posted July 18, 2012 02:56 PM            

ive been suffering from too much internal, sithering anger from within since many days and i have tried meditation, swimming etc to try and counter it, its lessend but its still there. i havent been able to let go of all the bad experiences i have been put thru at collg and school and somtimes even when im sitting with nothin on my mind i muter abuses and boil from within. i also have a veryyy intense nature and people kind of avoid me saying they get "negative vibes" from me. although i dunno if it is really negative sincei also attract attention veryy easily and stand apart from the crowd. its just the way it is i dunno why i attract that much attention. although im not a bad human being. im just always aching for somebody to understand me. since i kno i am capable of giving a 100% to anybody. also i have this thing that i push myself too hard at anything i do , im very passionate coz i just wanna be the best at watever i do. i cant take position number 2 in anyyything. thats bad i kno.

however ppl eventually cut me off. and wen i get too angry i can do anything. im scared of myself. otherwise in general my usual demeanour is calm and kind of reserved more like a sithering dark scorpion demeanour.

i dunno why im so internaly in a rage. i appear outwardly supercalm but within i am boiling with this unwilted energy and rage that can be triggered easily. i also attract ppl alot. since appearance wise im quiet tall, slim and attractive.

please help me in dealing with all d negative vibes. i feel socially awkward. im intense. and also have too much rage within due to all the injustice i have gone thru.

here are my details

Zodiac in degrees 0.00 Placidus Orb:0
Sun Aquarius 23.52 Ascendant Virgo 24.40
Moon Taurus 19.09 II Libra 23.19
Mercury Capricorn 28.25 III Scorpio 23.47
Venus Aquarius 11.07 IV Sagittarius 24.40
Mars Taurus 13.57 V Capricorn 25.24
Jupiter Taurus 27.00 VI Aquarius 25.42
Saturn Capricorn 10.17 VII Pisces 24.40
Uranus Capricorn 4.02 VIII Aries 23.19
Neptune Capricorn 11.26 IX Taurus 23.47
Pluto Scorpio 15.12 Midheaven Gemini 24.40
Lilith Libra 0.32 XI Cancer 25.24
Asc node Pisces 4.52 XII Leo 25.42

Planet Aspect Planet Orb/Value
Sun Square Moon 4.43 -37
Sun Square Jupiter 3.08 -50
Sun Trine Midheaven 0.48 63
Moon Conjunction Mars 5.12 79
Moon Conjunction Jupiter 7.51 157
Moon Trine Neptune 7.43 5
Moon Opposition Pluto 3.58 -218
Moon Trine Ascendant 5.31 36
Mercury Trine Jupiter 1.25 107
Mercury Trine Ascendant 3.45 43
Venus Square Mars 2.49 -48
Venus Square Pluto 4.04 -39
Mars Trine Saturn 3.40 57
Mars Trine Neptune 2.31 38
Mars Opposition Pluto 1.15 -127
Jupiter Trine Ascendant 2.20 35
Saturn Conjunction Uranus 6.15 158
Saturn Conjunction Neptune 1.09 319
Uranus Conjunction Neptune 7.24 52
Neptune Sextile Pluto 3.45 5
1154 -519 635