posted January 12, 2011 12:18 AM            

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Originally posted by blugrey:
Hmm... As someone who considered adoption (I'm only 21 and I didn't really have any support from my ex at that point in time and was scared) I cannot agree with your sentiment.. I find it terribly horrible (I was considering it and almost went through with it. I had the papers at my bedside in the hospital). Unless it's the most desperate situation I cannot see how it is helpful for either mother and child - I can tell that until I knew I was going to keep her, I felt like my insides were going to rip out. I literally felt like I was going insane because it hurt - physically hurt. I don't think you should risk that just because you are poor and/or some other non-reason. Of course adoption can be beautiful when they child cannot be physically and mentally taken care of well by their biological parents - but there is no 100% GOOD adoption. There is always pain for all involved, most especially the children. I do believe it is necessary in some cases, but I think most children who are not in danger shouldn't be adopted out. Of course I am not telling a mom what to do - but it's just ridiculously painful and horrible. I don't see the beauty in it any longer.

Sorry to disagree, but it was just the worst pain I've ever felt - more than childbirth, lol.

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posted January 12, 2011 06:50 AM            

All men are different, I think a lot of people have a really bad attitude to "other people's" children. Personally I can't see the big deal...they're a blessing not a burden.

In the UK it is more common now that a woman has at least one child to a different man and lots of men will willingly date and even settle down with a girl/woman that has kids.

Astrologically I would actually look for those who are a little bit Uranian..more unpredictable but more open to a "universal" family.

posted January 12, 2011 12:19 PM            

Jerry: Can I ask you a question totally unrelated to your career?

Rod: Oh, we gonna be friends now?

Jerry: What do you know about dating a single mother?

Rod: Oh I know plenty. I was raised by a single mother.

Jerry: Tell me, because it's been a month, and she's about to take another job in San Diego.

Rod: First, single mothers don't "date." They have been to the circus, you know what I'm saying? They have been to the puppet show and they have seen the strings. You love her?

Jerry: How do I know?

Rod: You know when you know. It makes you shiver, it eats at your insides. You know?

Jerry: No, I don't know.

Rod: Then you gotta have THE TALK.

Jerry: But I sure don't like that she's leaving.

Rod: Well, that ain't fair to her. A single mother, that's a sacred thing, man.

Jerry: The kid is amazing.

Rod: No. A real man does not shoplift the "pooty" from a single mom.

Jerry: I didn't "shoplift the pooty." We were thrown together and -- I mean it's two mutual people who -- Alright, I shoplifted the pooty.

Rod: Shame on you. Shame on you.

posted January 12, 2011 12:44 PM            

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Originally posted by blugrey:
More selective? Hm... I never thought so. I mean, of course I'd be selective if I wanted to get serious, but I don't think there is a point if you just wanna have some fun.

To me happy mom = happy child. I don't want to build up my kid as something that becomes like the center of my world and everything else depends on that. I feel it's too much of a burden that way (for both of us!). (I'm not just talking about relationships.) Yeah.... I know, I have a ton on my plate, especially since she's so young, but if I can fit something in that I want to do, I will do it if it doesn't effect her negatively. You gotta take care of yourself too! You just don't disappear into mommyhood and no longer exist as a single person, IMO. I just gotta keep up with everything too even though I am much busier, I am much happier to be well rounded. Maybe all the Gemini in my chart makes me this way. Haha!

Again different strokes for different folks.

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