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Author Topic:   Why do I throw myself into situations I know are wrong.
carl
Knowflake

Posts: 135
From: China
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 24, 2009 08:51 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for carl     Edit/Delete Message
*Or I should say, vaguely sense are wrong but don't have any proof.

Please help me. I have subtle feelings of foresight, but seem to, for whatever reason, ignore them. Of course my foresight does not predict the future. But it predicts something is off about people...But I IGNORE IT!

This got me into HEAPS of trouble Feb. 3, 2009, if you look at my chart. worst f---ing day of my life, I was emotionally, mentally, etc scared and damaged right down to the core. I will not say what happened, but it was awful. Why the hell did I not pay attention to that funny feeling within? I did not know exactly what was in store but I had a funny feeling something was off, couldn't pin point it.

Now, about a week and a half ago, I met someone, a friend (sag). Hit it off, looked to be a good friendship. Feelings are on high these past few days because I thought they were cool. Only to find, despite ignoring my gut instinct, what I expected deep within. That is: I knew something was off but did not know quite what it was or how to explain it. This is not even a matter of stubbornness, knowing something is off and wanting only good, not that.. I just can not explain it. No matter, the fact is, I should have had the instinct to bolt.

Early February was the WORST part of my life, worse than what many people will ever have to experience probably, very tough. March, especially late March, saw a lot of: a. Going back to my roots, being pampered like a child despite my deep need for independence and I am 24, I NEEDED that b. positive/adventurous change and new surroundings at the end of March, including a solo trip to Berlin. Now, what happened today, was bitter but I will get over it. Not to tough, but hurts just the same. I NEED TO exercise that rational side deep within that I know I have. I have it. This person avoided hurting me because they thought I was honest and nice. But still, before they came clean, upon another refusal, I was still kinda bumming you know? No matter, nothing a little beer can not fix.

But, anyways, if folks know about day to day astrology compared to peoples charts, I wonder when matters improve and I will really hit my stride.

I am discovering new aspects of myself, socially speaking, in the least expected aspects and in leaps in bounds, at work.

Well, I can not continue to blather on.

I am sorry, I can not offer much astrology advice, but I can offer music suggestions and tracks in exchange for your help if you would like. Or a chat buddy.

I look forward to what folks have to say. is that February nightmare behind me? will I finally learn to listen to that blasted inner gut feeling, even if it is not exactly detailed?


Edit: Look below in another post for chart.

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lalalinda
Moderator

Posts: 46
From: nevada
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 24, 2009 04:07 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for lalalinda     Edit/Delete Message
Hello and Welcome to LL carl

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taurusvirgoleolady1974
Knowflake

Posts: 30
From: a previous life
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 24, 2009 04:20 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for taurusvirgoleolady1974     Edit/Delete Message
hi and welcome! can you repost your chart for us?

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savanna20
Knowflake

Posts: 35
From: ca
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 24, 2009 04:39 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for savanna20     Edit/Delete Message
Sorry to hear. If anything, New Moon tomorrow in the sign of Taurus. Let's see your chart?

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Lara
Knowflake

Posts: 420
From: aspideronmars
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 24, 2009 04:46 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lara     Edit/Delete Message
Welcome to LL Carl!

I would say, totally non-astrologically now... that, you keep falling for people against your gut instinct cos you need to learn a lesson which could be as simple as "listening to your gut"

I had a horrific 6 years with someone and it all started cos i didn't listen to my intuition. Well, as you can imagine NOW i always listen to it - but it took relationship after relationship to teach me this one lesson which has now, ironically transformed my life!

Good luck

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carl
Knowflake

Posts: 135
From: China
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 24, 2009 10:41 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for carl     Edit/Delete Message
Edit:

Okay, that pic is from another forum photo album. I will try directly from the site, even though the pic disappears after a few days.

Third time is a charm, sorry to be a bother:

Hey, I used to come here as carlfloydfan, about 300 posts.

Good to be back.

Here is the chart, hopefully it stays put this time:


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Coffee
Knowflake

Posts: 338
From: Leeds
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 24, 2009 10:45 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Coffee     Edit/Delete Message
Doesnt load up Carl

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Yin
Knowflake

Posts: 112
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 24, 2009 10:50 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Yin     Edit/Delete Message
Hey, I remember you, carl.
You were the Scorpio with Aries Rising, right?
Or some other Sco/Aries combo and you had that lovely French girlfriend?

There is something wrong with your URL. Do hipforums have a link that specifically says "for UBB forums"? If yes, that will be the one to use.

I just went to hipforums and they are password protected. You probably need to upload your chart to www.tinypic.com or some such service and link from there. It's free and completely painless

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carl
Knowflake

Posts: 135
From: China
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 24, 2009 10:56 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for carl     Edit/Delete Message
Well, I just linked directly from astrodiesient just now. I will try tinypic too if all else fails.

And wow, I amazed, your memory is very good.

Indeed I am a scorpio/aries combo. That aries moon perhaps makes for some very impulsive behaviors. I always like new things. Yes, three years strong with the Frenchie.

I am seeing familiar faces after a long hiatus here.

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Plutonian Persona
Knowflake

Posts: 37
From: Denver, CO, USA
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 24, 2009 11:07 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Plutonian Persona     Edit/Delete Message
Ah, a classic problem is present in your chart Carl. My initial instinct was that you had a water/air dichotomy (i.e heart vs. head), which is my problem a lot of the time.

However, you have the other "I should trust my gut, but just can't seem to do it" conflict in your chart: Water vs. Saturn/Capricorn. Having a Sun/Saturn conjunction in a water sign often means that while you have that water sign's intuition, it will often be restricted by Saturn's logic.

It doesn't help that you happen to have Capricorn rising, so that Saturn is your chart's ruling planet plus have Mars in Capricorn so that your Sun's co-ruler is also very logical and earthy.

------------------
"The only way out is through" ---Robert Frost

Pluto conjunct Sun & ASC
Pluto sextile Mars
Pluto square MC
1st house Scorpio Stellium: Moon, Venus, Uranus and Mercury.

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carl
Knowflake

Posts: 135
From: China
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 24, 2009 11:44 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for carl     Edit/Delete Message
Thank you, thank you. Yah, I just hope matters will get better, or I will gain more balance. I need that balance between all the attributes within, and I don't have that.

I don't know what it is called - perhaps the astrology of timing, or something. But I don't know if the current out look, where the planets are now, will look any better for me. Like I said, that one date in my 1st post was terrible. I don't know if, astrology speaking, where the planets were that night compared to my chart, there is any indication of what took place.

But perhaps, if I can take any kind of positive from that moment, as tough as that notion is, it is a turning point where I reinvent my inner being. To get out of odd situations if I sense something is off, first off.

I don't know if 2-3-09 was just a bad day in the sky (astrology wise) compared to my chart or something, or if it will reoccur some day again (I hope not), if that makes sense.

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Belage
Knowflake

Posts: 35
From: California
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 25, 2009 12:31 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Belage     Edit/Delete Message
You have Aries moon (loves conflict and war) squared by Mars in Capricorn. And to add to it all, your Mars is conjunct your ascendant. Of course, your name is trouble, and if it is not, at the very least, you are drawn to trouble like a moth to a flame.

I am not sure you can escape your war-like nature. You might as well become a student of martial arts and use this as an outlet. I am serious. That way you can channel your love of conflict into something structured, and have the rest of your life more peaceful.

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carl
Knowflake

Posts: 135
From: China
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 25, 2009 12:35 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for carl     Edit/Delete Message
LoL, haha, you mean I attract it (subconsciously even)? Or I myself am trouble? I consider myself a good person, or try to live an honest life and try to deal with only honest people, ideally.

Sadly, I seem to attract either a. Very very giving and helpful people or b. Very sly under handed (and sometimes but very rarely) even dangerous people. There doesn't seem to be middle ground often.

Again, I am totally interested in how my chart plays out on day to day basis.

So thanks for the help all, either with posting pics, advice and insight or even just comments!

edit to respond to your edit: I really feel like a peaceful person most of the time, and act that way a lot. I wonder if something in the chart conflicts with the "war/conflict" aspect. I mean, I don't know if I am attracted like the moth (but maybe on a deep subconscious level I am and I need to realize that), because I try to be a recluse and just chill out a lot too. I prefer lots of alone time for reflection and down time. But again, maybe deep within that is what I do, go to trouble (sometimes) in a naive like way..

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Belage
Knowflake

Posts: 35
From: California
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 25, 2009 12:42 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Belage     Edit/Delete Message
There is a thread on "Guiding planet". Your guiding planet would be Pluto. Pluto is also at the top of your chart.

Have you studied martial arts or some sort of fighting system? Would you like to be a police officer or in the military?

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Belage
Knowflake

Posts: 35
From: California
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 25, 2009 12:45 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Belage     Edit/Delete Message
Saturn conjunct your sun is making you shy and reclusive. It restricts the "Light" of your Sun, so to speak. This does not have to be the way Saturn is experienced, but when you're very young, that's usually how it feels. As you get older, you will learn to make friend with Saturn, because Saturn is the Lord of Time. Time is on my side, yes it is, should be your theme song. Doesn't that feel good? You will get better as you get older. You can use (for lack of a better word) Saturn to be mature, responsible, down to earth, hard-working, executive and methodical.

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carl
Knowflake

Posts: 135
From: China
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 25, 2009 12:49 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for carl     Edit/Delete Message
Martial arts would be cool. I sometimes would like to do it, but I feel I lack the discipline. I saw a really cool Thai movie recently with an amazing actor who did all his own stunts. I think I would prefer running, basketball or tennis. Or even a return to rowing. I would be ashamed of myself if I returned to running because I would not be as fast as I used to. I would be mad at myself, despite the fact that it is normal to be slow after many years. But I always liked b-ball and tennis, probably better suited for that. But I am not as competitive as I used to be, that has died down a lot. More chill with games these days (cause it used to be scary when I lost as a child).

Police - haha, no way in hell! No offense (my brother is one).
Military - Ditto. My mind is not set for that as I would probably be to rebellious in that I question a lot. I think I am to peaceful for that profession, but I don't want to say more, I don't want to turn this into a military debate. Sorry if I said to much.

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Coffee
Knowflake

Posts: 338
From: Leeds
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 25, 2009 12:51 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Coffee     Edit/Delete Message
Hi-ranking position within the armed forces would really suit that natal.

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Belage
Knowflake

Posts: 35
From: California
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 25, 2009 12:52 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Belage     Edit/Delete Message
That's okay Carl, no hard feelings at all, I am just throwing things out there to see what might fit your nature.

ETA: it's possible that things will continue to be confusing for you for the next couple of years as Neptune is squaring your North Node. After this aspects ends, you'll be clearer on your life direction. Right in time for your first Saturn return.

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Coffee
Knowflake

Posts: 338
From: Leeds
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 25, 2009 12:53 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Coffee     Edit/Delete Message
EDITED AFTER READING YOUR LAST POST.

A career in the military would not suit that natal chart.

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carl
Knowflake

Posts: 135
From: China
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 25, 2009 12:54 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for carl     Edit/Delete Message
Belage - wow, thanks so much for your help! I think that last post, saturn/sun, really starts to hit the nail on the head or however the saying goes.

I am coming into my own socially in some respects, but that shyness and need for lots of alone time will always remain and I am okay with that. Mostly to listen to music.

I need to get into writing again too. I used to do that a lot and even wrote a book when I was 17/18/19, just for fun. It was like 100+ pages.

But I am teaching now, and I am quite humorous and, kind of have to be outgoing in those times. And I think I do a good job too. which makes my retreats back into recluse-land the rest of the time all the much better. I don't think I will ever have massive amounts of friends. But when I want to and feel the need to and have interesting people around, I can be real outgoing, if I am passionate about the topic.

Thanks for the help. I realize a lot or remember things I use to know that I have forgotten.

How do the two sag placements come into play? I love to travel, it is an addiction and I think sags have always been known to like chilling and can be shy. I am becoming obsessed with geography a little.

Edit: But also, what I need help with, is just to determine what might have happened on that one day with the planets the way they were compared to my chart. If it is a very tough lesson learned or not and if better times are afoot. Because it is an incident I did struggle with, hindsight and all, and not having a developed enough sense of foresight.

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Coffee
Knowflake

Posts: 338
From: Leeds
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 25, 2009 12:54 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Coffee     Edit/Delete Message
FINE! If he doesnt want whats best for him...

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Belage
Knowflake

Posts: 35
From: California
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 25, 2009 01:02 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Belage     Edit/Delete Message
You have 4 planets in Sag. Yes, you love travel and higher education. Your Venus is in Sag so is it not surprising that you will be drawn to foreign women like your Frenchie.

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Belage
Knowflake

Posts: 35
From: California
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 25, 2009 01:03 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Belage     Edit/Delete Message
I'll look up Feb 3 2009. Just out of curiosity.

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Belage
Knowflake

Posts: 35
From: California
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 25, 2009 01:16 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Belage     Edit/Delete Message
On that day, you had a bunch of stressful aspects.

The sun and the moon were squaring your sun and your Saturn conjunction. This was not exactly your day to shine.

Mercury was squaring your moon. Miscommunication and hurt feelings.

Your Venus in Sagg was squared by Saturn in Virgo and Uranus in Pisces. Double whammy! Must have been wild. You probably experienced a breakup or loss of some sort. Some of it was expected, while some of it came out of the blue.

ETA: Oh, and Venus was squaring your Neptune. Definitely heartbreak city.

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Belage
Knowflake

Posts: 35
From: California
Registered: Apr 2009

posted April 25, 2009 01:26 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Belage     Edit/Delete Message
One last thing, you also had a Mars return the day before that fateful date. Which might means that you probably flexed your muscles and it came back to bite you as transiting Mars then engaged in war with your natal Pluto. There is possibility that someone got hurt...

See, I am just realizing now that you have natal Pluto squaring your ascendant. That might account for your dislike of professions in the military or in the police. You probably tend to find yourself in situation where people threaten your safety with Pluto square ascendant. I still think the way for you to handle this is to learn martial arts, and I am not saying that because you're Asian (well, I am ASSuming you're Asian because you're in China, you might be some western expat for all I know, lol). i studied martial arts and i am not Asian. The martial arts setting is a great way to experience the planetary influences that you have in your chart, but in a safer and more structured way.

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