posted August 09, 2015 10:59 PM            

I mean, do you just take on their feelings about you, internalizing their arguments and complaints rather deeply?

I find it hard to be around people who don't like me. It makes me not like myself either, and I forget that I don't have to be whatever they want, or just hide the parts they don't like, to protect myself from their scrutiny. (Which I take too seriously.)

I need to fix this.

Wondering if other Pisces moons have this problem.

posted August 09, 2015 11:21 PM            

Not to say it is the same as having a Pisces Moon.. But.. Neptune is pretty heavily aspected in my chart.

I definitely become this way sometimes.. I even had this problem in school, when I felt that a teacher didn't think I was very intelligent (not to say I am..) it seems I would literally end up not being able to express myself around them.. I would always end up saying or doing things that I believed didn't represent my actual thoughts.. Kind of actually making me look stupid. It becomes a vicious cycle.. It's like.. 'She thinks I'm unintelligent, so, I express myself incorrectly, doubting myself, which really does make it look like I don't understand, which only proves her right.. And because of this, I have an even harder time expressing myself because I'm battling those thoughts, which also makes it harder for me to express myself.'

Honestly.. If I know someone doesn't like me, it isn't even really purposeful that I catch onto those vibes.. And I even feel as if though they are my own at times.. (not sure if that makes sense..)

Same with other's emotions. Sometimes I feel I pick up on them without realizing it. Which is difficult as it is.. But, I also have emotional problems. Most the time I am not really aware on what I am feeling.. Or am unable to understand what I am feeling unless it is a very intense emotion..

(however, that goes to say, I am a rather emotional person.. I'm the kind of person who is paradoxically on the edge of crying all the time, yet am never able to cry.. Kind of like that sneeze you just can't get out.)

It's like.. Sometimes, it seems I even begin to embody the thoughts of those around me. It's kind of hard to explain.

I guess the only advice I could personally give, would be.. Try not to take things too personally.... However, we know that advice really isn't advice. It's not really something that can just be done in the blink of an eye.

posted August 09, 2015 11:40 PM            

Wow I relate to all of that. LOL about the sneeze...

I've honestly wondered if the Pisces moon (and maybe moon-Neptune) is like an energetic blank space that has to be filled with other people's energy...that it has no real substance of its own. Sometimes it has seemed that way to me.

But lately I've been trying harder to love myself and see what that actually feels like. Then compare it to how others feel about me. And I see that they don't love or like me...probably because they don't understand me...and that's partly because something about them shuts me down.

And the shut down part is the part that would have explained myself to them. But it's just that I give up hope pretty fast. Especially if people have a lot of preconceived notions about how a person *should* be, and are narrow-minded.

It's like I'm halfway-thinking that there is no point explaining anything to them, it would just fall on deaf ears. So I don't even fully think about it. And that lack of thinking and analysis seems to freeze up my emotions.

posted August 09, 2015 11:59 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
Do you find it hard to like yourself, if the person you are with doesn't like you?

I mean, do you just take on their feelings about you, internalizing their arguments and complaints rather deeply?

I find it hard to be around people who don't like me. It makes me not like myself either, and I forget that I don't have to be whatever they want, or just hide the parts they don't like, to protect myself from their scrutiny. (Which I take too seriously.)

I need to fix this.

Wondering if other Pisces moons have this problem.

Thanks for any input.

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posted August 10, 2015 12:04 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Gabby:
I'm not a pisces moon, but virgo moon in 12th and I have a Sun/Merc/Neptune stellium. I relate so much to what you've said.
In the past I seem to unconsciously adopt and become what others felt about me. It's something I've had to overcome but it's still a struggle. The only way to prevent it is to dismiss myself from those ppls company who think poorly of me. I can't help but be uncomfortable and feel ppls judgments which inevitably become insecurities that I act out if I hang around them to much. If I loudly stand up for myself and tell them they are wrong and then put up a very thick wall i can overcome it for a peroid of time, but it's only temporary.

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posted August 10, 2015 12:08 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
And I see that they don't love or like me...probably because they don't understand me...and that's partly because something about them shuts me down.

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posted August 10, 2015 12:16 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Gabby:
The only way to prevent it is to dismiss myself from those ppls company who think poorly of me. I can't help but be uncomfortable and feel ppls judgments which inevitably become insecurities that I act out if I hang around them to much.

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I feel like I need to reckon with this and stop kidding myself that things will get better on their own. Or that I can get by on my charms...yeah I can diffuse people or hide in various ways, but that doesn't supply anything positive.

quote:

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Originally posted by Gabby:
If I loudly stand up for myself and tell them they are wrong and then put up a very thick wall i can overcome it for a peroid of time, but it's only temporary.

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posted August 10, 2015 12:20 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by aquaguy91:

I have sun in the 12th conjunct saturn. I feel like my family doubts me because I'm the baby of the family and it really undermines my confidence. I have tried explaining this to them but they won't listen. That's why I plan to go overseas for awhile. I want to unplug myself from that and be my own person.

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I can relate (as the youngest of six kids.)

posted August 10, 2015 12:25 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by ReadingTheStars95:
Yeah.. It's kind of frustrating. It's almost like we need people to be open to our energy on a more subtle level in order for us to truly connect with them, and express ourselves for who we are. I think that is partly because, that part of ourselves we want to express isn't something that can be simply expressed with words (not to say this in an ego-driven way.) there is more of ourselves that we can only really express through energetic exchange, almost. The thing is, it seems there isn't enough people open enough to be able to speak with us on those levels.. That non-verbal, energetic communication. It's kinda hard to explain, but I think you may understand where I am coming from.

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posted August 10, 2015 12:26 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by aquaguy91:
When I signed up to take classes this year the first thing my family asked was "You arent going to quit if you get frustrated are you?" Gee thanks for the vote of confidence! It means alot

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Oh god I have BEEN THERE.

Really. I empathize.

ETA: My husband is much older and that brings in similar issues. Yeah he saves me from my own stupidity sometimes, but what if I like and need my own stupidity?

posted August 10, 2015 12:41 AM            

Actually my dad was always very supportive until I graduated college, then suddenly he and my sister (who very annoyingly played the role of "mom") were antagonistic like that. At least in that phase of my life.

Which made me want to be homeless.

Which is part of the reason I wanted that apartment that I mentioned in Sweet Peas...I needed an escape from their environment.

posted August 10, 2015 12:57 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by aquaguy91:
Screw you 12th house sun/saturn conjunction.

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LOL

Hmm, I have 12H Saturn in mutual reception with my sun.

Never thought of it that way before...that people cannot see how responsible you are. Saturn gets obscured in the 12H. And for sun-Saturn people that means WE get obscured.

posted August 10, 2015 01:54 AM            

Pisces Mars, square Moon/Venus. Ruler of my Sun.

posted August 10, 2015 02:02 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
Same here. Only temporary

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Oh, you edited. so I won't put it back in. But I could relate to the paragraph that's now gone. I've found that things tend to get better down the line, with most people, when I think that it's never going to change. It doesn't mean that I've completely given up, and stop saying anything altogether, but it stops feeling like something that much happen *now*. I still occasionally have to step back, if I realize that some sort of hope is still there. Like, "oops, too soon to talk."

I like you.

Oh, it isn't gone. I wonder why it didn't quote.
With my sister, I kept expecting things to get better, because she was my sister. Because she knew me, and I knew her (I thought). Being around that judgement every single day, can be brutal. I would sometimes be fine, until she got that snooty look on her face, and spoke to everyone in the room except me - or snarked at me in a prissy manner, if she did say anything. She'd make sure to discuss wedding plans in front of me -for a wedding I was uninvited from attending, or acting stiff and shooting dirty looks, or slamming things around, if I dared to enter the same kitchen as her.

posted August 10, 2015 03:28 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Faith:
Do you find it hard to like yourself, if the person you are with doesn't like you?

I mean, do you just take on their feelings about you, internalizing their arguments and complaints rather deeply?

I find it hard to be around people who don't like me. It makes me not like myself either, and I forget that I don't have to be whatever they want, or just hide the parts they don't like, to protect myself from their scrutiny. (Which I take too seriously.)

I need to fix this.

Wondering if other Pisces moons have this problem.

Thanks for any input.

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Oh yes! This is on the spot!

Actually I think this is also what makes a pisces moon so flexible in their social relations. I mean, we can morph into any "likable" person, or what we think would be likable for the others we are with. We kind of change personality a little bit for every person we know... for better and for worse, cause we can end up losing our selves completely. It's no wonder when you think about it... it's really exhausting to try to be likable all the time.

But don't you know this feeling too then: When you are together with a person (not even a friend, just another person) and you find them somewhat interesting or they have a trait that you like, then you "take on" that trait and operate it into your own personality. For an example if you know a person who laughs in a certain way, you suddenly take on a bit of the same laugh like it is now a part of you.... I think this is what makes pisces so confusing because they always change personality and maybe doesn't even know what their own personality is.

posted August 10, 2015 02:10 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by polkadotstars:
I'm a Pisces Moon. I hate to sound conceited, if this does come across this way.. however, I don't meet many people who dislike me. But in the rare case someone is rude to me I don't really care. I brush it off easily and I just think to myself that it is their issue. I'm not one to surround myself with negativity.

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Most people like my personality but some have hang-ups about politics or religion, and I offend them by not taking their side, and that can get uncomfortable.

Then my family members have their expectations of me as well.

I learned that a while ago..."nice" isn't good enough for some people. They will just push past it and tell you about what you're doing that's not up to their standards. And sometimes they are lodged into your life and you can't help dealing with them and their vibes...ugh....

posted August 10, 2015 02:37 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by next to neptune:
Actually I think this is also what makes a pisces moon so flexible in their social relations. I mean, we can morph into any "likable" person, or what we think would be likable for the others we are with. We kind of change personality a little bit for every person we know... for better and for worse, cause we can end up losing our selves completely. It's no wonder when you think about it... it's really exhausting to try to be likable all the time.

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Yeah it can be a thankless job! But it's not even my main intention, to be likable...it's not like popularity is the prize I have my eye on. I am just motivated to make everyone comfortable.

quote:

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Originally posted by next to neptune:
But don't you know this feeling too then: When you are together with a person (not even a friend, just another person) and you find them somewhat interesting or they have a trait that you like, then you "take on" that trait and operate it into your own personality.

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Yes.

Well additionally, I have a splash chart and a varied personality (to put it charitably! hehehe) so if I "echo" a person, I consider that an authentic expression of myself, because I can pull from whatever planet of mine is getting pinged by them. In other words, if I'm talking to a Scorpio, I call upon my Scorpio; if it's Aries, well I can do Aries.

quote:

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Originally posted by next to neptune:
For an example if you know a person who laughs in a certain way, you suddenly take on a bit of the same laugh like it is now a part of you.... I think this is what makes pisces so confusing because they always change personality and maybe doesn't even know what their own personality is.

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My college boyfriend always complained about this...I think he was jealous that some people made me happier than he did.

As I've gotten older I see my own self and my patterns more clearly and know that I don't shapeshift that drastically...

But it's enough of a problem that I won't get a Facebook, because I'm aware that some of my friends have a different impression of me than other friends, and it would be confusing if everyone met up in one place and talked to me as if I am like twenty different people.

Maybe not that drastic...or it'd maybe MORE drastic...I don't really know. But mostly, I'm just trying to skirt around others' prejudices and maintain my private sense of peace. I have an 8H moon...'not designed for the public eye, anyway.

posted August 10, 2015 02:52 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by teasel:
I'm not a Pisces Moon, but I do, unless I'm having one of those rare days when I'm feeling unflappable, or just plain know that they are wrong about something. It hurts with one person, but when more pile on, that's when it grows into the feeling that there must be something wrong with me, otherwise they wouldn't join in.

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I feel that way about society ~ like I am just an alien who doesn't fit in here ~ so obviously *I* am in the wrong. But that's just a chronic dull ache, not like the acute pain of facing a crowd of accusers.

Well when my sister lied about something major and I called her out on it, my siblings mostly turned against me. That really cost me a lot of pain until they finally realized I had been right.

quote:

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Originally posted by teasel:
My sister was extremely social phobic. I think that's partly why she latched onto her husband so much: he was safe in ways, even though he's a giant douche in others.

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She has the same sun and moon as me, right?

I wonder how she and I compare on the social phobia scale. I'm fine for parties, but when I had school or work every day, I was always on edge and basically miserable.

quote:

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Originally posted by teasel:
I still occasionally have to step back, if I realize that some sort of hope is still there. Like, "oops, too soon to talk."

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Well said, I think I know exactly what you mean. Generally speaking, I don't like to actively deconstruct people's assumptions and often will just let those assumptions die off on their own...meanwhile I am hoping that once that process is over, we can start moving upwards.

quote:

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Originally posted by teasel:
I like you.

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Thanks and ditto, of course!

quote:

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Originally posted by teasel:
I would sometimes be fine, until she got that snooty look on her face, and spoke to everyone in the room except me - or snarked at me in a prissy manner, if she did say anything. She'd make sure to discuss wedding plans in front of me -for a wedding I was uninvited from attending, or acting stiff and shooting dirty looks, or slamming things around, if I dared to enter the same kitchen as her.

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LOL at the word prissy. Is her sign tightly square yours? I've only known *prissy* third decan Caps...though two of my closest friends are non-prissy third decan Caps.

Anyway, that violent energy she is throwing off...I know you didn't mean to make me reflect on my own crimes against humanity but I can be a total b*tch...and honestly it's humbling to think that if people don't like me, and it hurts, maybe it's just good old fashioned karma! What goes around comes around.

That being said, the bigger issue is, I'm sorry you have to deal with it. That sounds horrendous.

quote:

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Originally posted by teasel:
Mum snapped at me yesterday, and the rest of my afternoon was ruined. I can spiral quickly now, if something catches me off guard, or if certain people hurt me.

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Same. *hug*