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Author Topic:   Absent mother/father, in one's chart?
HCtheQueenOfWands
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posted March 13, 2016 09:50 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for HCtheQueenOfWands     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Anyone care to elaborate?

Both of my parents were absent in childhood, my mom was working and partying and my father was sick with diabetes, was alcoholic and died in Dec 2008. I was raised basically by an abusive aunt.

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LaceyLeigh
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posted March 13, 2016 11:10 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for LaceyLeigh     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
What's in your 4th, 10th, 12th house?

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Nyctea
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posted March 13, 2016 11:25 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Nyctea     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I read that Sun/Saturn hard aspects could mean absent father. I have the square. My dad was 'absent' emotionally.

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HCtheQueenOfWands
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posted March 13, 2016 11:43 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for HCtheQueenOfWands     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by LaceyLeigh:
What's in your 4th, 10th, 12th house?


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deepseablues
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posted March 14, 2016 12:33 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for deepseablues     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Afflicted Moon = Absent mother in some way most of the time.

I know because I have it myself and through research.

Absent father can be harder to find I think though I agree that Sun-Saturn afflictions are one indication.

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Pisces Plutonian
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posted March 14, 2016 12:47 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Pisces Plutonian     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
This is just my observation but people with many planets in Aquarius seem to be raised without a father and it always seem to be true.

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Piscean Tigress
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posted March 14, 2016 01:32 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Piscean Tigress     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Pluto in hard aspect with Sun means an absent father. I have opposition between them and I seen my father twice or three times in my life. I don't know if he still alive.

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Sylven
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posted March 14, 2016 02:06 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Sylven     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Piscean Tigress:
Pluto in hard aspect with Sun means an absent father. I have opposition between them and I seen my father twice or three times in my life. I don't know if he still alive.

Not necessarily absent. I have Pluto sq Sun. My dad was around a lot. He had his own business next to our home. When he was 'there' like really there he asked about grades and those questions. Not about how I felt and stuff. You can call that emotionally absent. We clashed big time. So different and yet, so many similar traits I found out when I got older. Still after all these years I think he did a good job. I wasn't easy.

A controlling dad (pluto in aspect to the sun). The trine as well but harder to get away from because the aspect is so flowing. The square makes it easier to get away from it. I ran away from home when I was 18 because of my dad and because I felt extremely caged I couldn't stand it (believe me, it was probably just normal but my Uranus had to break out, so selfish!!). Later on everything was fixed luckily. A friend of mine has Pluto trine Sun and her dad was crazy. He abused her emotionally and physically. She didn't escape. Didn't find the power so to say.

Absent father can be Saturn in 12th.

My husband has Sun/Saturn conjunct in 12th. His dad was around. I guess he wasn't emotionally bonded so much but I guess for a guy, who frequently don't talk about that stuff it's less difficult to deal with. Though, later in life this person can have problems getting in touch with this I guess.

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ReadingTheStars95
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posted March 14, 2016 02:15 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for ReadingTheStars95     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Piscean Tigress: I somewhat agree. I also have Sun opposite Pluto. My father has not been absent, but, I don't see him much. I never have, really. He's always been kind of distant with me. I believe as of recently that hopefully this is changing.

I feel like the Inonjunct between Mars and the Sun could somewhat symbolize an absent father in this chart. Especially with Saturn square Chiron.

Also, there is that Saturn-Mars opposition. That could be something. Especially considering Saturn is the ruler of your IC/4th house.

WAIT. I can't believe I almost missed it. Neptune in the 4th. To me, that explains a lot of it. I know that is an aspect seen a lot in people who have parents who are either absent or have addictions. Pisces IC or 4th house Neptune can show a somewhat tragic home life in general. But, especially in the regards to absence and addiction.. Or, having a parent that is weak or unable to care for themselves. (Or having bad health in general)

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Sylven
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posted March 14, 2016 02:16 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Sylven     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by HCtheQueenOfWands:
Anyone care to elaborate?

Both of my parents were absent in childhood, my mom was working and partying and my father was sick with diabetes, was alcoholic and died in Dec 2008. I was raised basically by an abusive aunt.


I am so sorry to hear that.

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next to neptune
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posted March 14, 2016 03:03 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for next to neptune     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I have had an absent mother (mainly because she was sick and we had many family problems with my brother who was also sick)

My moon is afflicted by uranus, mars and sun. And my sun is in the 4th house also...

My father has also always been a bit distant, but thats more to do with his personality though... I dont have any sun/pluto or sun/saturn aspect though...

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LaceyLeigh
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posted March 14, 2016 03:11 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for LaceyLeigh     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I'd look to Neptune in your 4th house as your perpetrator.

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HCtheQueenOfWands
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posted March 14, 2016 06:07 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for HCtheQueenOfWands     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Sylven:
Not necessarily absent. I have Pluto sq Sun. My dad was around a lot. He had his own business next to our home. When he was 'there' like really there he asked about grades and those questions. Not about how I felt and stuff. You can call that emotionally absent. We clashed big time. So different and yet, so many similar traits I found out when I got older. Still after all these years I think he did a good job. I wasn't easy.

A controlling dad (pluto in aspect to the sun). The trine as well but harder to get away from because the aspect is so flowing. The square makes it easier to get away from it. I ran away from home when I was 18 because of my dad and because I felt extremely caged I couldn't stand it (believe me, it was probably just normal but my Uranus had to break out, so selfish!!). Later on everything was fixed luckily. A friend of mine has Pluto trine Sun and her dad was crazy. He abused her emotionally and physically. She didn't escape. Didn't find the power so to say.

Absent father can be Saturn in 12th.

My husband has Sun/Saturn conjunct in 12th. His dad was around. I guess he wasn't emotionally bonded so much but I guess for a guy, who frequently don't talk about that stuff it's less difficult to deal with. Though, later in life this person can have problems getting in touch with this I guess.


My sister has Sun conj Saturn in 12th.

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HCtheQueenOfWands
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posted March 14, 2016 06:12 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for HCtheQueenOfWands     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Sylven:
Not necessarily absent. I have Pluto sq Sun. My dad was around a lot. He had his own business next to our home. When he was 'there' like really there he asked about grades and those questions. Not about how I felt and stuff. You can call that emotionally absent. We clashed big time. So different and yet, so many similar traits I found out when I got older. Still after all these years I think he did a good job. I wasn't easy.

A controlling dad (pluto in aspect to the sun). The trine as well but harder to get away from because the aspect is so flowing. The square makes it easier to get away from it. I ran away from home when I was 18 because of my dad and because I felt extremely caged I couldn't stand it (believe me, it was probably just normal but my Uranus had to break out, so selfish!!). Later on everything was fixed luckily. A friend of mine has Pluto trine Sun and her dad was crazy. He abused her emotionally and physically. She didn't escape. Didn't find the power so to say.

Absent father can be Saturn in 12th.

My husband has Sun/Saturn conjunct in 12th. His dad was around. I guess he wasn't emotionally bonded so much but I guess for a guy, who frequently don't talk about that stuff it's less difficult to deal with. Though, later in life this person can have problems getting in touch with this I guess.


My stepdad is very controlling, my mom was absent till i was 15 and came back with my stepdad and has the nerve to break my stuff and ruin my relationships and my mom has the nerve to ask me to do stuff for her like cook and all that after she verbally abuses me and use to beat me! 😠😭

Mom is ♎️, hes an ♈️

Its okay im in better place with my Gemini fiancÚ

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Koniucha
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posted March 14, 2016 07:24 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Koniucha     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
My daughter has Pisces IC. Also Sun square Pluto.

I am no longer with her father. He was controlling and we just weren't meant to be. He does not see her very often. He is basically a bum. Not working, not helping me out financially, although I finally did the papers for child support. He does drink quite a bit.

I do work full time, but have a work schedule that allows me to be with my daughter often. I am very active in her life. My side of the family also helps out a lot.

My daughter is very sensitive to the world (also has a Pisces moon)

I admit too that I never feel like I do enough. Like I could have done something different or more. But that is my own issue to work out.

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Hemilla
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posted March 14, 2016 09:16 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Hemilla     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
My dad is pretty much absent through my whole life - even though he was there,still is .

He cared about his friends,his lover (cheated on my mother didnt even try to hide it) and gambled(still does - has spent a fortune gambling ,even money for his fathers funeral) - he worked as personal driver first and then as taxi driver - wich hellps with his absence.

My family life in general is tense, i lived with my grandad and grandma also,and my aunt who has no children would allways meddle in our buisnes - they disliked my mum (still do) and she is very stuborn woman (moon in Aries) - neither of them backs down. She is addicted to cigaretes.

It's a constant stress living in this family - they are all good people in general,but when they are tigether they are living hell.

My dad was spoiled by his parents and is not responsible person atall. I dread idea that my husdband could have his traits,dread it.

I nataly have Sun square Saturn,wich i see is mentioned here.

My IC is in libra,wich i see as my strugle to balance my mother and father and his side of family - i dream of living in peacefull family without stress.

Now this are aspects my father has in his chart.

Asc in Sag - ruler of asc in 8th in cancer conjunct uranus
Sun in Pisces in 3rd
Now my father has this positions-
Moon (ruler of 8th) conjunct Pluto(ruler of 12th) in Leo (that falls in my first house) in 9th
Venus in aqua conjunct chiron in second house - sqares neptune and mars
Mars in Taurus in 5th square Venus opposition Nept
Mercury (ruler of dc) opposes moon pluto
Neptune in libra in 11th
He has Saturn in 12th

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Sylven
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posted March 14, 2016 10:26 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Sylven     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
We all have our issues with growing up, parents, family, school. We came here to face that something which is also in our charts. Once we have learned to balance that out we will no longer be bothered by it, my view. More so mastered it. So basically we do not longer have to project on a certain area. We need to take responsibility and master it. Than we are the creators of our lives! That doesn't mean we condone bad behaviour but it means much self awareness. Stepping into a place where we can consciously choose. What needs do we have, where does it come from, why do we have that need? Why does it bother us, what does it touch in ourselves, what place needs healing? This can also mean walking away from abuse because you have become aware of self worth. Self worth and stepping up, being assertive can be a theme for you. For me it was dealing with authority for one.

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Koniucha
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posted March 14, 2016 10:30 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Koniucha     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I have a hard time reading these posts regarding troubled family life, etc.

I swear, the worst part for me with astrology has been over analyzing my daughters chart. I have cried a lot when I have found something. Then suffer through extreme bouts of guilt, thinking what I could have done differently.

Like previous poster said, we all have baggage regarding our families.

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Sylven
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posted March 14, 2016 10:34 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Sylven     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Koniucha:
My daughter has Pisces IC. Also Sun square Pluto.

I am no longer with her father. He was controlling and we just weren't meant to be. He does not see her very often. He is basically a bum. Not working, not helping me out financially, although I finally did the papers for child support. He does drink quite a bit.

I do work full time, but have a work schedule that allows me to be with my daughter often. I am very active in her life. My side of the family also helps out a lot.

My daughter is very sensitive to the world (also has a Pisces moon)

I admit too that I never feel like I do enough. Like I could have done something different or more. But that is my own issue to work out.


Yes!! You are enough! And you have done enough! You have done a great job! Compliments to you!! Why do you want to do better than your best, you already did and you are great!!

Not to say that these kind of aspects is very much of the child itself. She may project it unless she starts being aware of her energy. My daughter has Moon square Pluto. Much is HER energy. Demanding (Mercury conjunct Pluto) and hunger for satisfaction or feeling unsafe etc.. But of course I am here as a mirror to her. Very interesting. Our bond is amazing and very close, that's also Pluto squares possibility. And yes, I admit I can also be a bit controlling, but only with hygiene! Haha, She has Moon in Virgo... surprise! I am crazy when it comes to that!

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Sylven
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posted March 14, 2016 10:37 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Sylven     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Koniucha:
I have a hard time reading these posts regarding troubled family life, etc.

I swear, the worst part for me with astrology has been over analyzing my daughters chart. I have cried a lot when I have found something. Then suffer through extreme bouts of guilt, thinking what I could have done differently.

Like previous poster said, we all have baggage regarding our families.


And then just choose to stop!! You have done the right thing! Your daughter loves you so very much!! The way you are writing this only shows how much you care. I know because I am a little the same. Over analysing and such. You can only do so much. Love her and do your best. What more can you do?

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Sylven
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posted March 14, 2016 10:40 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Sylven     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:

WAIT. I can't believe I almost missed it. Neptune in the 4th. To me, that explains a lot of it. I know that is an aspect seen a lot in people who have parents who are either absent or have addictions. Pisces IC or 4th house Neptune can show a somewhat tragic home life in general. But, especially in the regards to absence and addiction.. Or, having a parent that is weak or unable to care for themselves. (Or having bad health in general)[/B]

YES!!!

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Electro DGX
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posted March 14, 2016 10:42 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Electro DGX     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Koniucha:
I admit too that I never feel like I do enough. Like I could have done something different or more. But that is my own issue to work out.

Do you have some sort of Mars - Saturn affliction? I have Mars opposite Saturn this I feel this way 24/7, despite people telling me that I've come so far. I'm constantly pushing myself because I feel like I could do better.

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Koniucha
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posted March 14, 2016 11:27 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Koniucha     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Electro DGX:
Do you have some sort of Mars - Saturn affliction? I have Mars opposite Saturn this I feel this way 24/7, despite people telling me that I've come so far. I'm constantly pushing myself because I feel like I could do better.

No. I have Venus conjunct Saturn and Mars in the 12th. I am currently going through a 12th house Saturn transit and have been feeling extreme guilt. My daughter finished her 12th house Saturn transit recently. We are both Sag asc.

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Mergoatsun
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posted March 14, 2016 11:47 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Mergoatsun     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Your IC is in 1 degree of Capricorn, which is not a good aspect. I noticed that right away in your chart, I also noticed Sun square Pluto (3) the sun can represent the father, but also represents the main caregiver, the square with Pluto can represent the abuse or neglect. Many abused people have this in their charts. Your sun is also opposite your 12th house, which can mean a number of things. Do some more digging and research, there is a lot of interesting things about your chart

------------------
"Do not let the behavior of others destroy your inner peace."
-Dalai Lama

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Faith
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posted March 14, 2016 11:49 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Faith     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
My parents died when I was relatively young.

4H Uranus + Scorpio NN
8H moon, afflicted
6H sun in mutual reception w/ 12H Saturn
Sun square Pluto

My sympathy to others with absent parents.

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