posted September 09, 2012 08:50 AM            

I'm somewhat new to astrology but it's always fascinated me so I thought I'd share here and see if any of you can see any connections between what I'm struggling with and my astrology.

My name is Kennedy (male), I was born April 19th, 1990 at 8.21pm in Box Hill, Victoria, Australia.

Due to a lot of family and personal issues over the last ten years or so, I've found myself struggling with a very deep depression. I've recently sought out a therapist which is bringing out a great deal of bad old memories and feelings I've neglected to deal with over the years.

This depression has been present for as long as I can remember but in the last five years its severity has become more and more apparent. I've been struggling with suicidal thoughts (and a few scattered attempts), I'm very anxious and more recently have been having panic attacks. As an Aries, my natural personality is outgoing, motivated and (probably from my Taurus cusp) logical which is why this anxiety, depression and hopeless unhappiness is such a foreign concept to me.

Most of this links back to my severe bulling through my school years and dealing with my very abusive alcoholic father for so many years. When I was eighteen, I cut my father out of my life but since and I have no doubt I made the right decision by doing so but it's left me in a place on overwhelming unhappiness. I'm desperate to find some peace but I seem to keep hitting brick walls when it comes to improving my state of mind.

Any suggestions or thoughts would be greatly appreciated and please feel free to ask me any questions if you need more information.

Thanks so much!

posted September 09, 2012 09:33 AM            

This aspect means that your emotions are often so intense that you seem to be at their mercy. When you are with people you like a lot, you easily become jealous and you may try to control those you love for fear of losing them. Of course, that is the fastest way to lose them, so you should try to trust the people you love and let them be.

You will go through several critical times when you very much need understanding and support from your family and friends. These emotional crises may seem to pull you apart, but they are stages in your inner growth that will help you become better, wiser and more mature.

Venus in the Fourth House 4th hs

You like your surroundings to be comfortable, pleasant, elegant and gracious. As you get older you may collect art or other objects to beautify your home.

Being loved by your parents is more important to you than to others. Probably you will receive all the warmth and affection that you need from them. But if your relationship with either or both of your parents is difficult, you will be more hurt psychologically than most people would.

Mercury Opposition Pluto

Mercury in the Sixth House 6th hs

Your critical mind quickly figures out how any situation could be improved. However, be careful not to be so critical that you see only flaws. Use your critical ability to improve things, not to tear them down.

Most of your problems stem from a difficult childhood and a powerful 12th house pluto in scorpio, but you have several positive aspects in your chart. I advise you to get out of your house and start exercising(something your Sun sextile Mars really wants you to do anyway) and focus on the positive. You're using your pluto and moon to emotionally fixate on the past. Focus on building a brighter tommorrow, and you'll be fine.

I also suggest you interprete your own chart at astro.com.

posted September 09, 2012 09:43 AM            

Knowing a bit about psychology, just about to be graduating with my bachelors, I can say that in psychology the father is considered very important. Having left your father was a very good thing for you....before he could do any more harm to your psyche! but unfortunately it's a temporary fix because your feelings towards him and the way he treated you still remain. It would be ideal for you to resolve your issues with your father by getting closer to him rather than running away from your relationship. Psychology says that even when you leave a parent's side, your feelings about them still remain and still rule your personality whether you like it or not. You must resolve your issues with your father by getting some kind of feelings of guilt or remorse from him. Try to get him to say sorry, try to make peace with him. I know it will be very hard since he hurt you so very much, but know that your low self-esteem is not going to go away unless you feel that he loves you. With this aspect, it is hard to like yourself, despite how many people try to tell you otherwise and try to affirm that there's nothing wrong with you. You feel that society stands in your way and doesn't let you be yourself, and you feel very little support from people. Rather, you feel that they reflect the views your father had of you! They're critical of everything you do, expecting perfection, and get in your way and don't let you express yourself. In reaction to this, you rebel against all authority, including your father. Because you can't stand anyone being demanding of you, since you are already so demanding of yourself and thus are very sensitive to criticism, you rebel against authority and hate to feel like you have to respect someone just because they're in a higher rank than you. Don't let that hinder your success in society. Your father had an overly pessimistic and cold view about the world. Don't let it stop you! Surround yourself with happy, optimistic people who let you believe in your dreams which your father so heavily restricted, and encourage your self expression...and then I feel that you'll be able to find the strength to not only stand independently, but to make peace with your father and face him.

I think surrounding yourself with people who love you, to counteract the way your father treated you will be very good for you.

posted September 09, 2012 09:48 AM            

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