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Author Topic:   Attracting unavailable men/women?
FireMoon
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posted December 07, 2014 03:41 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for FireMoon     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Ok let's just say hypothetically lol... What in the natal chart (hence why I'm not posting this in IA, although I realize it may be moved there) would indicate this?

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ikja
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posted December 07, 2014 04:10 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for ikja     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
My love life is forever in turmoil.
I put it down to my Venus opposite Pluto.
There's always some kind of drama.
The guy is usually lukewarm or has ISSUES that I'm saddled with.

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FireMoon
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posted December 07, 2014 05:00 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for FireMoon     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
^hmm what signs/houses are your Venus opposite Pluto, if you don't mind me asking?

I have mars opp pluto (in 5th house) but it's wide, and moon in 5th sextile venus in 8th (which is my 5th house ruler).. it seems anytime I meet an honest to god "soulmate".. he just so happens to be taken at the time. I'll probably delete this later but just thought I'd share I guess, and would like to know what else could be attracting this (since obviously this must have something to do with my own placements/personality.)

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babybull82
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posted December 07, 2014 05:23 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for babybull82     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Venus in Pisces, venus square neptune usually wants what's unobtainable...which in some respects is ok because some of them would prefer to fantasize about a relationship than actually being in one.

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mollywu
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posted December 07, 2014 06:11 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for mollywu     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I don't know if Pisces DSC can cause it or not because I attracted unavailable men often.

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LeeLoo2014
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From: Venus cornering Neptune
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posted December 07, 2014 06:40 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for LeeLoo2014     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Attracting them or going after them?

Because if you attract them, they're not that unavailable for you, right??

If we're talking about being attracted to unavailable people and hanging in there despite the impossibility or the unrequited factor, I think this is a very interesting subject that has a lot to do with Neptune and Pluto in the natal chart.

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I seem to have loved you in numberless forms...

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NeptunianSag
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posted December 07, 2014 09:03 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for NeptunianSag     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
My 7th house ruler (mars) is opposite Neptune, I always get a feeling men in relationships like me. Also I have progressed Venus in Pisces square pluto that may effect it too.

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FireMoon
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posted December 07, 2014 10:47 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for FireMoon     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by LeeLoo2014:
Attracting them or going after them?

Because if you attract them, they're not that unavailable for you, right??

If we're talking about being attracted to unavailable people and hanging in there despite the impossibility or the unrequited factor, I think this is a very interesting subject that has a lot to do with Neptune and Pluto in the natal chart.


Attracting them... I did go after it once (with the Cancer guy I always talk about and the details are quite scandalous tbh which is why I don't really elaborate-I was unavailable too at the time) But I was really young and things ended badly to say the least, so I've been burned and definitely learned my lesson.

Anyway now there is another guy who is very present in my life through mutual friends/unavoidable circumstances and the attraction (on both ends) is glaringly obvious. But as I said I've learned my lesson and wouldn't go near that situation or act on it, and doubt he would either.

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FireMoon
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posted December 07, 2014 10:49 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for FireMoon     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
@mollywu, yep, I have Neptune conjunct DSC lol

@NeptunianSag, ooo yeah I forgot about progressed venus in Pisces. I have this too and it's currently square my natal moon and being chased by tNeptune. Fun fun...

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ikja
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posted December 07, 2014 11:04 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for ikja     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
My venus is in taurus (6h) and pluto in scorpio (12h) x

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ikja
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posted December 07, 2014 11:05 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for ikja     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by NeptunianSag:
My 7th house ruler (mars) is opposite Neptune, I always get a feeling men in relationships like me. Also I have progressed Venus in Pisces square pluto that may effect it too.

My Mars is square my neptune natally. Possibility this could be something lol

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hannaramaa
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posted December 07, 2014 12:07 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for hannaramaa     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Oh lawd,

Mars in the 12th house
Sun square Neptune
Venus square Neptune
Neptune in the 7th house
Sun square Saturn
Venus square Saturn
Saturn in the 7th
Venus in the 11th (I don't get to see my interests often or under the right circumstances. I think being in the 11th house adds a bit of Uranian flavor to Venus, having Venus in Aries, and then is supported by Uranus in the 7th. There's just complications - Uranus - Obstacles (Saturn) - and hoping for the best or having to let it go when it could've been good (Neptune).)

I feel like I can never get away from this. I've been trying to figure out how I'M unavailable so I can free myself from this pattern, and it perhaps has to do with me not expressing my true feelings - Venus square Saturn, Moon opposite Pluto.

Then again I feel like I could pick any romantic situation out and give an astrological reason for it, so I'm trying to draw a line between astrology and real life.

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LeeLoo2014
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From: Venus cornering Neptune
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posted December 07, 2014 02:12 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for LeeLoo2014     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by FireMoon:
Attracting them... I did go after it once (with the Cancer guy I always talk about and the details are quite scandalous tbh which is why I don't really elaborate-I was unavailable too at the time) But I was really young and things ended badly to say the least, so I've been burned and definitely learned my lesson.

Anyway now there is another guy who is very present in my life through mutual friends/unavoidable circumstances and the attraction (on both ends) is glaringly obvious. But as I said I've learned my lesson and wouldn't go near that situation or act on it, and doubt he would either.


I'm not sure what you mean by "attracting" unavailable people, because to me it means when someone feels attracted to you and wants you, it means he's available to you, so he does want something from you, even if it's an affair, a fling, a flirt, whatever so

If you're talking about men/women having a partner but looking for something on the side, I'm not sure it has anything to do with your own chart, I mean this happens to many attractive women/men, to receive the attention and various proposals from people of all kinds: married, unmarried, single, not single etc. all throughout their lives...well, at least as long as they're attractive lol

Perhaps sexy people - people with "hot" placements- receive more unwanted attraction than the others though.

Also, when we are flirty, interested in casual relationships, we attract lots of people, single or not. Being a duplicated Gemini 5th, I experienced this as well lol I even experimented with it at some point.

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I seem to have loved you in numberless forms...

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hannaramaa
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posted December 07, 2014 02:45 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for hannaramaa     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Even if a person is attracted to you, that doesn't mean they're available for a relationship. Single people could have issues like depression, drugs, alcohol, family, etc. that prevent them from being completely in the relationship and giving it their all.

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LeeLoo2014
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From: Venus cornering Neptune
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posted December 07, 2014 03:06 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for LeeLoo2014     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by hannaramaa:
Even if a person is attracted to you, that doesn't mean they're available for a relationship. Single people could have issues like depression, drugs, alcohol, family, etc. that prevent them from being completely in the relationship and giving it their all.


Is this addressed to me?

I wasn't saying they want a relationship, but they are attracted, so they show it somehow: how else do you know they're attracted? They show it because they flirt with you, they make propositions to you, they ogle you, they invite you on a date, etc. And if we're talking about men here, if they really are attracted to you, they usually DO something, unless they completely and utterly want to be single and do drugs or alcohol or babysit their nephews, as you describe.

So I was just trying to determine what is the theme here, because all themes related to this topic interest me:

are we talking about being attracted to unavailable men/women as a theme in one's life?

or having all kinds of people, including "unavailable" ones (which I suppose means "in a relationship"), being attracted to you and making passes at you, of various kinds?


because these are two different themes, with different astrology

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I seem to have loved you in numberless forms...

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Barbiegirl19
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From: Pluto with DeepFreeze
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posted December 07, 2014 04:40 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Barbiegirl19     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
This was the story of my life. No idea what in my chart would contribute this, my 12th house stellium, Neptune square my Asc possibly.

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sweet-scorpion
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posted December 07, 2014 05:03 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for sweet-scorpion     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I agree that hazy, unclear relationships are present with Neptune contacts in the natal chart, especially in the synastry between two people.

Neptune, when it touches the romantic/sexual planets [Venus and Mars, respectively], can make all matters of the heart--and of sex--confusing, vague, dreamy, idealized... the list goes on. This also goes for having either or both planets in Pisces. With these placements and aspects, one has a higher chance of attracting and being attracted to unavailable people, or people who are distant, even shady.

Having either of these planets in the 12th, as well, can also point to consistent turmoil with secret relationships. Neptune can create secrecy since it casts a fog onto what it touches. Anyone with any of these aforementioned placements may have the struggle of being attracted to someone who flirts back, wants sex and romance, etc. but only if the relationship remains a secret.

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Iced8Ace
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posted December 07, 2014 05:13 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Iced8Ace     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hi Firemoon,

In my experience, an aspect that does this is Venus in hard aspect to Pluto. I have Venus square Pluto at a very tight degree.

I attract unavailable men all the time. Here is a very recent example: A single man had shown interest in me. I was vaguely interested but not enough to commit myself. I take commitment very seriously due to Saturn in my 7th house. He got into a relationship to sort of spite me, I suppose.

It was OK if he did of course because I showed no interest, (commitment phobic) however, the man was STILL in love with me and dating this other girl. People do this - they get into relationships for the wrong reasons. Suddenly, this man became more enticing to me. I wanted him more; not to say I didn't before. He just had more value because he was harder to get. It wasn't even wanting a relationship with him. I knew that. I just wanted to own him, conquer him. I wasn't giving in because I didn't want him to cheat. He needed me to want to. The dilemma became even more enticing.

I hope this makes sense. I have a habit of luring men in, throwing them away and grabbing them again. We want things we can't have -- I think that's the motto of Venus hard aspect Pluto. You become more desirable when you're out of reach and I think that's a bit of psychology we all understand.

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bansheequeen
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posted December 08, 2014 01:09 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for bansheequeen     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
So. I attract men when I'm unavailable. Either when in a relationship or when I am too focused on something else to want a relationship. I have Venus conjunct Neptune and sextile pluto. I also has pisces desc and nn in pisces.

I am the opposite. If the guy seems in any way unavailable I just get completely turned off. Maybe it's the virgo pisces axis? I only want it if something real can come out of it but the people that are drawn to me just want a fantasy? Don't know.

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coffeetime
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posted December 08, 2014 02:59 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for coffeetime     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Do you mean attracting unavailable men - like attracting them into your life, but not getting anything more than this? They just kind of ARE, but not yours. You can like them, think whatever you want - they are not yours, unavailable (emotionally, physically etc).

If yes, then find a Venus-Uranus placement if u have one.

Because it's my life story I feel you, bro....

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FireMoon
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posted December 08, 2014 03:35 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for FireMoon     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
edit

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lovehate122
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posted December 09, 2014 11:35 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for lovehate122     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by NeptunianSag:
My 7th house ruler (mars) is opposite Neptune, I always get a feeling men in relationships like me. Also I have progressed Venus in Pisces square pluto that may effect it too.

Omg me too , I have neptune conjunct my ascendant and in my first house and I always attract men in relationships , ive been in countless situations where im the other women

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