posted July 21, 2010 06:41 PM         

1. I know that I want to pursue performance as a career (after dabbling some other career choices). I have taken classes and got some paid experience with it. The problem is that I have trouble focusing in school. I can't sit still in lectures after 45 minutes, and I'm very distressed about it. I want to take a gap year from school, and take a part-time job during the day while I go to auditions, take lessons, or perform at night. I do see Venus and Saturn in the tenth house. Could those planets reflect my struggles between career and school?

2. Is there something in the chart that suggests PDD-NOS, or other neurological conditions, and why I kept on getting misdiagnosed? About me not focusing: I think I have PDD-NOS, Pervasive Developmental Disorder-Not Otherwise Specified. It is a type of autism, although it does not follow a high-functioning or low-functioning spectrum. I do know that from the Mercury square Neptune aspect in my chart, there is a suggestion about me liking music. One of my symptoms is that I flap my hands when I listen to music and dance in a very unusual way. People I know commented that they have never seen anyone who is that absorbed into music like I am. And I am also constantly on the go (something to do with Mercury, perhaps?). I could not sit still and focus after 45 minutes during a lecture, as I have previously stated.

posted July 21, 2010 07:21 PM         

your sun in virgo and mercury in the 8th house makes you rather discriminating and peircing. you can sift through details and have almost a compulsion to get to the bottom of things.

the venus/pluto/midheaven conjunction is what is getting you into performance. what type of performance are you into? i could see you being an investigative journalist with television appearances.

posted July 21, 2010 07:35 PM         

i think the issue here is that you hardly have any tight aspects in your chart. everything is very loose which seems like you would be rather unintegrated.

i find that it is imperative to work through your saturn to really unlock one's chart. for you who is a cap rising with saturn in the 10th, its even more necessary. so there is a lot of stress on your mercury to get to work.

you have been through some awful transits recently. saturn emphasized your sun moon opposition buy being conjunct your sun and opposed your moon the past 6 months or so. i would wonder what happened in your close relationships as the moon rules your 7th house of partnerships and and the sun is ruler of leo which is intercepted in your 7th house.

and now saturn will be conjuncting your mercury. pluto has been on your neptune in the 12th house for the last year or so. maybe with saturn conjuncting your 5th house of creativity, you feel pressure to manifest something. but saturn never does anything fast. so take your time and make a good decision about where you will go from here or else your saturn return around 2014 or so might be a nightmare.

i would say stay in school. maybe try to adjust your schedule so that it is more manageable. perhaps take classes and pursue performance opportunities at the same time.

posted July 21, 2010 08:19 PM         

if you are doing all of this work to be a performer and you are studying it, why are you questioning? are you doubting yourself?

posted July 21, 2010 08:20 PM         

quote:

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you have been through some awful transits recently. saturn emphasized your sun moon opposition buy being conjunct your sun and opposed your moon the past 6 months or so. i would wonder what happened in your close relationships as the moon rules your 7th house of partnerships and and the sun is ruler of leo which is intercepted in your 7th house.

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I had plenty of things going wrong this past school year. I made arrangements with my profs so that I only show up for exams and turn in my work in a folder. Then, right around the midterms of the spring quarter I got sick with bronchitis. I missed three weeks of school and that added more stress since I fell even more behind. Now, I'm struggling with incompletes from four courses, one of which is from Fall 2009.

posted July 21, 2010 08:39 PM         

quote:

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if you are doing all of this work to be a performer and you are studying it, why are you questioning? are you doubting yourself?

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I'm actually not majoring in theatre or performance arts in school. I'm studying liberal arts. I take acting lessons elsewhere, and apply for local film and theatre gigs via Internet. Plus, I have an agent.

The doubting comes from how my autistic symptoms and depression affected my choices in classes and career. I love performing, and I don't want to give it up even with many rejections. Plus, I know my talent has improved significantly from where I started. I just can't stop moving. This is hard for me to handle, especially when it comes to school. I took online courses which are very helpful. Yet, when there are classes that I have to take in lecture settings I get nervous. I'm worried that my other classmates will notice me fidgeting in my seat while I struggle to pay attention. Even if I'm sitting in front row of the classroom, I sometimes get spaced out when the professor calls on me because I spent more time controlling my fidgeting.

posted July 21, 2010 08:54 PM         

the first thing i want to say is that i wonder if the pressure and bullying from your parents has somehow caused these symptoms. have you stood up to them, gained your own ground and taken your own authority? i am a caprising too. and some of our placements are similar pluto just got off my 12 house neptune and it definitely made me question a lot of everything.

secondly, you should start another thread and put Glaucus's name in the topic line. he will really be able to help you out as he is a very thorough and accomplished astrology and he has experience in what you are dealing with.

posted July 21, 2010 09:05 PM         

Yeah, I will start another thread and consult with Glaucus.