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Author
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Topic: Dumper and Dumpee : ))
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geminigal2805
Knowflake Posts: 1348
From:
Registered: Sep 2013
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posted August 27, 2014 03:06 AM
  
I have no clue what the dating world is terming these people. But i have seen a pattern here.
Maybe this paragraph will explain it better. I think i was a dumper... atleast i like to think like that. One failed relationship where this scorpio sun,gemini moon bf cheated on me. I dumped him. Got back together. Cheat me/dump u cycle went on for a few years. So technically Im the dumper right?
Then i dated a taurus sun guy and i dumped him just like that. Even at the beginning of many 'couldhavebeenrelationships' i always took few steps back to avoid the person.I know i was very self absorbed during my single days. But i always called the final shots in a relationship. Surprisingly I wasnt like this with my gal friends.
Now i have a sweet aries sun,moon,merc guy friend and he is always the Dumpee. Another friend. A pisces sun. A dumpee.
Do we come with something written all over us that says, 'aww plss dump me,dump me cuz i dont know to dump you'
??Are you a dumpee or a dumper?
BTW Is there a better term to define what im trying to say? These words sound a bit rude : ( IP: Logged |
BellaFenice
Knowflake Posts: 3402
From: Neptune with PisceanDream, Faith, and Meissieri
Registered: Sep 2013
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posted August 27, 2014 03:13 AM
I'm a dumper. I was actually thinking about this recently. I'm not sure of a better wording for this either. IP: Logged |
hannaramaa
Moderator Posts: 10644
From:
Registered: Nov 2011
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posted August 27, 2014 03:15 AM
I think the terminology is fineI'm usually the dumper - Gemini ASC, Aries Sun, Taurus moon. No time like the present if it isn't working for me.  However, I always assume I have stronger feelings than the other person and it takes me some time to recover from it all because I analyze too much whereas the other people get dumped but they seem fine. IP: Logged |
geminigal2805
Knowflake Posts: 1348
From:
Registered: Sep 2013
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posted August 27, 2014 04:07 AM
quote:
Originally posted by BellaFenice:
I'm a dumper. I was actually thinking about this recently. I'm not sure of a better wording for this either.
@Hi BF, do u have anything in Aries? Gemini? Sag? I have noticed them(among ppl i know) to be the dumpers. Except for that Aries sun,merc,moon guy. IP: Logged |
geminigal2805
Knowflake Posts: 1348
From:
Registered: Sep 2013
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posted August 27, 2014 04:13 AM
quote:
Originally posted by hannaramaa:
I think the terminology is fineI'm usually the dumper - Gemini ASC, Aries Sun, Taurus moon. No time like the present if it isn't working for me. However, I always assume I have stronger feelings than the other person and it takes me some time to recover from it all because I analyze too much whereas the other people get dumped but they seem fine.
hannaramma I get what you are saying. Once we invest emotionally,it is difficult to get away from that person.
Some ppl even when they see clear warnings that its not gonna go anywhere, refuse to dump. Even when they feel they are about to get dumped,they wait to get dumped. If it were me,I would dump them first so my ego wouldnt get bruised so badly. I feel the dumpee gets hurt far more than the dumper. Somewhere it hurts. Badly. IP: Logged |
Aries23Degrees
Knowflake Posts: 2571
From: South Africa
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted August 27, 2014 04:45 AM
I was always the "dumper". But then I got "dumped" once and thought,"this isn't as humiliating as I imagined."But i know of a lot of people who would not cope well if they were the "dumped".
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12muddy
Knowflake Posts: 2484
From:
Registered: Feb 2013
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posted August 27, 2014 06:00 AM
Mutual break-ups in my case. IP: Logged |
margym0o
Knowflake Posts: 579
From: Canada
Registered: Jul 2014
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posted August 27, 2014 10:17 AM
Gemini Sun/Scorpio Moon/Virgo ASCI've always been the "dumper" so to speak though a couple times even though I was the instigator, the conversation ended being more mutual. The only time I have ever been flat out "dumped" was my first love in high school and that was no picnic. I seem to only have long-term relationships and I am very good at keeping things consistent up until the very end - aka very few red flags - so it tends to seem to come out of nowhere. I think this is because it takes a lot for me to get to that point but once I'm out, it's hard to go back. IP: Logged |
MineAgain
Knowflake Posts: 2120
From:
Registered: Nov 2013
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posted August 27, 2014 10:31 AM
I'm always the dumpee - at first. Then they come back around and I become the dumper.It happened with a Pisces, a Taurus and a Gemini. Scorpio Sun - Cancer Rising - Gemini Moon - Scorpio Venus IP: Logged |
mamawolf
Knowflake Posts: 242
From: the universe
Registered: Aug 2012
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posted August 27, 2014 11:42 AM
I tend to let relationships go on for way too long,until there's no room in it for me anymore. (Taurus Asc. Cap Sun?) Ugh to the point where they have to point out that things are weird and I finally come clean. I was a dumper with a Libra and Cancer and got dumped by Pisces. The Pisces relationship in general was just weird and vulnerable to being with but I got over it really quickly. Yet again it's really easy to when you let things ride out for that long -_-Sag Venus Aries Mars Aqua Moon/Mercury IP: Logged |
ariestaurus
Knowflake Posts: 426
From:
Registered: Feb 2013
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posted August 27, 2014 12:19 PM
I'm always the dumper.When I'm in a relationship, I give more than I take. I strive to make sure my guy is always happy, but this is often at the expense of my own needs. This gets tiring, then I dump them. IP: Logged |
Sagical
Knowflake Posts: 259
From: Glenbow, Canada
Registered: Mar 2014
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posted August 27, 2014 12:57 PM
Dumper, most of the time. Dumped a few times and that hurt. Maybe uranus in the 5th is the indicator here.IP: Logged |
hannaramaa
Moderator Posts: 10644
From:
Registered: Nov 2011
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posted August 27, 2014 01:52 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Sagical:
Dumper, most of the time. Dumped a few times and that hurt. Maybe uranus in the 5th is the indicator here.
Same and I have Uranus in the 7th IP: Logged |
margym0o
Knowflake Posts: 579
From: Canada
Registered: Jul 2014
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posted August 27, 2014 02:18 PM
quote:
Originally posted by ariestaurus:
When I'm in a relationship, I give more than I take. I strive to make sure my guy is always happy, but this is often at the expense of my own needs. This gets tiring, then I dump them.
Same. What are your placements? Any Venus/Saturn aspects by chance? IP: Logged |
bansheequeen
Knowflake Posts: 1492
From: Beachville, USA
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted August 27, 2014 04:13 PM
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DEAR MODS IT IS NOT HARD TO LET PEOPLE DELETE THEIR OWN POSTS THINK ABOUT ADDING THAT FEAURE IN THE FUTURE K? MAKE THE BOARD A CLEANER PLACE. I AM JUST TRYING TO GET RID OF MY POSSSSTTTSSSS SO BORINGmiddle finger cause maybe yall might get motivated to give people A DELETE FEATURE IF THE LACK OF ONE CAUSES UGLY POSTS IP: Logged |
bansheequeen
Knowflake Posts: 1492
From: Beachville, USA
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted August 27, 2014 04:16 PM
....................../´¯/)
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............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸
........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\
........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...')
.........\.................'...../
..........''...\.......... _.·´
............\..............(
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DEAR MODS IT IS NOT HARD TO LET PEOPLE DELETE THEIR OWN POSTS THINK ABOUT ADDING THAT FEAURE IN THE FUTURE K? MAKE THE BOARD A CLEANER PLACE. I AM JUST TRYING TO GET RID OF MY POSSSSTTTSSSS SO BORINGmiddle finger cause maybe yall might get motivated to give people A DELETE FEATURE IF THE LACK OF ONE CAUSES UGLY POSTS IP: Logged |
hannaramaa
Moderator Posts: 10644
From:
Registered: Nov 2011
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posted August 27, 2014 07:55 PM
quote:
Originally posted by bansheequeen:
I think is usually women are the dumper, men at the dumpee. It's how I've always seen it work out.
Only because there are few men who will rise to the challenge of dumping a woman by being direct with her. Most of the time men decide theyre unhappy and slowly increase ****** behavior over time until the woman is like "Yeah I don't think its working out." IP: Logged |
Sandra018
Knowflake Posts: 540
From: Brooklyn,NY
Registered: Dec 2012
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posted August 27, 2014 08:18 PM
I'm the dumpee-
too much aries energy lol
aries sun,mars,merc,venus  IP: Logged |
Solar_Leo_Queen
Knowflake Posts: 2408
From: Planet Earth
Registered: Jan 2014
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posted August 27, 2014 09:06 PM
I'm usually the dumper and most of the relationships I've ended could've been really good ones, too.IP: Logged |
geminigal2805
Knowflake Posts: 1348
From:
Registered: Sep 2013
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posted August 28, 2014 10:17 AM
quote:
Originally posted by MineAgain:
I'm always the dumpee - at first. Then they come back around and I become the dumper.It happened with a Pisces, a Taurus and a Gemini. Scorpio Sun - Cancer Rising - Gemini Moon - Scorpio Venus
Lol!
Ok when they came back, did you plan to dump them later on? Or did u just lose interest when they came back?
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geminigal2805
Knowflake Posts: 1348
From:
Registered: Sep 2013
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posted August 28, 2014 10:19 AM
quote:
Originally posted by hannaramaa:
Only because there are few men who will rise to the challenge of dumping a woman by being direct with her. Most of the time men decide theyre unhappy and slowly increase ****** behavior over time until the woman is like "Yeah I don't think its working out."
IP: Logged |
geminigal2805
Knowflake Posts: 1348
From:
Registered: Sep 2013
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posted August 28, 2014 10:23 AM
quote:
Originally posted by hannaramaa:
Only because there are few men who will rise to the challenge of dumping a woman by being direct with her. Most of the time men decide theyre unhappy and slowly increase ****** behavior over time until the woman is like "Yeah I don't think its working out."
Is this where the guy thinks, 'Why hasnt she dumped me YET? Maybe she will if I sleep with her friend ?' IP: Logged |
hannaramaa
Moderator Posts: 10644
From:
Registered: Nov 2011
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posted August 28, 2014 10:28 AM
quote:
Originally posted by geminigal2805:
Is this where the guy thinks, 'Why hasnt she dumped me YET? Maybe she will if I sleep with her friend ?'
Possibly, but that sounds more like impulse than "I want out." but lately I've been seeing a few stories in the news about fiancee faking their death so they don't have to go through with the wedding, or guys faking a kidnapping so they can spend a night out with the boys. Seriously weird to me that you'd marry someone you can't even communicate with. IP: Logged |
geminigal2805
Knowflake Posts: 1348
From:
Registered: Sep 2013
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posted August 28, 2014 10:49 AM
quote:
Originally posted by hannaramaa:
Possibly, but that sounds more like impulse than "I want out." but lately I've been seeing a few stories in the news about fiancee faking their death so they don't have to go through with the wedding, or guys faking a kidnapping so they can spend a night out with the boys. Seriously weird to me that you'd marry someone you can't even communicate with.
Faking a kidnapping for a stag party is not unheard of. Infact it is pretty common. But for a boys night out?Ewww..
A reason could be this. Few years ago,men called the shots. They were the sole providers. A woman's place was in the kitchen. And they hardly had any say regarding their husband's outings. Nowadays women are bossier and they demand an equal relationship. So men resort to lies.
But how many times can a man manage to get kidnapped?
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