posted December 07, 2013 08:33 PM            

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Originally posted by LittleAqua:
I have a scorpio coworker who flirts with me all day. I can tell he is a little nervous around me - he plays mind games. I gave into him and told him i was deeply attracted to him and he rejected me in a horrible nasty way. Im now deeply hurt and he just acts as if nothing happened. Help! Ive never met anyone like this before.

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posted December 08, 2013 01:11 PM            

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Originally posted by LittleAqua:
Well he told me he was already in a relationship and very happy, and he didnt realise i would get attached to him - as he said he only ever flirted with me. Truth is he did more - he invited me to go away with him, he spoke to friends about what he should do about us... But yes, i should simply work normally, its very difficult when he keeps making sexual comments and looking at me the way he does..arghh...

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Eww... Sorry that happened to you.

I've been in a similar situation (though not quite the same). Essentially the reason he got so p*ssed at you is because you called his bluff and he's LYING (to multiple people it sounds like). People who are lying to you will automatically try to protect themselves by acting like the whole situation is a misunderstanding on your part and therefore it is your fault. I'm sure that he is in a relationship, and I'm sure that he's thinking about straying, but he doesn't want to face the consequences of that action. Essentially the 'misdirection' he is giving you is to get you to doubt yourself so you will be silenced (and won't go tell said girlfriend or wife).

I'm assuming you didn't know he was in a relationship before he told you about it when he 'rejected' you. I'm also guessing he wants what he assumes would 'just be a sexual relationship' (outside of his own relationship mind you), and so he considers his flirtations to be harmless.

There's a reason I very much dislike it when people say: "Oh, it's ok if I flirt with someone when I'm in a relationship."- It's only ok if both people know about it and understand it, or it is someone you will never see again, and there's definitely a line that you can cross easily and unknowingly in those situations.

posted December 09, 2013 03:07 AM            

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Originally posted by IrisRainbow:
When having to face a manipulative and lying Scorpio there is only one thing you can do.Fight fire with fire.
Have you ever seen what happens when you set fire around a Scorpio?It kills itself.Be that fire and make him fear you.Some Scorpios only ever appreciate bossy women that nobody messes with.

OR you can ignore him to death.It will hurt his little ego.

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posted December 09, 2013 03:26 AM              

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Originally posted by LittleAqua:
Im the bossy one at work. I thought he would hate it but he just stares at me smiling as im telling him about what we are currently working on. The look is not just a coworker frowning over a document, he looks into my eyes and smiles into me. I try to look down and ignore him. He is constantly, talking to others about me loudly so i can hear, always making slight fun of me. I wish he would just go away, I wish i could run away but im so trapped by him. He utterly and completely has my heart.

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I also agree with IrisRainbow.

I would march right up to him in the middle of everyone. Fire in your eyes, look him dead in his face and tell him that you don't care what he says as long as he keeps you out of his mouth or there's going to be a problem. No yelling, no cursing or anything. Just that burning internal flame. (don't know your sign, Aqua I guess?) Then walk away. Show NO intimidation whatsoever. Show up with power. He should back down.

posted December 09, 2013 06:48 AM            

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Originally posted by LittleAqua:
He utterly and completely has my heart.

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You made that decision to give it to him. Considering you said he was really nasty to you and always making fun of you with others around, I don't know why you're giving him the time of day. That and he is already in a committed relationship? I think you need to take some time away from the whole situation, so you can try and get some distance, and see whether or not, he is not a good person as people here seem to feel. Or if he is a poor lost misguided soul, who just wants to be loved.

My bet would be that he just likes knowing you find him attractive and has no intention of reciprocating and just feeds off of your energy. I feel it's only going to end badly for you. So follow it through, and learn a life lesson about relationships, it will be eye opening and help you grow.

On a side note, how well do you even know him? That he has your heart, have you spent time outside of work, do you have shared interests, been for a meal or out to something like the theatre, or something together? What is his background, family and friends like? If you don't know the answers to basic questions about him, I would personally be severely worried about the attachment and significance you are giving to him in your life.