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posted February 20, 2010 09:17 AM         

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(Editing some of my my b/s writings)

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posted February 20, 2010 09:35 AM         

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posted February 20, 2010 09:38 AM         

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iJOLGJoX7KM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2noq4itRq3Y

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posted February 20, 2010 11:01 AM         

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Soothing soul medicine:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y44C2SgA4wY

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posted February 20, 2010 05:27 PM         

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I think you must be one of my soul family sisters. Lately I wonder can I be in Heaven and Hell at the same time. I'll check back with you later. We will be strong.

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posted February 20, 2010 08:52 PM         

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I find it difficult to understand how being "too sensitive" is a bad thing. As a child in my family photos, (before the divorce) I am crying. Not for me, but because some one was yelling or picking at some one else. I wept for them and I enjoyed hiding to find peace and serenity. I have a hard time thinking I should numb myself to my thoughts. The lovelier ones far outweigh the dark ones. The beast still creeps in every once in a while but I know how to knock it back. Being an "8" I meditate on the Strength card in Tarot.
Taming the beast within, and a crown of laurel for victory. I really think I'm gaining and I try to view my scars as medals of honor. The Lord is sending me more and more people who "know", my prayer is being answered. Praise.

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posted February 21, 2010 03:00 PM         

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posted February 21, 2010 04:31 PM         

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You have a lovely way with words, LTT, and I agree with you on most of what you said. I didn't click on your links yet, so if anything I say is repetitive, I apologize.

I can share that I spent one whole entire YEAR in bed, from depression. I did not leave the house, unless it was an emergency. I was so lost, I remember on tv came this annoying informercial, and I wanted to change the channel really bad. But the remote had wandered to the end of the bed, out of reach.
I literally could not find the energy to sit up and get it.
For two days I suffered through whatever was on that channel, until one of my kids noticed, and handed me the remote.

I don't do meds. I've tried them all, and they actually make me worse. They also kill sex drive and creativity. So, I've often wondered if there is a REASON, other then past trauma, genetics, etc..for people who become this way, and I think that there is.
When you have one foot in this world and one foot in the next, you gain perspective that many do not have. You become a much more compassionate human being.

So, of all the things I've tried, the best cure for me, is, distraction. I have lots of distraction, so that isn't a problem, lol.

When I was seriously pondering suicide, this dog followed me home, and he became MY dog, and I feel was sent to me, to love and care for, because loving and caring for other things DOES fill up that whole. It really does. Now, he is my shadow, and like you LTT, I am so happy I have him all I can do is worry on the day he will someday go!!! I realize a dog and a relationship are on a different par, but you know what I mean.

Here lately, I have been talking to other folks that have suicidal ideologies. It has been THE biggest help. I find as I list all the reasons they have to live, I'm listing reasons for myself as well! It has revitalized me so much.. I am thinking about finding out about volunteering for the suicide hotline, because, I really think I have a calling for this.

So, that is just what I wanted to share about it.

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posted February 21, 2010 05:04 PM         

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Gypsee, you mention an important key word, compassion. Many people go through trials and still don't gain or give compassion. This is one of the higher virtues and a major key to healing others, which is what you both do in your sharing. Yes, creating is a good outlet. Some day doctors will want to try to understand the body, mind, spirit connection. Especially with hormones...this is my high horse...you truly have to be your own advocate. I have great pity for those who fall prey to poor advice trying to get balanced.

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posted February 21, 2010 07:31 PM         

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hSLFeJYIw4E

"When I look around me I see very strange and dangerous things happening. Not only the war which we all know about, but many other things which we seem to forget about or not even care about in our everyday lives. Wether it is de way we treat eachother, the violance, discrimination, the implementation of Orwells 1984, the way we treat the planet, money that seems to be more important to us than the value of a human life, our consuming rage, shallowness, etcetera. Let alone that which happens behind the curtains, the lies about 9/11, the government ignoring your privacy and constitutional rights, the way we Europeans get a EU-president we dit not even elect (what happened to democracy here?) or want in the first place, ensurance companies and banks that invest our money in the weapon industies, and the billions of dollars that are invested in the war while all that money could have been used to feed all the people on earth (which would also be a better offensive against terrorism than giving them more reasons to hate us). This is mass madness. This is insanity.
The way I see it, we can only change this if we do not only become aware of all this, but also accomplish the mentality shift that we really need right now. Im not asking you to riot, but I do ask you to stop accepting this insanity and stop being part of it. Everybody can contribute, even its just about being more friendly to other people, strangers in particular, the help others in need, and reject the political lies that they try to get into your head on the not so objective newschannels.
The truth is, there is a wonderful world out there, waiting to be discovered. The world of insights, that which is pure and essential, about things that are meaningfull, the last corner of magic in a cold mechanical world. Im inviting you to scout this world, whether it is philosophical or spiritual or any other way you like. It is time to stop the insanity, it is time to view the world problems in a wholistic context, and to take the step and reach out for our true potential".

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posted February 23, 2010 10:11 AM         

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I just want to thank you, mermaid26 and Gypseewind, for your hearfelt replies. Sorry I've not responded properly yet. I just can't focus on much at the moment. I'm just really excited about meeting a certain someone soon.

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posted February 23, 2010 11:29 AM         

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I'm happy you are excited. I thought of you last night when I was reading "The Vein of Gold" by Julia Cameron, and came upon this verse.

Seek out a man who is skillful in playing the harp; and when the evil spirit from God is upon you, he will play it and you will be well.

I Samuel 16:14-16

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posted February 24, 2010 07:22 PM         

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I love harp music

As for my man...well he can play the guitar a little...its a string instrument...does that count?

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posted February 25, 2010 09:32 AM         

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I certainly believe that counts. What a lucky blessing indeed! To be so closely linked to the Music of the Spheres...pure loveliness.

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