posted September 29, 2011 08:37 AM            

My way of thinking started to change a few months earlier. I think now that if somebody needs my help or love etc, she/he should deserve it.. Because i had a terrible childhood in psychological, moral and spiritual way. I am gonna skip details(because it is too long) but i suffered a lot. Also my bad childhood is shown up in my chart(Moon in first house on ascendant getting 4 hard aspects and also chiron in cancer...)Anyway i went through a lof of loneliness, being played around, ignored, never granted wishes... But now i have nice psychique also good face, also money than average(i am close to rich) and important thing is people around me need me. After i discovered myself and capabilities of me, i started to embrace the philosophy of "without suffering and understanding value of what you have, you deserve nothing". From now on, i will not give even a small hint of me loving them until they earn it. A lot of people will need my love since i had them got used to my help and caring. I was like a crying wall. When a hearth is broken it comes to explain its problem etc.. Now No more healing hearths, no more providing supports both material and spiritual way.. if i had been rich enough, i would test people with less sadistic way of course to make them realize. People who has crush on me will suffer to unrequited love but i will always give them a small hope so they can continue to feel sth or hope sth(did it once).. Because i went through A LOT. Secondly, people who wants to do sth and afraid their environment and family comes to consult me. For example two weeks ago a girl came to about losing her virginity and i told her to lose it since it is not a big deal, it is old-minded protect it. After she lost it, she came to and told me with enthusiasm. I suddenly turned back on her and told her that you did wrong, you are gonna regret and you know he was not worth it.. She had noone to talk about since everybody around her was against it... I wanted her to go through it ALONE since i did with things in my past(not same ofc since i am man)...

Anyway any people who had achieved sth they desire without doing anything should suffer in my opinion. They are either lucky or universe will get it back. No pain, no gain. If someone deserved and worked hard to get sth, i reward him more or he/she must be rewarded more. I am doing for this to make people stronger and i am teaching to depend on ANYONE. By leaving people around me in lurch, i am helping to deserve and not to depend on me always. I am a pluto in 8th house(trine moon, sextile vertex) and Jupiter in 6th house person. I have excellent recuperative talents and i stand alone. I am lucky in health and survival. That is the only thing i have and from now on people should learn it as well.

From now on, i am STH TO BE DESERVED for the people who wants me, NOT A GIFT from Universe as if i was in the past!!!.

posted September 29, 2011 09:57 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by MertSerimer:
Nah, people always call me to hang out and stop by at my door when they were going somewhere else.(venus trine jupiter, Sun conjunct venus, moon on ascendant first house ). Sorry but i can't be alone even if i want to be. I think you don't know the definition of loneliness. Loneliness is not sth that you dont have anyone else near you, it is having NOONE TO UNDERSTANDS YOU. i have tons of friends maybe more than a thousands still i feel a lone.

But i will test from now on.

---

posted September 29, 2011 12:18 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by MertSerimer:
Loneliness is not sth that you dont have anyone else near you, it is having NOONE TO UNDERSTANDS YOU. i have tons of friends maybe more than a thousands still i feel a lone.

---

posted September 29, 2011 08:57 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by abcd efg:
Merti, nice to have you back. What's happening? Would you mind if i say a word or two?

---

Ofc you can say anything =)). It was very polite of you to say but since you are older and wiser you should tell!

posted September 29, 2011 08:59 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Lonake:

No I've been wanting to see the movie but haven't yet ~ this quote here sounds like Neptune to me.

---

posted September 29, 2011 09:25 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by RedScorp:
That's kind of jaded and cynical, or maybe...uh, what's the word...bitter? Something like that. I don't really approve...yo'.

---

Yeah, it seems kinda heartless to me too; then again deep down I am a bleeding heart Leo with a Cancer moon and singleton Neppy; despite having a pileup in air signs.

posted September 30, 2011 02:09 AM            

what is the purpose of this thread?
Is there any astrological observation or question I did not see?
Or did you just want to share your current view on life?

Astrologically I find it interesting that Tr Pluto is conjunct your Uranus. Where is Uranus placed and what house does it rule?
I found the Tr Saturn-natal Saturn interesting, too, but I am having it myself (Tr Saturn in my 10th house; natal Saturn in my 8th house and ruling the 2nd), and feel that it might have had a different effect on me.

posted September 30, 2011 05:29 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Ceridwen:
MertSerimer,

what is the purpose of this thread?
Is there any astrological observation or question I did not see?
Or did you just want to share your current view on life?

Astrologically I find it interesting that Tr Pluto is conjunct your Uranus. Where is Uranus placed and what house does it rule?
I found the Tr Saturn-natal Saturn interesting, too, but I am having it myself (Tr Saturn in my 10th house; natal Saturn in my 8th house and ruling the 2nd), and feel that it might have had a different effect on me.

---

posted September 30, 2011 05:41 AM            

I understand why you feel you owe no one anything, and that the world owes us nothing, and I do agree.

What worries me about this post is that you have taken this attitude to the extreme, where you are aware of the power you have over people, and are deliberately not acting in their best interests.
This hurts you, as well as them.

If you feel it is wrong to provide honest support and love to people because you feel they do no deserve it, then it is best you just step back from those people completely, rather than trying to manipulate them to serve your own purpose of revenge against those who mistreated you.

It is not healthy to make someone pay for another's mistake, and it merely perpetuates the cycle of abuse.

posted September 30, 2011 07:49 AM            

Im sorry you have been duped by people of the past but it is no reason to "test" people of the future.
...just keep them at a safe distance till they naturally prove themselves to you.

If I found out I was being tested for a friendship I would feel more like the "sidekick" of a gangster, a lesser person of the friendship.

Friendships are suppose to be equal.

posted September 30, 2011 10:09 AM            

Merti, if you have had too much on you lately it is wise to draw the line and reserve energy for yourself. Ebbing and flowing. To flow like a river from which hundreds can drink water and satisfy their thirst you have to get rejuvinated. It then becomes necessary to withdraw.

If its like say - a father and child interaction where he watches his son try to lift a 50 kg weight. Then his mom, who is somewhere in the vicinity, chips in and tells the dad in a whisper, "Don't be too harsh on him dear." To which he retorts, "When i was his age i could do it then why can't he? - then think twice because what you could tolerate in your life the other may not be constructed to. Here the heart of a mother and the firmness of a father is required. Use your sense of discretion here. DISCRETION is VERY IMPORTANT. When we have the best of the other person at heart our heart shows us the way.

And last, if you are finding yourself doing other persons' homework most of the time. And if you are that type of person then i would say you have reached a proper conclusion. Like parents who need to stay away from being crutches for their children. A shoulder to lean on is different. Be a shoulder to lean on by all means (again use your discreation here), and a crutch ONLY when the other person is limping, but that too only for SOMETIME. Some people still won't learn and make the same mistake consistently then let them manage without your crutch.

So now after having written three paras instead of one or two words, lol i will say good night and wish you good results for your new stand. Hope your wisdom guides you in the proper direction for the best, for yourself and those around you.

posted September 30, 2011 12:29 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by fairaqua:
Honestly I couldnt even get throught the whole message because it felt so negative.

Im sorry you have been duped by people of the past but it is no reason to "test" people of the future.
...just keep them at a safe distance till they naturally prove themselves to you.

If I found out I was being tested for a friendship I would feel more like the "sidekick" of a gangster, a lesser person of the friendship.

Friendships are suppose to be equal.

Now if this was an employee you were thinking of hiring it is another situation.

---

Yeah, honestly I had to do a 'quick skim' too because I could feel the dark energy oozing from the post.

I don't think it's anyone's place to play anyone else's judge jury and executioner, or disciplinarian. Especially when it's hypocritical because no one is perfect.

posted September 30, 2011 08:31 PM            

@abcd efg thanks for your labour and time. You know sometimes the wrong must be done in order to comprehnd right thing to do. Sometimes advices are not enough, sometimes person needs to do wrong to undertnd the advice. Also my call was instinctual maybe i will not be able to bring it far anyway... İ hope you are good and ok by the way

posted October 01, 2011 06:49 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by MertSerimer:
@Voix_de_le_mar and @fairaqua thank you for responses.

@abcd efg thanks for your labour and time. You know sometimes the wrong must be done in order to comprehnd right thing to do. Sometimes advices are not enough, sometimes person needs to do wrong to undertnd the advice. Also my call was instinctual maybe i will not be able to bring it far anyway... Ý hope you are good and ok by the way

---