posted February 14, 2012 02:00 PM            

It took me a year to get over him even though we never even did anything. Then suddenly out of the blue during a chat I could feel that he was coming on strong, although it wasn't actually SAID, I can just feel what he wants. After a few chats it became clear that something has changed. At first I thought maybe he finally broke up with her. But when asked he said no. I have learned not to push him too much with ultimatums etc. and our communication has been very clear. He said that he is open to me asking him questions though, (normally he doesn't like 'being put on the spot' as he calls it) but he said he's willing to be honest. I asked him if he wanted us to keep things strictly platonic, and he said he knows he SHOULD but that that would be a lie.

So of course I mention the possibility of a Liason which is something I feel horrible about but we had to consider it. He said he thought about it too (and by Liason practically that would prob mostly involve internet interactions and maybe seeing him once or twice a year which became obviously ridiculous once I gave it some thought). So we dicided to take a few weeks out and seriously think about it. I have since come to the decision that there is no way that I would do it, the Scorpio sun and Aquarius Asc in me prob found the idea of it exciting or interesting but I (think) I really love him and I have a big thing about the 'sisterhood' so the only way I would ever be with him is if he broke up with her, or she was open to the possibility of a non-monogamous arrangement.

Anyways, sorry that this is so long. I have been trying to learn as much as possible about Astrology, for years now, but it peaked in the last two years, and perhaps I just want some insight into his mind/heart. I haven't told him yet about my decision not to go through with it and perhaps I just want to make sure that I am able to walk away from this without a torn out heart.

Mostly I'm ok, but I'm extremely curious to get some more insight into what this AMAZING connection is we have and if it can be found in our charts. It is so strong that weeks before he contacts me when he's more 'interested' my nails inexplicably start growing even, and my mystical (Pisces Moon) visions go through the roof!

Anyways. For anyone interested (I would appreciate a sounding board through the time to come)but certainly dont' expect it of course ...
Our charts are:
Obviously all the same houses, with Aquarius being first house.

I'm Sun, Mercury and Uranus in 10th Scorpio
Moon in Pisces 2nd
Venus, Jupiter and Saturn in Libra, 9th
Mars in 11th, Sag

He's got Sun, Moon and Venus in Virgo, 8th
Mars and Jupiter in Scorpio, 10th
Mercury and Saturn in Libra, 9th

Thanks. I would really appreciate any insight. Mostly I'm interested in figuring out whether this man is worth waiting for, and whether perhaps it is that he wants a sure thing, so he doesn't want to leave his GF without knowing that it would for sure be better with me.
Or, whether his scorpio Mars is actually just dabbling in what he thinks might be an illicit relationship but then he doesn't know me very well cos although I officially 'considered' it, it's so not my style and would never do it.

p.s We've only had three sexy interactions online in the two years we've known each other, so please understand that I'm not some kind of home wrecker or something.

posted February 14, 2012 02:57 PM            

It's taken me this long to reach a very simple conclusion that most women know instinctively (but not me, for some reason). That conclusion is (and this has been drummed into my head by girlfriends and a few psychics I've consulted)... ready for it?

If you are meant to be together "that way", the Universe will make it happen - against all odds. However, he has to end it completely with the girlfriend, before that can happen in a way that is not a violation of Universal laws. Since he seems to be stuck in a holding pattern for whatever the reason, you should get on with your life and ask the Universe to send you someone who is just as wonderful and exciting and available. You cannot wait years, you should not!!!!

And you need to get HIM out of your thoughts and fantasies, because that will actually interfere with the next great thing that's coming your way.

There are people with whom we have unbelievable energy and telepathy even, yet we cannot be with them, for reasons we might never know. I had some crazy energy with the guy I mentioned above. So crazy that it took hold of me for four years. And where am I now? Not with him. Because he's still with her.

posted February 14, 2012 04:35 PM            

is that you
feel attracted to that you cant have...you want to contol what you dont have control over

posted February 14, 2012 05:16 PM            

Do you have venus square neptune by any chance?

Basic astrology forum, How to approach Synastry http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum12/private-jjLYZw161/HTML/000667.html
when you get this chart, please also post the *pdf file*, above left should be *view additional tables (PDF)* This will bring up the aspect grid –at a glance planet to planet. Post the whole PDF file, what we are looking for if scroll down to ‘partner comparison’ aspect grid

posted February 14, 2012 05:27 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by RunAroundScreaming:
Jerk. I have no sympathy for people like that. He's obviously just stringing you along. It's not that hard to make a decision between choosing one of two people. And if anything, if he breaks up with her, he could get back together with her later. He just wants to string you along. Most men suck and want to have lots of women so they can increase the size of their ego. He's just a jerk. Forget him. He doesn't love you, or else he would feel really bad about the way you must feel being second to somebody else like this. That's wrong.

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posted February 14, 2012 05:31 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by anongrl10:
Although I don't necessarily agree that "most men suck", I agree with RAS that he isn't treating you right by suggesting anything like this to you.
I know you feel a connection. If you weren't, you wouldn't be giving him a chance. But I say let him sweat it out. Let him chase you if he really wants you. Why offer him the whole pie and the dog full?
That he even considers this is disgusting. Don't let him lead u on. You deserve an available man who is 100%
yours and crazy about you and only you.

---

LOL really? Men suck? Hahaha I guess males need to smarten up and grow up!

posted February 15, 2012 09:53 AM            

I'll just reply to a few responses here quick:
@chocogold > I'm actually not like that at all. Although I am theoretically liberal in terms of relationships, I am 'till death do us part' kind of girl, so not getting someone just frustrates me. Not my kindof thing. But I am also aware of the nitty gritty of relationships and how it's often not that romantic in the bright light of day, so thanks for the reminder anyway.

@RunaroundScreaming > haha cool name. To be honest, for the last year and a half we have been strictly platonic, so, if he's not getting sex from me, then why would he string someone along, or what for? Besides, stringing someone along is like kind of making promises, and he's never made any promises. He's only been honest the few times that I've directly questioned him about our connection which he admits is something very strange and unusual for him too. Unless that is a lie too, but I just don't see what the benefit here is for him either really. But you are right regarding that he should be sensitive about how this is on me, and for the most part I think he is, but when we have 'the talk' soon, I guess I'll find out the truth.

@anongirl > thanks lady. Thing is, if I was just looking for a relationship, that would be sound advice. However, I'm not, at least in this present incarnation so much concerned with that. Rather, my interest in 'relationships' and by this any sort of relating, has far more to do with what it does to my soul, what it makes me see, how I am forged in the fires of transformation. So something like 'love' (and I could be wrong) but that is essentially not my goal really. To UNDERSTAND love, now THAT is more aligned to what I resonate with. For that reason I also see this experience as a learning curve, where the 'goal' is not as simple as just 'getting someone' .... There cannot really be a goal, unless that goal is self-knowledge, and painful, confusing and difficult situations are when we surely learn the most (at least us Scorpios). Anyways, I do think a bit of a 'stewing' will do him good. I just don't want to play *** for tat mind games, I want to be honest, and real.

Thanks to everyone else so far too.

So anyways >>>>>>>> I think what I'm really looking at is understanding the attraction, because once I can understand, it's easy for me to put it in a place, nicely labelled and move on. Haha.

Ehm I will try and put up the charts as soon as I can. Thanks for the suggestion. SaggiMC

To me it seems that his Mars and Jupiter in scorpio, our shared midheaven, and the fact that his Virgo is 8th house which is normally Scorpio's are the most obvious connections I can see so far. Also the opposite moon signs of Virgo and Pisces. Oh and the same ASC?

By the way for the chinese astrology, I am a metal monkey, he is a water dog (usually only loyal to one master)

I guess only time will tell how it turns out. I don't think things are ever that simple, especially when considering that we are often bound to different people through karmic contracts from previous incarnations (I do believe that). For example, perhaps he has a karmic contract with her, or I with him, or all three of us somehow. However of course it doesn't mean that the reason is often clear OR simple, OR what we WANT it to be by any means.

So I can only inform myself as much as possible, to the best of my ability do what I feel is morally right whilst keeping in mind that each individual, more often than not, is actually trying their best. I don't actually believe that people are just cruel for no reason, however I'm open to admit that some might be beyond my help.