posted October 15, 2013 03:29 AM            

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It was definitely a surprise this time when I was asking Scorpion totem to forgive me for honoring it and eating one of its own when the response was "What? We don't need it anymore" (in regards to the encased body) . It was definitely not the usual "you're welcome" type answer. It felt impersonal and callous to a cultivated humanoid mind, and there were multiple voices, not just an overall vague one. However, I definitely can understand the answer.

It was also momentarily strange to me that people make novelties out of dead bugs and form them into eccentric lollipops, but that's a whole different topic. Either way, one dead bug can make all the difference, especially in a survival situation. How many times would you pass over trapping and eating bugs if you were lost out in the middle of nowhere? It's interesting that our society doesn't recognize them as a food source, but ensures that junk food is the new fun food group. And we as witches often honor the Thirteen Goals of a Witch- which includes our basic necessities- by honoring our bodies, exercising, breathing and eating properly.

On a practical level, Scorpion totem's response was quite truthful and blunt- when one of a totem's physical representatives dies, the body is left behind. They don't have a need for it any longer, though honoring a totem with bits of its left-behind member always helps enrich the spiritual totemic practice**. So for the scorpions, they consume each other all the time- if there's little food source available, if they're having sex (let's not focus for too long on the concept of being eaten and dying during that) , or if weakling young are unable to get back on their mothers' backs and the mother's stressed out. They poison each other through their stings before consuming each other, which means they take their own medicine into themselves again through their food, without it harming them.

You really are what you eat. Junk in, junk out. Your body's health will be reflected in what you've eaten and the nourishment you've given it. We hear it all the time and we practice it how often?? It's tough in our crazy urban jungle. It's not impossible, though – it does take discipline to deal with it consistently, especially in a stressed-out, under-rested, often-malnourished environment. We hear it all the time- eat well, sleep well- just doesn't often happen.

So what do you do? Confronted with a boundary you weren't aware of, do you screw up your will, move forward and integrate your past experiences to fluidly move forward and 'get over it', or do you shy away and try to pseudo-justify your actions, avoiding the issue at hand? Do you eat something that you know is bad for you but rationalize it away with empty promises of working out later to burn it off, say you'll put in extra effort tomorrow when you've slept better, or wait for a better opportunity to come along so you can eat properly? A couple hours' difference- even if you're starving now- between McDonald's or getting to come home and make your own sparse dinner of a can of tuna or pasta? One will fill you up and hold you, but only one will actually be healthy for you, even if it doesn't hold you as long. Do you 'know' you should be spending time working out, but keep pseudo-justifying it away with “Well, I'm tired after work, and I work hard enough as it is so maybe if I just keep working that extra weight will come off”, or do you actually take the commitment to honor thy temple and get yourself into a physically better shape which will reward you in many different ways to come?

Because to be honest, the few things squicking me out and keeping me from eating the scorpion for a few days were: 1) It's an arachnid/bug and first time I'd ever try it, 2) it was whole.... which means you're eating whatever it ate, too! It also reminded me that to take in another living being was to take in the life-force. Symbolically eating my totemic friend meant that I've apparently integrated it so well into my being that now I embody a part of its wisdom, which seems to be part of the point of consuming in totemic practices (from what I've seen anyways) . While Scorpion has been relatively silent in my life the last couple years, I've definitely seen its influence benefit me massively- becoming more observant, more opportunistic, sensitive as usual to energy vibrations but now, to the point where one can catch 'waves' of overall ambient energy at play as circumstances come and go, among other things

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