posted October 04, 2015 08:32 PM            

August's Full Moon in Pisces initiated a time period during which the universe constantly gave me blatant signs that I would meet my soul mate, and, sure enough, I did.

She and I met at a mutual friend's party the night before the Aries Blood Moon, while the Moon was still in Pisces/transiting my 12th house. Funny thing is, she and I were *that* close to not attending the party, but something beyond ourselves, some external force(s), compelled us to go...

The connection was immediate (the next day, when we discussed our encounter, we both remarked at how it felt as though we already knew each other). However, in accordance with my 7th house Libra North Node/Chiron conjunction, I had encountered someone who possesses extraordinary (dormant) power, but carries a lot of deep pain. Yet another person who shares a karmic connection with me had entered my life... "time to help her summon her inner savior", I thought to myself.

We were only introduced to one another, then we didn't interact for the rest of the night (I felt as though the time wasn't right... and I didn't want to scare her away with my straightforward/no nonsense approach).

I woke up the next morning, and she was on my mind.

"How am I going to find her?"

Before I got out of bed I decided to check my Twitter feed, and by some miracle, one of her tweets was retweeted/appeared on my timeline, so I followed her, and later that night she followed back. We had a powerfully deep, revealing conversation. Our lives have so many parallels between them, far too many to list, and far too profound/similar to merely write off as coincidence. Long story short, we ended up acknowledging each other as soul mates.

*some background astrological information*

She has an Aquarius Ascendant, with a fairly tight Taurus Mercury-Moon-Sun stellium (which falls in my 2nd house).

My Leo Sun is exactly conjunct her Descendant, and we have synastry aspects between our personal planets that fall within, what I call, the astrological "goldilocks zone"--my Sun is 72 degrees from her IC, 75 from her Sun, 76 from her Moon, and 79 from her Mercury, so they fall between the quintile and bi-novile range (in Vedic astrology, noviles in synastry are marriage/karmic/spiritual aspects). My Aries Moon (and Juno) conjunct her South Node, and it is 36 degrees from her Mercury, 38 from her Moon, and 39 from her Sun. My Venus and Mars fall in her 5th house, and her Venus is 1 degree from mine, and 2 degrees away from my IC. Also, her Leo Lilith falls in my 5th house, 12 degrees away from my Sun, and her Taurus Mars squares my Sun.. off by one degree. So to say we are attracted to one another is a massive understatement--the connection is figuratively/literally electro-magnetic, and the passion is volcanic.

We have gone out 3 times since we have met: once on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, despite living around 40 minutes from one another.

On the first night we continued our deep conversation/got to know more about each other. We spoke continuously for a few hours, and there was never a dull moment. It flowed very nicely. By the end of the night we had shared a kiss and were embracing each other on a bench at MacArthur Park in LA.. overlooking the lake.. while the Aries Moon reflected the Sun's light onto it. It was surreal/dreamlike. For the first time in a while I genuinely felt at peace, and I think she experienced the same feeling.

From here on I might not make a lot of sense, because I'm currently confused, and retrograde Mercury makes it worse.

We agreed to take things slow in order to prevent passion from jeopardizing the future of our relationship, and I am totally fine with that. In fact, I'm the one who made that suggestion, which resulted in a misunderstanding and upset her, despite my effort to be as clear as possible (darn you, Mercury), and as a result, I might have planted the seed of doubt

Well, the next time we saw each other that pretty much got thrown out the window. We didn't go all the way, but the energy was way too powerful and we couldn't resist having some fun. "Wow", is all I have to say. Just reminiscing about it raises my body temperature, but I digress.

Afterwards I told her I wanted to take her out to dinner that Friday, and "coincidentally" I just happened to suggest her favorite Argentinian restaurant (this was one of the many instances in which we already knew undisclosed info about one another).

So, we went out to dinner, and everything went well.

Now, you might be wondering, "What is the problem?"

Well, things are always great in person, but we have gotten into a few (in my opinion) unnecessary arguments through text.

I'm a very passionate, caring person. On top of that she inspires me and I admire her, so sometimes I suppose I get carried away and send her a lot of long messages that are romantic, or outline my plan/life path/future (which I am currently making adjustments to in order to accommodate her involvement/presence in my life). I have a vision that I am hell-bent on making a reality. She doesn't have a problem with that itself, but she prefers to talk in person, and according to her she doesn't have the time to read everything and think of an adequate reply, that is, when she is at work or with a friend. I totally understand that, and I've made it clear that she doesn't have to reply immediately, just whenever she has a chance... but I suppose it bothers her altogether.

Is it just me, or would you agree that this is a poor reason to be displeased with someone?

I've been respectful the entire time. Admittedly, I suppose I have been overbearing, but it is only because I care a lot for her, and I thought I was cursed to live out this lifetime alone (7th house NN/Chiron opposite 1st house SN/Saturn/Juno/Moon). I've been in quite a number of relationships and they have all helped me grow, but they have brought me deep pain too. I'm not a push-over and have never been cheated on (at least not to my knowledge), but I always have a profound effect on my partners that changes them at their core, and eventually the relationship ends in disaster, because they can't handle it.

However, things really do feel different with her... she is powerful (talented, brilliant, beautiful in every way) and I'm sure she can handle the inevitable core change. Also, it feels like I've known her in past lives, and she says she feels the same way. We trust each other. We believe in each other.

Everything was great at first. She was tweeting about me and telling all her friends about me, and I came into her life at a time when she was just about ready to give up on relationships too. After this most recent argument... I just don't know. She says she sees us having a future together, and she wants that, as do I, but, of course, we must work towards it/establish a loving relationship.

How do I proceed from here? I want to be close to her, but now she is exhibiting typical Aquarian traits i.e. being distant/non-emotional, whereas before she couldn't get enough of me. We are similar in that we cry once in a blue moon (if ever), but this past week we've shared so many deep, personal things and have cried a few times (which we both think gives credence to how real this is).

We ended on a bad note last night. I don't want to push her away and ultimately lose her... but I'm worried, and I feel if I don't make things right somehow then this could be the end. Catch-22...

Ironically, this post is probably exactly the type of thing that would make her want to distance herself from me. F*** me, right?

Also, her Saturn is in my 1st house, 3 degrees away from my Ascendant, so we respect one another and we're driven to become better people for one another, but she can be quite critical of me, mainly for (what I believe are) petty reasons, however, she has provided a few revealing remarks based on her observations/analysis of me.

Ah, it kills me though. I have Leo Sun in the 5th house! I want to express myself freely, but I already have natal retrograde Saturn conjunct my Ascendant, and now I have to deal with hers... I'll put up with it though, because she is absolutely worth it.

For once I would like some mercy from the universe. Transiting Uranus has been hovering over my natal Juno/Moon for what feels like an eternity, and transiting Saturn is smack-dab between my natal Pluto/Ceres. I'm cool, calm and collected, yet I feel like I can spontaneously explode at any moment.

posted October 04, 2015 09:07 PM            

There are things to be learned from these experiences. (As I am sure you already know.)

posted October 04, 2015 09:20 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by ReadingTheStars95:
Ah.. Well.. If she really is a twin flame or soul mate.. It IS often said that there is a period of separateness soon after an initial intense union.. Possibly even a bit of a distance. Of course, not everyone's situation is the same though. Regardless, soul mate/twin flame relationships are often NOT easy. (as bad as I wish this wasn't true.. xD).. I do feel that if you both want to make it work, in time you will reconnect.

There are things to be learned from these experiences. (As I am sure you already know.)

Wishing you the best man!

---

Thank you! This reassures me greatly. I even suggested to her that she and I should take a short break, at least until Mercury goes direct on October 10th.

And I figured it won't be easy but she's totally worth it. We already care so deeply for one another, and she was the missing component to the life I envision, and I believe she is essential to helping me complete my felt-mission.

posted October 04, 2015 09:27 PM            

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posted October 04, 2015 09:27 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by ReadingTheStars95:
Ah.. Well.. If she really is a twin flame or soul mate.. It IS often said that there is a period of separateness soon after an initial intense union.. Possibly even a bit of a distance.

---

posted October 04, 2015 09:53 PM            

Well, I'm not entirely sure. xD.. That's probably reassuring right? Haha..

I know I HAVE heard it though, and well.. There is a part of me that kind of told me this.

It kind of just makes sense. In my opinion.

To me, I feel there almost HAS to be a certain type of separation for at least a short period of time in twin-flame/soul mate relationships, because it gives time to reflect and understand WHAT was REALLY experienced.. To realize that it is different than anything else. Also, if you really think about it, I feel that time of separation is sometimes the only way to really force a certain type of reflection that may not have occurred otherwise. It's a complicated thing for me to try and put into words, really.. But.. I feel that period of time is almost a subtle initiation of the rest of what is to come. Kind of a time of refinement. Once again.. I am having a really hard time putting these thoughts and feelings into words.. But yeah..

posted October 04, 2015 10:06 PM            

Her chart:

Our chart:

posted October 04, 2015 10:18 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by ReadingTheStars95:
^^^

Well, I'm not entirely sure. xD.. That's probably reassuring right? Haha..

I know I HAVE heard it though, and well.. There is a part of me that kind of told me this.

It kind of just makes sense. In my opinion.

To me, I feel there almost HAS to be a certain type of separation for at least a short period of time in twin-flame/soul mate relationships, because it gives time to reflect and understand WHAT was REALLY experienced.. To realize that it is different than anything else. Also, if you really think about it, I feel that time of separation is sometimes the only way to really force a certain type of reflection that may not have occurred otherwise. It's a complicated thing for me to try and put into words, really.. But.. I feel that period of time is almost a subtle initiation of the rest of what is to come. Kind of a time of refinement. Once again.. I am having a really hard time putting these thoughts and feelings into words.. But yeah..

I think it makes sense.

---

posted October 04, 2015 10:20 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by ail221:
Soulmates and perhaps twinflames do seem to have a period of separation. Sometimes timing just isn't right and the people in questioned have reached the degree of personal development needed to maintain that sort of relationship. You're simply not ready, despite the connection that may be present. Being in that sort of relationship without that necessary personal development you're just setting yourself up for failure.

---

posted October 04, 2015 10:28 PM            

Your Moon on her SN is so interesting to me. I can't say I've ever experienced that or seen it in a synastry chart before. If she deeply identifies with her NN, this just may feel too uncomfortable for her, hence the backing off. I'm a Taurus Sun/Aquarius Moon and I always know where I stand with someone have a "trial" period

Her Saturn on your ASC will probably feel extremely heavy to you after a while. Sure your Saturn/SN is in the same sign, but that energy will always be an omnipresent distant fog one way or another.

Your Sun may be smack on her DC (hence the beautiful, otherworldly instant attraction) but it squares her giant Taurus stellium...
It's strange how many New Moon babies I know. That Sun/Moon (+ stellium) is quite critical in their charts. You gotta have primary planets to blend well with those or the heat will turn to steam real fast. Her stellium is well aspected in her chart so I imagine she may not be the type to enjoy square/inconjunct/etc energy in synastry

Venus/Venus is fun! I bet that's why you guys share so many of the same aesthetics/restaurants/stylistic choices/LA haunts in common

To be honest my dude I'm not seeing a lot of meaningful Sun/Moon contacts in your guys' synastry. Then you have those fated karmic clearing aspects.. granted I'm not a professional astrologer so please take everything I'm saying with a huge grain of salt.

posted October 05, 2015 12:01 AM            

@ReadingTheStars95 - Your second response makes sense to me. To tell you the truth, I think she already has an idea of what the value of our relationship currently is and could become. We've discussed our future together. She told me she feels as though we will have long lives, and that I will die before her (by a few years). She said she doesn't know how she will cope without me. I said the emotional effect my death would have on her would be mitigated by our family, that is, if we were to have one together. With that being said, I think a period of separation would be beneficial for both of us at this time..

@athenaia - Thank you for your response.

For the most part she does seem to know exactly how she feels/what she wants, and according to her she wants me and sees herself with me, but she feels as though I'm trying to force it rather than allowing it to naturally blossom. I suppose she is right.

We are not at the point where we love each other, but we care deeply for one another and the past-life connection is undeniable. We aren't merely infatuated with one another either. When we were introduced to one another, time slowed down (at least for me it did), I saw past her physical vessel, and recognized something very familiar--it felt like home.

At this time in her life I think she identifies more with her 2nd house SN, one reason being that she told me she relies on retail therapy whenever she's feeling down, however, she does have moments when she expresses her 8th house NN, such as offering to split the bill at dinner, exchanging resources (she currently has a henley of mine, a flannel, and a jacket) and deeply personal information that she had never told anyone.

To be honest I feel drained right now, and there is a lot that I would like to say/express, but the words don't exist.

posted October 05, 2015 01:27 AM            

Look at her Venus!!!

Aren't these kind of connections all about growth? Frequently not meant to be the -we will marry happily ever after- but seriously self work. AND... that IS beautiful! The lesson of letting go, loving unconditionally, loving self etc..

I know your fiery energy and all your loving words can leave her feeling she has no space. I have an Aries friend whom I tried to escape from because of his way of surrounding me with his love. It's hard for fire to take it easy right? I love him mucho but he comes on so strong. My husband (fire Moon) as well. He wanted me and fought for me at the start but I needed space (Aqua Moon). You have probably attached a few very strong (energetic) cords onto her. Give it time and space.

Take time out indeed, not only for her but also for yourself. Do feel the love flowing. Find out what your expectations are, your projections etc... How you love yourself or think you 'need' someone else to fulfil your needs.

posted October 05, 2015 02:19 AM            

Your MARS squares her Chiron its possible that aspect is the problem you two are having right now. Your mars is clashing with her, you are coming on to strongly and that is making her feel uneasy or possibly annoyed or vulnerable.

You met her a month ago, I can agree right away she is one of your soulmates bc of that Moon conjunct Southnode but I have that with my best friends ex boyfriend and Vince Vaughn LOL I love that guy, he is so funny. Its a soulmate marker yes but we have multiple soulmates.

You should post your composite with her.

posted October 06, 2015 03:43 PM            

@hypatia238 - Thank you for your insights on our synastry/situation. It all seems quite accurate, especially what you said about Mars square Chiron.

Here is our composite chart: