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Author Topic:   Attracting "dark situations" w/ Men
Plutonian_Gal8
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posted December 20, 2014 11:18 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Plutonian_Gal8     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
This is a very sensitive subject for me, but I am compelled to share it and I'm hopeful, in possibly gaining knowledge via chart aspects. Presently in the process of figuring out my birth time, so I can't concretely resurrect a chart anymore, for proper interpretation But highlighting common themes of the chart on this subject would really help me.


As a teenager, I was molested by my father. Of course this is a serious scar psychologically (and then some) but I've managed to persevere against the odds. There's more to this, than just him. I can recall when I was about -- maybe 5 -- when a small neighborhood kid who had behavioral issues threw me down on the ground outside and jumped on top of me, groping me. I felt so scared and disgusted, to be so very young. It felt so very wrong. That memory NEVER left me and it was the genesis in all others that followed later IMO.

I remember my father's GF; her son is about 10 yrs older than I. I had a crush on him but it was never obvious. My brothers always teased me about it, but again I never made it obvious. I must've been about 14 and I was sleeping in the living room on the floor by the christmas tree in the GF's home. I was awakened by her son (who was then in his early 20's) trying to slowly pull my shorts down. When I awakened I just quickly pulled my garments back up and kept saying no. Very bizarre of him to suddenly do that to me. He never before, gave me any indication that I was maybe "cute" to him. C'mon I was a little girl. But yes, I was developed at that time.


I won't go into a lot of details about the father. What he subjected me to lasted between 12-13yrs of age. While many young ladies suffer worse than what I did, it doesn't negate the damage of it being by my father. Smh


Eventually (again) I was about 17, and I had to live with extended relatives. They had a nephew (late 20's) who lived in the basement. He of course, gradually would always slowly come on to me. Inappropriate comments, grabbing at my arm etc.


There is SOMETHING about me, that attracted inappropriate sexual overtures and molestation. Though by nature I am a tomboy and it is my comfort, I can also say, I repress my feminine appeal intentionally more often than not. I don't want to dress the way I could dress, because I don't want to attract the WRONG guys. I despise the comments - however innocent they may be - I have a sharp defense mechanism towards any males that desire to strike up conversation. It's a hurtful reality to think back at the obvious theme here.


I don't know the birth time of the father; I wish I did because I want to understand SO bad how ppl like him do what they do and why I as his daughter, drew it out of him, to be his victim.

Help me here pls…

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wheresthemoon
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From: Texas
Registered: Aug 2014

posted December 20, 2014 11:31 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for wheresthemoon     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I'm so sorry you've been through all of that😕 while certain things in your chart can sort of attract these kinds of experiences, I assure you it is nothing "about you" or the way you carry yourself. It's nothing that you're doing wrong. When someone abuses, it's because they are an abuser.

That said, do you have a hard Venus/Pluto or Mars/Pluto aspect? Where is your Pluto and Mars in the chart? Do you have any prominent Nessus or Dejanira asteroid aspects, and where are those asteroids?

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Plutonian_Gal8
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posted December 20, 2014 11:39 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Plutonian_Gal8     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Wheresthemoon, thank you for the reassurance gesture. I understand what you're saying. I truly don't want to come off like "it's my fault" because deep down I don't feel that way. Just seems that the universe can present certain situations and astrologically I view it as a puzzle. I seek to understand many things.


Venus/Pluto doesn't aspect in my chart, and that Mars/Pluto is in Scorpio but wide out.

I can't be of substantial help, because the chart I thought was mines for years, doesn't seem to be correct. I may be a total different Asc now. I'm torn between 2 charts.

I have both charts in my face right now, and I'm about to add those asteroids…

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lisalisa
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posted December 20, 2014 11:40 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for lisalisa     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Are you scorpio rising?

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Plutonian_Gal8
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posted December 20, 2014 11:41 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Plutonian_Gal8     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by lisalisa:
Are you scorpio rising?

I've always thought I was Scorpio Rising. I am no longer sure. I'm now comparing this Asc with Capricorn Asc.

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Lonake
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posted December 20, 2014 11:44 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lonake     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I guess it might reflect your Mars/Saturn in Scorp that's square your Sun.

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Plutonian_Gal8
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posted December 20, 2014 11:52 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Plutonian_Gal8     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Lonake:
I guess it might reflect your Mars/Saturn in Scorp that's square your Sun.

Would these squares, primarily emphasize "internal conflicts" more than external? Or both? Only asking to perceive it better than I'm trying to interpret on my own.

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Lonake
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posted December 20, 2014 12:09 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lonake     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
They can be externalized so that you'll meet them in the men around you. The internal part becomes the struggle with that masculine energy, but this time your own. The experiences reflect the internal conflict that you then wrestle with. So it's you, but it's also part of the nature of men around you.

Not all of the men and not all of the time.

Now if you had that combo connected to the 7th, or 7th in Scorp for example, then you might meet that struggle a bit more.

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Plutonian_Gal8
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posted December 20, 2014 12:25 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Plutonian_Gal8     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Ok, yeah I get it. Thank you Lonake

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Lonake
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posted December 20, 2014 12:31 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Lonake     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

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