posted August 18, 2015 12:43 AM            

"Marry first for love. If that dont work out, marry again for money."

I plan to take this advice seriously. I married for love...we'll see what the future holds

Sidenote: my north node is in 2nd house taurus. I have bad luck when i try to lean on anyone but myself for money. So my plan A needs to work.

posted August 18, 2015 12:59 AM            

A financially stable man is attractive yes, but I would feel insecure if I'm not financially stable myself, for me its a major turn on if both partners are successful and aggressively ambitious. Even more so if they help EACH OTHER multiply what they have, helping each other perfect whatever it is they are trying to do to increase their monetary worth, career, business etc. To be able to discipline one another in that regard, better one another and not hold each other back, I think that's LOVE.

Side note, for me it makes me extremely uncomfortable to have a man provide for everything or for it to be unequal the thought alone makes me cringe.

posted August 18, 2015 01:18 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Odette:
I don't think healthy relationships are based on "need" anyway - since that only leads to further codependence.

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It's just tricky when there are children involved. Then it becomes, "Our son needs this..." and you have to jointly agree on what to do. You need to agree.

Also, obviously, it still happens that many families work it out so that the woman stays home with the children while the husband works. Nothing that the woman does at home is considered "work," because work without pay is literally worthless. In a capitalist society, it's actually a huge personal sacrifice for a woman to stay at home with her children and devote her time to them, thus renouncing her ability to redeem her existence via career....but some of us STILL tend to do it for the basic reason that we want to be with our children. Which some people say, is not really a feminine instinct, but unfortunate cultural programming. And some people say young children benefit more from daycare than being with their families, anyway.

posted August 18, 2015 03:13 AM            

It's even supported by Maslow's pyramid of needs:
Security=friend/comrade (super important, down there with food and shelter)
Love, built right on top of the basics (food, shelter, security) therefore less vital and more of the spirit

posted August 18, 2015 06:54 AM            

In all of my relationships I haven't looked at money as a decision-making factor, but I would be lying if I said it didn't matter at all. I find success sexy! And knowing that my partner will be able to provide for us is comforting and reassuring.

I cannot imagine entering a relationship knowing that I not only have to provide for myself, but him as well. I have no problem contributing or taking care of my own bills, but the thought of everything depending on me alone, that scares me a bit.

I don't think it's wrong at all to consider a man's income any more than I am hink it wrong to consider how f you are sexually attracted.

posted August 18, 2015 11:08 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by PixieJane:
Just going off the top of my head...sheesh, I was going to just list a couple (Scorpio sun with Cappie moon is one I read of that is probably scheming to marry into wealth as soon as they think of such things) but suddenly several are popping up in my mind. Different signs have different reasons for placing an importance on money and the planets and houses also matter. And also on what kind of income. Taurus prefers sure and steady to a lot more where it's easy come, easy go, for example while Aries and Sag might prefer the latter.

I haven't cared. I don't let myself be taken advantage of but if a guy/girl pulls his/her weight (doesn't have to be money, though I'm pretty good about putting "monetary value" on intangibles like making me laugh, something many people will pay a lot of money for, for example) then I'm okay with it, but I think I'm unusual that way.

Psychologically I wasn't raised on romance novels where a woman is typically taken by someone rich (or becomes rich), even if it's a pirate or brutish landlord or some such (but she brings out the sweetness in him, ha!) and instead was raised on media where women/females typically took care of themselves and I'm sure that has had a huge affect. Even so I heard many girls (and both women and men, mothers and fathers, to girls) say things like, "It's just as easy to fall in love with someone rich as someone poor." Astrologically speaking my Mars-Uranus in Sag pretty much let me shrug that off, and perhaps my Libra stellium also caused me to question it and balance it with another view.

My 5H Sag stellium also prefers freedom and so is careful of anyone having power over me, including money. Though really I think had I been straight and raised on romance media I'd probably want a guy who give me plenty of room to roam while funding my trips around the world (including by myself). OTOH, Sag passion can throw away practical considerations sometimes and Libra wouldn't want to be unfair.

As for you, I do think progressions are what you should look into as for you this is a change. Of course if you attract guys who take advantage of you (some guys really will use women for money and essentially want her to become his mother plus sex) then you could just be sick of it.

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Awesome comment, very informative!

As for me....it's quite likely it's just I've had my fill of bullshi+ters taking advantage of me and using me.
I'm starting to realize I'm not fully following my scorp NN in 2nd....which is all about learning to trust and moving away from the stubborn independence of not letting anyone help me and taking on all the responsibilty alone of taking care of everything n everyone.(taurus SN in 8th)

I have a new lesson to learn, how to take care of myself through letting others help me. This is a hard thing for me to learn!
Relying on others to be there? Trust that they see my worth, my value and want to be there for me? Trust they will give me ways to support MY life in exchange for those values?? Whoa!! That's hard for me!! Lol

I don't want to rely on others I want to do it all myself because I know I can rely on myself. But that attitude has gotten me nowhere and now I'm realizing the reason it's gotten me nowhere is because that attitude is not following my NN path....

posted August 18, 2015 11:11 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by bananaz:
Alright. Gonna be completely honest here. I go by the sage advice my momma gave me:

"Marry first for love. If that dont work out, marry again for money."

I plan to take this advice seriously. I married for love...we'll see what the future holds

Sidenote: my north node is in 2nd house taurus. I have bad luck when i try to lean on anyone but myself for money. So my plan A needs to work.

Aries rising
Pisces sun
Leo moon

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It's so funny you just commented this, if you read my last post....I have Scorp NN in 2nd!!

posted August 18, 2015 11:14 AM            

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Originally posted by Gabby:
It's do funny you just commented this, if you read my last post....I have Scorp NN in 2nd!!

I have bad luck when I try to rely on myself! That's all I've ever done stubbornly refused help but now I'm realizing it have to change!

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Same placement.

Reading in depth about it it says to learn to let go of being stubbornly self-reliant. Learn to accept help and trust others to do their part to fulfill your financial goals.

posted August 18, 2015 11:18 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by DopGang:
Same placement.

Reading in depth about it it says to learn to let go of being stubbornly self-reliant. Learn to accept help and trust others to do their part to fulfill your financial goals.

You'll gain more than by trying to do it all yourself but you need to let go and trust others that they'll get done what needs done. Even if you don't agree with how they go about doing it.
Interestingly, my Uranus is conjunct.

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posted August 18, 2015 11:27 AM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Gabby:
Do you do this Dop?? Isn't it sooooo hard to trust othes to be there for you?

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posted August 18, 2015 12:00 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by DopGang:
It really is tough!
I could go on and on.
We both have Virgo which I think relates.
Pluto/asc which I think relates to it. (Death/rebirth, control, obsession via the house of self - only you can take care of you - you come first, etc. )
My father even reinforced this behavior when I was a kid. He really taught us to work hard and get all that we need by those means.
Cap IC.
It's crazy when you really start looking at all the connections!

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posted August 18, 2015 12:04 PM            

My sister (Taurus Sun)always talks about having to choose between the two. As if they are mutually exclusive.

posted August 18, 2015 01:24 PM            

I wouldn't say love and money go hand in hand - to feel and experience real love is what life is all about - but that's not to neglect the reality of life and that is...life costs money. I definitely look for a stable and solid provider as part of my criteria for a man - someone with a good head on their shoulders and a mutual desire for good life. I am definitely not the type to get swept up in a fairytale and run off with the starving artist or the bass player in a band. Much too practical for that.

To each their own but I agree that while as a female having the necessary resources to survive on your own is important, a partnership is just that - a partnership and women often bear the weight of familial responsibility so it is only fair the male should compensate in other ways (assuming standard gender roles). I've known many a relationship to suffer because the wife has felt burdened by the responsibility of primary bread winner and caregiver while her "lazy" husband works a menial job and doesn't lift a finger.

posted August 18, 2015 04:01 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Gabby:
I've always not cared about money when in love, I thought the 2 had nothing to do with each other....but lately I'm thinking I'm going to go for money instead of love. Not sure why but my thoughts regarding these 2 are coming together.

What in natal makes someone love money in love and others feel they are completely seperate?

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posted August 18, 2015 04:36 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Gabby:
It's so funny you just commented this, if you read my last post....I have Scorp NN in 2nd!!

I have bad luck when I try to rely on myself! That's all I've ever done, is stubbornly refused help from anyone! I wanted to do it all by myself and take care of everyone else to, but now I'm realizing it have to change!

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It comes so natural to you to be independent, and for me to be co-dependent. I have no problem leaning on my partner and losing myself in a relationship. This is likely what happened in a past life? Maybe? And possibly you were fiercely independent in your last life?

It's hard to say which is harder to deal with, probably both equally.

You need to learn to trust others and make joint decisions. I need to learn to trust myself and take initiative.

posted August 18, 2015 04:38 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by ail221:

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posted August 18, 2015 06:32 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by Astrochologist:
Not sure exactly what you mean. But I think Venus - Saturn, Venus Capricorn, Venus Taurus. Venus here wants tangible wealth and the lofty ideals of love, the pangeantry don't concern them nearly as much as say Venus in Pisces. Venus in Libra even though this is a very "Venus" placement and idealistic not realistic, when aspecting Saturn it has produced some of the wealthiest people on earth. Take Cowboys owner Jerry Jones, and investor Jim Rogers for example.

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My progressed Venus saggy@5, aspecting my Saturn leo@3....but Venus is moving away from Saturn.
My natal Venus is in libra...

posted August 18, 2015 07:38 PM            

quote:

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Originally posted by bananaz:
It comes so natural to you to be independent, and for me to be co-dependent. I have no problem leaning on my partner and losing myself in a relationship. This is likely what happened in a past life? Maybe? And possibly you were fiercely independent in your last life?

It's hard to say which is harder to deal with, probably both equally.

You need to learn to trust others and make joint decisions. I need to learn to trust myself and take initiative.

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