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Author
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Topic: obnoxious comments!!!
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sVirgo
Knowflake Posts: 488
From: Pa, US
Registered: Jul 2002
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posted November 30, 2005 09:04 AM
 
I have to face some people around me who pass on obnoxious comments all the time to me, which are not truth, they just want to push me very hard. I don't want to loose my control and the same time I don't want to spend time on them as they are not important for me.
But still my mind thinks.
I told them openly that don't pass these comments and don't come in my way. Do your own business but I think they love disturbing others.
So please tell me a polite way to handle it as I don't want to increase my karma and keep myself revolving in viscous circle of paying debts.IP: Logged |
thirteen
Knowflake Posts: 574
From: Rochester Hills, MI USA
Registered: May 2004
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posted November 30, 2005 09:41 AM
Take away their reward. Go along and agree with it and they will stop. That takes the punch out if you say " yeah, you know me!!"
Try it. You can say other words, obviously but it will work.
It keeps happening because they sense the resistance.
IP: Logged |
sue g
Knowflake Posts: 4466
From: ireland
Registered: Sep 2004
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posted November 30, 2005 09:49 AM
Very clever thirteen......I agree.....either that or ignore....walk away or say "yeah whatever"I suppose the worst thing you could do is come down to their level and fuel their dysfunction......after all anyone who makes these comments is probably a very unhappy and unstable person.......  ......People who are happy in themselves shine dont they......  No need to add too guys that they would be lacking in self esteem too.....  Someone here said "screw her" on one of my threads........I dont need anymore screwing, but it was nice to receive the offer.......hahahahaha.....needless to say I let this wash over me........(after all hardly the words of a enlightened and intellectual person, are they)? Great thread.....may we all learn from it......xxx IP: Logged |
sVirgo
Knowflake Posts: 488
From: Pa, US
Registered: Jul 2002
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posted November 30, 2005 09:53 AM
Yes, I tried it by laughing and ignoring. But may be I am showing resistance, that's true.
Okay one incidence like I told about my spendings recently and the person commented that so you are bankrupt.
Next is like I don't like travelling, the person told me(have no authority to say but still trying to push me) that I should go for business trip.
Next is like people have made me believe that I am pretty so person will tell me everyday that I got wrinkles so that I start believing it and person said that I will wash your brain and make you believe it.I don't know how to ignore all these comments which are too personal. IP: Logged |
sVirgo
Knowflake Posts: 488
From: Pa, US
Registered: Jul 2002
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posted November 30, 2005 09:57 AM
One of my belief is that I can not change anybody unless he/she is willing to. God will open their eyes one day so why should I interfere in God's work. Everybody learns in their own pace.
I want to learn how to be calm, sweet while passing through this phase. IP: Logged |
thirteen
Knowflake Posts: 574
From: Rochester Hills, MI USA
Registered: May 2004
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posted November 30, 2005 10:03 AM
When you explained more I immediately thought: don't share so much of the details about yourself with these people. I used to and still do it now and then they use it against you.
Try to have conversation with people without revealing too much. Its hard for me but I am learning to do it and what I found out is that a lot of times people don't really notice if you spew out a bunch of fluff. IP: Logged |
sVirgo
Knowflake Posts: 488
From: Pa, US
Registered: Jul 2002
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posted November 30, 2005 10:13 PM
Yes, you are right Thirteen!!!
I think I shared lot of my personal information with this person and now he is pushing me too much.
Today he was like jealous of my share business and I had to speak lie with him that I have stopped doing it. As I don't want to tell people how much loss or profit I had.
But now I am trying to stop he is not stopping.
IP: Logged |
Gemini Nymph
Knowflake Posts: 1245
From:
Registered: Jul 2004
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posted December 01, 2005 06:57 AM
Perhaps it's your karmic lesson to learn to not be treated like a doormat. I'm not big on karma, personally, but I seen no reason to adhere to beliefs to cause you to subject your inherent personal dignity to abuse. I would suggest stop worrying about "karmic debt," and start expecting people to treat you with dignity and respect. And if you don't get it, you are prefectly entitled to stand up for yourself. IP: Logged |
thirteen
Knowflake Posts: 574
From: Rochester Hills, MI USA
Registered: May 2004
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posted December 01, 2005 08:23 AM
sVirgo, keep doing it, it will take a while for him to see the change in you.
IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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