posted March 22, 2009 09:22 PM         

We used to talk online, and have fun convos whenever we would see each other. But now I have stopped saying "hi" to him (not because I wanted to but because he just got so cold and not fun anymore), and its just weird. Plus he never wants to hang out, and he doesn't IM me anymore (all this prior to me not talking to him). The reason I don't talk to him is because it seems like that's what he wants but then he says he can't even get me to say "Hi" to him. I've stopped talking to him in order to not care anymore but I'm kidding myself. I want things to go back to the way they were. But he seems indifferent to me. We have a moon opp Saturn (I'm the saturn), mercury square saturn (I'm the saturn), and finally venus opp saturn (I'm the Venus).

I want to know is there anything I can do to change the course of things? I don't want to date but I do want things to go back to the way they were before we all graduate and I never see him again.

posted March 23, 2009 04:09 AM           

Yes I had difficult saturn aspects with my ex. And I completely relate to the whole who says "hi" first, who calls first, who invites who to this first ( just so hectic). And like the guy ur talking about my ex always made me feel while he was ignoring me, that it was my fault- and that the whole effort was up to me - again due to the "wall/vulnerability" whatever sat factor u want to call it.

The truth is yes saturn is trying to protect someone with these aspects- or ppl r trying to protect themselves with saturn coldness and harshness- but its just SO SELFISH! And there's no way round it unless ur willing to really compromise. What I found worked was : showing them your vulnerable too so they dont think they re alone in this, showing them how much they mean to you, giving them confidence and security without rushing into invading their space, showing them that ur still there not dependent on their attn to be there, event hey re cold ur still there- and I guess they gradually let loose- However this is so hectic and chances are it leaves u feel used and drained. And why is it your sole responsibility to keep a friendship/relationship going?

I ended up breaking up with my ex- after several confrontations that his saturn games are just killing the relationship, which he compeltely denied ofcourse - and i m sure he s still convinced its all my fault - But as much as they make u feel like... i know this is because of their vulnerability and oh I sympathise and so want to break this wall, you at the same time feeling sorry for yourself for having to go thru so much when u also have walls n vulnerabilities. Plus this whole idea that only when I get past this wall its gonna be gr8 i ll break them.

Truth is, not ev hard saturn aspect friendship/relationship should have the same destiny but I truly recommend making the person who s being cold realsie this from themselves and change from themselves rather in following the saturn manipulation to compromise and kneel down to them.

posted March 23, 2009 01:08 PM         

This is so true. I myself have a cap moon and even though I feel VERY deeply (it's square pluto...blah) I never express it for fear that if someone knows how I feel they'll use it against me or think I'm weak. I didn't realize we made others feel so badly.

I know myself I do the whole not dealing with someone when I really do care. Like I have to put up a wall at the first sign of rejection. Or to protect myself. I do it as a way to show they mean nothing but really I'm very hurt or scared.

Both guys have saturn heavily placed. Guy one has a cap mars, saturn on his asc, and his moon and sun square and opp saturn.

posted March 25, 2009 01:46 PM         

...It's always the same story: everything starts off wonderfully, in a sort of Venusian/Neptunian fog of love. As the relationship progresses, the Saturn aspects rear their head and the Gemini, Sag, or even Virgo planets of the other person go screaming: "Since when did you become so perfectionist, critical, and just plain mean?" To which I always respond with a classic Virgo mantra, "I'm here to bring order to your chaos, you'll thank me later."

And 'round and 'round it goes.

posted March 25, 2009 01:54 PM         

On a serious note, my DH's Saturn squares my mars, and if we ever divorce, it will be because of that. This aspect is so stressful. If we didn't have so many great aspects, I would have killed him already. lol.

I think the people who are able to handle Saturn's stress aspects in synastry are those who already have a Saturnian streak. The OP stated that she has Moon in Capricorn, and since Saturn rules Cap, she is already attracted to Saturnian situations, so perhaps she might be able to handle Saturn stressful aspects...

posted March 26, 2009 02:01 AM         

I do agree that it is such a saturn thing to say if you would only apologize etc. With guy one he really hurt my feelings a lot of times with callus things. But I just don't know how to be nice. It's like if I'm nice then he is still mean to me. And then I've lost face if I show I care. Lol.

I really think being the saturn is the worst because the planet person really is irresponsible as bad as that sounds haha.

posted March 27, 2009 04:23 PM         

With guy #1, you have some serious saturn conflicts. Even if you "clear the air", your respective saturns will re-create the same conflicts over and over.