posted June 12, 2011 05:20 PM            

Interestingly, when it comes to social interaction, I seem to be repeating a pattern. Now, on my own, individually I have a very strong personality. Strong as in: it's there, it has formed me and it is not going away.

Yet... when I contact others, it seems that I'm only one thing: a blank canvas.

I suppose there's no better way to describe it, unless perhaps "photo paper which is being printed". Yeah, in short: when in contact with others, my personality is gone and I am left with a blank slate. Every time I live with someone, or spend a lot of time with them, I seem to subconsciously or even unconsciously take over their quirks and habits in a record time. I also take over their emotions and EVEN possible mental illnesses - or at least the symptoms of them. I feel like I'm kind of like a medium in which others can see what they are really like. Like a mirror showing them what they see but might not realize... I know, it's hard to explain.

Now I know I'm highly sensitive and one of the symptoms is to be able to pick up on other's emotions and/or changes in their surroundings. But I always assumed it would not mean that the own personality temporary completely disappears for that. When I immerse into someone's life, I really do lose all sense of self!

It is, even if I say so myself being a Uranus 1st house type, freaky. Very freaky. I basically lose all my sense of self, seem as though I'm mirroring the other person and take over their behaviour and feelings. I don't know what to blame as it sounds so surreal to me, almost... Neptunian.

And the strange thing is that I always do that - at least, once I actively try to get an idea of what goes on in their minds. Instead of delving into someone's mind it seems like I become them.

Great for catching criminals, I've heard, but I find it strange all the same.

Does anyone else here experience the same thing? Do you think it's Neptunian? Because the only thing I could blame it on is that the ruler of my 7th house is in 1st which could also suggest that (rather than the partner being "part of" the self, a trophy or such, that the self becomes part of the partner... ) or simply my Neptune in 1st and my 12th house sun...

posted June 12, 2011 05:36 PM            

I really do have it with everyone though, it is incredibly hard to describe. It's not that I really give up myself for the good of my partner (as I would expect is very Libra-ish), my "self" just dissipates. Whether I like it or not, and I simply turn into this "mirror" thing against my own will. The "mirror" could be Libra, but the dissipating is something more Neptune-like to me, you know, barriers disappearing and surreal experiences and the likes...

posted June 12, 2011 05:57 PM            

quote:

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I really do have it with everyone though, it is incredibly hard to describe. It's not that I really give up myself for the good of my partner, my "self" just dissipates. Whether I like it or not, and I simply turn into this "mirror" thing against my own will.

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posted June 13, 2011 09:53 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Chaos:
Man, it seems, with what you've written, you just gave the interpretation of 12H Sun + 7H Moon + 1H Venus conj Neptune combination, yourself! You don't even need anyone's help for this one

And, yeah, ruler of 7th in 1st - that's it!

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Well, I do have my moments of clarity!

It is nice to have someone else to tell me whether I'm right or wrong, that's the only way I can learn that the theory or interpretation I come up with, hits home at least somewhere.

So... 7th house ruler in 1st house goes both ways, so? You can either use the partner as an extension of the self and be immersed in the partner's life yourself? Obviously, having a 7th house ruler in either 1st or 7th house would suggest something to do with the identity of someone either way

Funny thing is that my 7th house ruler is nowhere near Venus. It's Mercury - but it's conjunct the rising, and opposite the Moon in 7th!