posted February 18, 2015 05:49 PM            

Unfortunately, I don't know what is expected of me by the universe but my upcoming transits covering more or less 2,5 years are clearly showing me that I am stuck in hell.

I am exhausted, feel like I am flirting with manic depression, pretty much I hate my life
and fearing that I might loose my sanity..

It's just love is depleted in me. I feel so cold inside. Bitter - brutal... I feel lonely even though I've got wonderful, great friends who are doing their best to support me.. I have negative thoughts about everything. Cosmic love, shine, internal light you know the new age mentality - I want to puke on it..

Aghhh... and I don't think I can find a way out with these ;

trs.saturn opposite moon & south node (5h/6th hs)

my mom has an unknown neorologic illness - it is very smilar to alzheimer but differing at some points - it has been 4 months... My mom has always been a sore a point in my life, she caused so much pain with her chironic depression and never ending nervous breakdowns for 40 fxcking years - non stop -

The thing is I am extremely finding it hard to be the care giver... I am doing my best but the truth is I am faking it. I think I am not capable of nurturing anything..including myself...

let's get back to the horrible transits I have..

trs. pluto conjucnt venus ( 1st hs )
trs. pluto opposite saturn ( 7th hs )
trs.uranus ( 4th hs ) square venus ( 1st hs)
trs.Uranus ( 4th hs ) square saturn ( 7th hs)

trs. saturn conjunct mars & neptune & north node ( 12th hs - sag )

trs. neptune ( 3rd hs ) square mars, neptune & north node (12th hs sag )

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posted February 19, 2015 12:26 PM            

I have a cardinal T-square that will react with both Pluto/Uranus.

All I have figured so far is that the Pluto transit is the one that is most life-changing. period!!!

Solar Arc Pluto conjunct natal Saturn,I was hospitalized.

Solar Arc Pluto conjunct natal Venus, I developed A huge crush on this girl in high school. I never told her how I felt.

Solar Arc Pluto will conjunct natal Uranus in 2021.I think I may get married here.

Transit Pluto hit natal Venus conjunct-family moved to new neighborhood

Transit Pluto hit natal Uranus conjunct-Mom hospitalized.

Transit Pluto conjunct natal Jupiter- changed degree major to Business Administration.

Transit Pluto conjunct natal Sun/Neptune- First real relationship,family moved to a different state PERMANENTLY and I graduated.

Transit Pluto will hit 3 natal placements over the course of a few coming years;

Transit Pluto-Mercury will conjunct in 2016-This transit may me move or expose me to a completely new environment- I hope.

Transit Pluto will square natal Mars in 2017

Transit Pluto will square natal Moon also in 2017.

posted February 19, 2015 02:02 PM            

what about your natal pluto aspects ?

My natal Pluto aspects;

pluto square ascendant
pluto square sun
pluto square mercury
pluto square venus
pluto sextile mars
pluto trine moon
pluto sextile neptune

I have Jupiter sextiles to asc,sun,merc,venus. Balancing the intense, intimidating energy Pluto causing. Giving light, preventing complete black out.

But, when I had the conjunction transits,Pluto hit me hard because it activated the natal squares. The energy was so dark. As a matter of fact, it sucked the life out of me. Identity crisis, mental crisis.. leaving behind so many things... people, places, jobs...

thank god I've got life long friends, my support system. without them I think I would not be able to make it. - stay alive..

now pluto conjunct venus is day by day getting stronger. And it will activate my Venus square Pluto. and the other hellish aspects all happening more or less at the same time.

I am a strong person... I do have inner strength.. A Saturn + Pluto child. But I feel like I don't have energy left to fight what's coming up... I am already in a depressive cycle and pöff anyway..

Yesterday, I checked my progressions and I was terriefied to see in distant future I will have prog.Pluto will square my natal sun. No. not again..

But don't worry.. I will survive... I always do

posted February 19, 2015 02:09 PM            

what about your natal pluto aspects ?

My natal Pluto aspects;

pluto square ascendant
pluto square sun
pluto square mercury
pluto square venus
pluto sextile mars
pluto trine moon
pluto sextile neptune

I have Jupiter sextiles to asc,sun,merc,venus. Balancing the intense, intimidating energy Pluto causing. Giving light, preventing complete black out.

But, when I had the conjunction transits,Pluto hit me hard because it activated the natal squares. The energy was so dark. As a matter of fact, it sucked the life out of me. Identity crisis, mental crisis.. leaving behind so many things... people, places, jobs...

thank god I've got life long friends, my support system. without them I think I would not be able to make it. - stay alive..

now pluto conjunct venus is day by day getting stronger. And it will activate my Venus square Pluto. and the other hellish aspects all happening more or less at the same time.

I am a strong person... I do have inner strength.. A Saturn + Pluto child. But I feel like I don't have energy left to fight what's coming up... I am already in a depressive cycle and pöff anyway..

Yesterday, I checked my progressions and I was terriefied to see in distant future I will have prog.Pluto will square my natal sun. No. not again..

But don't worry.. I will survive... I always do

posted February 19, 2015 03:51 PM            

I've found that having a "larger story" and seeing what is happening to me from an archetypal perspective has been very, very helpful in my own life. Have you done any reading on mythology? Do you relate to symbols? Do you like stories?

posted February 19, 2015 10:32 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by sis:
thank you peony.

I do a lot of reading and I write. I am addicted to listening to music is like a drug to me, music&dreaming... Nowadays I only watch short films.. You're right.. they can help me.. The last 2 months of 2014, I had the greatest depression of my life. So many things happened all at once and mom. I remember myself hiding under the blanket days & nights and wishing to die...

Did you watch " The Hours" Merly Streep, Julian Moore... Julian Moore gives an explanation about why she did what she did. and the line is " It was death. I choose life "... It just came to my mind one night as a solution and helped me tremendously... wonder which planets and aspects represents this magical line

I am newly interested in mythology. Due to asteroids.. I was thinking of obtaining a book about astreoids-astrology-mythology.. do you know any ?

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Hi, sis, no, I haven't seen "The Hours" but you've got me interested.

I don't know of a book on asteroids. But I'm sure there are people on LL who can suggest something. Why don't you put up a thread in "Asteroids?"

What you were going through those two months is referred to in mythology as a "descent into the Underworld." In astrology, the Underworld is represented by Pluto, what in modern psychological terms is the Unconscious. Descents are equivalent to things like hypnosis or controlled therapeutic regression, depression, a life threatening illness, or even psychosis. There's a book titled "Descent to the Goddess," which is about the Sumerian Goddess Inanna's descent into the Underworld. It's written by a Jungian analyst who uses the myth as a frame of reference for working with women in therapy. It might be difficult reading if you're not familiar with Jungian terms, but it is a powerful book. I discovered it when I was in the Underworld, during a very dark time.

What music are you listening to?

posted February 19, 2015 10:38 PM            

quote:

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Can we really determine how an aspect will effect us ?? That's my question. Is it really possible to act like a shape shifter ??

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posted February 20, 2015 04:19 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by sis:
but you seem to handle them well.

what about your natal pluto aspects ?

My natal Pluto aspects;

pluto square ascendant
pluto square sun
pluto square mercury
pluto square venus
pluto sextile mars
pluto trine moon
pluto sextile neptune

I have Jupiter sextiles to asc,sun,merc,venus. Balancing the intense, intimidating energy Pluto causing. Giving light, preventing complete black out.

But, when I had the conjunction transits,Pluto hit me hard because it activated the natal squares. The energy was so dark. As a matter of fact, it sucked the life out of me. Identity crisis, mental crisis.. leaving behind so many things... people, places, jobs...

thank god I've got life long friends, my support system. without them I think I would not be able to make it. - stay alive..

now pluto conjunct venus is day by day getting stronger. And it will activate my Venus square Pluto. and the other hellish aspects all happening more or less at the same time.

I am a strong person... I do have inner strength.. A Saturn + Pluto child. But I feel like I don't have energy left to fight what's coming up... I am already in a depressive cycle and pöff anyway..

Yesterday, I checked my progressions and I was terriefied to see in distant future I will have prog.Pluto will square my natal sun. No. not again..

But don't worry.. I will survive... I always do

---

I don't think that transits warrant a "fight".

I think that they offer an opportunity to be "other" than whom you know yourself to be.

I have Neptune/Sun conjunct natally and I guess that helps out. Because I look at most things from a spiritual perspective

Someone with Sun/Saturn conjunct natally or Saturn /Asc opposition may find the Neptune transits to Mars/Mercury quite difficult.

These transits will put their reputation into question. People will start to 2nd guess them, undermine them and they will find their confidence and abilities to get things done sorely tested etc!

For someone like this, i would advise them to dissociate with their work-ego.

I know that initially this may seem like suicide in their heads. I would say that Neptune is affording them an opportunity to just head in a differing direction. To know that they are MORE than their "competence" and "work dependability" etc.

For many this advice falls on deaf ears and they struggle,fight and over-compensate with working that much harder.

As a result stress, health and family relationships deteriorate and force them to do what they should have done from the start. Let go and let it be.

Let go. That is what Neptune really wants. Zone out slowly and change course.It is time to get spiritual and re-awaken your inner self.

Pluto wants more introspection. More self-awareness and self -responsibility.And for healing to finally happen

Saturn wants growth and the acceptance of responsibility.Drawing boundaries and advancing/making plans.

posted February 20, 2015 04:47 AM            

Im going through saturn on my IC/Moon / Uranus square asc jupiter , mars, north node. Im about to have uranus oppose pluto ( 2-8 house) and run over mercury sun and chiron. saturn is also gaining steam towards neptune and will oppose progressed sun, where my venus is. - i just survived saturn opposite sun when it went through saturn!

the coast is not clear for me...for YEARS...

I feel depleted of all energy. mental, physical, emotional.

posted February 21, 2015 01:53 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by sis:
I was thinking of obtaining a book about astreoids-astrology-mythology.. do you know any ?

---

A poster "Node" on another thread recommended these two books by Martha Lang-Westcott:

The Orders of Light
Mechanics of the Future-Asteroids

"Published 1993,1988. This is still very new territory, as many Astrologers seem to view 'roids' as bast*** step children. But her books are regarded by most as ground breaking. You can buy used like I did @ Amazon for about 10$ each." - Node

posted February 21, 2015 04:14 AM            

A couple of years ago I had:
trPluto conjunct exactly my natal Sun, Neptune and Mercury
trUranus square my natal Sun, Neptune, Mercury and Uranus
trSaturn sextile my natal Saturn/Uranus conjunction

This quote from peony describes it perfectly:

quote:

---

Originally posted by peony:
Hi sis, when you have planets close together in the natal chart, an outer planet transit can really turn your life upside down, especially now given the Uranus-Pluto square.

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[deleting]

posted February 21, 2015 09:49 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by peony:
Hi, sis, no, I haven't seen "The Hours" but you've got me interested.

I don't know of a book on asteroids. But I'm sure there are people on LL who can suggest something. Why don't you put up a thread in "Asteroids?"

What you were going through those two months is referred to in mythology as a "descent into the Underworld." In astrology, the Underworld is represented by Pluto, what in modern psychological terms is the Unconscious. Descents are equivalent to things like hypnosis or controlled therapeutic regression, depression, a life threatening illness, or even psychosis. There's a book titled "Descent to the Goddess," which is about the Sumerian Goddess Inanna's descent into the Underworld. It's written by a Jungian analyst who uses the myth as a frame of reference for working with women in therapy. It might be difficult reading if you're not familiar with Jungian terms, but it is a powerful book. I discovered it when I was in the Underworld, during a very dark time.

What music are you listening to?

---

thank you so much ! I will obtain the book. and yes, I am very familiar with Jungian terms. As a matter of fact I've been reading Jungs 'Man and his symbols' since the beginning of this year..

I listen indie, progressive / physchedelic rock, post punk, funk, jazz, soul…

posted February 21, 2015 09:56 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by AscTaurus:
I don't think that transits warrant a "fight".

Someone with Sun/Saturn conjunct natally or Saturn /Asc opposition may find the Neptune transits to Mars/Mercury quite difficult.

These transits will put their reputation into question. People will start to 2nd guess them, undermine them and they will find their confidence and abilities to get things done sorely tested etc!

---

I have saturn opposite ascendant nataly and Neptune will square Mars in a couple of months ( and will activate my mars conjunct neptune 12th ). I also have trs. Neptune sextile Mercury so that might help a bit I guess..

posted February 21, 2015 09:59 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by tbelle:
oh boy, I feel ya...

Im going through saturn on my IC/Moon / Uranus square asc jupiter , mars, north node. Im about to have uranus oppose pluto ( 2-8 house) and run over mercury sun and chiron. saturn is also gaining steam towards neptune and will oppose progressed sun, where my venus is. - i just survived saturn opposite sun when it went through saturn!

the coast is not clear for me...for YEARS...

I feel depleted of all energy. mental, physical, emotional.

UGH.

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posted February 21, 2015 10:13 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by sis:
I have saturn opposite ascendant nataly and Neptune will square Mars in a couple of months ( and will activate my mars conjunct neptune 12th ). I also have trs. Neptune sextile Mercury so that might help a bit I guess..

But what's the connection between natal saturn opposite ascendant and transit Neptune aspects ?

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Saturn opposite the Asc natally tends to make one feel that the odds are "agianst" them. They give that "what's the point of trying?" thing.

posted February 21, 2015 11:11 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by sis:
Saturnfan@ I am glad to hear that it all worked well at the end. You have taken the necessary steps to heal yourself… For some reason, I can't It feels like I am going around in circles. I am 40 years old.. and it feels like the options I have are not unlimited anymore.. But yeah, everything will pass and I will be able to recenter myself hopefully..

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