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Author Topic:   I love you Cap Mooners...but you make a girl sick!
bullseye
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posted February 09, 2013 01:39 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for bullseye     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I genuinely do. But do I understand you? Not in the least bit. The male I'm dealing with is an Aqua with strong Cap tendencies in his chart (Venus, Moon, etc). He's hot, he's aloof, he's hot again, then he's aloof. We are currently in a long distance courtship, which is probably considered a friendship to him but he has told me he likes me and that he wants to pursue things. He has told me that I'm beautiful, that he wants to fully get to know all of me, that he's happy he met me. He called me on new years at midnight, he has expressed interest in dates, and I'm trying to be the strong and independent person that I am but its proving hard. I don't want to be played by this Aqua/Capper, I like him to the point of having my guts hurt every time I feel like I've been slighted or pushed off, and then run back to. Am I the backup? Do Caps in Venus have backups?

Should I be putting in more effort? I have held off to prove to him that I am ok with him needing SPACE. I need it to, I get where he is coming from there. He has never said that about relationships but we have spoken about how when we are in certain moods we just need to be left to our work. We really connect when we speak. However the next thing I know he's flirting with and liking pictures of this one stunning girl, and although they live thousands of miles away and I know I don't have to worry about anything physically happening (well until he goes there eventually on work this summer) because she is in a committed relationship, I wonder - is she his "one". Is that the girl he's waiting for like all caps set their eyes on? Why keep me around?

Do I need to pursue more? Do I need to let him know that I'm thinking of him? Because all I have to go off of are his words right now and his actions are fogging up that vision. Any insight would be helpful. I feel sick to my stomach.

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sharpei
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posted February 09, 2013 02:07 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for sharpei     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
that is not down to the cap influences-that is down to the aquarius influences. cap moons are emotionally cool but reliably so, they do not blow hot and cold unless there are other factors at play.

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Pisces-Sweety
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posted February 09, 2013 02:11 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Pisces-Sweety     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Stop pursuing him Bull. Just ignore him as in be very normal with him. If he becomes hot again, act like he's just talking to you normally(not flirting or anything) and see how it goes. Maybe he will put more effort into you and tone down his aloof behavior. Please don't ever do something you're not comfortable with. It seems his behavior is really getting to you. You deserve to be respected and loved. I immediately cut people out when they're hot and cold. People's emotions are not something you toy with. If he's really bothering you with his actions, drop him completely.

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bullseye
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posted February 09, 2013 02:22 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for bullseye     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by sharpei:
that is not down to the cap influences-that is down to the aquarius influences. cap moons are emotionally cool but reliably so, they do not blow hot and cold unless there are other factors at play.

See and then I do think its all in my head. I could be considered hot and cold because I don't text him every day. He always initiates conversation. Maybe I'm putting these thoughts into my own head because Im trying to affirm my insecurity and put up my guard (Taurus girl over here!)

He is a prominent figurehead in society as many Aqua/Cap mooners are. There was an incident where I was told that I basically should just stop trying because there were so many girls vying for his attention. When he found out about that he said it made him sick to his stomach, and he reassured me through an extremely long winded message that I was the only girl he was talking to. He kept bringing up how upset it made him. The other girl (the one who he likes all the pictures of) was in picture at that point in time as well.

Sometimes I wonder if a simple like means anything. I project it into being him falling for a girl he doesn't even know when males plaster their walls with attractive females all the time. I guess I just don't feel good enough when he's paying so much attention to the things she puts up and completely ignores mine. Would I ever say that? No. I'm stubborn and hate ******** so I convince myself to walk but...maybe Im taking this guy for granted.

Lots to think about.

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charlie
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posted February 09, 2013 02:45 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for charlie     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I can answer this!! I have a Cap Moon and 6 planets in 11H so I am ALMOST an Aqua..

Since those 6 planets sit in a house that is ruled by Uranus.....and my Moon is ruled by Saturn....and Saturn is in 11H....I am in a CONSTANT struggle with "being free" and "being stable". It drives people absolutely insane! Sadly, Uranus is stronger in me and almost always wins the battle. I have hurt many people with my actions and I have tried to explain about this "force" I have within me but it's hard for them to understand and I don't blame them.

The only sign combo that kinda keeps me on a straight line is Pisces with significant Fire placements.

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starmoon
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posted February 09, 2013 02:57 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for starmoon     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by sharpei:
that is not down to the cap influences-that is down to the aquarius influences. cap moons are emotionally cool but reliably so, they do not blow hot and cold unless there are other factors at play.

agree w/this. as a cap moon i want a very stable relationship. no games, no 'space' nonsense, a true partnership. the aqua is getting in the way for him. i'd try to reach his cap moon/venus and be more available, not less. takes us a very long time to fall for someone, so if he's said 'like' it's big. emotions don't come easily for caps

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Odette
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posted February 09, 2013 04:13 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Odette     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Where is his Mars?

I hope you don't say something like Aries or Cancer or even worse, Pisces...Because if that's the case - you should be asking about his Mars, not his Moon.

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happyaskings
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posted February 09, 2013 06:02 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for happyaskings     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I've had the same hot-cold issue with a Cap mooner for 4 months now. I'm about to drop him on his butt! You deserve to be treated right and if he's doing something that bothers you, speak up! Be calm and collected about it but talk to him about your needs. If nothing changes, you know where he stands with you and you don't need to waste any more of your time on him. If he does change, then that is a pretty good sign.

That said, I've always found Aquas to be pretty flirty and USUALLY honest. If he says you're the only one he's talking to like this then you probably are and the girl is just a pretty face that boosts his ego.

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JoJo
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posted February 09, 2013 10:26 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for JoJo     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Another cap mooner here. We are not hot and cold.

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GrlyGirl200
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posted February 09, 2013 11:21 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for GrlyGirl200     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
First off, I'm a Cap Moon and I have a Yod between my Sun/Mars/Asc Conjunction to my Jupiter/Uranus Sextile. I also have IC/and Mercury Uranus aspects, and my Venus is in the 11th house. So I can see completely understand where he is coming from.

I am also dealing with an Aqua/Cap guy myself. We are not dating, and are just friends now due to the distance (but we dated in college) is a Aqua with Cap Asc/Venus in Cap, Pisces Mercury, and Aries Mars. He only lives two hours away but that still is to much for him (he has trust issues).

My question to you is are you guys dating, otherwise I don't see what it is that he is doing that is wrong. I do it myself (such as comment on facebook, and I'm even dating someone...but as the Nicki Minaj song goes the guy I'm dating is just renting my heart while the Aqua owns it). But still love the Aqua with every fiber of my being.

Also another question I pose for you is he may not be that serious about either one of you. He is an Aqua who can do distance...but lets not forget Earth signs NEED physicality. Especially an Earth Moon...they would be realistic about potential relationships. You aren't there, and you have said that he is an established person in his field. I highly doubt he will move with his career going like it is (Cap influenced ppl won't sacrifice a career for someone). That might be where his hot and cold behavior is coming from. He likes you, but the hot and cold could be the internal war that he is going through with how he feels about you, but also knowing that it really may not be going anywhere.

May I ask how far apart you guys are distance wise?

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bullseye
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posted February 09, 2013 11:32 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for bullseye     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Odette:
Where is his Mars?

I hope you don't say something like Aries or Cancer or even worse, Pisces...Because if that's the case - you should be asking about his Mars, not his Moon.



Sun Aquarius
Moon Capricorn
Mercury Capricorn
Venus Capricorn
Mars Sagittarius
Jupiter Cancer
Saturn Capricorn
Uranus Capricorn
Neptune Capricorn
Pluto Scorpio

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bullseye
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posted February 09, 2013 11:37 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for bullseye     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by GrlyGirl200:
First off, I'm a Cap Moon and I have a Yod between my Sun/Mars/Asc Conjunction to my Jupiter/Uranus Sextile. I also have IC/and Mercury Uranus aspects, and my Venus is in the 11th house. So I can see completely understand where he is coming from.

I am also dealing with an Aqua/Cap guy myself. We are not dating, and are just friends now due to the distance (but we dated in college) is a Aqua with Cap Asc/Venus in Cap, Pisces Mercury, and Aries Mars. He only lives two hours away but that still is to much for him (he has trust issues).

My question to you is are you guys dating, otherwise I don't see what it is that he is doing that is wrong. I do it myself (such as comment on facebook, and I'm even dating someone...but as the Nicki Minaj song goes the guy I'm dating is just renting my heart while the Aqua owns it). But still love the Aqua with every fiber of my being.

Also another question I pose for you is he may not be that serious about either one of you. He is an Aqua who can do distance...but lets not forget Earth signs NEED physicality. Especially an Earth Moon...they would be realistic about potential relationships. You aren't there, and you have said that he is an established person in his field. I highly doubt he will move with his career going like it is (Cap influenced ppl won't sacrifice a career for someone). That might be where his hot and cold behavior is coming from. He likes you, but the hot and cold could be the internal war that he is going through with how he feels about you, but also knowing that it really may not be going anywhere.

May I ask how far apart you guys are distance wise?


Two hours away, and he travels for his job so he comes through my town quite a lot. However, even when I was in his city we only hung out once due to being so overly busy with out work and our own lives. I took that as a bad thing but he genuinely did try, almost every single day, to contact me and affirm that he wanted to hang out. He has visited me before, he makes the drive, and I do the same thing. We aren't dating though. He has expressed himself in regards to telling me that he likes me, he even told me that the next few times we hang out he wants things to be strictly intellectual because he's intrigued by what I have shown him I can offer him there and he doesn't want to rush things physically - so the physicality thing isn't making sense to me (although who knows). When hes on business he always contacts me as well, whenever he has service overseas. It all just seems like quite the effort to keep someone "around" but I can't let myself think its anything less because this has been glacial.

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anonymidarkness
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posted February 10, 2013 12:09 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for anonymidarkness     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
6 planets in capricorn,I think he should value stability.Mars in sagittarius could give him “grass is always greener on the other side” mentality.

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GrlyGirl200
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posted February 10, 2013 12:33 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for GrlyGirl200     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
What are your placements if I may ask?

I really don't see what it is that he is doing wrong. Maybe as a Cap Moon I understand...he is there and he is constant...but it just seems like you expect him to move faster or to be much more forward...he isn't going to be. He's taking it slow...if he said he liked you I would take that as a sign. I would also if I were him be sorta put off with how much reassurance you need. He is on business. I'm guessing he's a young guy who is focused on his job, and flirts and does stuff because he isn't in a relationship. Just enjoy him and stop over analyzing...an Aqua/Cap mix have a VERY low tolerance for that. I'm still sticking by the idea that distance is gonna be a factor...have you ever asked him about long distance relationships. Plus remember Cap Venus ONLY does serious relationships, and I can guarantee his Cap side isn't going to leave his job. I'm betting distance is a big factor, and I bet if you were in the same city that his super slow mentality would speed up somewhat (that is if it truly saw you as long term material).

This is a bold question but are you sleeping with him...I don't want to be over forward or rude. The reason I'm being so blunt is I have seen friends who have been in the same situation where they are "talking" to a guy in another city, and how it has ended up. Plus that Sag Mars has me suspect about him.

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GrlyGirl200
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posted February 10, 2013 12:38 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for GrlyGirl200     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by bullseye:
Two hours away, and he travels for his job so he comes through my town quite a lot. However, even when I was in his city we only hung out once due to being so overly busy with out work and our own lives. I took that as a bad thing but he genuinely did try, almost every single day, to contact me and affirm that he wanted to hang out. He has visited me before, he makes the drive, and I do the same thing. We aren't dating though. He has expressed himself in regards to telling me that he likes me, he even told me that the next few times we hang out he wants things to be strictly intellectual because he's intrigued by what I have shown him I can offer him there and he doesn't want to rush things physically - so the physicality thing isn't making sense to me (although who knows). When hes on business he always contacts me as well, whenever he has service overseas. It all just seems like quite the effort to keep someone "around" but I can't let myself think its anything less because this has been glacial.

When I say physicality I am not talking about sexual. I meant that Caps are practical...it's not practical to start a relationship with someone who is two hours away. At some point someone will have to relocate and chances are if he's a career man it isn't going to be him. You are not there in the physical sense. But it is a good sign he wanted to take it slow if you haven't slept with him.

My honest opinion is its the distance, and he's calling you and dealing with you because he probably considers you a friend, and likes you. But really again the distance is an issue and he as a Cap Venus IS NOT going to invest or really put much more time in than the bare minimum if he see's it going nowhere.

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happyaskings
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posted February 10, 2013 01:16 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for happyaskings     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
If distance IS indeed a factor then he is a **** for stringing you along like that...

Personally, I think distance thing is a person to person type of deal. Just because someone has a Cap moon doesn't mean they WON'T be in a LDR.

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bullseye
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posted February 10, 2013 03:16 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for bullseye     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by GrlyGirl200:
What are your placements if I may ask?

I really don't see what it is that he is doing wrong. Maybe as a Cap Moon I understand...he is there and he is constant...but it just seems like you expect him to move faster or to be much more forward...he isn't going to be. He's taking it slow...if he said he liked you I would take that as a sign. I would also if I were him be sorta put off with how much reassurance you need. He is on business. I'm guessing he's a young guy who is focused on his job, and flirts and does stuff because he isn't in a relationship. Just enjoy him and stop over analyzing...an Aqua/Cap mix have a VERY low tolerance for that. I'm still sticking by the idea that distance is gonna be a factor...have you ever asked him about long distance relationships. Plus remember Cap Venus ONLY does serious relationships, and I can guarantee his Cap side isn't going to leave his job. I'm betting distance is a big factor, and I bet if you were in the same city that his super slow mentality would speed up somewhat (that is if it truly saw you as long term material).

This is a bold question but are you sleeping with him...I don't want to be over forward or rude. The reason I'm being so blunt is I have seen friends who have been in the same situation where they are "talking" to a guy in another city, and how it has ended up. Plus that Sag Mars has me suspect about him.


Not sleeping with him. Like I said before a month or two ago he messaged me and told me that he had feelings for me, and that he wanted to not be physical for the next few dates because he really wanted to focus on our conversations and getting to know me as a person more. Its been 9 months of contact, and we've only seen each other a handful of times due to his job taking him away for months at a time.

See the thing is though... when I had the opportunity to move away for a month out of the whole year (In late December, I was given an opportunity in the UK) he messaged me out of the blue after not communicating with me for a whole week saying that it was such a shame I was going to be so far away, and basically said "If it weren't for that I'd be pursuing this so much more." So your distance theory makes a lot of sense. That came as a complete surprise to me as well, considering his job takes him away for so long and he kind of blamed me for his lack of pursuit.

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GrlyGirl200
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posted February 10, 2013 03:36 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for GrlyGirl200     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by bullseye:
Not sleeping with him. Like I said before a month or two ago he messaged me and told me that he had feelings for me, and that he wanted to not be physical for the next few dates because he really wanted to focus on our conversations and getting to know me as a person more. Its been 9 months of contact, and we've only seen each other a handful of times due to his job taking him away for months at a time.

See the thing is though... when I had the opportunity to move away for a month out of the whole year (In late December, I was given an opportunity in the UK) he messaged me out of the blue after not communicating with me for a whole week saying that it was such a shame I was going to be so far away, and basically said "If it weren't for that I'd be pursuing this so much more." So your distance theory makes a lot of sense. That came as a complete surprise to me as well, considering his job takes him away for so long and he kind of blamed me for his lack of pursuit.


You have your answer. The thing is anyone heavily Cap would see this as being a big giant red flag (ie the distance). From what you are saying you both are career orientated people...both doing well. At the end of the day it truly is a big deal to uproot your life because of someone else. So I def understand that he likes you...but there really is no where this can go in his mind.

And to let you know even though I am Cap influenced I actually had this same idea with my Aqua ex (with Cap Venus). When college ended we broke up due to him not knowing where we were going to end up. Turns out he ended up two hours away...and frequently came into town for football games (we went to a big football college). He didn't want a relationship with someone long distance. I didn't think it was a big deal (after all my Venus is in the 11th lol...and I'm a Cancer so after all I would have stuck it out). But the only reason I was willing to do it is because we had a past together. If it was new I wouldn't have started anything.

Fast forward three years after we dated and now he's found a job somewhat closer...an hour and a half way...but he decided to live an hour away from his new job. So now he's about to be 30 to 40 minutes away from me.

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bullseye
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posted February 10, 2013 03:56 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for bullseye     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by GrlyGirl200:
You have your answer. The thing is anyone heavily Cap would see this as being a big giant red flag (ie the distance). From what you are saying you both are career orientated people...both doing well. At the end of the day it truly is a big deal to uproot your life because of someone else. So I def understand that he likes you...but there really is no where this can go in his mind.

And to let you know even though I am Cap influenced I actually had this same idea with my Aqua ex (with Cap Venus). When college ended we broke up due to him not knowing where we were going to end up. Turns out he ended up two hours away...and frequently came into town for football games (we went to a big football college). He didn't want a relationship with someone long distance. I didn't think it was a big deal (after all my Venus is in the 11th lol...and I'm a Cancer so after all I would have stuck it out). But the only reason I was willing to do it is because we had a past together. If it was new I wouldn't have started anything.

Fast forward three years after we dated and now he's found a job somewhat closer...an hour and a half way...but he decided to live an hour away from his new job. So now he's about to be 30 to 40 minutes away from me.


This makes me feel sick. In all honesty I can see where you're coming from. Even when I am in his town he's always so busy. He texts me every single night affirming a hang out, and it usually happens on the very last night. It does almost come off as though it is a chore. When he's on his way over, or when we are talking about it he gets so excited though, its like he is elated and it shows and reassures me. I shouldn't be living in that though. Its just giving me hope when in reality there are times we go without seeing each other when hes just a drive away and he cancels because he can't get the car or he has an early job so he needs his sleep. Lots to think about.

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GrlyGirl200
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posted February 10, 2013 04:05 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for GrlyGirl200     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by bullseye:
This makes me feel sick. In all honesty I can see where you're coming from. Even when I am in his town he's always so busy. He texts me every single night affirming a hang out, and it usually happens on the very last night. It does almost come off as though it is a chore. When he's on his way over, or when we are talking about it he gets so excited though, its like he is elated and it shows and reassures me. I shouldn't be living in that though. Its just giving me hope when in reality there are times we go without seeing each other when hes just a drive away and he cancels because he can't get the car or he has an early job so he needs his sleep. Lots to think about.

I def understand where he is coming from. Don't get me wrong I am pretty sure he likes you, but again it IS a chore (and expensive!!) to drive two hours each time you want to see someone. And then we have no idea if he has trust issues (and thinks you might cheat being so far away) which can also be an issue. Also there is the idea that lets say you were able to uproot your life, if you didn't work out he would feel responsible for you moving and feel bad, and vice verse for him. He would feel terrible if he were to move and it didn't work out.

All I am saying is there is I think there are a lot of reasons why he is holding back, and he likes you so he still wants to be in contact with you. But seeing you will be difficult as it may make him feel more...which is why you don't see him. Remember Cap influenced ppl (esp Venus in Cap) need the physical presence of someone, and that physical presence would make him feel more for you.

My Aqua did this to me, he limited his physical contact around me when he wasn't sure where he was going to end up.

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sharpei
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posted February 10, 2013 04:14 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for sharpei     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
this makes alot of sense- i am in a foreign country right now but like this guy who is cap moon and venus and saturn neptune and uranus -phew lot of cap!

initially i was hurt he didnt seem to make much of an effort because i was abroad but now makes more sense...

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GrlyGirl200
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posted February 10, 2013 04:46 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for GrlyGirl200     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by sharpei:
this makes alot of sense- i am in a foreign country right now but like this guy who is cap moon and venus and saturn neptune and uranus -phew lot of cap!

initially i was hurt he didnt seem to make much of an effort because i was abroad but now makes more sense...


Yep, I wouldn't have made an effort either (well again it depends on how long you were together...brand new...no chance of me trying...but a long term relationship then I would have tried...it would have been WAY too much distance...and I would have wondered if the person was cheating on me etc). The thing with my Aqua ex is when we were in college we met before we both graduated (literally like three months before graduation). So that is why he was against anything long distance.

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