posted July 29, 2016 08:03 PM            

People in there are posting how many days they are up to and the day they have 'relapsed' (giving up, the urge to masturbate again).
There are many reporting it has increased their drive 'like an energiser bunny' to make their life better, they love themselves more, not scared of rejection as much as they are used to, many have also reported gaining more female attention. One reported 'the satisfaction of resisting the urge and entangling from the psychological downward spiral where it has tangled me for a long time is satisfying

posted July 29, 2016 09:41 PM            

Going by how you worded the question, I believe you think it's a noble, good thing. Maybe it is, but I have my concerns about it, and I'm going to share those here as you asked for my female perspective (which aren't universal by any means). I know some are searching for validation and fake thoughts rather than actual thoughts, but I take such questions at face value and give honest thoughts. Likewise, I'm neither insecure nor heterosexual, so someone watching porn doesn't really bother me, and I'd have no desire to look or act like most porn stars (nor desire the men in them) so I don't get jealous. That caveat out of the way...

x

Is it people taking their power back, or is it people reaching for another momentary feel good solution that does nothing because it's the new fad? Could be a bit of both.

'Course any kind of addiction or obsessive behavior is bad, but so is complete suppression. And those who recover from alcoholism sometimes become "dry drunks" (that is, they have all the same negative traits of when they're drinking without the drinking, like poor interaction skills or inappropriate behavior, only now they can't blame being drunk for it) and I'd wonder how many are like that. And yet perhaps that is a Pluto Scorpio thing, given how both like to go to extremes, even when unhealthy to do so.

That said, impulse control is very important to me. They may feel like punching something (maybe you), but they better control it. A man or woman may want to cheat sexually or even romantically, but I expect them to control their impulses like a grown up rather than act without self-control like an impulsive child unaware or uncaring of consequences. But this doesn't mean they must repress themselves like a Puritan or pretend they don't get angry, only to abide by their agreements and obligations and not be stupid (something that addiction/obsession interferes with greatly, though I wonder how many addicts just lack mature impulse control). It's not the impulses and feelings that define a person to me so much as the ones they choose to act on and how they do so.

x

As for porn itself, I find most of it really silly and don't see the appeal. Perhaps that's part of my demisexuality. But in any case, I think people who mistake porn (and also many romances) for real life need to get a clue in that life works very differently than that, even when so many are TRYING to make the BS fantasy a reality. Furthermore, it's often unhealthy to try to imitate it (and that goes for the romances for women as much as the porn for men). If I were more conspiracy-minded, I'd think romances and porn were promoted not only as a profitable venture, but in their specific unhealthy way that most are so as to maximize dissatisfaction and insecurity among both genders so that corporations can sell them more stuff that's suppose to "fix" the problem in themselves (when the actual problem comes from those trying to sell them a cure).

I suspect many guys who sexually harassed me and got angry when I rejected them were big into porn. Maybe that's because they were frustrated as their obnoxiousness that they considered seductive didn't work for them, but I've seen those same ways of initiating sex in porn, and if the guys thinking that's real expect it to work, then that help explains why they get angry at me for not "following the script," because at some level think that I'd respond sexually to about any other guy who did the same thing, that is I'm rejecting him personally rather than his technique. Granted, there probably is the 1 in 10 times it works for them and that's what they focus on, but in that case, why are they wasting time telling me (sometimes yelling) that I'm a stuck up ***** (sometimes still hoping that I'll change my mind even as they talk to me that way) rather than moving on to find that rare 1 in 10?