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Author
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Topic: Am I good enough for him?
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pandacake
Knowflake Posts: 321
From: Europe
Registered: May 2011
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posted December 03, 2011 03:05 PM
  
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mintgirl123
Knowflake Posts: 2393
From:
Registered: Nov 2009
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posted December 03, 2011 03:13 PM
You have to look at his moon, venus and juno. Since he has alot of it in aquarius, we can say in combo with virgo likes somebody who's independent, strong minded, intellectual...laid back and not overly emotional or over the top. He wants somebody who is opinionated and doesn't just conform, alittle more unique (in a good way). He wants somebody who he can feel comfortable and at home around, but at the same time, can be a friend to him too. Like somebody he can like genuinely as a person, as well as a gf. IP: Logged |
RegardesPlatero
Moderator Posts: 4366
From: Storybrooke, Mr. Gold's Shop
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted December 03, 2011 03:18 PM
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lalalinda
Moderator Posts: 2635
From: nevada
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 03, 2011 03:19 PM
Hello pandacake! Welcome to LL 
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FireWire
Knowflake Posts: 370
From:
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted December 03, 2011 03:20 PM
quote:
Originally posted by pandacake:
Hello  I really feel like I failed as a girlfriend because I was not able to help and cheer him up. He says he needs to find something worth living for and I will give him all the support, time and space he needs.
Not qualified to speak on the synastry per se, but don't look at yourself as a failure. It breaks my heart to read that. You clearly care for him, and that is so wonderful. Each of our souls has its own evolutionary path Pandacake. There is nothing wrong with you being a Libra. Nothing unfortunate about coming here to be the beautiful person you are! Be there to support him in a way that allows you both to draw strength from this wonderful experience of life you are sharing together. Him needing to find something worth living for is probably very challenging for him. Understand that this is part of his evolution, and ultimately a part of yours as well. But, do not feel you have failed him, you are not responsible for that. We come here, individually yet we intersect at points along our paths. The two of you are at a point of intersection (ie: the relationship), and he is at a critical point in his own evolutionary path. We are ultimately each responsible for our own happiness and finding what that is for us. I hope he finds his way, and I am wishing you both all the strength and love in the world! IP: Logged |
Fondue Knight
Knowflake Posts: 819
From: NY
Registered: Nov 2011
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posted December 03, 2011 03:21 PM
As my spirit animal RuPaul always says, "If you can't love yourself, how the hell are you gonna love anybody else?" He needs to work through his depression for himself and it has no bearing on whether or not you are "good enough." IP: Logged |
RegardesPlatero
Moderator Posts: 4366
From: Storybrooke, Mr. Gold's Shop
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted December 03, 2011 03:21 PM
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FireWire
Knowflake Posts: 370
From:
Registered: Sep 2011
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posted December 03, 2011 03:24 PM
quote:
Originally posted by RegardesPlatero:
Depression is a mental/emotional health issue that is much, much bigger than the person who has it and the people who love him/her. Please, don't blame yourself. It is NOT your fault. This is a demon that he has to face. It doesn't come from you, and you are not responsible. I hope that he will experience healing and peace as he continues on the road to recovery.
Beat me to it! Precisely! IP: Logged |
pandacake
Knowflake Posts: 321
From: Europe
Registered: May 2011
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posted December 03, 2011 04:04 PM
Thank you so much for all your kind words, it really means a lot to me.I promise I won't let him give up and will do the very best I can to support him and be there for him, I'm sure there will be sunshine behind those dark clouds. Thanks you guys! xx
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Capriquarius
unregistered
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posted December 03, 2011 05:34 PM
Your Sun "lights up" his empty 12th House of repressed psychological issues, which is unfamiliar territory for him. He feels inexplicably mystified by you, and probably vulnerable. Both of you are experiencing Saturn transiting your 1st Houses, which is a depressing and bleak transit. It will be there until around December 2013....I don't know the exact date because the charts don't show the degrees of the House cusps. However, his Sun activates your nurturing side since it "lights up" your 4th House (which pertains to the maternal) and your Venus falls in his 12th, which should be a great comfort for him through a tough time when you are both re-defining your identities. Your angles are almost aligned with each others', so you will be experiencing the same areas of life being highlighted as the transiting planets enter and exit each house. This is very important in a relationship, isn't it? Love is about looking in the same direction, amongst other things. This in addition to your both being Air signs provides a basis of understanding and compatibility he won't find with a Virgo. The Aquarian soul needs a lover who is also a best friend. His North Node is in his 5th, so he may pursue something to express his creative urge. Your NN is in the 6th House, so you will find yourself with a tendency towards mastering day-to-day things and maybe a healthy lifestyle. The 6th House is also the house of service though, so try not to fall into the trap of becoming his secretary/means of support while he has fun (5th House). Because you are more than good enough for him. You will always be wanted around by others because Libras are pleasant. HTH! IP: Logged |
Malena
Knowflake Posts: 237
From:
Registered: Apr 2011
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posted December 03, 2011 05:40 PM
quote:
Originally posted by pandacake:
He will be undergoing therapy for depression next week. I really feel like I failed as a girlfriend because I was not able to help and cheer him up.
Oh sweetie, my heart goes out to you. Depression is an illness of the brain, in the same way asthma is an illness of the lungs or ulcers are an illness of the stomach. If your boyfriend developed asthma, that would not be your fault or your failure. In the same way, depression means the chemicals in his brain are acting a certain way. You don't control those chemicals. Please don't beat yourself up. IP: Logged |
Lonake
Moderator Posts: 8748
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted December 03, 2011 10:40 PM
As someone mentioned he has Saturn crossing his ASC and actually, right now, transit Saturn is squaring his natal Mercury EXACT, so his mind from what it sounds like is under some serious blockages. His head is at a space where he can't imagine anything getting better for him. It will pass, but Saturn is gonna be in late Libra for the next yr or so. To add to that, he also has transit Pluto conj natal Saturn in his 3rd, so he is being challenged to obliterate every self-imposed boundary he has. Saturn in the 3rd natally is a marker for depression all by itself, he's likely a deep thinker, but may find it sometimes difficult to express to others. His natal Saturn, thankfully, isn't strongly afflicted, at all, so this is a temporary feeling of being misunderstood/feeling isolated/mental block. It will pass. He may be going through some changes now or in the next yr to his home or family structure that he finds difficult to accept. After the yr passes his thinking on these matters will be changed, but to undergo this change he will be under a depression which will basically wash away an outmoded way of thinking. He may have to accept new responsibilities that he may difficult to shoulder and may feel alone, or unwilling to reach out. Basically, he's just growing up. IP: Logged |
Malena
Knowflake Posts: 237
From:
Registered: Apr 2011
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posted December 03, 2011 11:14 PM
You did not fail as a girlfriend. It breaks my heart to read that. On a non-astrological note, depression often has its roots in biochemistry. It's an illness of the brain just like asthma is an illness of the lungs. If your boyfriend developed asthma, would that be your fault as his gf? No! In the same way, you can't control the biochemical processes that may be happening in his brain. I wish both of you healing and peace. IP: Logged |
lindisfarne
Knowflake Posts: 1108
From: she doesn't know that i left my urge in the icebox
Registered: Oct 2011
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posted December 03, 2011 11:20 PM
Op, why are you with this life sucker?
He needs help. It's not your job to make him happy.
Don't feel bad either...IP: Logged |
Capriquarius
unregistered
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posted December 03, 2011 11:26 PM
quote:
Originally posted by lindisfarne:
Op, why are you with this life sucker?
He needs help. It's not your job to make him happy.
Don't feel bad either...
^ lol Panda, this is probably the most time-saving and optimal advice but you're probably going to learn from your own mistakes like most people have to.Good luck
P.S. The best piece of dating advice I ever heard: "Do nothing. If you like what he does, stay. If you don't, leave." A real time-saver.
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pandacake
Knowflake Posts: 321
From: Europe
Registered: May 2011
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posted December 04, 2011 04:30 PM
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Lindaland
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