posted September 28, 2007 10:04 AM         

Innocence is beauty, but innocence gets tortured here....on Earth.

We all start off "innocent" anyway. What really makes an evil person become what they become? I have been inspired and deeply moved by spiritual experiences I had as a child, but I think that perhaps most people haven't experienced that. They have not seen "the light". Whose fault is that? Theirs? Or just pure chance? Some sort of tapestry?

"A uniquely programmed individual":
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cB7h2mtMQ0I

Good video- 15 minutes- Michael Tsarion remix:
http://www.need2know.eu/?p=199

I have been wondering- perhaps we are only 'Free' or have 'Free Will' in as much as we are spiritually awakened. We are like Gods in amnesia. This amnesia is the source of our soul-sickness.

I imagine a great orb of infinite love, like Nirvana, from where we all come. I imagine at the other end of this a vacuum of darkness, which just is. I imagine these worm-holes in which we may fall, why? This is what I would like to know. I don't believe that toddlers chose, on another level, to be born and get raped/ tortured, nor could there be any justification for this, not even karma.

Anyway, I imagine our spirits, our divine spark, which are all a part of this infinite consciousness, like a place of Nirvana- falling. We come to a place which is the fusion of "darkness" and "light".

When a being experiences torture, that extreme pain, or when an ignorant being inflicts that torture, they are experiencing a separation of their true source.

But why?

Is there any reason?

Or does it exist for no other reason than the sake of existing, that it just "is"?

I'm looking for a way to transmute this ennui.

I want to transmute this ennui by some way, some way other than deluding myself.......

But maybe there is no way.

I feel like an old soul, and at times I feel tired of being here.

Every action seems to have an equal reaction in the opposite direction.

"Lightworkers" such as Jesus have tried to make a difference, but his words were misunderstood, converted, perverted, etc....and actually used as an excuse to inflict yet more evil.

Perhaps there is some unseen law which keeps everything in a kind of limbo.

posted September 29, 2007 01:22 AM         

quote:

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I have been wondering- perhaps we are only 'Free' or have 'Free Will' in as much as we are spiritually awakened. We are like Gods in amnesia. This amnesia is the source of our soul-sickness.

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Gods in amnesia…wow. I agree wholeheartedly. Except that I believe that spiritual awakening is a very gradual process. As we ‘raise our frequency, so to speak, we align ourselves closer to God’s will, more our personal power increases. We become freer to achieve our full potential, less restricted by the circumstances, more and more able to transcend our physical and mental barriers. I am not saying that the barriers cease to exist, in fact, they may become even greater. But when our vision is uncluttered, we don’t lose sight of where we are heading.

quote:

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I imagine a great orb of infinite love, like Nirvana, from where we all come. I imagine at the other end of this a vacuum of darkness, which just is. I imagine these worm-holes in which we may fall, why? This is what I would like to know. I don't believe that toddlers chose, on another level, to be born and get raped/ tortured, nor could there be any justification for this, not even karma.

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I will attempt a reply. I understand that you have raised some very difficult questions, and I have grappled with them for quite some time. In the end, I decided that I cannot know why things happen to other people. Because I am not them.There is no general ‘rule’ which can be invoked to explain away the pain in this world. Ultimately, the answers I am looking for can only be based on *my* personal experience, that of some close loved ones, what I read, whatever *I* come across. As such, my point of view is always going to be subjective. So, from strictly my personal experience, I feel that most of the unpleasant things that ever happened to me, did at least some of the following in the long run, besides the usual made me stronger, made me value happiness more stuff:

• Gave me insight- unless I experience pain firsthand, I can never truly understand the pain of another. The more varied and deeper the experiences, further my perspective broadens, more tolerant I become of others flaws and imperfections.

• Made me question the existing order of things. Made me go insane with the ‘why’s’. Drove me to spiritual books, websites, spiritual people, I was/am looking for answers everywhere! From a babe’s mouth, discover hidden meanings in mundane events, find wisdom in the most ordinary of utterances. I wouldn’t be at LL sharing this with you if it hadn’t been for some painful experience or the other. Who thinks about others when they are happy, let alone about God?! I know I am a selfish and lazy person, who needs these to remind me of why I am here.

Now, it is entirely up to me whether I see my pain as an enriching experience, or whether I pin the blame on others, or worse still put all the blame on myself (‘may be I deserve it’), and lose my faith and become disillusioned. Believe me, I have done all of them. I lost my faith for one day…and I couldn’t sleep, I cudn't eat, I felt like I was dead inside. And it was then I realized that (for me) nothing can be worse than losing my faith. There IS a God. And if there isn’t, then I don’t want to live. I CAN”T exist without Him. And it was immediately after my final acceptance of ‘may be whatever happened, happened for a reason’ that I found the reason

posted September 29, 2007 01:30 AM         

And ummm...not to be nitpicking and stuff, but as hindi is my native language, this usage of the word nirvana seems incorrect to me:

'I imagine a great orb of infinite love, like Nirvana,'