barb and sting
My red rimmed eyes are stripped of honour
for a fellow human being
You are a daylight stalker
not the friend that I was seeing
I am cognizant of your descent
I will not play to your piper
the pie man practicing his lines
the rat with silver-dollar eyes
I'll not follow your lead
how many versions of no do you want to hear?
no
no
NO
Just go.
Thank you for the memories
I'm taking some internally
I've learned from how you sicken me
you're no where near the place I'll be.

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Posts: 5810
From: the stars
Registered: Jun 2004

posted February 14, 2005 10:15 PM         

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Damn pixie. Right ON! It must have felt good to get that out. Well done! You are so strong. I was cheering you on as I read it.

And oddly, this part is scarily similar to something I would love to say to a certain somewhat recent "someone".

quote:

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the pie man practicing his lines
the rat with silver-dollar eyes

I've learned from how you sicken me
you're no where near the place I'll be.

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Thank you for writing that. It was cathartic for me too.

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Posts: 20553
From: Columbus, GA USA
Registered: Nov 2000

posted February 15, 2005 01:23 PM         

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------------------
"Never mentally imagine for another that which you would not want to experience for yourself, since the mental image you send out inevitably comes back to you." Rebecca Clark

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Posts: 678
From: north of Boston, MA
Registered: Aug 2004

posted February 15, 2005 07:21 PM         

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Thats good, pix, thanx.
I got a real kick (in the pants) out of it.

I've been that guy before.
I dont want to be that guy again... ever!

'Course, you know (all too well) just how addicting sex with a scorpgal can be. Withdrawal's a b-tch.

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Posts: 6554
From: Ontario, Canada
Registered: Aug 2003

posted February 15, 2005 07:27 PM         

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except I haven't had sex with him........
he is always finding excuses to help me or see me, to the point that it is ridiculous.. I will say no nicely.. like I have something to do.. then he will say, well, I will call later then.. I say.. But no, I am doing something.. he won't accept it.. just says he'll call or come by later.
He buys me things, helps me with lots.. but I said in the beginning I am not interested, nor will I be.... as we have a professional relationship, I am also married and he knows that but doesn't seem to care.
One time he propositioned me and I turned him down and he pouted all night, acting like an ass. He apologized, I think he knew he overstepped, and I accepted it. He insists too, he won't accept my no.. for the 'presents' and help he gives me.. I say NO!!! he insists.. sayng there is nothing to it, he won't demand anything from me ( yeah right) but it is tooo much.
Besides, my hubby was going to flip right out if nothing was done, so I enlisted help of my fellow bandmates, so that there were no secrets involved.
There is more to the story, so I just wanted to share.. it's kinda' freaky, so I doubt you have 'been there', dear scorpio.....

I am too effing nice, and I see the good parts of people. I generally attract people, but then they get to know me and see that I am not just someone they want to lay.. I have lots of friendships with men.... *maybe that's there too, but it isn't a big deal..*
I have never gotten gifts and stuff before, so i didn't have a category for it.. it was nice, nothing extravagant.. but then he'd go out of his way to make himself available to receive gratitude inducing things..... very manipulative... but he literally wouldn't hear my ' I don't want this.'

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Posts: 678
From: north of Boston, MA
Registered: Aug 2004

posted February 15, 2005 08:59 PM         

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Well, that's a horse of a different color.

Have you tried mace?

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Posts: 5810
From: the stars
Registered: Jun 2004

posted February 15, 2005 09:07 PM         

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Uggghhh. *shivers* What a creep. Sounds like this guy could even be a little dangerous. I hope not but he sounds like this one guy a few years back that I eventually had to call the cops on. Unlike your situation I didnt have to work with him thank God. But he would be in the parking lot of my workplace waiting for me to get off my shift. And the straw that broke it was when he was parked outside of my apartment (and I lived alone) calling from his cellphone NONSTOP and I wouldnt answer, so he left me message after sick message. I couldnt leave my house. Like you I had given this guy plenty of hints and even came right out and told him to get lost about one hundred times and he wouldnt have it. I would wake up from nightmares of him breaking into my house.

Then there's the last "special" someone who turned out to be a smart yet extrememly manipulative, lying con man that put on a fabulous front. Makes me want to puke.

And there was another psycho that I had to get cops involved with. That guy I DID work with. After asking me out on date after date and me saying no, he resorted to psycho-stalker-man behavior.

WTF is wrong with people? Some guys dont know what NO means.
I hope you can get this situation resolved pixie. It makes me nervous for you.

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Posts: 5810
From: the stars
Registered: Jun 2004

posted February 15, 2005 09:10 PM         

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Yes, that's a big part of it. Being way too nice and seeing good in people. Some guys will take way too far.

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Posts: 5810
From: the stars
Registered: Jun 2004

posted February 15, 2005 09:43 PM         

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It always makes me wonder what's going on astrologically when these things happen. I read an article about Pluto almost always being involved in situations like this. Usually hitting the other person's Venus or Moon and alot of times the 8th and 12th houses are involved.

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Posts: 17
From: Miami, FL, USA
Registered: Apr 2004

posted February 17, 2005 02:13 PM         

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Wow, pix! I'm starting to become a big fan of your style. I look forward to more.

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Posts: 6554
From: Ontario, Canada
Registered: Aug 2003

posted February 17, 2005 02:36 PM         

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Oh, thanks NosiS!!!
I am scattered all over this place.
Just scroll and look for pixelpixie.. pages and pages of my poured emotions.
Maybe you will understand?
Nice to meet you.

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