posted February 25, 2008 08:35 AM         

For the past few months, ever since I have become more involved in the occult and have tried to connect to my Higher S-elf, strange things have been happening to me when I am asleep. A few days ago I woke up because I heard the soft calling of my name right in my ear, a soft female voice saying ''Tash''. My real name is Natasha and my friends and family call me Tash. I was in a deep sleep but I woke instantly. I could feel a chill around me - very subtle and this female voice was very soft and sweet.

Something else has been happening and this is not the first time. I am sleeping and am aware that I am asleep, yet there is this force that is pulling me. I can't see it or hear anything, all I am doing is trying to fight it. It happened to me last night - or rather the early hours this morning. I felt the covers being taken off me and I was trying to fight it. Then I felt droplets of water on my naked back (my top had come off - I do this in my sleep when I get too hot I suppose!) I kept on trying to fight this force and couldn't, trying to force out the word No!, but I feel powerless against this and saying No takes all the effort I can muster. I pulled the covers back up over me and hid under them - eyes shut. I am too afraid to look at anything and also I have incredibly poor eyesight so even if I did open my eyes everything is a blur, which in the dark is even scarier.

I am tired. I am tired of the insomnia and I am tired of the nightmares. I feel tormented by them. The energy when they happen is not good, or I wouldn't be feeling so afraid. What is happening to me and I why do I have to experience this. I have wished so hard for my teacher to appear and he hasn't and I am so sick of having to experience this alone - I have no answers, that is why I am here trying to find some. If you think I may get responses or help from another place on LL please say so. Please help me.

posted February 25, 2008 12:30 PM         

On one such occasion, I was feeling terrified, and started praying, I had this profound, mystical experience......what can only be described as this light, this pure, unconditional love surrounding me completely, pouring into my soul. It was so powerful, I could not question if it was real or not.

I really don't think I was imagining this experience, I felt it come from outside of me. Nor can I make it come back again at will; it only happen a couple of times or so, the first time being the most profound.

(I think its when people start questioning things which makes it hard to ever "tune into" that sort of thing again).

Anyway, my point is I use to get those terrible nightmares, waking up with terrible feelings, but ever since I had that experience, I have no longer been afraid, and I've never felt anything like those nightmares since.

Help is there if you ask.
Also, there's no need to be afraid.
You are stronger than anything in another "realm", if only you could realize this- these entities have more to fear of us than we them, that's why they only prey on the vulnerable, those who feel afraid. I can't say much more than this, as I haven't any other experiences of the spirit realms, this life and how I live it I feel is all that is important in this particular life.........

What I believe though, is that there is no such thing as evil, just a disconnection from the whole, just those who have lost their way and forgotten who they truly are, no longer able to connect to the true, infinite source as a means of energy. That's why they have to try and get it from elsewhere.

I believe that this world in which we live is the world between. We haven't been disconnected from the whole, it just seems that way. We have to learn to find ourselves again, to help ourselves reconnect through how we live and what we do. Death, death of the body, is just an illusion and the way our world is run, the way it functions, is simply the nature of this particular reality, not the nature of other realities, or the nature of infinity.

I hope I haven't rambled too much, and I hope that some of this makes some sort of sense to you.

Lots of love.
I hope you feel better soon, tulipfaerie.

posted February 25, 2008 01:06 PM         

How do you feel when you are awake? Do you find yourself worrying a lot? Are you stressed for any reason?

Sometimes our thoughts and emotions seep into our sleep and our dreams and I'm wondering if you are experiencing insomnia because your Mind and Soul are not at ease. If this is the case, have you tried to say a prayer before going to bed?
I'm not suggesting any religious practice here. Rather, the point of the prayer would be to ease your body, mind and soul for entering into sleep.
Take command of your own being. I know this might be difficult because the advice is coming from my own battle with insecurity and indecisiveness. How does one ever truly know? How can we ever be certain?
The simple truth is that we just are.
Try to command yourself to have a good night's sleep and that whatever is causing your struggle to "Leave my being now, in the Name and Light of All that is Good, Righteous, True!" (This is only an example and there are many ways to word this given your religious/spiritual beliefs).
One thing must be prevalent, however, no matter how you might word this command. You must fill your mind and soul with absolute confidence and authority in what you are saying. Don't have any doubts whatsoever. We are all a part of "God/dess" and "God/dess" is a part of Us. Speak from that part of your Self that is God/dess and do not waiver in your thought or emotion.

I hope that might help.

Let us know of your progress, if you don't mind.

posted February 25, 2008 01:09 PM         

If this is causing you that much stress, you should consider seeking a specialist.

posted February 25, 2008 02:22 PM         

I don't know if you would be able to do this but, maybe you could change your bedtime so that you are falling asleep while it is still light out and perhaps would not be so afraid. Maybe sleeping in a different room might help. If you really have to catch up on your sleep, maybe you could sleep at a friend or relative's house. You sound like you have tried many things so I don't know if this advice is helpful. The next thing I would suggest is to go to a medical doctor and get a sleep study done and perhaps some temporary sleep aids. I wouldn't say anything about the nightmares or the force just yet. Then if you still cannot rest, then see a psychologist and discuss the nightmares. Maybe ther are things in your past that you are not at peace about. Ater all, things we repress in our waking life, often come up in our dreams.

I hope you can find ways to stregnthen yourself. If this is the result of any harmful energies, they would probably leave you alone when you are stronger. There is a thread here called the White Light of Protection that you may find helpful.

posted February 25, 2008 03:51 PM         

Just direct your energy in to thinking benefits of not sleeping or other positivity. You will automatically sleep.

We are designed to sleep by our creator.

Only christs and buddhas don't sleep much... We have many threads here on how a yogi sleeps

posted February 26, 2008 03:37 AM         

The insomnia is triggered if I am worried or stressed about anything work related or personal. That I am willing to live with and try herbal remedies for (I refuse to medicate on sleeping pills).

I understand that treating this as a medical thing and not a metaphysical thing is the best way forward. Yet, my instincts and the feeling I get when the weird force stuff happens I can't deny. The force pulling is exactly as Jai (I hope I got that right) described it. It's like I am being pulled from my astral self. It's comforting to know that someone else knows what I mean. I did it last night. I prayed with all my heart and believed I was safe and protected and I slept uneventfully, yay!

I am going to see how I get on with that - praying and believing that I have nothing to fear. Fear is negative faith, right? Thanks guys.

posted February 28, 2008 12:59 AM         

You sound like you are starting to absorb what is really going on and are preparing to take some action.

I wholeheartedly agree with your decision not to take sleeping pills. I think the prescription ones are especially toxic and potentially dangerous, stay away from ambien and lunesta.

I do believe you honestly experience what you are saying, and that these things can be very real. But I also think they are more complex and harder to deal with, and the easiest thing to deal with first is the physical issue. Then the psychological. Then if none of that has helped, finally the spiritual/metaphysical. I do believe there are spiritual and metaphysical causes of illness, but I think it best to eliminate the more obvious ones first, that makes sense right?

I don't know if anyones mentioned this, but occult practices can open you up to realms of awareness that you may not be sturdy enough to deal with yet. I reccomend disengaging in whatever tehse practices are for a while. Let your body readjust to the change in your level of awareness.

I think it's great that you are praying. Prayer is a very powerful way to heal yourself and guard yourself from negative influences, including all manner of diseases.
And I'm sure deep down in your heart, you realize there is nothing to fear.

posted February 28, 2008 11:49 AM         

Surprisingly, the tarot itself is one of the most powerful ways to open up new channels.