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Author
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Topic: Loser Epiphanies...
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appleberry
Knowflake Posts: 673
From:
Registered: Jun 2011
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posted April 02, 2012 06:12 PM
  
>>>>>I'm trying to think of what kind of astrological progression (or whatever else) might have happened?This kind of situation has happened several times to me... The same scenario-- I build up my partners egos ALWAYS (that's just who I am), then they seem to think they can do better than me so they break up with me, then I long for them/the relationship, then I get over them (sometimes it takes a year or longer) and realize what a loser they really were and I was lucky to get out without children at least, then they realize I was the best thing they ever had and they come back wanting to be together again, but all I can see at that point is loser! I remember the first one... he broke up with me, I longed for him... then about a year later he comes back and says he wants to marry me, that he made a mistake and I literally started laughing... cuz by then I thought he was such a loser and I guess he finally realized that he lost the best catch he was ever going to get in his life... If you look at my charts below, at this point, I have just come to see my ex 'Spider' as a LOSER!, and I suspect it won't take long for him to come back to me if he follows the same pattern... I get the feeling it will... ------------------
Charts about me and my partner, if you want to look: http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum23/HTML/000306.html IP: Logged |
Doux Rêve
Moderator Posts: 1622
From:
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted April 02, 2012 06:32 PM
Aw I'm sorry this keeps happening to you, appleberry.
I think it may have to do with tUranus near your DSC and tSaturn on your Uranus.. Especially since Uranus is your 5th house ruler.
Oh, and tNeptune and tChiron in your 5th! Ouch.
It seems that people often attract losers these days, probably because they're around every corner 
But don't despair girl! 
Things will eventually get better. 
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appleberry
Knowflake Posts: 673
From:
Registered: Jun 2011
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posted April 02, 2012 06:48 PM
Gosh... a lot of things for me to think about!I wonder if it is a transit though because the first time this happened was in the late 90's, then again in 2001, again in 2007, and now in 2012. I'm only speaking of significant relationships. I have had some decent relationships in between with guys who, although I don't think we are a good pair anymore, I don't see them as losers the way I see these guys. IP: Logged |
Doux Rêve
Moderator Posts: 1622
From:
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted April 02, 2012 06:51 PM
You have Chiron in the 7th natally, that could explain it some, I guess.IP: Logged |
Lonake
Moderator Posts: 6961
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 02, 2012 08:12 PM
Aries Sun on DSC - all about the partner, forgetting about yourself, emphasis is on sharing but you partner w.selfish individuals
Sun opp Pluto - you have power but you're giving it all away in building up the partner, maybe you received neg. msgs earlier about being demanding, or dad was a bully and that kept you from asserting yourself
Sun/Pluto sq Saturn - the "loser" issue, it represents your own lack of worth, they come back when you've regained some confidence/self esteem.Sun & Saturn both relate to the father so there might be something residual there w.him re:abandonment or loss.
Mars opp Neptune - since Mars is DSC ruler + it stands for the male + it's dispositor of Aries Sun - there's some issue re:not seeing the partners v.clearly, some problem you have w.reality, maybe others distrust your motives. The issue w.the father is called in once again since Mars rules the Sun, and it's impacting your relations w.men. So figure out what dad did and patch up the issue, come to terms with it in an adult way. Because it's gonna keep clouding the issue you have w.men in general. IP: Logged |
Faith
Knowflake Posts: 824
From:
Registered: Jul 2011
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posted April 03, 2012 09:46 AM
I was going to say, my best friend has the same story. Over and over again...she devotes herself to her boyfriends, they break up with her for some stupid reason, she recovers, and every single one of them comes back later, often with marriage offers. (Although I am wondering about this last one, a Leo. He might be the first to not return, just because Leos typically don't.)Anyway, her sun's in Pisces, not far from yours in Aries, and she also has a Pisces Mercury. I'm wondering about that Pisces Mercury...my friend is SO understanding, guys start to take advantage of that, and then they don't like themselves. Or so it seems to me.
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appleberry
Knowflake Posts: 673
From:
Registered: Jun 2011
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posted April 03, 2012 01:22 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Lonake:
Aries Sun on DSC - all about the partner, forgetting about yourself, emphasis is on sharing but you partner w.selfish individuals Sun opp Pluto - you have power but you're giving it all away in building up the partner, maybe you received neg. msgs earlier about being demanding, or dad was a bully and that kept you from asserting yourself Sun/Pluto sq Saturn - the "loser" issue, it represents your own lack of worth, they come back when you've regained some confidence/self esteem. Sun & Saturn both relate to the father so there might be something residual there w.him re:abandonment or loss. Mars opp Neptune - since Mars is DSC ruler + it stands for the male + it's dispositor of Aries Sun - there's some issue re:not seeing the partners v.clearly, some problem you have w.reality, maybe others distrust your motives. The issue w.the father is called in once again since Mars rules the Sun, and it's impacting your relations w.men. So figure out what dad did and patch up the issue, come to terms with it in an adult way. Because it's gonna keep clouding the issue you have w.men in general.
Well, correct... I had a terrible father... divorce, neglect, by the time I was 16 I refused to ever talk to him again... at this point I have no idea where he even lives... Fixing this problem... I don't even know where to start... if it means bringing him back into my life... that is not going to happen... I guess I do partner with selfish individuals. I've wondered if it is a feeling of 'completion' since the majority of my personal planets are within the 5th and 7th that I look to fill the other houses but they are often in the selfish areas in partner charts. I would agree that I don't see my partners clearly. And yes, people often don't trust me when they absolutely should. They tend not to see who I really am clearly.
...sigh...
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Doux Rêve
Moderator Posts: 1622
From:
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted April 03, 2012 01:24 PM
(((appleberry))) 
Stay strong, girl! You're not alone!
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appleberry
Knowflake Posts: 673
From:
Registered: Jun 2011
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posted April 03, 2012 01:31 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Faith:
I was going to say, my best friend has the same story. Over and over again...she devotes herself to her boyfriends, they break up with her for some stupid reason, she recovers, and every single one of them comes back later, often with marriage offers. (Although I am wondering about this last one, a Leo. He might be the first to not return, just because Leos typically don't.)Anyway, her sun's in Pisces, not far from yours in Aries, and she also has a Pisces Mercury. I'm wondering about that Pisces Mercury...my friend is SO understanding, guys start to take advantage of that, and then they don't like themselves. Or so it seems to me.
Never thought about Pisces Mercury but maybe I should look into it more... it's also close conjunct Jupiter... My asteroid Pax is conjunct these two as well... IP: Logged |
appleberry
Knowflake Posts: 673
From:
Registered: Jun 2011
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posted April 03, 2012 02:05 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Doux R�ve:
You have Chiron in the 7th natally, that could explain it some, I guess.
Yes... I think that is a huge part of it... so... I guess I will be forever dealing with this... And thank you Universe for putting it right there conjunct my moon and Cupido... 
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Doux Rêve
Moderator Posts: 1622
From:
Registered: Dec 2010
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posted April 03, 2012 02:30 PM
It can't be that bad, appleberry!My sister has Chiron in the 7th too, near her DSC if I remember well, and she's been in a relationship with a decent guy for a year now, and things are going well. The fact that it conjuncts your Moon makes you even more sensitive, especially in relation to your partner, and you may feel compelled to try and heal them or want to be healed by them.
But either way, don't despair, all right?
I know times can be tough but you're a great woman so things will eventually get better, for sure.
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Lonake
Moderator Posts: 6961
From:
Registered: Apr 2009
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posted April 03, 2012 03:32 PM
The Sun is in a pretty close opp to Pluto, which seems pretty final, so I understand the not wanting to get in contact w.him & the pain involved. I meant more to just be conscious of things w.dad coming back and messing up relationships w.men. Dad did this & it was rotten, but maybe they're not all like that & maybe the men have good sides too, sides that you'll see when you let them see the great things about you. Do you know what I mean? Like I have Sun sq.Uranus/Moon sq.Pluto & after my mom died my dad was out screwing around & would leave for wks at a time, no one knew where he was. So at present, well, I need space, that's how I deal with it, and I partner w.sort of eccentric types like myself (and yea I'm not great w.long term relationships but maybe one day haha). There's something inside that says 'you know this isn't going to last.' But that's my reality, that's my past coming back. So I just let the other person show me who they are, instead of assuming right away that I know how it's going to end.You can partner w.powerful types (Sun/Saturn/Pluto) just don't lose yourself to them, that's what I'm saying. There's good & there's bad in every combo. Maybe read up more on the Pluto/ASC cos that's a powerful combo in the chart. Blessings  Oh, I also want to say that there are some amazing Aries type men out there! They're not all selfish and rotten, they're boyish, romantic, athletic, courageous, masculine, sweet. I've dated some, I had good experiences. I know that the basic stereotype for Aries is pretty bad, but maybe once you own some positive Aries traits, like being enterprising, enthusiastic, ahead of the pack, you know, take back the projection, point out how amazing you are as a good Aries would, my opinion is things will be a lot better for you. Maybe balancing the Libra/Aries axis is the way to go? I'm just throwing things out there at this point, but I feel strongly that Aries is not all bad. IP: Logged |
appleberry
Knowflake Posts: 673
From:
Registered: Jun 2011
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posted April 08, 2012 07:22 PM
Thanks for your insights, they were pretty amazing.I will read more about what you said...
My dad has been gone so long that it's hard to understand why he's such an impact. My parents have been divorced since I was 3. I haven't spoken to or seen him in over 15 years. I think I am a disaster at things regarding relationships. I honestly believe that I will never be involved in a lasting one... I just can't seem to learn. I think the one I am in right now is failing... I can't even understand why. IP: Logged |
Ami Anne
Moderator Posts: 30476
From: Pluto/house next to NickiG
Registered: Sep 2010
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posted April 08, 2012 07:26 PM
quote:
Originally posted by appleberry:
Thanks for your insights, they were pretty amazing.I will read more about what you said...
My dad has been gone so long that it's hard to understand why he's such an impact. My parents have been divorced since I was 3. I haven't spoken to or seen him in over 15 years. I think I am a disaster at things regarding relationships. I honestly believe that I will never be involved in a lasting one... I just can't seem to learn. I think the one I am in right now is failing... I can't even understand why.
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appleberry
Knowflake Posts: 673
From:
Registered: Jun 2011
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posted April 09, 2012 02:02 AM
quote:
Originally posted by Doux Rêve:
It can't be that bad, appleberry!My sister has Chiron in the 7th too, near her DSC if I remember well, and she's been in a relationship with a decent guy for a year now, and things are going well. The fact that it conjuncts your Moon makes you even more sensitive, especially in relation to your partner, and you may feel compelled to try and heal them or want to be healed by them.
But either way, don't despair, all right?
I know times can be tough but you're a great woman so things will eventually get better, for sure.
I would love to be in a healthy long term relationship right now with someone I was attracted to and cared about...
I guess I just ended with someone 2 days ago cuz he doesn't want to take long distance seriously... I guess I can't blame him...
You're totally right about the sensitivity and wanting to heal... I'm exactly like that... And of course I would love for them to heal me...
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lilithpluto
Knowflake Posts: 792
From: pluto
Registered: Dec 2011
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posted April 09, 2012 02:18 AM
I feel you lady. .I too hv aries in 7th house n the tUranus is causing problems in rship. Demanding partners, yeah lady, absolutely. Do they come running back? Definately! Do i take them back? I hven't so far yet. Look on bright side, best to hv this when young than when we r settled down married with kids n this uncertainties wreak havoc in our lives then. 
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