Posts: 3
From: Canada
Registered: Feb 2010

posted February 20, 2010 04:39 PM         

---

What are some natal aspects that would make it hard for someone to extend themselves to another in a personal relationship. Say, someone really does care for another, but has problems reaching out to them. Are there any aspects that would indicate this?

My SO has Venus Sq. Pluto, a very close one. I'm thinking this is what's causing some of these issues.

Your words are appreciated.

IP: Logged

Posts: 274
From:
Registered: Jan 2010

posted February 20, 2010 05:02 PM         

---

moon/saturn
venus/saturn

IP: Logged

Posts: 925
From: richmond va
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 20, 2010 05:36 PM         

---

It could be in the synastry too if it's not in the natal.

IP: Logged

Posts: 388
From: New York, NY
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 20, 2010 06:22 PM         

---

If your significant other has any stressed aspects to the rulers of the 2nd, 5th, 8th or 11th houses, these are the houses that rule self esteem, the ability to give and receive love and how someone feels about the value of others. These blocks can be worked through. Almost everyone has some of these measurements but they can really affect how someone behaves in relationship.

That's why it's so hard to just do a synastry comparison without looking at each individual's chart first. Your synastry can be absolutely perfect looking, but if one person is struggling with their own difficult issues, it doesn't matter how great the synastry looks, the other person has to be able to comfortably step up to the plate.

Life is complicated, relationships are complicated.

IP: Logged

Posts: 885
From:
Registered: Nov 2009

posted February 20, 2010 06:50 PM         

---

Natal - Venus square Mars.
- Venus square Saturn
- Moon square Saturn
- Venus Retro (sometimes)
- Venus and Mars in their fall/detriment (only if it is both.. one wouldn't be enough imo)
- Either Moon or Venus in Pisces, Scorpio or Capricorn
- Asc in Capricorn or Scorpio
- A lack of fire in their chart
- A lack of water in their chart
- A predominance in air (specially if the sign is Aquarius, because this is a transpersonal sign)

IP: Logged

Posts: 172
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 20, 2010 07:59 PM         

---

I have trouble opening up emotionally:

- air is strong in my chart
- capricorn rising
- saturn in Scorpio
- venus opposite pluto
- capricorn moon

IP: Logged

Posts: 292
From: US
Registered: Dec 2009

posted February 20, 2010 10:14 PM         

---

edit

IP: Logged

Posts: 366
From: Florida
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 20, 2010 11:22 PM         

---

All of the above are true, but also look at what planet is in the 8th house. Saturn in the 8th could point to a struggle with intimacy.

This is from The Twelve Houses by Howard Saportas: The 8th describes "that which is shared" and the manner in which we fuse and unite with others. The 8th is where we attempt to merge. The 8th is labeled the house of sex, death, and regeneration. Relating deeply with another person entails a kind of death, the letting go and breaking down of our ego boundaries and tightly knit identiy. In sex and intimacy, we expose parts of ourselves which are normally kept hidden.

IP: Logged

Posts: 274
From:
Registered: Jan 2010

posted February 20, 2010 11:31 PM         

---

my sister has Saturn in the eighth. she has never been without a relationship since she was 16. She's now 25 with two babies, and she is extremely close emotionally with her boyfriend.

IP: Logged

Posts: 859
From:
Registered: Aug 2009

posted February 21, 2010 05:24 AM         

---

I was as your sister extremely close emotionally to my exhusband. I have 2 children and 2 mirrage behind me.

I've saturn in house 8. Im not sure about my house system, but I've allways use placidus and house 8.

I've moon in square saturn. moon in square merk/uranus,
moon sextil Sun/AC/makemake

IP: Logged

Posts: 1302
From: Chennai, India
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 21, 2010 06:56 AM         

---

<<
That's why it's so hard to just do a synastry comparison without looking at each individual's chart first. Your synastry can be absolutely perfect looking, but if one person is struggling with their own difficult issues, it doesn't matter how great the synastry looks, the other person has to be able to comfortably step up to the plate.

Life is complicated, relationships are complicated.>>

Very true.

IP: Logged

Posts: 1312
From: U.K
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 21, 2010 07:01 AM         

---

The whole chart needs to be taken into account. The synastry is also going to be significant.

Who tells everyone everything? Not many people I know. Human beings are contradictory. So it shouldn't be a surprise to find that one part of the chart suggests they find it easy to communicate with other people, somewhere else they are inclined to be secretive. What impression to you get from the whole picture?

What about transits, progressions, solar arcs? Life might have taught them to be wary. Maybe you can see that in those trends.

Two people sitting together might tell each other things they've not shared with anyone else. Put one of them with someone else the same thing just won't happen. The question implies there is something psychologically wrong with one person. Maybe s/he just isn't as comfortable speaking to this person as s/he might be with someone else. It is always a possibility, though that isn't to say there isn't something doing in their persona that means they have this tendency with everyone and it causes them problems. I just wouldn't assume that Venus SQ Pluto = emotionally blocked. Life and people just aren't that simple.

IP: Logged

Posts: 107
From: melbourne/victoria/australia
Registered: May 2009

posted February 21, 2010 12:47 PM         

---

I got Saturn in the 8th and a stressed out Venus,

Venus opposing Saturn and squaring Jupiter.

Being an emotional brick wall has been a common complaint from lovers/boyfriends. As much as i want to open up to someone, i can only give a small part of myself but like someone was saying about their sister, from 16-22 i was with a boyfriend, i've spent 2.5 years by myself and the biggest challenge was learning to love and accept myself.

IP: Logged

Posts: 3
From: Canada
Registered: Feb 2010

posted February 21, 2010 04:40 PM         

---

Thanks for all your input Knowflakes!

Yes, I agree the individual chart is of utmost importance, I have yet to figure out his house aspects.

But I just though about it, we do have the 2 dreaded synastry aspects out there: Venus and Moon sq. Saturn at 4 degrees.

But is it all bad? ..Can't something positive come of these aspects..? (We do have other aspects that soften these hard edges mind you.)

IP: Logged

Posts: 3120
From: aspideronmars
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 21, 2010 04:50 PM         

---

quote:

---

moon/saturn
venus/saturn

---

These don't make for emotional blockages!!! I have all of them tight conjunct and i'm not emotionally blocked.. in fact, i'm very unblocked

IP: Logged

Posts: 885
From:
Registered: Nov 2009

posted February 21, 2010 04:56 PM         

---

Ceres - maybe post his chart.. I agree with those who said the natal issues he may have are as significant, if not more - than the synastry.

Lara - I think it's mainly squares causing that problem.. Conjunctions can be as positive as a Trine.. sometimes. I don't camp conjunctions with other harsh aspects (as some do).

IP: Logged

Posts: 98
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 21, 2010 06:29 PM         

---

Very interesting.

This is what I think my Virgo has, he has:

Virgo sun, moon and mercury squaring uranus, jupiter and neptune in Sagittarius.
Saturn in Scorpio
Capricorn rising
Venus retrograde

He is very emotionally cold and has a very hard time expressing himself emotionally or to talk about his feelings. He actually does not feel comfortable talking about feelings or relationships at all.

IP: Logged

Posts: 3120
From: aspideronmars
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 21, 2010 06:35 PM         

---

Good point Vapor!

I don't camp anything

IP: Logged

Posts: 1351
From:
Registered: May 2009

posted February 21, 2010 07:07 PM         

---

Mars opposite Saturn can be a cause of this, mainly because Mars is the initiator, and with Saturn's limiting/restricting quality, there might be some difficulty in initiating many things, including emotions. Or... it might be a reluctance of sorts to lose control over to emotions.

Of course, the obvious would be some "afflicted" Moon, which makes a person more introverted, or less aware of their emotions. With external help from an objective party who identifies these blockages, the person might later learn to work on them. As many have said, the whole chart needs to be considered because one aspect is usually not enough to make a fair assessment.

IP: Logged

Posts: 859
From:
Registered: Aug 2009

posted February 21, 2010 07:19 PM         

---

Sometimes I'm also to much unblocked even if I have got one saturn moon square. For me my moon square get me more in times of depressed.

IP: Logged

Posts: 20
From: Europe
Registered: Jul 2009

posted February 22, 2010 08:51 AM         

---

Moon/Saturn hard aspects among others

I have Moon/Saturn square and it can make you feel very unworthy and small and insecure. I also have a major inferiority complex I mean, I don't have difficulties to open up emotionally, I just don't think that anyone could love me-for me.

I really don't like that aspect in my natal chart but I believe it has some positive effects as well-it's just that I haven't figured those out, at least not yet

IP: Logged

Posts: 847
From: Sydney, Australia
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 22, 2010 01:36 PM         

---

I block emotions and hide how i really feel.. ALWAYS!

Venus in 12th.

IP: Logged

Posts: 720
From:
Registered: Apr 2009

posted February 22, 2010 06:30 PM         

---

You guys could really use Liz Greene's text on Saturn:

http://www.amazon.com/Saturn-New-Look-Old-Devil/dp/0877283060/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1266881498&sr=8-1

used & new from $4.50

IP: Logged

Posts: 3
From: Canada
Registered: Feb 2010

posted February 22, 2010 08:03 PM         

---

Thanks for the link Lonake, Liz Greene is excellent! Definitely want to check the bookstore for that one.

IP: Logged