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Author Topic:   Water Moon "How are you?"
Odette
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posted September 10, 2015 02:26 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Odette     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
When friends (not acquaintances) ask you how you've been, or what's been happening... do you usually give sad or negative answers? Is this something you do often?

What I mean is... I try to give a balanced answer and mention a mixed bag of things (the good, the bad or the in-between) - when I'm talking to a real friend...
With someone I don't know well, it would be more like "Fine.. Thanks...Bye".

It's difficult for me to interpret what's behind a completely negative answer.

e.g.

- How are you?

Water M: I'm not ok AT ALL. Life is horrible, and I feel absolutely awful... and I don't want to talk about it.

^ And that was the answer last week, a month ago, a year ago etc.. It's always a negative answer...
This person has an awesome family - very supportive of them, they are financially pretty well off.. They are young and physically healthy.. amongst other positive things.

Is this the truth of how they see their lives? Is it depression? Is it an attempt to seek more attention from myself or others?
Can they really not find a silver lining?

Would you say - you associate this with a Water Moon placement, or not?

Personally, I feel better when I'm grateful for the things I have in my life. The people I know who respond this way, seem ungrateful - but it could well be due to mental issues preventing them from ever experiencing a sense of gratitude.

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Dreaminess
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posted September 10, 2015 04:08 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Dreaminess     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
"Fine.. Thanks...Bye"

I always answer like that no matter if its a close one or not, I am just very private with my feelings. Even when i cry alone i have to turn off the lights cause i feel more hidden and comfortable. Water moons esp if its a pisces moon are very sensitive and can take in way more than they should so its hard to be happy or in a good mood all the time even if their lives are good. Check if this person have a hard saturn aspect cause hard aspected saturnians can be very negative with themselves, others and just life and can drain you with their negativity.

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bansheequeen
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posted September 10, 2015 04:09 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for bansheequeen     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Nope. Not at all. I would associate the attention fishing "Im sad ask me about it" stuff more with a water sun or asc or 1st house moon.... or just someone that "wears" their water more on the surface rather than deep down.

I vaguely know someone like that and shes a leo-virgo. I know a pisces (dont know moon) that always posts those kinds of "Im miserable, please ask me whats making me so miserable" types of posts on facebook "UGH bad day... I don want to talk about it... I feel like trash" etc.

Pretty much all the water moons I know, including myself, dont really like to let our emotions out that superficially if its something that really bothers us. Water moon isnt really an attention seeking placement. We want real validation for our emotions, but not fake casually social validation. I do think that water moons generally are more pessimistic because we just feel things very immedately its hard to look outside that box. Except for a pisces moon family member I have shes always happy and pleased with life, even when things go wrong she always looks to the bright side, when she does get depressed she doesnt really fish for attention like that.

Also what is saturn doing in these peoples charts. The two most pessimistic downers I know are aquas. One has a scorpio moon and lots of cap in his chart if I remember correctly i think like almost all his other planets were in cap.... The other aqua i dont really know her placements but aqua is a saturnian sign itself...

I also feel like low fire might make someone a downer.

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bansheequeen
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posted September 10, 2015 04:11 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for bansheequeen     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Dreaminess:
"Fine.. Thanks...Bye"

I always answer like that no matter if its a close one or not, I am just very private with my feelings. Even when i cry alone i have to turn off the lights cause i feel more hidden and comfortable. Water moons esp if its a pisces moon are very sensitive and can take in way more than they should so its hard to be happy or in a good mood all the time even if their lives are good. Check if this person have a hard saturn aspect cause hard aspected saturnians can be very negative with themselves, others and just life and can drain you with their negativity.


I agree... I feel a lot more comfortable letting my emotions out alone. I am a cancer moon so I lock up my emotions in my shell. I can see this for Scorpio moon to being another hard shelled critter. Its hard to see a scorpio moon cry.

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jupitersgirl
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posted September 10, 2015 05:12 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for jupitersgirl     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I'm a pisces moon and I don't give negative answers like that, I'm quite optimistic in general. However I have seen quite a number of cancer moons answering negatively. It may be cancer moodiness.
Scorpio moons tend to give realistic answers about how they feel.

EDIT: These are all people I'm close to. If we weren't close they would just say "fine". lol

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Dreaminess
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posted September 10, 2015 06:01 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Dreaminess     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by bansheequeen:
I agree... I feel a lot more comfortable letting my emotions out alone. I am a cancer moon so I lock up my emotions in my shell. I can see this for Scorpio moon to being another hard shelled critter. Its hard to see a scorpio moon cry.

I also lock up my emotions until i am alone. I also agree with you that water moons don`t let their emotions out that superficially if its something that really bothers us. Even on rare occasions when i haven`t managed to hold it in i still don`t tell what`s really up and will just say something like "No its nothing" etc etc and i will try to brush it off and swing the attention onto something else. People that know me find me very secretive with my feelings.

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Soltze
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posted September 10, 2015 06:06 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Soltze     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by bansheequeen:
I agree... I feel a lot more comfortable letting my emotions out alone. I am a cancer moon so I lock up my emotions in my shell. I can see this for Scorpio moon to being another hard shelled critter. Its hard to see a scorpio moon cry.

Yes. I have a scorpio moon and I'm more like the silent bad humour type. No one seems me crying, never.
I always answer I'm ok, so no negative answers. I might give off the clue in how I actually say it though
With time I've learned to ask for my personal space so as to not explode out of nothing.
If I'm not okay I won't inflict my presence on anyone. I'll spend a whole week just doing my rotine, and do my crying alone and spending time with myself so as to process my emotions. So when I'm feeling better I can be a good company for everyone.

I agree that the attention seeking "poor me" has to do with other placements.

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Odette
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posted September 10, 2015 06:15 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Odette     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hmmmm.... What about romantic partners then?
Do you tend to be depressed/negative around a romantic partner? Do you show them this side?

Thank you for all your replies! I really appreciate it
The person in question does actually have two major Saturn aspects, so that's a good point... It could be partially a Saturnian thing.

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Aries23Degrees
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posted September 10, 2015 09:52 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Aries23Degrees     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Life goes on , just the same.

That is what I always say

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Selenite
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posted September 10, 2015 10:24 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Selenite     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
No, but if I don't, I find that they probe until I do find something 'negative,' as if they don't believe me when I say 'good!'

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Selenite
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posted September 10, 2015 10:25 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Selenite     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by bansheequeen:
"Im sad ask me about it"

Lol, I want this on a shirt.

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margym0o
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posted September 10, 2015 02:15 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for margym0o     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Scorpio Moon here and I definitely keep my emotions to myself around most people. It's not until I really get to know you and trust you (or you're close family) that I let you peak in. Even my closest friends or parents don't know how I'm really feeling about something when I think it's TOO revealing because I don't want to seem weak. The only person who can really get to me or sees it is my significant other. I think this speaks of some other attention-seeking natal aspects because that's really how I see it. Answering "How are you" with anything other than "Good thanks" or "Fine thanks" is just an invitation for someone to probe you and I'm far too private for that. I'd rather pretend everything is fine than to have to answer to someone. It's honestly one of my pet-peeves because I feel like anyone who burdens a near stranger with their problems is just trying to glean sympathy.

In my opinion I see water moons as being more private because they need the head space to deal with their sometimes overwhelming emotions (which is why Cancers have a reputation for retreating into their "shell" and getting snappy when threatened).

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meyray
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posted September 10, 2015 05:00 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for meyray     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I'm irritated by this question. To me this is a completely empty phrase. Just polite socially normative noise that comes out after saying "Hey".

"Hey, how are you?"
"Fine. You?"
"Me too"

...and move on with the conversation. I don't believe for a second that someone who asks "Hey, how are you?" when we greet actually cares or wants to hear about my day or feelings. If I were to give an honest answer it would makes things horribly awkward and uncomfortable.

I would give a substantial answer if they ask me during a conversation or make a point about it "How are you? You seem [adjective]--" because that's when I'll know they are actually asking and making a conversation about it. And I would do the same vice versa.

Even in the second scenario I'm a little reserved about sharing. I never lie if I'm feeling bad but I try not to overshare or cry on their shoulder. I say how I feel and give reason for it in a sentence or two.

Scorpio Moon

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Soltze
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posted September 10, 2015 05:47 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Soltze     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Odette:
Hmmmm.... What about romantic partners then?
Do you tend to be depressed/negative around a romantic partner? Do you show them this side?

Thank you for all your replies! I really appreciate it
The person in question does actually have two major Saturn aspects, so that's a good point... It could be partially a Saturnian thing.


No, not depressed. If I'm feeling negative about the relationship I'll keep quiet until I feel I'm ready to talk about it.
I've learned from past relationship faillure to keep my negative/sad side hidden. I'll vanish to calm myself.
That's why I don't see myself living in the same house as my partner. I need my freedom of movement.

I have some saturn problems. But you learn to deal with it....or not as the case you refer :-D

@Meeray: I agree 100%. People ask it out of formality and it annoys me. If they don't wan't the truth, why bother asking?

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Odette
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posted September 10, 2015 06:32 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Odette     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Yes it's polite and empty coming from acquaintances... "How are you? How was your weekend" type BS...
I'm talking about close friends, as I was saying in my OP.

quote:
I would give a substantial answer if they ask me during a conversation or make a point about it "How are you? You seem [adjective]--"

That's what I'm referring to ^

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Odette
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posted September 10, 2015 06:36 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Odette     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
And I do want the truth....

What I was wondering is... why is their truth perpetually dark? And where is the gratitude at?
Because there are positive things they do have. They are not a starving third-world child with no access to clean water.

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PixieJane
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posted September 10, 2015 07:32 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for PixieJane     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote

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PixieJane
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posted September 10, 2015 07:47 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for PixieJane     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
The water moons I'm close to aren't like that, but then if they were they'd probably find me frustrating to deal with.

Though this is just an impression on my part (I haven't actually made hard notes on this though I thought about doing so before) it does seem that many people on the net who get on for a constant exchange of virtual hugs in various forms (and frequently going on how rough life is on them online and off) are overwhelmingly water moon.

It could be a cultural thing, too. In rural East Texas (where I know plenty of water moons) it's considered demeaning to ask for or give sympathy unless one is really close. I can think of one Scorpio moon down there who was really negative but only with people she was close to (and she was also more vengeful than seeking sympathy). In contrast, where Oprah is seen as an excellent ideal then I could see water moons (and other moons beside) seeking those hugs and words of comfort because it's like some solidarity thing and how to prove to each other how compassionate you are (and thus deserve compassion) rather than how it would come off in some other areas where different attitudes prevail (and asking/giving sympathy to strangers would be like asking a stranger to tie your shoes for you, or a stranger to just pat you on the head, or going on line to brag about or congratulate others over tying one's own shoes).

Oh! One thing I've noticed about Pisces moons and something two of them have agreed with me on (to a lesser extent this is also true of Pisces suns): they absorb and emit what they're around, so if they're around a bunch of suffering people (even if those suffering people try to cover it up), or angry or what have you, then that is what they'll project, perhaps more openly than those they absorbed it from. They do the same with positive emotions. Therefore they have to choose what "waters" they "swim" in as they'll morph to match it.

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peony
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posted September 10, 2015 08:07 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for peony     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Odette:
When friends (not acquaintances) ask you how you've been, or what's been happening... do you usually give sad or negative answers? Is this something you do often?

No. I have a water Moon and a preponderance of planets in water. I don't deny negative feelings but I'm training myself to take responsibility for my feelings and to talk about them in those terms. I like to find and share insights and something inspirational with other people. I find great joy in that.

quote:
e.g.

- How are you?

Water M: I'm not ok AT ALL. Life is horrible, and I feel absolutely awful... and I don't want to talk about it.

^ And that was the answer last week, a month ago, a year ago etc.. It's always a negative answer...


I don't think the scenario you're describing is just water Moon in and of itself, but Moon in major aspect to Saturn and/or Pluto, or Saturn-Pluto in hard aspect. Hard aspects of Saturn and also Neptune can manifest as being a victim who has minimal self-awareness and who see everyone and everything but themselves as the source of their problems.

quote:
Is this the truth of how they see their lives? Is it depression? Is it an attempt to seek more attention from myself or others? Can they really not find a silver lining?

Unfortunately, there are people who are addicted to negativity. I'd like to help, but I know I can't, except to work on myself.

Wei Wu Wei was not Chinese but an Irish poet actually who asks the question: 'Why are you unhappy?" and he graciously provides an answer: he says it's because 99.9 percent of everything we think, and of everything we do, is for ourselves—and there isn't one.


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aquaguy91
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posted September 10, 2015 09:16 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for aquaguy91     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hey Odette,
Sorry to derail your thread but one of my friends just came out and said he is demisexual. I thought you might be interested in knowing that since you talk about it alot.

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Insilver
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posted September 10, 2015 11:41 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Insilver     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Odette:
And I do want the truth....

What I was wondering is... why is their truth perpetually dark? And where is the gratitude at?
Because there are positive things they [b]do
have. They are not a starving third-world child with no access to clean water.[/B]


I can't speak for those who aren't me, but perhaps the ridiculous amounts of insensitivity, criticism and negativity they are in constant contact with have something to do with it.

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StubbornVirgo
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posted September 11, 2015 01:27 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for StubbornVirgo     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Odette:
With someone I don't know well, it would be more like "Fine.. Thanks...Bye".

This is me, to a T.

I'm a really private person. I'm prone to being this way with basically everyone but people who know me really well, such as my best friend or parent. I probably come off as really negative to them, but they both have water-heavy charts, so they handle it pretty well.

I don't associate the negativity with mental illness, though. I am prone to depression at times, but I like to blame that on my Saturn in 12th. I think water moons and moons in water houses are just more sensitive, over all. We pick up on a lot of stuff on an emotional level that other moons don't and it can get overwhelming at times. I am grateful for the good stuff in my life, but sometimes focusing on that just isn't enough to bring me out of my funk. That's where being around other watery people helps. And sometimes, I just have to be alone and figure it out.

I have Gemini Moon in my 4th house, conjunct my IC.

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StubbornVirgo
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posted September 11, 2015 01:35 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for StubbornVirgo     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by PixieJane:

Yes!!

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StubbornVirgo
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posted September 11, 2015 01:44 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for StubbornVirgo     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Double post - whoops!

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bansheequeen
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posted September 11, 2015 04:41 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for bansheequeen     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by jupitersgirl:
I'm a pisces moon and I don't give negative answers like that, I'm quite optimistic in general. However I have seen quite a number of cancer moons answering negatively. It may be cancer moodiness.
Scorpio moons tend to give realistic answers about how they feel.

EDIT: These are all people I'm close to. If we weren't close they would just say "fine". lol


I have a close family member who is a pisces moon and she is painfully positive! When things are going bad she is more transparent than she thinks she is but she still tries to put everything in a positive light. Such a gentle happy person.

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