posted April 06, 2014 02:58 PM            

I immediately stop giving emotional energy when it comes to people who cross me in some way. It's weird, its like gut reaction to just give my middle finger to the situation. It's almost as if I don't have the energy to waste time on it.

It's not really a convincing outwardly thing, but I do still have a little bit of heart. I do run 'colder' than most.

I wish I could answer that better besides drawing my attention elsewhere or trying to fix said situation. Or maybe I am too lazy for some emotions.

posted April 06, 2014 03:08 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by themischievousone:
I have both venus-uranus and moon-uranus aspects.

I immediately stop giving emotional energy when it comes to people who cross me in some way. It's weird, its like gut reaction to just give my middle finger to the situation. It's almost as if I don't have the energy to waste time on it.

It's not really a convincing outwardly thing, but I do still have a little bit of heart. I do run 'colder' than most.

I wish I could answer that better besides drawing my attention elsewhere or trying to fix said situation. Or maybe I am too lazy for some emotions.

---

themischievousone - that's a really good description.

posted April 06, 2014 03:28 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by rorrr:
themischievousone - that's a really good description.

If regarding a romantic situation with someone you truly cared for (once) and loved, do you really feel nothing toward them after all is said and done?

---

Yes. I just broke up with someone who cheated on me. I have no love interest at all for him. Right after I had evidence of it, it was almost like an "I'm done" switch. I still care about his well being and wish the best for him but that's where my feelings end. It has been similar with other exes.

Venus in Libra Sexile Uranus in Sag.
Moon in Gemini Opposite Uranus.

posted April 06, 2014 03:33 PM            

I can do that or just not care in the first place. It depends. I'm not heartless.
The closer the person is to me the more difficult of course but I do have that ability more than the average person.

Sometimes.... I will assign a value/importance to a person/situation and approach it logically. If it doesn't make sense to, then it CAN be a matter of choice if I want to invest emotionally or not.

posted April 06, 2014 04:03 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by I'm so cappy:
Does Moon quintile Uranus count?

---

totally! How does it go for you?

quote:

---

Originally posted by babybull82:
^^^Where is their venus???

---

posted April 06, 2014 04:09 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by DeepFreeze:
Moon Uranus trine

I can do that or just not care in the first place. It depends. I'm not heartless.
The closer the person is to me the more difficult of course but I do have that ability more than the average person.

---

If you are hurt, does it expedite things? I figure though if it's just like a reaction or defense mechanism it always comes back to bite you after a bit of cool down time...

But maybe not so with Moon-Uranus?

quote:

---

Sometimes.... I will assign a value/importance to a person/situation and approach it logically. If it doesn't make sense to, then it CAN be a matter of choice if I want to invest emotionally or not.

---

posted April 06, 2014 04:22 PM            

I have mars cappy, mars conjunct saturn, and moon square saturn.

I love my killswitch and consider it a gift. Makes moving on a breeze (which my venus in Aries appreciates).

posted April 06, 2014 04:38 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by lvASTRO:
I have those placements, the unknown.

I have mars cappy, mars conjunct saturn, and moon square saturn.

I love my killswitch and consider it a gift. Makes moving on a breeze (which my venus in Aries appreciates).

I'm extremely loyal, but eff me over and you're DONE!

---

posted April 06, 2014 04:53 PM            

I recently am out of a three year relationship, too, that ended in November. I found out little things along the way about how my ex had been unfaithful (physically, emotionally, etc.), and while he isn't a terrible guy, those are deal breakers to me, and HE LIED to me multiple times. Done. Ended it. He wanted to work on it. Nope. He wants to be friends and says, "How can you throw three years away? Let's be friends at least..." Double nope. You're done. I moved on very quickly, and I did love him very much, which is why the relationship went on so long despite the difficulties. I had no more chances to give.

posted April 06, 2014 04:57 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by rorrr:
OK this you have to explain. Wha...? You mean, in order of priority?

---

If I'm hurt, I hide the hurt away and go cold and many many times disappear. I was upset with my dad pretty bad once and simply had zero contact for around 6 months. It in no way consumed me. Just kind of a punishment I guess. "if you want to do this, this is what you will get"
It's much more difficult if I am in a situation that I can't get away from them. At that point I can be unnecessarily mean to make them go away or stay away.
one ex comes to mind who didn't TECHNICALLY cheat but it was very very shady. She kept trying to stay in contact but I was just mean. Eventually we were friends and 6 years later she wanted to get back together. I wasn't mean, but very very cold, emotionless as I explained to her that it would never happen... Not a relationship....not a fling - nothing and why. It worked perfect. She got the point without getting upset. Disappointed maybe but that's it.

The choosing....
Well I might say to myself, "what is the worst case if this person is upset with me?"
Or "how is my life impacted if this person is gone?"
"what value do they bring? do I need it? Can it be replaced?"

"Is this worth it?"

If I determine so, in many cases I justify things and can simply shut off. I may assign a punishment in a way. In my head I'll tell myself "I'm not talking to them anymore"

My moon in Gemini trine Uranus in Scorpio.
my moon also squares mercury and Mars in Virgo... Perhaps adding the "logical" approach.

Love relationships can be very difficult though... Depending.

Another example... I had a close guy friend at work. (I'm also a guy) we talked and confided in each other a lot. I upset him a lot once which he had a right to be, but he said he still wanted to be friends. He was never the same though and what made our friendship great was gone. I tried for months to get him to come around Buuuuut no go.
So one day I walked up and said, "do you want to talk to me anymore because you are not yourself?"

He said, "I don't really care."

posted April 06, 2014 05:35 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by DeepFreeze:
If I'm hurt, I hide the hurt away and go cold and many many times disappear. I was upset with my dad pretty bad once and simply had zero contact for around 6 months. It in no way consumed me. Just kind of a punishment I guess. "if you want to do this, this is what you will get"
It's much more difficult if I am in a situation that I can't get away from them. At that point I can be unnecessarily mean to make them go away or stay away.
one ex comes to mind who didn't TECHNICALLY cheat but it was very very shady. She kept trying to stay in contact but I was just mean. Eventually we were friends and 6 years later she wanted to get back together. I wasn't mean, but very very cold, emotionless as I explained to her that it would never happen... Not a relationship....not a fling - nothing and why. It worked perfect. She got the point without getting upset. Disappointed maybe but that's it.

The choosing....
Well I might say to myself, "what is the worst case if this person is upset with me?"
Or "how is my life impacted if this person is gone?"
"what value do they bring? do I need it? Can it be replaced?"

"Is this worth it?"

If I determine so, in many cases I justify things and can simply shut off. I may assign a punishment in a way. In my head I'll tell myself "I'm not talking to them anymore"

My moon in Gemini trine Uranus in Scorpio.
my moon also squares mercury and Mars in Virgo... Perhaps adding the "logical" approach.

Love relationships can be very difficult though... Depending.

Another example... I had a close guy friend at work. (I'm also a guy) we talked and confided in each other a lot. I upset him a lot once which he had a right to be, but he said he still wanted to be friends. He was never the same though and what made our friendship great was gone. I tried for months to get him to come around Buuuuut no go.
So one day I walked up and said, "do you want to talk to me anymore because you are not yourself?"

He said, "I don't really care."

I said very casual and accepting, "okay" and walked away.
He's just like a ghost to me now although I do enjoy looking him in the eyes to mess with/intimidate him.

---

posted April 06, 2014 05:52 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by DeepFreeze:
If I'm hurt, I hide the hurt away and go cold and many many times disappear. I was upset with my dad pretty bad once and simply had zero contact for around 6 months. It in no way consumed me. Just kind of a punishment I guess. "if you want to do this, this is what you will get"
It's much more difficult if I am in a situation that I can't get away from them. At that point I can be unnecessarily mean to make them go away or stay away.
[...]

The choosing....
Well I might say to myself, "what is the worst case if this person is upset with me?"
Or "how is my life impacted if this person is gone?"
"what value do they bring? do I need it? Can it be replaced?"

"Is this worth it?"

If I determine so, in many cases I justify things and can simply shut off. I may assign a punishment in a way. In my head I'll tell myself "I'm not talking to them anymore"

My moon in Gemini trine Uranus in Scorpio.
my moon also squares mercury and Mars in Virgo... Perhaps adding the "logical" approach.

Love relationships can be very difficult though... Depending.

---

All of this sounds scarily utilitarian. I don't know if that is the healthiest way to deal!!!

On a purely intellectual level - of course you know you will be fine with or without *anyone* in your life, as in... you will breathe, survive, eat, live, make some sort of companion somehow. But the qualitative aspects of connection which require risk and emotional depth are what LIFE is about, and maybe you can hide from those risks and still be happy...but well... Would you want your child to experience life and happiness this way? So guarded?

Stepping out of each of our own fears/baggage/complexes etc, would you genuinely want to impart this approach to school children or someone innocent that you cared about that this is the best way to live?

---

Have you ever been in love then? When you have developed a level of intimacy with someone, aren't the trust issues terrifying for you? How do you confront that?

Does 'needing' someone - like, relying on your feelings for example, instead of your mind - repulse you? Do you view emotions as weakness? Emotions aren't logical and therefore easy to control, but they exist for a reason... It's like an immune system for your soul, it tells you when it is hungry or nourished or injured or healthy

I believe this technique of moving on so quickly and cutting off is really efficient and for that reason arguably good for you...

posted April 06, 2014 06:18 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by rorrr:

All of this sounds scarily utilitarian. I don't know if that is the healthiest way to deal!!!

On a purely intellectual level - of course you know you will be fine with or without *anyone* in your life, as in... you will breathe, survive, eat, live, make some sort of companion somehow. But the qualitative aspects of connection which require risk and emotional depth are what LIFE is about, and maybe you can hide from those risks and still be happy...but well... Would you want your child to experience life and happiness this way? So guarded?

Stepping out of each of our own fears/baggage/complexes etc, would you genuinely want to impart this approach to school children or someone innocent that you cared about that this is the best way to live?

---

Have you ever been in love then? When you have developed a level of intimacy with someone, aren't the trust issues terrifying for you? How do you confront that?

Does 'needing' someone - like, relying on your feelings for example, instead of your mind - repulse you? Do you view emotions as weakness? Emotions aren't logical and therefore easy to control, but they exist for a reason... It's like an immune system for your soul, it tells you when it is hungry or nourished or injured or healthy

I believe this technique of moving on so quickly and cutting off is really efficient and for that reason arguably good for you...

But it doesn't allow a lot of room to grow? As in... aren't you prone to doing this over and over and thereby repeating a lot of the same mistakes with many different people? And to expand this further, it's easy to view life as individuals in survival - we are - we have to take care of ourselves and tend to our own energy - but if people come into your life and are made worse by it, you're not helping the world you're only helping yourself...?

---

Yes, you are very correct in what you say.

Plus, this is just me. There are many things that may contribute.

There have been times that I wished I could be more vulnerable emotionally and let creativity and passion flow. My own family has it hidden from them in ways.
Currently I am very deeply in love with a member here (barbiegirl19).

It can be extremely difficult. I reach a point where I realize that my emotions are surpassing my ability to guard myself... My ability to turn off. I always have that happen and it creates panic. Total fear and can provoke sabotage even. It's fight or flight kind of and so scary. Some relationships have never gone past that even after a year. (the ex mentioned above). It's different currently with barbiegirl19. She has my complete trust. She has all of me and I am open and unguarded. All of my passion, feelings, goofiness is out there.

As for when we have children. Well, from an emotional standpoint, I will encourage them to be themselves. If they are very social, open... Great. More guarded, cool. Whatever is natural for them if it's not hurting them or someone else who loves them.
I want them to be comfortable and open with me and I will do the same.

When I was younger I was basically an emotional maniac. I kind of adopted this behavior which even could be my Scorpio north node, progressed chart containing lots of Scorpio. Also back then maybe not understanding how to handle that uranus/moon energy.

Which is how I envision a square. I could be wrong and someone can correct me but I see it as like...
"this is how I feel and that's that. You upset me. Its your fault. I'll feel how I want." or something like that...?

posted April 06, 2014 06:19 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by rorrr:
PS: Can I just add I'm so sorry if this comes across as a critique because your feedback is super insightful and helpful and in no way am I trying to criticize that!!! I'm genuinely interested in the way you think

---

posted April 06, 2014 09:01 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by DeepFreeze:

It can be extremely difficult. I reach a point where I realize that my emotions are surpassing my ability to guard myself... My ability to turn off. I always have that happen and it creates panic. Total fear and can provoke sabotage even. It's fight or flight kind of and so scary. Some relationships have never gone past that even after a year. (the ex mentioned above). It's different currently with barbiegirl19. She has my complete trust. She has all of me and I am open and unguarded. All of my passion, feelings, goofiness is out there.

I could be wrong and someone can correct me but I see it as like...
"this is how I feel and that's that. You upset me. Its your fault. I'll feel how I want." or something like that...?

---

That's really great you've found that, congratulations for both of you Because that kind of connection and acceptance is really rare. Can I ask what barbiegirl19's placements are? Do you guys have a synastry chart?

This fight or flight and sabotage thing - I have definitely seen a lot of that. It seems really hair-trigger and super sensitive to any seeming threat. It is scary. Did you ever hit a point like that with barbiegirl, and if so, how did you manage through it? What do you tell yourself, etc...?

What about situations involving shame - do you cut off, or can you reach a point of surrender and apology? It seems like the Uranus-Moon response to the concept surrender is like, "ummmm....no"

Though I do understand that "I'll feel how I want" kind of thing. It's tough regarding Moon issues because Uranus creates this kind of ego around emotional situations which really puts a lot of distance between truth or connection... Uranus can be very self-righteous sometimes!!!

posted April 06, 2014 09:28 PM            

I thought you and your mars square saturn guy were done. What happened afterwards?

I can totally see how DeepFreeze's comments play out in someone I know. But I've also learned from my male buddy (who has mars saturn conjunct), you gotta call them out on their BS.

posted April 06, 2014 09:30 PM            

I'll say it's quite easy to cut off. Idk, I don't regret coz usually I know that I've tried my best n there's nothing left to mull over.

How does that work.... Idk, it just does. LIke other posters have mentioned, it's like a switch.

In most cases other people put themselves through a lot of troubles, all for nothing and they'd accuse me for causing them hurt. In my mind I'm like "Oh no don't drag me into your mess". So yah, I cut off quickly and stay out of it.

posted April 06, 2014 09:48 PM            

I had it, but she's soooooooo patient, understanding and kind... It's unbelievable.
Plus, she's honest. She's not rude but if I ask her something I get the truth even if it's a hard pill to swallow. That's amazing. I don't want anything held back. Else hoe can I grow, expand, and be the best that I can be for her.
was much more short lived and she seems like she can just read me like a book. She just gets me and knows how to handle anything that I throw at her.
Everything is incredible. I had that little fight or flight period as always but it was knocked down quickly.
Just be straight forward... I think that's the best. But the other (me) has to be open to being wrong, admitting it and apologizing, then follow through with action.

My Venus trines her Uranus and her Venus conjunct mine so the energy is familiar as well. That probably helps a ton.