Posts: 29
From: Cambria heights,NY
Registered: Jun 2011

posted October 04, 2011 09:24 PM            

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Ive been really close with this guy for a long time. We meet each other years ago. He has had feelings for me for a couple years ago. He asked to be exclusive over a year ago and I declined because I was going off to college and I was scared about losing a friendship!...Est then things we're slow BUT est March things have been great!

HERES THE "BAD" PART!
He has this one ex that he dated like 6 years, thats clearly obsessed with him!...She has yet to move on . She writes facebook notes about him saying she knew him first why is he with someone( he told her he seeing someone)...shes thinking about a masterplan to get him back!...Just this whole BIG rant she goes on consistently!

It makes me feel insecure moderately and angry!

Last week he said we have a great understanding that wish it leds else-where. I absolutely hates that he still communicates with this female knowing the deep feelings she has for him.

I posted this ? last week, but today she saw him and she writes on facebook. "A who she?" basically replacing the "A Girlfriend" with a " A who see?" It gets me mad at him, cause oviously hes doing something she likes for her to STILL be one him. Hes gonna call me tonight and part of me has an attitude because of this crazy ***** actions!

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Posts: 660
From: where the fun is
Registered: Mar 2011

posted October 05, 2011 05:02 AM            

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6 years is a lot of time to be together. I mean, the getting used to each other, the sharing they have done can't be erased or got rid of so easily. You must grant time a little, observe(not obsessively) and then act. Please dont fall for him too much now, after you have a clear understanding of where you are going together then you can do whatever you want.

Note: How do people achieve such long partnerships

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Posts: 133
From:
Registered: Feb 2011

posted October 05, 2011 09:41 AM            

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Im confused?
Are you dating the guy or not?

I have found guys will stay in touch with females to keep their ego "up".

If you are not dating him WHY does he have to stop talking to her?
Yeah, I can see where it would be polite of him if hes trying to court you to stop, but youve already told him No.

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Posts: 29
From: Cambria heights,NY
Registered: Jun 2011

posted October 06, 2011 09:29 PM            

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at Mert: I have to correct myself they dated 6 years ago...a short relationship. This female just blows me first last year she decided she wanted to be a lesbian...then this year she decides to want him back. He has told her he is basically interested in someone else, she still writes facebook notes saying shes gonna come up with a masterplan to get him back and she knew him first...just this big rant!

fair::I was 17 when I rejected him nicely, I was afraid about losing a great friendship if it didnt work, and I was leaving for college...I didnt think a long distance could work! Now im ready and he's always gives subtle hints about a relationship! I just dont want this girl in the picture if this should happen.. I dont mind him being platonic friends with someone/people from his past( if/when we date) BUT this girl is on a mission to try to take what is meant for me. ---btw we've known each other for almost 10 years

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Posts: 1668
From: Betty Boop Land
Registered: Sep 2010

posted October 07, 2011 03:09 AM            

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Personally - I would avoid her and the "subject" of her as though she never existed.

You can't give a person like this the time of day or give her FB comments importance.
Ignore her completely - it's really the best thing you could do imo

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Posts: 1668
From: Betty Boop Land
Registered: Sep 2010

posted October 07, 2011 03:10 AM            

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quote:

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this girl is on a mission to try to take what is meant for me.

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You prevent this from happening - by building a strong relationship *with* him.... not by focussing on her.

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Posts: 29
From: Cambria heights,NY
Registered: Jun 2011

posted October 08, 2011 12:17 AM            

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I meant to ask this too..After we chilled together he said " I believe our friendship has a great understanding...I believe it could lead else where"...after that akward silence he texted me this::
"It's never about me or you, it's always about us and I respect that about you.Speak so that you may be heard, and at the end of each day, we learn from each other!--What does this text mean?

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Posts: 536
From:
Registered: Jul 2010

posted October 08, 2011 12:45 AM            

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If he wanted her, he would be with her. A girl desperately throwing herself at a guy is hardly attractive. Who knows why he is talking to her still. People are complex and get weird ideas in to their heads about things they should do, and what's polite, etc. Maybe he doesn't want to stop talking to her because he's scared of her and afraid of telling her to back off. She does sound pretty creepy.

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Posts: 29
From: Cambria heights,NY
Registered: Jun 2011

posted October 08, 2011 07:21 AM            

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I was thinking the same thing but its fristrating sometimes and then a part of me thinks he entertains her bs to boost his ego idk...did u read my post before...about the text message?

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Posts: 676
From:
Registered: Jun 2009

posted October 08, 2011 09:49 AM            

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So what's wrong with some ego boosting?
I just imagined the situation and I'm standing here with a smile on my face - he, the cancer, you, the preety pisces and her - a scorpio who couldn't get over what happened six years ago.

My advice to you is to ignore her. And Cancers are afraid of rejection - if you already did that once, you should give pretty strong hints that right now you are interested in a relationship. Pisces can be vague, so make sure you step it up a bit.
Best of luck!

(the messages seem vague, only you can tell what he meant, since the friendship has been ongoing for so long and you know each other).

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Posts: 29
From: Cambria heights,NY
Registered: Jun 2011

posted October 08, 2011 09:30 PM            

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Thanks maira for the advice (pretty name btw). I know I feel bad that I rejected him the first time!

Btw she is a Leo lol

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