|
Author
|
Topic: Iceberg
|
Ayelet
Knowflake Posts: 913
From:
Registered: Sep 2010
|
posted January 01, 2015 10:19 PM
  
Icebergwere I an iceberg
all I needed was
sun and waves
to stop being The clock's hand points: one
Under the water
freezes to a point
Above
the sun is melting
thy head
which reigns above
sweating and weeping
over my burial
IP: Logged |
mirage29
Knowflake Posts: 3747
From: us
Registered: May 2012
|
posted January 02, 2015 01:08 AM
The last lines were especially pretty...
you were not alone. That's good.IP: Logged |
Ayelet
Knowflake Posts: 913
From:
Registered: Sep 2010
|
posted January 03, 2015 07:27 PM
Yes, that is good.IP: Logged |
Randall
Webmaster Posts: 54309
From: Saturn next to Charmaine
Registered: Apr 2009
|
posted January 04, 2015 04:53 PM
Loves it.IP: Logged |
Pearlty
Moderator Posts: 1001
From: Ohio
Registered: Jan 2012
|
posted January 05, 2015 10:58 AM
Love the imagery in this Ayelet. IP: Logged |
Ayelet
Knowflake Posts: 913
From:
Registered: Sep 2010
|
posted January 05, 2015 04:39 PM
Thank you Randall and PearltyIP: Logged |
Randall
Webmaster Posts: 54309
From: Saturn next to Charmaine
Registered: Apr 2009
|
posted March 24, 2015 03:30 PM
You're welcome.IP: Logged |
thequeen
Knowflake Posts: 1215
From: Al Da Beatz
Registered: Sep 2014
|
posted March 24, 2015 06:33 PM
It's very beautiful..  IP: Logged |
Ayelet
Knowflake Posts: 913
From:
Registered: Sep 2010
|
posted March 26, 2015 09:05 PM
Thanks Thequeen IP: Logged |
HRH-FishAreFish
Knowflake Posts: 1014
From: Neptune next to Mike & Pluto
Registered: May 2013
|
posted June 07, 2015 05:23 AM
I think about Iceberg a lot, Ayelet...I guess that means I really like your poem. The house I live in is perched on a river bluff. The view is beautiful winter or summer. Summertime the river is bustling with life, busy boaters, jet skis, dedicated fisherman, ducks and geese with their new broods. But in the winter, there is this wonderful frozen-in-time stillness, maybe an occasional ice fisherman or two. A couple springs ago, the moment the ice melted, huge flocks of birds converged upon the newly open water. It was quite spectacular, I've never seen so many water fowl packed so densely on a body of water than I did that spring. I can really relate to your poem as it captures the essence of the water element in nature for me, as it morphs in it's visible state from solid to liquid, and then back again. (With my username, I don't have to point out that I was born under the sign of water, do I? ) Being watery, am I emotionally a puddle? Or am I emotionally frozen? Isn't the death of an iceberg really the birth of something else? Just sharing some stuff I ponder when your poem comes to mind... LOve  & LIght  ,
HRH Stephanie IP: Logged |
Ayelet
Knowflake Posts: 913
From:
Registered: Sep 2010
|
posted June 07, 2015 04:54 PM
Thank you HRH Stephanie, for your warm response. It feels good to know someone else connects to what I wrote. I don't have that kind of view from My window. I haven't watched an iceberg in real life, but I imagine it. I am also of a watery sign, cancerian. So I guess it sort of helped me to write about it.It sounds like a lovely view! Good night IP: Logged |
Faith
Knowflake Posts: 11315
From: Bella's Hair Salon
Registered: Jul 2011
|
posted June 09, 2015 01:02 PM
I'm really intrigued by this, Ayelet...it's such beautiful imagery, and a poignant metaphor. Very well-spoken.I'm only confused by the word "thy." I was expecting to see "my." Will you explain? IP: Logged |
Ayelet
Knowflake Posts: 913
From:
Registered: Sep 2010
|
posted June 09, 2015 01:46 PM
Thank you Faith. I am using the word "thy" because I am splitting the "I" in half in order to create a couple: the buried one and the mourning one.IP: Logged |
Ayelet
Knowflake Posts: 913
From:
Registered: Sep 2010
|
posted June 10, 2015 11:25 AM
It is also dividing the iceberg to the masculine principle and the feminine ptinciple, the seen and the unseen, consciousness and unconsciousness
IP: Logged |
Pearlty
Moderator Posts: 1001
From: Ohio
Registered: Jan 2012
|
posted June 27, 2015 11:54 AM
Beautiful imagery!
quote:
Originally posted by HRH-FishAreFish:
I think about Iceberg a lot, Ayelet...I guess that means I really like your poem. The house I live in is perched on a river bluff. The view is beautiful winter or summer. Summertime the river is bustling with life, busy boaters, jet skis, dedicated fisherman, ducks and geese with their new broods. But in the winter, there is this wonderful frozen-in-time stillness, maybe an occasional ice fisherman or two. A couple springs ago, the moment the ice melted, huge flocks of birds converged upon the newly open water. It was quite spectacular, I've never seen so many water fowl packed so densely on a body of water than I did that spring. I can really relate to your poem as it captures the essence of the water element in nature for me, as it morphs in it's visible state from solid to liquid, and then back again. (With my username, I don't have to point out that I was born under the sign of water, do I? ) Being watery, am I emotionally a puddle? Or am I emotionally frozen? Isn't the death of an iceberg really the birth of something else? Just sharing some stuff I ponder when your poem comes to mind... LOve & LIght ,
HRH Stephanie
IP: Logged |
Lindaland
UBBFriend: Email This Page to Someone! 
