posted November 21, 2010 07:26 PM              

once u get them in though, u have to pretend that ur fake injured.. trip over your foot or something (MAKE SURE THEY SEE!) and make sure to use lots of 'ows', *bonus* and boner if you pout!

once you've been bandaged up by them and they've spoon fed you what you've baked (to get you all better) you offer to pay them some money (chances are they won't decline) and then you thank them for all their time and how it was greatly appreciated.

then, you whine and get depressed because you say their company was so great and you're afraid that you'll never see them again so that they feel pity.

cancer's are big on guilt, gets em every time! once you've covered everything and have handled your basics, you let them go home with some of your tupperware and escort them out maybe even going so far as telling them you never want to see them again..

cancer's are intuitive.. they'll understand that you're only saying that because of the pain.. from there on out, they'll cling to that tupperware for dear life and store it in a box or possibly even bring it back to you but just to see you again..

if they give you the tupperware, you have to give them something back..

it's the only way they feel they haven't let you down because in a way, they've never left you.. it gives them a sense of continuity..

keep that game up for a little bit and soon enough, the cancer will be clawed to your foot as you scurry all throughout the house on cleaning day because they're afraid of you leaving them.

then, and only then, will you realize the sh(t that you've gotten yourself into and there won't be a day where if you try to break up with them, that it will be forgotten.

if they have a lot of capricorn, they're gonna leave your house and take all of your shoes, your pans will have gone missing, your clothes may be destroyed, they run off with your daily valuables and keep em hostage..

your phone won't stop ringing..

they'll call and call and call only to tell you that they hate you and that they need some final things handled but they'll never be handled because there'll always be more.

and once there is no more, they'll break down again and ask you why before telling you that they hate you again but some may even take you back only to get back at you a bit later by leaving you because of you leaving them.

some of this can be used to also attract a libra but we'll delve into that a bit later.

and remember, nothing posted after this by any of them will be true.

posted November 21, 2010 08:06 PM            

I'd add some cheesy poems to the roll, burning candles displaying "I love you" setting off the smoke alarm! (personal experience)

Actually, I'd say that all a Cancer needs in a partner is:"a velvet glove in an iron arm"!

posted November 21, 2010 08:08 PM              

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Looooolllllsssss! That was really awesome!
I can't wait for the next...

I'd add some cheesy poems to the roll, burning candles displaying "I love you" setting off the smoke alarm! (personal experience)

Actually, I'd say that all a Cancer needs in a partner is:"a velvet glove in an iron arm"!

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posted November 21, 2010 08:57 PM              

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I'm a Cancer sun and I love to cook especially if I'm making it for the people I love it makes me sooo happy to see them eat and be happy and comfortable.

Sigh.. I can't wait to be a mother.

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posted November 21, 2010 10:38 PM            

Oh,and I cook as a necccesity but I think tupperware is the most BORING subject in the world. Bring me a book or meet me at Barnes&Noble instead?

posted November 21, 2010 11:20 PM              

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You know, I'm trying to think how I seduced my Cancer but I just can't think of any deliberate attempts to seduce him. It just kind of happened. I'm not exactly the most domestic woman, either.

He gets mad when I don't make his bed >:]

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does he really? ugh, and ain't it the worst!

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Someone is obviously in a humorous mood tonight. I mean, if you were actually serious you know you would not get past the door with that crap, right?...LOL.

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I have many Cancerian friends and most can't cook, nor do they have the desire to. They love eating my cooking though.

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u know, i actually have no cancer friends because i have chiron in cancer and that squares my mars and mercury and it opposes my neptune so the aggravation, is amazing but trust me, my technique is foolproof!

posted November 21, 2010 11:54 PM              

u wouldn't believe it.. that is waaay out of character for me but it happens again and again! i have leo moon, see.. 0 degrees.. it's in conjunction with venus at 29 cancer.. my sun falls in the fifth in virgo with mercury in libra squaring chiron, neptune, opposing mars.. i'm usually pretty self contained and i don't create a spectacle unless i'm showing off but never is it a scene.

there was a girl that i knew when i was little who used to always try and sympathize with things she saw on tv.. like if a bad actor of a boy tripped and hurt his ankle, she would awww.. if it was a cartoon, she would do the same.. each and every time, it annoyed the living ish out of me, i can't explain it... she was a cancer.

posted November 22, 2010 12:06 AM            

I also have a nasty 12th house stellium in Libra consisting of Merc, Saturn and Pluto. It squares Cancer but I just wuv 'em Cancers!! Actually, all the signs that are supposed to treat me badly just do not, like Geminis who square my sun and Capricorns who square my 12th house stuff.

Humans just annoy me in general no matter what sign they are. I get along better with cats.

posted November 22, 2010 12:15 AM              

with the cardinals, i think im just screwed except w the libras.. jupiter trines my mercury and mc, (making a sextile to that venus and moon that oppose it) so the sun's in libra get the jupiter jovialness from me..

the capricorns? not so much... sometimes they're very slow.. not slow mentally but slow to move.. a-nn-o-ying!

aries? i have mars in aries.. i dunno how i feel about em.. the attraction is just very quick n then it's gone because i either don't get their undivided attention or feel as if im dealing with a kid..

the capricorn/cancer thing seems to be the trick for me because i behave towards capricorns in the same way just without the outbursts.

maybe i could introduce u to some of my people? i have eleventh house north node in pisces so i can easily meet a bunch of em though they tend to be flaky and scared of my pluto conj descendant..

posted November 22, 2010 12:26 AM            

Capricorn's aren't slow. They are careful. They want to make sure that they don't do something they will regret. So, it is a calculated slowness.

I love Mars in Aries because my Mars is Scorpio (same ruler) although Mars in Aries tends to be more impulsive than Mars in Scorpio. But, even that, it depends on what's happening in the chart. But, I generally like Aries anything. Yeah, being a Scorp AC, Jupiter and Mars - I hate their short attention span (in other words, I hate how they don't adore me all the time and only when it suits them. They should learn to be be obsessed a bit, those Aries people!!).

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maybe i could introduce u to some of my people? i have eleventh house north node in pisces so i can easily meet a bunch of em though they tend to be flaky and scared of my pluto conj descendant..

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posted November 22, 2010 12:27 AM            

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helloooooooooooo....... d-nial isn't just a river in the nile, seeleah.. duh!

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posted November 22, 2010 12:48 AM              

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(in other words, I hate how they don't adore me all the time and only when it suits them

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i remember i wanted to see an aries once but they just told me that day that i couldn't..

cuz they were gonna go off to the beach and play frisbee.. my reaction and everything ever since that day i think explains itself. auto-matic-loss-of-interest!