Author
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Topic: Cheaters
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DeepFreeze unregistered
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posted July 15, 2014 04:25 PM
quote: Originally posted by next to neptune: Me too, I have way too many of those aspect/placement and so does my boyfriend… you know what, even if any of us actually DID cheat I would probably just think "Whatever, as long as you still love me the most!"
I send them back to where they came from, first one.  IP: Logged |
BellaFenice Knowflake Posts: 3419 From: Neptune with PisceanDream, Faith, and Meissieri Registered: Sep 2013
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posted July 15, 2014 04:43 PM
quote: Originally posted by Barbiegirl19: I think WHOLE birth charts and synastry between all of those involved should be looked at and interpreted. I think Moon/Pluto synastry is irresistible and makes a person uncontrollable of themselves if they aren't in control. Mars/Venus is also a big one IMO
YES!!!!!! Already noticed the stereotypes for Gemini, Pisces, and Aqua. Surprised Sag hasn't been claimed yet. IP: Logged |
AlexDern Knowflake Posts: 621 From: Registered: Dec 2013
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posted July 15, 2014 04:52 PM
Planets in the second house besides the moon.I notice people with planets in the second house will cheat for the sake of pleasure...where as people with planets else where, it's more of an emotional thing... The second house is ruled by taurus...taurus rules pleasure, beast like lust, but scorpio is more of the I'll get revenge style or flavor. IP: Logged |
starrynight Knowflake Posts: 322 From: Registered: Feb 2014
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posted July 15, 2014 05:32 PM
My chart has many of the things mentioned here, heh:*Gemini placements - yes, Moon *afflicted Venus - yes, Venus in fall and square Neptune *aspect from Moon to Venus - yes, though it's not a harsh one *aspect from Mars to Neptune - yes, wide conjunction *Mars in Gemini, Pisces or Sagittarius - yes *aspect from Venus to Jupiter - yes, conjunction *Moon and Venus in mutable signs - yes, both of them *Moon-Jupiter aspects - yes, Moon trine Jupiter *3rd house placements - my second dominant house *5th house placements - my dominant house *Mercury, Uranus, Neptune, Mars in 5th/7th/12th - yes, all of them *harsh Uranus aspects - yes, Moon opp Uranus *Moon in harsh aspect to Mars - yes, Moon widely opp Mars *any aspects from Uranus to Moon or Venus - yes, Uranus sextile Venus *Uranus rules the 7th house - yes And well... I have never cheated in my life. Not once. But I'm the kind of person who can end a relationship out of the blue because I fell for someone else. It doesn't happen often, but when it happens, it's in true Uranian style--so sudden it will give you vertigo. The real life example: I've been dating guy A for half a year. Then I literally met guy B on the street. Just an accident. He almost knocked me down. It took just one look at him while he was helping me get my balance back to realize YES OMG YES. I broke up with guy A about 4 hours later. Guy B and I didn't do anything, just exchanged phone numbers. Our relationship with guy A was maybe less passionate than it used to be, but it wasn't problematic. In short, I don't cheat, but I can drop a boyfriend like a hot potato if someone else really strikes my fancy. IP: Logged |
next to neptune Knowflake Posts: 3104 From: The Moon Registered: Aug 2013
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posted July 15, 2014 05:54 PM
quote: Originally posted by starrynight: My chart has many of the things mentioned here, heh:*Gemini placements - yes, Moon *afflicted Venus - yes, Venus in fall and square Neptune *aspect from Moon to Venus - yes, though it's not a harsh one *aspect from Mars to Neptune - yes, wide conjunction *Mars in Gemini, Pisces or Sagittarius - yes *aspect from Venus to Jupiter - yes, conjunction *Moon and Venus in mutable signs - yes, both of them *Moon-Jupiter aspects - yes, Moon trine Jupiter *3rd house placements - my second dominant house *5th house placements - my dominant house *Mercury, Uranus, Neptune, Mars in 5th/7th/12th - yes, all of them *harsh Uranus aspects - yes, Moon opp Uranus *Moon in harsh aspect to Mars - yes, Moon widely opp Mars *any aspects from Uranus to Moon or Venus - yes, Uranus sextile Venus *Uranus rules the 7th house - yes And well... I have never cheated in my life. Not once. But I'm the kind of person who can end a relationship out of the blue because I fell for someone else. It doesn't happen often, but when it happens, it's in true Uranian style--so sudden it will give you vertigo. The real life example: I've been dating guy A for half a year. Then I literally met guy B on the street. Just an accident. He almost knocked me down. It took just one look at him while he was helping me get my balance back to realize YES OMG YES. I broke up with guy A about 4 hours later. Guy B and I didn't do anything, just exchanged phone numbers. Our relationship with guy A was maybe less passionate than it used to be, but it wasn't problematic. In short, I don't cheat, but I can drop a boyfriend like a hot potato if someone else really strikes my fancy.
Wow that is kind of disturbing to read! You might be able to end the relationship before you go on to the next, but in my eyes that's almost even worse than cheating, because you kind of just become distant and fall out of love… I feel that many of those aspect you posted also gives that "suddenly gone, easy to move on" kind of feeling… it's kind of frightening to read about, cause my own boyfriend has the same potential…. I literally fear the day he will do the same number as you did there, cause I know it will happen with all his placement… He has sun in libra, venus in libra and mercury in virgo in house 5. Leo jupiter in house 3 sextile his sun. Pisces moon in 10th house square gemini mars in 12th… libra venus in 5 square cap uranus in 7th… and also neptune in the 7th square sun! All of this, and then jupiter sextile mars. It's so doomed lol… On the other hand he has moon sextile saturn in 8th, capricorn DC (but ASC opposite uranus!!!) and moon trine pluto (and these are his closest aspect) I feel that makes him emotionally mature enough to stay with the same… IP: Logged |
IV XXIV Knowflake Posts: 450 From: Registered: Mar 2014
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posted July 15, 2014 06:05 PM
I think cheating isn't always premeditated. I've had deep conversations with people who have cheated on their partners, and most of them say that they never truthfully intended to do it. (I understand it doesn't just "happen", but I mean they didn't go to that party with the intentions to cheat, befriend so and so with the intention to cheat, etc). I personally haven't cheated on someone but I can't say that I never would. I certainly can see myself cheating under certain circumstances. Is it the best option? No, but sh*t happens sometimes. It's no excuse; there is no excuse, and I've been cheated on before so I know exactly how it feels, but it also makes me more realistic to the concept of it. I understand wholeheartedly that it's immature. There are many other ways to go about expressing unhappiness or boredom, or maybe even wanting to spice up your bedroom life or even see other people. You could ask for a break, or just call off the relationship; you don't necessarily have to go behind the other's back and flat out disrespect them. But, it does happen, so I try to reason with those who do it. I have many, many of the placements listed above, so maybe my statement won't hold much weight.. lol... Sun in Taurus, Mercury in Aries, Venus in Aries = 12th house (its ruler is Aries, this is my most dominant house) Moon in Gemini in 1st house Mars in Cancer in 4th house Neptune and Uranus in Cap in 9th house Jupiter in Libra in 6th house Saturn in Aqua in 11th house Sun square Mars, Venus trine Mars, Moon sextile Mars, Mars opposite Uranus/Neptune. Moon semi-sextile Sun, Moon sextile Mars/Venus, Moon trine Jupiter. I agree that there are other things that come into play. Lack of trust, insecurity, impulsiveness, lack of communication, and many other things that go into cheating on someone. I think that maybe some of these traits could be traits of chronic/compulsive cheaters, but I don't think that just anyone with these placements would cheat. Some people just aren't cognitive of how their actions affect others. Some people are blind to how much other people care about them. Maybe it makes them insensitive, maybe it makes them self-absorbed, or maybe it just makes them flawed. Some people (me) don't believe that there is only one person out there for everyone on earth. I don't believe in tying yourself down to one person for the rest of your life, especially if you're as young as I am. I'm sure my outlook will change as I grow older, fall in love more, and mature more, but maybe it won't. I don't blame those who abhor cheating and I don't necessarily ostracize those who are unfaithful. Sorry for the long bible verse lol. IP: Logged |
DeepFreeze unregistered
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posted July 15, 2014 06:06 PM
Yeah don't worry about it. I have a crap ton and I've never. You can be yourself or be your chart. They may be the same or not quite but the choice is yours, always. IP: Logged |
DeepFreeze unregistered
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posted July 15, 2014 06:10 PM
Remember, signs, aspects, etc. They give you traits that may or may not manifest themselves in you. Not all traits of a given placement or aspect fit every person who has it, and free will wins. If you don't want to cheat, don't. IP: Logged |
next to neptune Knowflake Posts: 3104 From: The Moon Registered: Aug 2013
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posted July 15, 2014 06:21 PM
quote: Originally posted by IV XXIV: Some people (me) don't believe that there is only one person out there for everyone on earth. I don't believe in tying yourself down to one person for the rest of your life, especially if you're as young as I am. I'm sure my outlook will change as I grow older, fall in love more, and mature more, but maybe it won't. I don't blame those who abhor cheating and I don't necessarily ostracize those who are unfaithful.Sorry for the long bible verse lol.
I agree…there is many, many many "the one" out there that fit you perfectly and that you could have a good time with. But what when you find your perfect match? Why let him go? It's the most beautiful thing when you look at older couples and see how much they have build up together and how much they have grown - together. It's just always a little bit "difficult" every time you enter a new relationship to think about all those good times you "missed" with each other, because so much time passed by before you even MET each other? So it's a beautiful thing in my eyes to stick together with "the one", the one you feel you have a perfect match with… cause truth is - you might find another "the one" but what about all what you build up through the years? That takes a long time! My grandmother and grandfather is Aqua and Gemini. My grandmother has a pisces moon and the rest of her chart is pretty much Aqua… my grandfather is very much gemini. And they have sticked together for 60 years, and whenever I see them it looked seriously like they are still in love… they are so cute together! And whenever I see them I always remember my grandmothers wisdom: "When you have known a man for some time, you start to see how much you can build on that relationship and that is a wonderful thing" (something like that lol) well ok, I just mean that it's nicer to stay together than to fly around in the universe OK!!!?:P IP: Logged |
starrynight Knowflake Posts: 322 From: Registered: Feb 2014
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posted July 15, 2014 06:37 PM
quote: Originally posted by next to neptune: Wow that is kind of disturbing to read!
You are right about falling out of love, that's my number one reason for ending a relationship. This is also one of my main reasons for the no-cheating rule: if I have an urge to cheat on my partner, then I'm not in love anymore, then it makes no sense to keep the relationship going. That's what I always said to guys: for as long as I'm in love with you, you won't be able to push me away no matter what, but beware the moment my heart cools down, because nothing you do then will make me stay. Things like working on a relationship honestly fly over my head. If I'm in love, I'm not afraid of a difficult relationship, but if I'm not, then in my mind there is nothing to save. I think Capricorn DC is supposed to be much more stable, though, relationship-wise. Saturn itself, though... dunno. I have Saturn (in Libra) conjunct Venus, Saturn trine Moon and Saturn sextile Mars. Still all of the above. But I think it makes me hold onto a relationship while it lasts, you know.
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next to neptune Knowflake Posts: 3104 From: The Moon Registered: Aug 2013
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posted July 15, 2014 06:57 PM
quote: Originally posted by starrynight:You are right about falling out of love, that's my number one reason for ending a relationship. This is also one of my main reasons for the no-cheating rule: if I have an urge to cheat on my partner, then I'm not in love anymore, then it makes no sense to keep the relationship going. That's what I always said to guys: for as long as I'm in love with you, you won't be able to push me away no matter what, but beware the moment my heart cools down, because nothing you do then will make me stay. Things like working on a relationship honestly fly over my head. If I'm in love, I'm not afraid of a difficult relationship, but if I'm not, then in my mind there is nothing to save. I think Capricorn DC is supposed to be much more stable, though, relationship-wise. Saturn itself, though... dunno. I have Saturn (in Libra) conjunct Venus, Saturn trine Moon and Saturn sextile Mars. Still all of the above. But I think it makes me hold onto a relationship while it lasts, you know. [/B]
Well especially the combo moon-uranus and venus-jupiter.. not only do you become distant emotionally after some while, but the jupiter-venus also makes you kind of have an easy time with finding a new partner! (I have the same aspects) I must admit that I have been cheating before but I do believe that you can get past that point in your life, when you meet someone you are not only in love with, but actually feel you can live your life with IP: Logged |
PisceanDream unregistered
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posted July 15, 2014 09:05 PM
quote: The cheaters I have known and know are heavy on the Pisces, Aqua and also quite a few Aries Venus/Mars in there. [/B]
Interesting. I'm a heavy Pisces (Sun, Merc, Venus, Saturn) Mars in Aqua and Asc in Aqua... All the aforementioned planets are in the 1st house, with my Gem moon square venus. On paper, I look like I could easily be a cheater. The reality is I am not, but I am very easily confused and have a heavy tendency to feel either wishy-washy or trapped/bored. The reality is these tend to be the qualities that prompt cheating however this can only be fully put into action by the will. Aries moon/venus is more of an impulsive, heat of the moment kind of cheating. I think venus in Pisces could have the tendency to cheat because of their universal transcendental views on love, the lack of boundaries makes it difficult to be fully and totally committed or pinned down. It's not out of malice but out of some ethereal need to pour out love or martyrdom if the relationship turned sour. All in all, I do think the moon square venus plays a big role in feeling unsatisfied in a relationship, I struggle often with it but have never gone so far as to cheat.
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madgoulding Knowflake Posts: 50 From: new york, ny Registered: Feb 2014
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posted July 15, 2014 09:44 PM
The one I know because I was his one on the sideHim: Sun/merc/venus/asc: gemini Moon/mars: aries He has a 12th house stellium-moon/mars/venus/mercury Jupiter sq venus Moon/mars sq Neptune/uranus Me: Sun/venus/merc: aquarius Moon: taurus Mars:capricorn Asc: libra Sun/venus/mars/neptune/uranus all conjunct each other Moon sq venus Lilith on descendant sq uranus/neptune/mars I also think it had a lot to do with our synastry. His lust conjunct my sun and venus. Vertex conjunct descendent in composite. His mars/moon conjunct my descendent/lilith. His sun/venus conjunct my SN/vertex in my 8th house. His nessus and wild conjunct my ascendent. Anyways I guess Astrologically I could blame the fact that we were "fated" and our little tryst is karmic. I read somewhere that SN/vertex relationships aren't meant to have happy endings but we are supposed to learn from them. And yes, I'm learning A LOT. And whenever I use tarot cards, the moon always comes up like 90% of the time
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Gemini Blues Knowflake Posts: 1437 From: The future... or the past. I get them confused... Registered: May 2014
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posted July 15, 2014 10:03 PM
Just throwin this out there... Maybe we should look for placements that make you less likely to cheat. But the synastry has to matter too.From my personal experience, cardinal signs are the ones more likely to stray. But I think the better question is "what circumstances are more likely to make a given person (or sign) cheat?" IP: Logged |
starrynight Knowflake Posts: 322 From: Registered: Feb 2014
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posted July 15, 2014 11:23 PM
quote: Originally posted by next to neptune: Well especially the combo moon-uranus and venus-jupiter.. not only do you become distant emotionally after some while, but the jupiter-venus also makes you kind of have an easy time with finding a new partner! (I have the same aspects) I must admit that I have been cheating before but I do believe that you can get past that point in your life, when you meet someone you are not only in love with, but actually feel you can live your life with
See, this is where I don't get the relationship thing. To me, it's either "I want this person" or "I don't want this person". No middle ground. I never wonder whether I can live my life with this person, or what will happen to us in a few years. It's all here and now. Maybe it's Uranus ruling both the 7th and the 8th. Or the dominant 5th house. I mean, a different person would have probably wondered whether it's worth leaving an established boyfriend for a guy you've just barely met. Never occurred to me. However, I did know a guy who has been married for 6 years, then one day he went to a coffee shop to grab a cup of coffee, met a woman there, called his wife and told her he was filing for a divorce. She was totally shocked because there were no warning signs, no rocky ground, no cheating, no excessive fighting. Just a normal marriage. I don't have his chart in the archive but it seems there was Uranus on the 7th cusp, too, and a lot of Uranus influence in general. IP: Logged |
Virgoboy Knowflake Posts: 51 From: Registered: Aug 2014
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posted August 14, 2014 06:54 AM
One thing I have noticed on cheater's birth chart is that most of them have north node in the 7th house.IP: Logged |
LeeLoo2014 unregistered
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posted August 14, 2014 09:23 AM
quote: Originally posted by IV XXIV: I think cheating isn't always premeditated. I've had deep conversations with people who have cheated on their partners, and most of them say that they never truthfully intended to do it. (I understand it doesn't just "happen", but I mean they didn't go to that party with the intentions to cheat, befriend so and so with the intention to cheat, etc).
What's that supposed to mean? That we don't control what we do, we don't control our sexual organs? Maybe if you are a 5 year old or an 100 year old who can't control his bladder. Cheating means lying. Obviously one can't lie other people, especially the ones one loves, without creating for themselves a fake life, your whole life becomes a lie. And for those who condone cheating because one gets "bored" in a relationship or because there are many interesting people out there, who forces you to be in a relationship? Stay single and sleep with a different person every night, if that's what you want...duh! That's just plain hypocrisy. ------------------
I seem to have loved you in numberless forms... IP: Logged |
LeeLoo2014 unregistered
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posted August 14, 2014 09:25 AM
quote: Originally posted by AlexDern: Planets in the second house besides the moon.I notice people with planets in the second house will cheat for the sake of pleasure...where as people with planets else where, it's more of an emotional thing... The second house is ruled by taurus...taurus rules pleasure, beast like lust, but scorpio is more of the I'll get revenge style or flavor.
Interesting. Why "besides the Moon"? ------------------
I seem to have loved you in numberless forms... IP: Logged |
theunknown Knowflake Posts: 3182 From: Registered: Dec 2010
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posted August 14, 2014 09:29 AM
I have all the cheater aspects, I supposeIP: Logged |
libran_dream Knowflake Posts: 587 From: Registered: Nov 2011
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posted August 14, 2014 09:43 AM
There's that saying that a man is only as loyal as his options. It's a cliche, but I think it holds a lot of psychological truth. (I do not see this as being gender-based, replace "man" here with "person", "his" with "their")To me, when a person is in a relationship where they gave their word on their loyalty, there are, in essence, 3 things that you look for to see if they stay true to their word: A. The "OPTIONS" - How attractive are they? Do people throw themselves on them? Basically, how much energy is needed to stay loyal? Is it really easy - limited in options for romantic partners, or does it take a lot of effort and a lot of saying no - an attractive person, great charm, a people pleaser. (For anything in life, the path of least resistance is the most likely end-result, so here you're looking at, basically, resistance.) For attractiveness, I'm thinking you'd be looking at the connection between AC, Venus, Mars, Moon, Sun and some asteroids, as well as elements and chart patterns. Then you look at things that stop a person when given the option to cheat, which is basically twofold:
B. The "BREAKS" 1. DISCIPLINE - How do they view order in the world, what do they think about legal and social mores, how do they view themselves in the grand scheme of human laws and philosophy? What do they think they "owe" the world around them? I would look at the outer planets here, especially Jupiter and Saturn, and their interaction with the Sun. 2. EMPATHY - Even if you're not a very disciplined and principled person, understanding how much your partner might suffer as a consequence of disloyalty would stop someone. On the other hand, if you're not very in touch with your own feelings, you won't understand others' very well either. To understand this about someone, I'd look at the Moon and H4 and anything water-influenced in the chart in general. I want to stress out that for some people, empathy and love in a relationship are not the same thing. There are lots of people who love their partners, know their partners love them, but still don't get the emotional hurt they can cause on an inner level. So love does not always equal empathy. Another thing that might stop even a very unprincipled, flighty person is lots and lots and LOTS of aspects in a synastric chart, where just one person would hold their attention on so many levels they'd not have a lot of energy to go hunt outside of the relationship. But that is very rare, and of course, things can fizzle out if growth does not happen. Just my opinion though, of course.
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LeeLoo2014 unregistered
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posted August 14, 2014 10:19 AM
quote: Originally posted by libran_dream: There's that saying that a man is only as loyal as his options. It's a cliche, but I think it holds a lot of psychological truth.
I disagree. And yes, it is a sexist cliche. I disagree because I know more women who cheat than men who cheat. Some people, either men or women, are loyal by nature, are not liars by nature. Gender is not an issue anymore in this matter, since women liberation. Women didn't cheat as much as men before because they couldn't, not because they are more loyal by nature. Also, some people love sex and love and these people, obviously, don't like to have casual sex with strangers just because they love it, they are sensual by nature. Most cheaters, men or women, are people for whom sex, intimacy and love play a little role in their lives, thus they can easily use sex as a substitute for other physical/psychological issues: release of bodily fluids, insecurity/the illusion of being attractive to the opposite sex for one hour or so, the need to prove to oneself one can still be attractive to the opposite sex, using other people's body for getting off etc, a general minimalist, cold and detached approach to sex and love because of their lack of eroticism. ------------------
I seem to have loved you in numberless forms... IP: Logged |
libran_dream Knowflake Posts: 587 From: Registered: Nov 2011
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posted August 14, 2014 10:22 AM
I did starrynight's patented Cheater's Chart © for fun.  *Gemini placements - yes, MARS(con. Chiron) *afflicted Venus - yes, Venus in detriment and sq. Neptune *aspect from Moon to Venus - yes, trine *aspect from Mars to Neptune - yes, inconjunction *Mars in Gemini, Pisces or Sagittarius - yes *aspect from Venus to Jupiter - yes, sextile(wide) *Moon and Venus in mutable signs - yes, Moon *Moon-Jupiter aspects - yes, sextile *3rd house placements - 2 outer planets, Moon close to cusp from 2nd *5th house placements - no, empty *Mercury, Uranus, Neptune, Mars in 5th/7th/12th - Mercury in H7 *harsh Uranus aspects - yes, opp. Mars(wide), con. Moon, inconj. Sun *Moon in harsh aspect to Mars - yes, Moon opp. Mars *any aspects from Uranus to Moon or Venus - yes, conj. Moon, trine Venus(wide) *Uranus rules the 7th house - no, Mars(in Gemini)
For reference, I have never cheated, never would, under no circumstances. (I guess Taurus Sun in H8, conjunct NN, opposite SCO Saturn) IP: Logged |
libran_dream Knowflake Posts: 587 From: Registered: Nov 2011
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posted August 14, 2014 10:26 AM
quote: Originally posted by LeeLoo2014: I disagree. And yes, it is a sexist cliche. I disagree because I know more women who cheat than men who cheat. Some people, either men or women, are loyal by nature, are not liars by nature. Gender is not an issue anymore in this matter, since women liberation. Women didn't cheat as much as men before because they couldn't, not because they are more loyal by nature.
Of course, I agree with you. The quote is nominally about men, but I take it to apply to both men and women, I should have stressed that. Sometimes you assume things go without saying, when they in fact don't. So it's a matter of a lack of clarity in my communication. Lying has no gender. I'll edit for clarity. IP: Logged |
ariestaurus Knowflake Posts: 426 From: Registered: Feb 2013
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posted August 14, 2014 11:33 AM
I'm going to generalize here, but I have not known Sagittarius-influenced men (esp Sun, Moon, Venus in Sag) to be faithful. Of course, this cannot apply to All Sag men (but can definitely be applied to the ones I know!)Other than that, I'm not sure. I agree that the whole chart needs to be analyzed. Even so, it's still no guarantee... IP: Logged |
Doux Rêve Knowflake Posts: 9926 From: Registered: Dec 2010
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posted August 14, 2014 12:03 PM
I think everyone is a potential cheater.Natal, progressions, transits, can all trigger such tendencies. That basically means that there's no guarantee whatsoever that you can find in astrology as to someone's loyalty.
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