posted November 19, 2009 12:32 AM         

Somehow it escaped me that we have double-whammy icky, icky, icky Saturn-Mars aspects.

His Saturn sits on my Jupiter, which also opposes my Sun/Mars conjunction. Yuck.

I guess because it's not on a major focal point of my chart, like the axis of my Sun/Mars/Jupiter configuration, somehow the fact that his Mars was conjunct my Saturn and North Node escaped me.

What have been your experiences in relationships with similar aspects?

Some days I feel like I'm over him, and other days I obsess completely.. like last week, i allowed myself to look at his Facebook friends (we are not friends on there)... and suddenly, I found myself clicking on all the women's profiles trying to find pictures of him or clues as to what his relationship to them is. I know, totally psycho. Even as i was doing it, I was thinking "what the HELL are you doing? why the heck do you even care?"...

Also... what do you guys think about "signs" from the universe? Do you think that maybe at certain times you're looking for things, looking for validation, so you invent things? I don't know.

On one hand, I feel like my intuition has been very well honed in the last few years. I have many examples of having a "feeling" about something or someone, even something that seems irrational at the time... and in the end I'm always right. I honestly cannot think of a time where I felt something really strongly and I was wrong.

So, some days I feel like I'm totally over this guy (like today), but last week, I was stalking his Facebook friends like an obsessed nutjob. Some days I get such a strong sense of what I want to say is his yearning and wishing I would contact him, but I feel like I'm probably projecting and wishing he felt that way, so I can have an excuse to contact him, because I'm the one obsessing.

For those of you who don't know the story, just briefly, we were seeing one another in August/September, we had some explosive sex (omg, so amazing... that Mars of his is also square my Venus... and Neptune... there we go again with icky aspects with outer planets, damnit) and then after a few misunderstandings, drifted apart... about 4 weeks later, right at about the time I couldn't stand it anymore and was waiting for the weekend to be over so I could send him a non-chalant (lol, right... totally pre-meditated and obsessed over action!) "hi" text message, he emailed me a sad face in the subject line and a simple "I miss you" in the body of the message. I feel like that was also validation of my intuition... that week, I felt like I was going to pop with thoughts of him and feeling like it couldn't possibly be one-sided, that I "felt" that he missed me, somehow.

So we texted back and forth all week and then it died down and I just felt like he was playing with me (this is me trying to be rational and listening to the tough love advice from others), after two weekends post "i miss you" and no attempt by him to see me, I got really angry and deleted him from Gmail chat and also, I've ignored two of his text messages (last one was two or 3 weeks ago).

Anyway, so my question about signs from the universe and intuition... well... every time I find myself thinking about him strongly, I'll see things that relate to him, like over and over again let's say, references to Brazil (he's of Brazilian descent) will come up within minutes of each other when I'm thinking of him, again and again and again, as if it's not allowing me to put him out of my head when I'm trying to decide thats what I'm going to do... or the other day i was on the train thinking really hard about him and then I chastised myself like "GAH STOP IT!!! GET HIM OUT OF YOUR HEAD!!! FORGET IT!!!" and the train turned the corner in that moment and I gasped because I thought it was his motorcycle parked on the road there. He has a really distinctive motorcycle... it looked EXACTLY like his... it felt like it was saying "no, don't forget him"... WTF???

Am I just nuts?

We have some nice things in synastry... but also some really horrible Uranus and those damned Saturn aspects. And Neptune. I look at those and I think, PHEW!!! YOU DODGED A BULLET THERE!

Am i right?

A lot of questions and rambling, feel free tio skim and just answer whatever floats your boat, hahaha.

Edited to add: I'm actually leaving the country at the end of the month, so the thing never really had a future anyway, and he was possibly moving across country and part of me wonders if that is why he pulled away... I know that is why I didn't respond to his texts several weeks ago, I was so annoyed, I thought "gah!! what is the point now? you've wasted all this time we could have enjoyed each other and I'm leaving in a month, stop wasting my time!"...

However, he's not only super attractive, but he's incredibly articulate, creative and intelligent and someone I'd like to know... so I've decided that when I'm away, I will shoot him off a quiet "hey... i thought of you, how are you?" email.

At the moment, I'm just pointlessly obsessing. I don't even want to see him at this point, it would just feed the obsession. I feel like when I get home, I can go about my business and maybe meet someone new and when I'm feeling less compulsive about him, maybe I can try to be his friend from a forced distance. He actually is pretty damn cool.

posted November 20, 2009 11:49 PM         

If he was born in the first 2 hours of the day however, then he's a Scorpio Moon. I could be wrong, but I think that fits him better. He has a kind of quiet melancholy about him, he doesn't have that open gregarious nature I associate with fire/Sag Moons... my mother is a Sag moon. He's very brooding and a bit of a closed book. I've had to ask him specific things to get him to talk about himself.

posted November 21, 2009 12:47 AM         

I'm obviously just a little kooky, since I'm so into astrology, but I really try to be rational as much as I can be and I just can't decide what I think.

In favour of the "signs" side is that, without any prompting on my part, just talking about their own situations, two people I know have talked to me about "signs" and how much they believe in them. and I've been having this debate with myself internally and of course I think, maybe it's a sign that signs are real and there are no coincidences?!!

and then of course there is me and my intuitions which have never been wrong, and I have ignored them in the past, in the face of strong evidence that seemed like my intuition was wrong. I was being rational. And I should have listened to my gut.

And, let me tell you, my gut isn't telling me that this is the love of my life or that we were "meant to be" or anything like that. I just feel like I am meant to know him and there is something special about him, and I don't want to never hear from him again.

It must be the Saturn and the Pluto.

posted November 21, 2009 01:26 AM         

This is what it says:

One Way Love
In doing a chart comparison between two people it's always best to focus on the standouts to find the essence of the relationship.

Many times, clients ask and wonder: is this love, is it just friendship or sympathy or is it lust...

Astrology can tell.

One of the most important factors in a chart comparison, among others, is the analysis of the planets and bodies that conjunct the angles (Ascendant, MC, Descendant and IC) in the natal chart of the other person.

This is one of the best indications of attraction between two people and this should never be neglected when you compare two charts for mutual attraction.

The analysis of the planets and bodies that conjunct the angles of the other person (orb 6° but the closer the orb the better) describes whom you are attracted to or vice versa. To a lesser extent, the other aspects (squares, and especially sextiles or trines) can be important too if they are exact. In this article we will only focus on the most important aspect of all: the conjunction.

The rule goes as follows: the person whose angles are conjunct a planet or body of the other person, is in love or feels highly attracted to that other person (which we often call "the planet person").

The more the conjunction is exact (0° 00'), the more powerful and irresistible love and attraction becomes. While an orb of 6° still works, we do prefer smaller orbs and much more prefer an orb of 3°. The reason is that a wider orb may be overruled by other exact aspects and/or midpoints. FYI: exact midpoints between two persons always overrule the aspects!

If you follow our Love Letters for some time, you may already know how much we pay attention to very very small orbs and exact aspects! This works and will keep you to the very basics and standouts too.

Example: when the MC of person A is conjunct Venus of person B, then person A is in love with person B. B will only be in love with person A (reciprocal love) if his/her angles too are conjunct a planet or body of person A.

So, if in the chart comparison you only find that planets of a person aspect an angle in the natal chart of the other person, than you do know that there is just one way love!

If in the chart comparison, we find planets of a person conjunct an angle of the other person AND a planet of the other person conjuncts an angle of the 1st person, than we know there is reciprocal or shared love.

The most important bodies to conjunct an angle of another person are the Moon and Venus (the Moon pointing to a comfort zone and the one you turn to and Venus denoting love), followed by any other planet or body (the Sun, Mercury, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune or Pluto). The Moon's Nodes are highly important too and can bring kind of a fated attraction.

However, do know that when there is one way love, the "planet person" may just feel sympathy for the "angle person" (and not love) and may (easily) quit the relationship for another person/lover.

Mind though that attraction as such has nothing to do with endurability. It's not because a planet of the other person conjuncts one of your angles and vice versa, that you will build a lasting love union. A planet conjunct an angle is just a very strong and powerful indication of attraction and when the Moon or Venus are involved, of love; nothing more, nothing less.

Also, the "angle person" is the most vulnerable one, because his/her feelings of love are triggered. This may result in lover's burnout, denoting that the "angle person" does EVERYTHING to satisfy the (needs of the) "planet person" and draining the own energy field. If love is not reciprocal, the "angle person" may hopelessly chase a fata morgana, fill a bottomless bottle. Though there may be sympathy from the planet person, consider that sympathy is NOT love and the feelings are not of the same kind, intensity and "frequency"!

This way, there is no balance between two people and love can become a very painful experience for the "angle person."

There is nothing more painful than love that is not returned, not reciprocal and it's best to advice the "angle person" to do everything possible to let the "planet person" go. There is no need to chase something one cannot obtain. There is no way to force fate because that's just going against the flow of life and higher energy fields we cannot change or overpower. We all must learn to go with the flow and not against it. It's senseless to burn ourselves out and make our own life a misery.

You can sign up for the newsletter and get back issues here: http://www.cosmitec-astrological-compatibility-advice.com/CosmiTecs_Love_Letter -backissues.html

I very quickly went over and had a look at a few charts in order to validate that info... and it seems to hold up in my, admittedly very small pool of subjects.

So in my marriage, my ex-husband definitely loved me more and was obsessed with (and very controlling of) me.

He had a natal Jupiter/Saturn conjunction at 7 of Libra. Oh, hi! That is my ASC.

Then my Sun/Mars conjunction which natally opposes Jupiter ran along his ASC, albiet at a wider orb (5 degrees). Plus, my mercury is exact on his ASC. I never realized we had so much angle action! Wow.

Then the Pisces Psycho #2 (husband is #1, lol)... his Pluto sits on my ASC, much like The Leo's does. His Venus sits on my DC! Then my natal Sun/Mars/Jupiter configuration runs along his MC/IC with a 3 degree orb. And my Chiron is conjunct his DC (3 degree orb).

In my father's current marriage, he and his wife have all kinds of angle action back and forth, too.

Another friend of mine who has been married for 20 years, they also have all kinds of back and forth angle action.

I don't think I realized how crucial angles were in synastry for long term love relationships. Interesting.

posted November 21, 2009 12:31 PM         

and many other wonderful contacts too. as well as some HEAVY connections with pluto, saturn, neptune AND uranus.

we WERE very much, reciprocally, in love. however there are no guarantees in life or astrology. it lasted about 8 years as an active relationship, another 3 in on/off dissolution, and another 11 years in legal terms...ie we divorced when our daughter was 18, 22 years after getting together...

posted November 21, 2009 02:57 PM         

ALSO his asc sq mine (tho it is 8* orb)
his MC sq mine (2* orb)

also
his NN conj my venus
his mars trine my venus
his sun opp my jupiter
his saturn trine my venus
his moon trine my merc + saturn
his jupiter widely trine my sun AND NN
and exactly trine my fortuna
his chiron conj my NN

posted November 23, 2009 04:18 AM         

But, I have to admit, I feel really galled when I imagine that I will never have sex with him ever again, LOL!!! I can't help but internally scream "arrgghh nooooooooooooooooo!!!"...

I want more :|