Lindaland
  For Yellow Wax And The Ants
  I love you all.

Post New Topic  Post A Reply
profile | register | preferences | faq

UBBFriend: Email This Page to Someone! next newest topic | next oldest topic
Author Topic:   I love you all.
Spica
Knowflake

Posts: 764
From: Canada
Registered: Jul 2015

posted September 23, 2017 08:35 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Spica     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I'm writing a story and this is a summary of it. Please tell me your thoughts on it!!! Xxx

I posted this on astrology 2.0 too: http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum24/HTML/238480.html

I'm writing a story which which is tragic, deep and emotional. Even more than wuthering heights.

This is one of the lines in the story: "His eyes usually pierce in others soul when he looks at them. But not when he looked into mine today. It was strange. It was hard to explain why. But it made me feel shocked. When he looked at me he kinda freezed, like time stopped. Like he admires me or I'm really important to him. Does he have a crush on me? No it can't be he never even noticed me before. Maybe I'm just thinking that to feel good about myself. Then what is it about me? Because from what I remember it was like he didn't even know I existed. He never even noticed me. I'm just overthinking. It was nothing." Sienna when was in high school.

The title is "tragic love" for now.

It's about an innocent girl who is new at a school. She just came out of a traumatic situation so she's is really quiet, scared and has trust issues. When she first got in school sometimes people would ask her "are you okay?". She tried all her best for hands to stop shaking. The first thing people noticed about her were her eyes. They were like the most beautiful eyes. They were big and soft, and slight slant upwards at the ends. They were grey in colour and were hypnotizing and dreamy. She had good features and face, just her chin was slightly smaller than normal and it made her cute. With time she slowly opens up a little and gets used to the daily life at school, but she still has trust issues. She made casual class friends but wasn't able to make close friends because she is emotionally withdrawn with trust issues. But deep down inside she's really innocent with a simple mind. There is this guy in high school who has nothing to do with her. He has his own friend group and while she's in art, he's in sports. He is tall and handsome, he is happy and sociable but usually stays quiet. Or at least she thinks so. Because he becomes quiet around her but she has no idea about that. She is a no one because she prefers to remain in the background. Because of the trauma she went through she feels misunderstood around all the careless and happy people who are sure of themselves. She doesn't speak unless she has to. She doesn't think much about him except that he's in a few of her classes. She is too emotionally withdrawn from others around her to care about them, to have much opinions about them.

But she means everything to him. He is the most secretive person in the world. He is really good at hiding anything he wants. His point of view: she has beautiful eyes. She is mysterious. Even though she tried to express emotions, I can tell she is sane, her intentions. She is innocent. She acts like a cat when she is shy or nervous. The way she behaves is really innocent and relatable. But she tried to hide it so well. I can tell she is more sane and intelligent than others.

When she was out there in the world, around all kinds of people, the vulnerable her. There was this one person who saw her heart and kept it. He owned her heart. She couldn't hide her heart from him. What will he do about it? Now he's a victim too, not just her. He's a victim because he loves her.

They meet 3 years after they both graduated by coincidence. They never saw each other after graduating high school before that. But they are not innocent 16 year olds anymore, especially not her.

He tried to find that girl he fell in love with in her, but what he sees is nothing there. Even though she became more sociable and normal. With no anxiety problems anymore.

Before she was the truest person he found, the most authentic and relatable person he found. She was his world. Where did it go, the thing that made her alive, where did her innocence go? It was still there and he could see it, but it wasn't there as much as before. He gets angry at her for changing, and she doesn't understand why he is doing all this. She never even knew he ever felt anything towards her. She is completely oblivious about that. All she knows is that she became more confident after high school, and she was glad about whatever change happened in her. He never thought he could ever hurt her.

After he just graduated from high school, he thought she was nothing but a crush. He didn't understand why exactly he would have a crush on her. There were prettier girls than her and most of all because she was a loner. But he thought it was most probably because of her beautiful eyes and something about her demeanour. The way she was independent yet vulnerable at the same time. She was so unemotional and cold or at least tried to be but he found her quite the opposite because he could tell her nervousness, her vulnerability, she had no guards. Like she was a fish out of water. He found her her nervousness cute like a cat's.

But not him. He is trying his best to extract out that innocence from her again. When he cries she doesn't understand why. When he looks in her eyes like she means the world to him and she is the most precious thing in the world that he's afraid to lose, she doesn't understand why. But she knows it's something emotionally really deep. It's all making her feel really emotionally drained and sad and even traumatized. Why is he acting this way? She doesn't understand what it is about her. She feels bad for him, for how much she means to him. Because he can kill himself because of her but he would never admit it but it's obvious. She knows she's not being put on a pedestal because what he is seeing and understanding about her is not something fake. And now he is the vulnerable one, he's the victim instead of her.

She only seemed vulnerable at that time because she was alone, she had no one. When someone is in a powerless situation that's when they are the most vulnerable and that's where you can see their true self, that's when you can see their innocence.

She feels bad for him. She never thought she could feel bad for a guy like that before. But it's a whole different thing going on than you would expect. He tried to beat her up, abuse her mentally and emotionally in the attempt to see her powerless side, her completely powerless and innocent side, completely vulnerable side. He tried to do everything, he humiliates her, insults her. He tried to make her scared of him. And she was in some ways and in others ways not at all. Because she can see it. He can't hide his feelings for her. She find his actions cruel, but not the intentions behind them. She knows he's the real victim of her. But she never wanted that in the first place. It makes her feel as if she's dead. Like he's mourning for her. Like she is his only life. She can see his extreme vulnerability, his feelings. It's all too emotionally invasive. Emotionally draining. Depressing and sad and tragic. She thinks he ruined her life. She's can't live without him, and she can't live with him. After him showing his extreme vulnerability to her, she can't help but his feelings becoming her own. He destroys her soul. She gets depressed because of him.

She has to lie and say that she loves him back. She has to do very thing she can to convince him as much as she can. But the truth is that she doesn't love him the same way he does. Whatever you call that. She just feels bad for him. She thinks he's pathetic. But she can't judge him because he is her. She can understand how he's feeling even though she's doesn't know how to describe it. She knows it's something tragic, deep and intense.

He would stalk her all the time to make sure she doesn't run away from him. He even bought a gps device to place in her purse to make sure she'll never leave him or try to run away from him because that's what she tried to do. But she is scared to do it at the same time because if he loses her forever she knows he might kill himself. She is his life and world. He is obsessed with her. When he sees her and knows her presence is there life comes back into him. She's the only one who can make him happy.

Two innocent young people's tragic love story.

He remembers those days when he used to see her walking alone in the corridors of school. He wants her back. And she's there. Yet not completely there.

This story is tragic and you'll wish he never had a crush on her, never loved her. You'll wish she was never vulnerable and innocent enough to attract something so dangerous.
-----------

This is just the summary that's why in it I added a little bit the moral of the story in some bits but in the actual novel or story only the events will be written and the moral/emotional/psychological situation of the story will be understood by itself by the reader. But this is just a summary please let me know what you think!!!

IP: Logged

Randall
Webmaster

Posts: 87317
From: From a galaxy, far, far away...
Registered: Apr 2009

posted September 23, 2017 09:23 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Moving to Yellow Wax.

IP: Logged

Spica
Knowflake

Posts: 764
From: Canada
Registered: Jul 2015

posted September 23, 2017 09:28 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Spica     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Thank you Randall. Sorry I didn't know about yellow wax topic.

IP: Logged

whitewitch111
Knowflake

Posts: 3765
From: Hillsboro, OR, USA
Registered: Jan 2013

posted September 23, 2017 10:06 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for whitewitch111     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I would love to read it Spica! I actually relate a bit to what this is about, keep writing, go for it, jump in feet first!
May I ask is there something deeper within you that is writing this? Or is it specifically inspired by Wuthering Heights?

IP: Logged

Spica
Knowflake

Posts: 764
From: Canada
Registered: Jul 2015

posted September 23, 2017 10:17 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Spica     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Thank you for reading whitewitch

I don't feel comfortable answering that it's really personal :/ I'm sorry. I think when time comes I will tell you.

I'm wondering if it made you feel anything emotionally while reading, if so how did it make you feel?

IP: Logged

Spica
Knowflake

Posts: 764
From: Canada
Registered: Jul 2015

posted September 23, 2017 10:46 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Spica     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hey Randall if I ask what sun sign the characters should be then can this become eligible for astrology 2.0? Thank you.

IP: Logged

Spica
Knowflake

Posts: 764
From: Canada
Registered: Jul 2015

posted September 23, 2017 10:49 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Spica     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I wasn't able to edit the thread on astrology 2.0 I just wanted to write "can you help me decide what zodiac sign these characters should have?"

IP: Logged

Ayelet
Moderator

Posts: 2600
From:
Registered: Sep 2010

posted September 24, 2017 12:04 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Ayelet     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hi Spica, the idea and outline sound really interesting. Would love to read the whole story and see how it becomes alive.
Is the guy a scorpio and the girl pisces?

IP: Logged

mirage29
Knowflake

Posts: 8594
From: us
Registered: May 2012

posted September 24, 2017 12:16 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for mirage29     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
You could just re-post the topic.

She wants her friends, at astro2.0.

IP: Logged

Spica
Knowflake

Posts: 764
From: Canada
Registered: Jul 2015

posted September 24, 2017 12:18 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Spica     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Think you ayelet. I haven't decided their zodiac sign. So I am interested to know everyone's thoughts and opinions about what it should be.

Good idea mirage I will do that.

IP: Logged

mirage29
Knowflake

Posts: 8594
From: us
Registered: May 2012

posted September 24, 2017 12:28 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for mirage29     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Whitewitch ... That was a very nice gesture you made. She should have tried to read some of your stories before turning it down!

I agree-- Wuthering Heights period would make sense to be a strong area, from the expertise you've shown here! You're an impressive writer. I wouldn't doubt you could sell some of your work.

IP: Logged

Aries23Degrees
Knowflake

Posts: 4595
From: South Africa
Registered: Dec 2012

posted September 24, 2017 12:40 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Aries23Degrees     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I am seeing a Scorpio/Virgo situation in the man and a Pisces/Libra situation in the woman

IP: Logged

nordicsoul
Knowflake

Posts: 1710
From:
Registered: Oct 2010

posted September 24, 2017 08:44 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for nordicsoul     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Man:

*there is something in virgo, maybe venus because he is drawn by something independent in her. it may also been some uranus-jupiter venus? and probably some neptunian or cancerian that is trigered when he see her vulnerability?

woman: i see lot of neptune. she wants to be perceived as misterius. she want him somehow to unveil the mistery that is she. she longs for a perfect, unconditional love..

IP: Logged

Spica
Knowflake

Posts: 764
From: Canada
Registered: Jul 2015

posted September 24, 2017 11:04 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Spica     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by mirage29:
Whitewitch ... That was a very nice gesture you made. She should have tried to read some of your stories before turning it down!

I agree-- Wuthering Heights period would make sense to be a strong area, from the expertise you've shown here! You're an impressive writer. I wouldn't doubt you could sell some of your work.


Thank you so much mirage. And I reposted this on astrology 2.0 and Randall didn't close it this time.

IP: Logged

Spica
Knowflake

Posts: 764
From: Canada
Registered: Jul 2015

posted September 24, 2017 11:08 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Spica     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Aries23Degrees:
I am seeing a Scorpio/Virgo situation in the man and a Pisces/Libra situation in the woman

I agree too.

IP: Logged

Spica
Knowflake

Posts: 764
From: Canada
Registered: Jul 2015

posted September 24, 2017 11:11 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Spica     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by nordicsoul:
Man:

*there is something in virgo, maybe venus because he is drawn by something independent in her. it may also been some uranus-jupiter venus? and probably some neptunian or cancerian that is trigered when he see her vulnerability?

woman: i see lot of neptune. she wants to be perceived as misterius. she want him somehow to unveil the mistery that is she. she longs for a perfect, unconditional love..


Good interpretation!

IP: Logged

mirage29
Knowflake

Posts: 8594
From: us
Registered: May 2012

posted September 24, 2017 06:29 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for mirage29     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Spica:
Thank you so much mirage. And I reposted this on astrology 2.0 and Randall didn't close it this time.

Linking your new thread in Astro2.0, just in case. That way you'll be able to keep your material together.

- http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum24/HTML/238480.html

For yourself... You might want to post the YW link (from this forum) into your Astro2.0 thread too.

Cross-linking helps author gather and keep their info together when threads get transferred-- especially when people had responded before it closed.

Enjoy!

IP: Logged

Spica
Knowflake

Posts: 764
From: Canada
Registered: Jul 2015

posted September 24, 2017 09:04 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Spica     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by mirage29:

Linking your new thread in Astro2.0, just in case. That way you'll be able to keep your material together.

- http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum24/HTML/238480.html

For yourself... You might want to post the YW link (from this forum) into your Astro2.0 thread too.

Cross-linking helps author gather and keep their info together when threads get transferred-- especially when people had responded before it closed.

Enjoy!


Thank you mirage! I did it

IP: Logged

Randall
Webmaster

Posts: 87317
From: From a galaxy, far, far away...
Registered: Apr 2009

posted September 25, 2017 10:46 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Thanks, mirage!

IP: Logged

Randall
Webmaster

Posts: 87317
From: From a galaxy, far, far away...
Registered: Apr 2009

posted October 27, 2017 04:01 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Bump!

IP: Logged

Randall
Webmaster

Posts: 87317
From: From a galaxy, far, far away...
Registered: Apr 2009

posted November 02, 2017 10:22 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Randall     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Bump!

IP: Logged

All times are Eastern Standard Time

next newest topic | next oldest topic

Administrative Options: Close Topic | Archive/Move | Delete Topic
Post New Topic  Post A Reply
Hop to:

Contact Us | Linda-Goodman.com

Copyright 2000-2017

Powered by Infopop www.infopop.com © 2000
Ultimate Bulletin Board 5.46a