posted October 13, 2011 01:38 AM            

1. Check the natals for the same or complimentary themes:
For example: You have Moon in Pisces - he has Moon conjunct Neptune
A similiar theme would be highlighted for you.

A complimentary one would be if you have Moon in Pisces and he has Sun square Neptune.
(I would only count conjunction, opposition, and close squares and trines here).

Check for planets in sign/house/aspect
Example:
Sun in Sagittarius is similiar to Sun in 9th or Sun conjunct Jupiter (not exactly the same, but similiar enough)
Planets in the 1st house are also emphasised, so in this case Jupiter in 1st house would give a similiar vibe as well

1b) Check the conditions of each 5th, 7th and 8th house (sign at cusp, ruler in sign and house, planets in these houses) and how they "fit" together

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2. Check the synastry: see if natal themes are being repeated.
Let`s say in synastry his Neptune squares your Moon that would be a highlighted theme.

3. Check (in synastry) the angles and angle rulers aspecting Sun, Moon, ASC, IC, nodal axis and angle rulers (note in which houses the planets and angles/anglerulers are placed)
for romantic relationships the 7th house is of utmost importance

4. Check Venus, Mars, 5th and 8th house (for "sparks"); 7th house is more about partnership.

5. For past life interactions or deeply subconscious patterns you can check out the 12th house, planets in 12th house and the ruler of 12th house (for past lives the SN is quite revealing as well)

6. ALL waterhouses are indicative of deep emotional themes, so make a special note if in the synastric overlay significant planets (those which are involved in strong aspects) fall into or rule the waterhouses; even if the aspect is made by Saturn and Uranus, if they rule the 8th and 4th house they will ALWAYS have a strong emotional effect

notes:
° I mainly consider
1. conjunction and opposition
2. square and trine
(3. solstice points/ antiscion - but the jury is still out on these)

° there should be balance:
The connections involving 5th, 7th and 8th house seem to be of main importance for relationships. (the 4th house would be allimportant for a very deep emotional connection, but it`s not sexual; the 8th is actually both, deeply emotional and deeply sexual and plainly scary in terms of intensity and depth).

If only one person´s 5th, 7th and 8th house-connections (especially their ruler) aspect the other Sun, Moon, ASC, ruler of 1st or even 4th house, then we probably have a case of unrequited feelings at our hand (or at least a case where one feels more than the other).

If it goes both ways, good.

7. Check especially for challenging aspects of the personal planets Sun, Moon, Mercury, Venus, Mars, the angles and the ruler of 1st, 3rd, 4th, 5th, 7th and 8th house to Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, Pluto (and maybe Chiron).
These might relate to the "big issues", most likely karmic in nature and not easy to deal with, but in the end transformative.
challenges involving
Saturn: blockages, the "brake"
Uranus: unpredictibality, sudden changes, "on and off"
Neptune: dissolving, sometimes deluding others and oneself
Pluto: (subconscious) powerplays, very forceful
Jupiter: overindulgence (though even squares of Jupiter to Moon or Venus are usually quite joyful, you just have to keep an eye on the bankaccount now and then ).

8. Check also the harmonious aspects to the outer planets:
Jupiter can be endlessly supportive and your "biggest fan". Saturn can be stabilizing and structuring (which is needed in a relationship as well - commitment!).
Uranus can be liberating, inspiring and electrifying, giving you completely new ideas.
Neptune can be very compassionate, and loving in an allencompassing, unconditional sense (though Neptune`s love is more spiritual than personal, which often is the problem in a Venus-Neptune-aspect.)
Pluto can be intense and "rebuilding" you from the inside, baring your soul so you can strip away everything that is unreal, that is not "your truth". (it demands a bit of courage though).

9. Check for conjunctions to the nodal axis, South Node and North Node.
If there are only conjunctions to the SN without some to the NN, the connection might be passing away, you might have outlived its sell-date. (not my words, I read that in a book by Blashke and also in one by Hall).
if there are also conjunctions to the NN then you have a common path, no matter how long or short it will be.

posted October 13, 2011 01:41 AM            

aspects involving Venus, Mars, 5th and 8th house are more about "sparks"

posted October 13, 2011 06:12 AM            

quote:

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(Phew and that is only the short route to synastry).

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posted October 13, 2011 06:46 AM            

Moon - IC - 4th house: Intimacy

Saturn - MC - 10th house: Comitment (but not in the sense of emotional / romantic commitment, that probably would be more in the 7th house)

Venus, Mars, DESC, 7th house, 5th house: Romance and desire (passion)

(of course always in relation to Sun and ASC as well)

Nodes - Vertex: fate

4th - 8th - 12th house (and consequently aspects to Moon - Neptune- Pluto): deep complex emotional experiences, "soulmates"-feelings

always in relation to
Sun, Moon, Venus, Mars,
angles and their rulers

posted October 13, 2011 07:30 AM            

"The triangular theory of love is a theory of love developed by psychologist Robert Sternberg. In the context of interpersonal relationships, 'the three components of love, according to the triangular theory, are an intimacy component, a passion component, and a decision/commitment component'.[1]

Intimacy – Which encompasses feelings of attachment, closeness, connectedness, and bondedness.
Passion – Which encompasses drives connected to both limerence and sexual attraction.
Commitment – Which encompasses, in the short term, the decision to remain with another, and in the long term, the shared achievements and plans made with that other."

"Nonlove 'refers simply to the absence of all three components of love. Nonlove characterizes the large majority of our personal relationships, which are simply casual interactions'.[3]
Liking/friendship is 'used here in a nontrivial sense. Rather, it refers to the set of feelings one experiences in relationships that can truly be characterized as friendship. One feels closeness, bondedness, and warmth toward the other, without feelings of intense passion or long-term commitment'.[4]
Infatuated love: 'infatuation results from the experiencing of passionate arousal in the absence of intimacy and decision/commitment...like Tennov's limerance'.[5] Romantic relationships often start out as infatuated love and become romantic love as intimacy develops over time. Without developing intimacy or commitment, infatuated love may disappear suddenly.
Empty love is characterized by commitment without intimacy or passion. A stronger love may deteriorate into empty love. In an arranged marriage, the spouses' relationship may begin as empty love and develop into another form, indicating 'how empty love need not be the terminal state of a long-term relationship...[but] the beginning rather than the end'.[6]
Romantic love 'derives from a combination of the intimate and passionate components of love...romantic lovers are not only drawn physically to each other but are also bonded emotionally'[7] - bonded both intimately and passionately, but without sustaining commitment.
Companionate love is an intimate, non-passionate type of love that is stronger than friendship because of the element of long-term commitment. 'This type of love is observed in long-term marriages where passion is no longer present'[8] but where a deep affection and commitment remain. The love ideally shared between family members is a form of companionate love, as is the love between close friends who have a platonic but strong friendship.
Fatuous love can be exemplified by a whirlwind courtship and marriage - 'fatuous in the sense that a commitment is made on the basis of passion without the stabilizing influence of intimate involvement'.[9]
Consummate love is the complete form of love, representing an ideal relationship toward which people strive. Of the seven varieties of love, consummate love is theorized to be that love associated with the “perfect couple.” According to Sternberg, these couples will continue to have great sex fifteen years or more into the relationship, they cannot imagine themselves happier over the long-term with anyone else, they overcome their few difficulties gracefully, and each delight in the relationship with one other.[10] However, Sternberg cautions that maintaining a consummate love may be even harder than achieving it. He stresses the importance of translating the components of love into action. "Without expression," he warns, "even the greatest of loves can die".[11] Thus, consummate love may not be permanent. If passion is lost over time, it may change into companionate love."

Intimacy:
Moon - 4th house

Commitment:
Saturn - 10th house

posted October 13, 2011 07:36 AM            

- Moon - 4th house

Infatuated love: 'infatuation results from the experiencing of passionate arousal in the absence of intimacy and decision/commitment...like Tennov's limerance'.[5] Romantic relationships often start out as infatuated love and become romantic love as intimacy develops over time. Without developing intimacy or commitment, infatuated love may disappear suddenly.

- Venus - Mars - 5th house

Empty love is characterized by commitment without intimacy or passion. A stronger love may deteriorate into empty love. In an arranged marriage, the spouses' relationship may begin as empty love and develop into another form, indicating 'how empty love need not be the terminal state of a long-term relationship...[but] the beginning rather than the end'.[6]

- Saturn - 10th house

Romantic love 'derives from a combination of the intimate and passionate components of love...romantic lovers are not only drawn physically to each other but are also bonded emotionally'[7] - bonded both intimately and passionately, but without sustaining commitment.

- Moon - 4th house - Venus - Mars - 5th house

Companionate love is an intimate, non-passionate type of love that is stronger than friendship because of the element of long-term commitment. 'This type of love is observed in long-term marriages where passion is no longer present'[8] but where a deep affection and commitment remain. The love ideally shared between family members is a form of companionate love, as is the love between close friends who have a platonic but strong friendship.

- Moon - Saturn - 4th house - 10th house

Fatuous love can be exemplified by a whirlwind courtship and marriage - 'fatuous in the sense that a commitment is made on the basis of passion without the stabili

Venus - Mars - 5th house - Saturn - 10th house (though the descripition is also Uranian in nature)

posted August 03, 2013 08:30 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Ceridwen:
Sometimes I stumble over old threads and find myself thinking: Damn, I wrote this?

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I'm so glad you bumped this!