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Author
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Topic: Heavy saturn in the synastry. Can you avoid the misery?
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next to neptune
Knowflake Posts: 1295
From: The Moon
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted April 21, 2014 05:57 PM
  
Me and my boyfriend really got some serious saturn going on in both synastry and composite. Never had so much saturn with anyone, so we are probably never gonna split up lol.
Might as well make the best of it!
But I think it's a bit hard too. I don't really know why but I think it's a bit "boring" to already have found the one. I'm also a bit worried because of all the saturn squares that one of us is going to feel miserable but unable to express it or move on?In synastry we got:
saturn opposite ascendant double whammy
sun-saturn double whammy (my saturn squares his sun and his saturn trines my sun)
saturn square venus And in composite we have
saturn square venus again! :/
moon quintile saturn
saturn opposite ascendant again!!
And saturn in capricorn 7th house And also, which one is going to feel the misery the most between sun square saturn and sun trine saturn? IP: Logged |
Orange
Knowflake Posts: 1335
From: Georgia
Registered: May 2009
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posted April 21, 2014 06:21 PM
Nope. Cant avoid it. Both will feel the mysery. IP: Logged |
lifefullofwords
Knowflake Posts: 137
From:
Registered: Sep 2013
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posted April 21, 2014 06:28 PM
Depends on how you both handle Saturn's energy but the squares are bound to be difficult. Still, Saturn will tie you together unless the relationship becomes too stifling. Personally I would rather have too much Saturn than too little Saturn but there is such a thing as too much of a good thing. My ex and I had less Saturn than you two and the relationship felt very, very heavy after a while, that's part of why we broke up. But if you're happy with your boyfriend then I wouldn't worry about it.I think it's the Sun person who will feel stifled in Sun square Saturn. Sun trine Saturn actually sounds nice. IP: Logged |
next to neptune
Knowflake Posts: 1295
From: The Moon
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted April 21, 2014 06:45 PM
quote:
Originally posted by lifefullofwords:
Depends on how you both handle Saturn's energy but the squares are bound to be difficult. Still, Saturn will tie you together unless the relationship becomes too stifling. Personally I would rather have too much Saturn than too little Saturn but there is such a thing as too much of a good thing. My ex and I had less Saturn than you two and the relationship felt very, very heavy after a while, that's part of why we broke up. But if you're happy with your boyfriend then I wouldn't worry about it.I think it's the Sun person who will feel stifled in Sun square Saturn. Sun trine Saturn actually sounds nice.
I really try to be careful with not stifling him, but it's hard… I'm worried that no matter what I do, it's some inevitable force from saturn somehow hehe And I can also feel myself starting to get stifled, because I try so hard NOT to lol… It's like I'm afraid of changing the way I am around him, like I can never be 100% myself… IP: Logged |
lifefullofwords
Knowflake Posts: 137
From:
Registered: Sep 2013
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posted April 21, 2014 06:51 PM
quote:
Originally posted by next to neptune:
I really try to be careful with not stifling him, but it's hard… I'm worried that no matter what I do, it's some inevitable force from saturn somehow heheAnd I can also feel myself starting to get stifled, because I try so hard NOT to lol… It's like I'm afraid of changing the way I am around him, like I can never be 100% myself…
That's interesting that you say that, because after a while (not at first) I felt like I couldn't be myself around my ex, and I'm pretty sure it was mutual. How long have you two been together if you don't mind me asking? I will say I'd be careful about making the difficult aspects into a self-fulfilling prophecy... you never know, maybe it will never be an issue and they will manifest in a manageable way. IP: Logged |
next to neptune
Knowflake Posts: 1295
From: The Moon
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted April 21, 2014 07:04 PM
quote:
Originally posted by lifefullofwords:
That's interesting that you say that, because after a while (not at first) I felt like I couldn't be myself around my ex, and I'm pretty sure it was mutual. How long have you two been together if you don't mind me asking? I will say I'd be careful about making the difficult aspects into a self-fulfilling prophecy... you never know, maybe it will never be an issue and they will manifest in a manageable way.
Almost a year now… and I know what you mean, but I also feel like if I forgot about saturn, then that is were it really begins to show itself :S But I'm also just starting to feel that because we have been together for so long, I should really start feeling more comfortable around him, or else something must be wrong… but I don't really feel 100% comfortable around him, and I don't know if I'm ever going to be actually
IP: Logged |
lifefullofwords
Knowflake Posts: 137
From:
Registered: Sep 2013
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posted April 21, 2014 07:14 PM
quote:
Originally posted by next to neptune:
Almost a year now… and I know what you mean, but I also feel like if I forgot about saturn, then that is were it really begins to show itself :S But I'm also just starting to feel that because we have been together for so long, I should really start feeling more comfortable around him, or else something must be wrong… but I don't really feel 100% comfortable around him, and I don't know if I'm ever going to be actually
Are you the Venus in Saturn square Venus? That's supposed to make it difficult to feel entirely comfortable around someone. A year is a long time to still feel that way. I can't say I ever felt that way about my ex but we only had Venus and Saturn in hard aspect in our composite. I see what you're saying about watching for the signs, it's good to work on maintaining a relationship before things go bad. On the bright side I think you are more likely to stay together than a couple with no Saturn at all. IP: Logged |
next to neptune
Knowflake Posts: 1295
From: The Moon
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted April 21, 2014 07:21 PM
quote:
Originally posted by lifefullofwords:
Are you the Venus in Saturn square Venus? That's supposed to make it difficult to feel entirely comfortable around someone. A year is a long time to still feel that way. I can't say I ever felt that way about my ex but we only had Venus and Saturn in hard aspect in our composite. I see what you're saying about watching for the signs, it's good to work on maintaining a relationship before things go bad. On the bright side I think you are more likely to stay together than a couple with no Saturn at all.
no he is actually :/
yes I do think we can stay together, but I want us to be happy too, cause if someone is starting to feel stifled it's not so fun anymore :S IP: Logged |
lifefullofwords
Knowflake Posts: 137
From:
Registered: Sep 2013
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posted April 21, 2014 07:28 PM
quote:
Originally posted by next to neptune:
no he is actually :/
yes I do think we can stay together, but I want us to be happy too, cause if someone is starting to feel stifled it's not so fun anymore :S
Yeah, that's the thing... Saturn will keep you together, at least for a while, but it can make you really unhappy. Maybe just enjoy what you do have? Or maybe it's time to reevaluate the relationship? I wish I had wasted less time on my ex. The relationship was good for a while but after a while it wasn't and I should have shut it down then. But I don't know what's going on between the two of you, maybe you're happy despite the Saturn, I know we were for a while. I do believe difficult synastry can sometimes be overcome with work. IP: Logged |
next to neptune
Knowflake Posts: 1295
From: The Moon
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted April 21, 2014 07:42 PM
quote:
Originally posted by lifefullofwords:
Yeah, that's the thing... Saturn will keep you together, at least for a while, but it can make you really unhappy. Maybe just enjoy what you do have? Or maybe it's time to reevaluate the relationship? I wish I had wasted less time on my ex. The relationship was good for a while but after a while it wasn't and I should have shut it down then. But I don't know what's going on between the two of you, maybe you're happy despite the Saturn, I know we were for a while. I do believe difficult synastry can sometimes be overcome with work.
I do think we are happy, and maybe I am just worrying too much, at least I think that compared to my last relationship this is a peace of cake lol… saturn squares are at least more "peaceful" than pluto squares! IP: Logged |
lifefullofwords
Knowflake Posts: 137
From:
Registered: Sep 2013
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posted April 21, 2014 07:54 PM
quote:
Originally posted by next to neptune:
I do think we are happy, and maybe I am just worrying too much, at least I think that compared to my last relationship this is a peace of cake lol… saturn squares are at least more "peaceful" than pluto squares!
Since you're happy I think you should just try not to worry about it - although I know that's easier said than done. Saturn does make things very stable, and that's a nice feeling, at least for me. I like synastry with a lot of Saturn, it's just that some aspects are easier to deal with than others. IP: Logged |
orocairion
Knowflake Posts: 226
From:
Registered: May 2013
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posted April 21, 2014 08:59 PM
quote:
Originally posted by next to neptune:
I really try to be careful with not stifling him, but it's hard… I'm worried that no matter what I do, it's some inevitable force from saturn somehow heheAnd I can also feel myself starting to get stifled, because I try so hard NOT to lol… It's like I'm afraid of changing the way I am around him, like I can never be 100% myself…
Hah!. I can relate to all of that. Lot's of Saturn in the Synastry and the composite. Made more difficult by a Mercury square Mercury. IP: Logged |
manderin
Knowflake Posts: 147
From: New York, NY USA
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted April 21, 2014 09:06 PM
Yeah, you shouldn't worry so much. Whatever is meant to be is meant to be. I think the important thing to remember is not to force things. If the relationship with your bf is working that's great and it's nothing to sweat over. But if at some point you start to find that it's not working and that you're not happy, try to resist the urge to force the relationship and "make it work". Because hard saturn aspects will make you want to force it to work even though it's not meant to. When you think about it, this isn't a tragic thing. It just requires a little more self-awareness.
IP: Logged |
manderin
Knowflake Posts: 147
From: New York, NY USA
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted April 21, 2014 09:14 PM
quote:
Originally posted by orocairion:
Made more difficult by a Mercury square Mercury.
I HATE this aspect. lol. I have this with someone I've known for a decade. When he speaks to me I often have trouble understanding him. It sounds to me like he's mumbling and I constantly ask him to repeat himself. He calls me deaf because he thinks I don't hear well, but I hear everyone else just fine! And it's not the volume of his voice, it's the actual way he speaks that makes me have a hard time understanding him. Others have no problem understanding him when he speaks. And I often feel like he doesn't listen to me when I tell him something. But despite all this we really like each other because we have a lot of other good aspects. Merc sq Merc sure doesn't help communication though! Causes a lot of misunderstandings. With most people the misunderstandings seem to come from the interpretations of what was said, but in my relationship with this person it seems to manifest as LITERALLY being able to understand the words coming out of the other person's mouth. I can see why this aspect is considered a big red flag, but it's probably the most benign of the red flags.
IP: Logged |
orocairion
Knowflake Posts: 226
From:
Registered: May 2013
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posted April 21, 2014 10:42 PM
quote:
Originally posted by manderin:
I HATE this aspect. lol. I have this with someone I've known for a decade. When he speaks to me I often have trouble understanding him. It sounds to me like he's mumbling and I constantly ask him to repeat himself. He calls me deaf because he thinks I don't hear well, but I hear everyone else just fine! And it's not the volume of his voice, it's the actual way he speaks that makes me have a hard time understanding him. Others have no problem understanding him when he speaks. And I often feel like he doesn't listen to me when I tell him something. But despite all this we really like each other because we have a lot of other good aspects. Merc sq Merc sure doesn't help communication though! Causes a lot of misunderstandings. With most people the misunderstandings seem to come from the interpretations of what was said, but in my relationship with this person it seems to manifest as LITERALLY being able to understand the words coming out of the other person's mouth. I can see why this aspect is considered a big red flag, but it's probably the most benign of the red flags.
It is a weird aspect. I have the same square with another person and we can understand each other perfectly at all levels. With my SO though, it can be a mess of misunderstandings, usually. Thing is, they didn't seem to happen as often before so I'm wondering if in this it is mostly mental by just being aware there is a square.
IP: Logged |
lvASTRO
Knowflake Posts: 55
From:
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted April 21, 2014 11:04 PM
Another thing to consider is Saturn aspects and placements, as well as Saturnine energies in the natal charts. If you have a lot of earth, like myself, particularly of Capricorn, or aspects involving Saturn-Venus, or any of the other aspects mentioned in the synastry/composite, it can be effectively quite easier. Where is the chart ruler? Which house energies are most prevalent. This can ease things if you're used to Saturn's influence--being critical/critiquing others yourself, playing the role of mentor, strong feelings of responsibility, etc., and other Saturn themes.For example, my boo boo is heavily Scorpio and has a **** ton of Pluto, with Neptune chart ruler. I have Pluto on the ascendant, as well as sun and venus-pluto, which helps me through and effectively makes my outlook and handling more Plutonian. We do have a Venus-Saturn semi-square, but I like it. The orb is tight, and it feels more like glue. We feel responsible to each other. Call each other on our bs. Correct each other. Clean your act up. Be accountable. I think it's all how you view the energies. Communication is also a MUST! IP: Logged |
next to neptune
Knowflake Posts: 1295
From: The Moon
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted April 22, 2014 02:26 AM
quote:
Originally posted by manderin:
Yeah, you shouldn't worry so much. Whatever is meant to be is meant to be. I think the important thing to remember is not to force things. If the relationship with your bf is working that's great and it's nothing to sweat over. But if at some point you start to find that it's not working and that you're not happy, try to resist the urge to force the relationship and "make it work". Because hard saturn aspects will make you want to force it to work even though it's not meant to. When you think about it, this isn't a tragic thing. It just requires a little more self-awareness.
Yeah I really think you are right on this… I shouldn't try so hard on it. IP: Logged |
LucieLemonade
Knowflake Posts: 603
From:
Registered: Sep 2013
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posted April 22, 2014 06:24 AM
My x and I had lots of Saturn, including S opp Asc, S opp V, S con S, and S square Sun, and we both felt extremely comfortable around each other and 100% ourselves. If you can't feel like yourself, you're not going to be happy in the long run. You have to try to understand why that is and how you're going to fix it. IP: Logged |
manderin
Knowflake Posts: 147
From: New York, NY USA
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted April 22, 2014 06:29 AM
quote:
Originally posted by orocairion:
(merc square merc) I'm wondering if in this it is mostly mental by just being aware there is a square.
I didn't even know about astrology for the first few years of meeting him and this is a problem I've had with him since day 1. I was that person that said Astrology is a sham but when I was forced to look at the evidence I became a follower so to speak. How tight the aspect is may have something to do with it too. Mercury is also my chart ruler and some say that makes a difference as well. I don't see it as a deal breaker aspect though. Not that any one aspect would ever be a deal-breaker but you get what I mean. IP: Logged |
manderin
Knowflake Posts: 147
From: New York, NY USA
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted April 22, 2014 06:34 AM
Is Saturn opp the ASC really a bad thing? Planets conjunct the other person's DESC tend to be a good sign I thought.Plus I've read so many people on here say that they've experienced someone's saturn on their ASC and they Hated that aspect. Wouldn't this mean that the opposition to the ASC would be much better? IP: Logged |
next to neptune
Knowflake Posts: 1295
From: The Moon
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted April 22, 2014 01:24 PM
quote:
Originally posted by LucieLemonade:
My x and I had lots of Saturn, including S opp Asc, S opp V, S con S, and S square Sun, and we both felt extremely comfortable around each other and 100% ourselves. If you can't feel like yourself, you're not going to be happy in the long run. You have to try to understand why that is and how you're going to fix it.
Wow that's almost the same saturn aspect as we have.
I think you are very right on this. But well… you also say he is your ex-boyfriend, so something must have gotten wrong then? IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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