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Author
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Topic: Saturn in 4th people - how do you open up to people?
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NeptunianSag
Knowflake Posts: 1260
From: Your imagination
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted October 20, 2014 12:16 PM
  
Anyone else feel defensive/guarded with this placement, like when someone tries to get close to you, you feel uneasy/awkward and feel emotionally empty/stuck. Then when you push people away you feel even more lonely/emotionless, can't win either way :/ or your just afraid to let people know how you feel incase they use your weaknesses against you. How do you find what it is that makes you feel good? I just feel empty a lot like nothing can satisfy me. My Venus in aqua is in the 4th conjunct Saturn so it feels even worse. IP: Logged |
Kibriana
Knowflake Posts: 181
From: Zagreb, Croatia
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted October 20, 2014 06:07 PM
I don't think I necessarily push people away, but it does take a lot of time for me to get comfortable enough to start talking about my problems or my many insecurities. But, I am a loner, I don't feel the need to keep in touch with most people, even if I like them and enjoy spending time with them.I literally have to force myself to call or text my dearest and nearest, which is pretty messed up, when you come to think about it.
I'm also socially awkward, feeling really uncomfortable when I have to maintain a conversation with people I don't know well. I just feel really stressed and anxious. Last week, for example, I was at a wedding where I didn't know most of the guests, and wasn't really close to the ones I did know. I tried to make friends with a Cancer girl, but she showed no desire in getting to know me (even though she was more than eager to talk about herself!). At one point, I gave up, I walked away and spent the entire evening sitting at the table, staring at other guests having fun. The scariest part was that I actually felt perfectly ok with that. IP: Logged |
Gracha
Knowflake Posts: 187
From: NY USA
Registered: Jan 2013
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posted October 20, 2014 07:22 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Kibriana:
I don't think I necessarily push people away, but it does take a lot of time for me to get comfortable enough to start talking about my problems or my many insecurities. But, I am a loner, I don't feel the need to keep in touch with most people, even if I like them and enjoy spending time with them.I literally have to force myself to call or text my dearest and nearest, which is pretty messed up, when you come to think about
I can totally relate to this, I have venus opposite saturn/pluto in 4th house. I just don't feel the need to open up to anyone. I want the people I'm "close" with to show emotional maturity that's the first thing I look for in relationships. IP: Logged |
ash20
Knowflake Posts: 732
From:
Registered: Mar 2013
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posted October 21, 2014 09:01 PM
Sun/saturn in 4th and I can relate to both neptuniansag and kibriana. I especially feel closed off from my family as a kid I never felt like I came from a warm loving family. It always and still does feel negative and cold. I've learned not to be so open..IP: Logged |
magicspells
Knowflake Posts: 243
From:
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted October 22, 2014 02:56 AM
4th house moon conjunct saturn. I keep my emotions close. Tbh, no one knows my true emotions about anything. I wouldn't divulge them to anyone I didn't think would understand where I was coming from.IP: Logged |
bansheequeen
Knowflake Posts: 818
From: Beachville, USA
Registered: Jan 2012
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posted October 22, 2014 10:23 AM
I dont. Well to most people I never do. To my boyfriend I did, not completely, but even to get to this point it took a long time. Still my gut reaction when he asks me how I'm feeling right now at the moment is to avoid answering until I'm done feeling the emotion. Im only ok with letting others know what I'm feline after the feElina has passed.IP: Logged |
Kibriana
Knowflake Posts: 181
From: Zagreb, Croatia
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted October 22, 2014 04:18 PM
quote:
Originally posted by ash20:
I especially feel closed off from my family as a kid I never felt like I came from a warm loving family. It always and still does feel negative and cold. I've learned not to be so open..
Same here. I was well-provided for by my parents, but I never got much love or cuddling. My sister got married when I was very young, so I hadn't got a chance to form close personal relations with her. Nowdays, my mother is trying to get close to me, but it feels fake and way too late.
IP: Logged |
Kibriana
Knowflake Posts: 181
From: Zagreb, Croatia
Registered: Nov 2012
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posted October 22, 2014 04:20 PM
Opening up is difficult. I don't know about the rest of you, but I don't really feel the need to be open about my emotions. IP: Logged |
NeptunianSag
Knowflake Posts: 1260
From: Your imagination
Registered: Aug 2013
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posted October 22, 2014 04:32 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Kibriana:
Same here. I was well-provided for by my parents, but I never got much love or cuddling. My sister got married when I was very young, so I hadn't got a chance to form close personal relations with her. Nowdays, my mother is trying to get close to me, but it feels fake and way too late.
Yep same, my parents are not bad people, they didn't abuse me or neglect me, but when i needed comfort and confidence boosting, nope, i've never gotten any of it. IP: Logged |
hodad
Knowflake Posts: 285
From: tiburon ca usa
Registered: May 2009
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posted January 28, 2015 09:07 AM
It didn't affect me so much in that way as it was difficult to go to friends' houses and see their open and loving family relationships and feel a warm vibe from their home life in general,lots of comings and goings,mothers constantly doting on them,etc etc and realizing my home life was not like that at all.Saturn in the 4th is usually a bummer for your home life,so that could really be a factor in opening up to others who have it really different.IP: Logged |
Barbiegirl19
Moderator Posts: 5314
From: Pluto with DeepFreeze
Registered: Jul 2013
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posted January 28, 2015 10:42 AM
I don't really. I'm very guarded, I refuse to allow any vulnerability. I don't want anyone to hold anything against me. I want to help others, I don't want help for myself. It also doesn't help me very much with Saturn being retrograde. It's pretty aspected in my chart being in Aqua. Opening up has always been the biggest problem for me. Until I fully trust the person, I'll let them talk all day about themselves lol. It takes A LOT to earn my trust and until you have I won't disclose anything deep. If something that I've overcome may help a person, then I'll drop the walls and do all that I can to help that person. I actually do love talking and getting to know people. I am outgoing and love to make people laugh. I'm not shy or afraid of approaching people. I just give them the fun, bubbly side of me, not the deep, mutilated one. My chart is one huge contradiction. IP: Logged |
Lindaland
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