posted November 01, 2016 02:20 PM            

So, there is this guy, with a Scorpio stellium - Sun, Moon, Mercury and Pluto. Also Mars in Aries. We are not in a relationship, we met a few times.
For me, deep emotional connection is very important during sex, basically the reason why I want to do it. To feel that deep connection with the other person. He seems to have a similar approach to this, and when it happened I really felt the emotional connection, not just on my side, and the passion also, it was extremely intense.

But according to him, it's just sex, and he can separate the emotional side from it. So, according to him, he doesn't feel anything for me, he likes to spend time together and that's all. But what I don't understand, how can someone be so emotional in every way during sex, feel the emotional connection then, say that he actually feels it and it is what he wants, but just during sex. Otherwise he can separate the two, and there is no emotional connection there.
I know the difference between men and women, related to this, but if someone can feel this connection during sex (so it's not just a mechanical thing), how can it just go away after, regardless of the gender and different "wiring"?

posted November 01, 2016 10:27 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Cinnamon sky:
but if someone can feel this connection during sex (so it's not just a mechanical thing), how can it just go away after, regardless of the gender and different "wiring"?

---

First off, there are definitely women who experience that as well; and second... I think it's because there's something very unique about sexual experiences that doesn't necessarily transpire into "daily" life - the sensations and feelings are enhanced, and once the experience is over, everything goes back to "normal". And that "normal" state may be very different from the one during the sexual intimacy.

posted November 01, 2016 10:44 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Doux Rêve:
First off, there are definitely women who experience that as well; and second... I think it's because there's something very unique about sexual experiences that doesn't necessarily transpire into "daily" life - the sensations and feelings are enhanced, and once the experience is over, everything goes back to "normal". And that "normal" state may be very different from the one during the sexual intimacy.

It's possible to feel very connected to someone during sexual intimacy, but overall feel quite disconnected from them in other areas in life - mental, emotional, or just personality-wise... So it doesn't strike me as something weird.

---

Or the opposite too feel not connected emotionally during sex but feel connected emotionally when not having sex...

posted November 02, 2016 02:57 AM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Doux Rêve:

It's possible to feel very connected to someone during sexual intimacy, but overall feel quite disconnected from them in other areas in life - mental, emotional, or just personality-wise... So it doesn't strike me as something weird.

---

Hm, I partially agree, but I see this happening in the sense that two people are not resonating with each other in the "daily life" so that they are not compatible to be in an actual relationship, but then, if there is this connection they have that draws them to each other and manifests on an intense emotional level during sex, doesn't that mean that there is an emotional connection between them? Only some people rationalise it away after, or they are able to compartmentalise their emotions. Which is not something I can or even want to do with my Cancer moon

posted November 02, 2016 03:58 PM            

Anyway, I appreciate the diversity there is, and it's fascinating how different we all are emotions-wise. Even though it hurts sometimes...

The closest people in my life are Scorpio influenced people, but it's definitely not easy for me to figure them out. But I think that's true for both sides. Maybe that's why we are drawn to each other, lol.

posted November 02, 2016 04:07 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Mystic_Cat:
I have a Scorpio stellium/ish of Venus, N.N, Jupiter, Pluto and Juno

---

posted November 04, 2016 12:18 PM            

The emotional bond they show during sex it's for the act itself, not for the other person; so when all has finished, they can be as nothing happened.

They don't lie, if he say "it's just sex", you are not in his mind before or after sex. Sex it's sex and they know better than any other sign.

To be deep involved with someone, they like to test the strength, and when they know that they can share the emotional part of their life with you, they are extremely loyal and faithfull to you and just you, but that it's often after secuencial "tests" they choose.

posted November 06, 2016 11:37 AM            

If you look at my ex chart sex is meaningful to him, his 5H ruler is Saturn and it conjuncts Jupiter in the 1H. His 8H ruler is Mars and it conjuncts Neptune which rules his 7H in the 4H none the less and that sextiles his Venus in Libra conjunct Pluto, lovely.

^He makes love when he has sex, releases all his energy and imprints it in you, I feel he does get attached with someone when he has sex and he is the type that sex often leads to a relationship and commitment.

He also has moon in Pisces very well aspected; trine his sun, biquintile Venus and pluto, square Neptune and trine Uranus by 10d though.

I fell for him and not any of the other Scorpios for a reason, not all Scorpios imo are created equal

posted November 06, 2016 12:06 PM            

Anyway, although I prefer a stable, secure, and emotionally intense union, I often notice my mars in Sagittarius jumping the gun and diving head first into spontaneous love affairs with no real lasting element to it. My mars is my most aspected planet and conjunct the NN in the 7th so my response might be a little bias.

I do know though, fire mars crave adventure and action. We need something to keep our fire going or we're always searching for different flames to keep our candle burning. This can be in the form of sex, intimacy, etc but separating emotion from drive comes naturally to us. I'm sure it's worse for males.

However, this can also be viewed as advantageous because he can still develop feelings for you.

Speaking from my own personal experiences, I can start out just having sex with someone but eventually start to like the person but let's be clear, sex had nothing to do with it. Two separate entities.

What I can suggest if you really like this guy is remove sex from the table completely and try forming a friendship with him first and see what happens.

Scorpios are pretty much confident in choosing a partner so if it's a no go it's usually a no go but there are those instances where we misjudged a person and romantic connection in which the other person will wake us up. It's happened to on several different occasions.

Scorpios have so many layers ready so imagine a stellium.. we are a walking ball of contradiction, mystery, and fascination but might be annoying and unnecessary to more outgoing, airy types.

posted November 06, 2016 12:08 PM            

Anyway, although I prefer a stable, secure, and emotionally intense union, I often notice my mars in Sagittarius jumping the gun and diving head first into spontaneous love affairs with no real lasting element to it. My mars is my most aspected planet and conjunct the NN in the 7th so my response might be a little bias.

I do know though, fire mars crave adventure and action. We need something to keep our fire going or we're always searching for different flames to keep our candle burning. This can be in the form of sex, intimacy, etc but separating emotion from drive comes naturally to us. I'm sure it's worse for males.

However, this can also be viewed as advantageous because he can still develop feelings for you.

Speaking from my own personal experiences, I can start out just having sex with someone but eventually start to like the person but let's be clear, sex had nothing to do with it. Two separate entities.

What I can suggest if you really like this guy is remove sex from the table completely and try forming a friendship with him first and see what happens.

Scorpios are pretty much confident in choosing a partner so if it's a no go it's usually a no go but there are those instances where we misjudged a person and romantic connection in which the other person will wake us up. It's happened to on several different occasions.

Scorpios have so many layers ready so imagine a stellium.. we are a walking ball of contradiction, mystery, and fascination but might be annoying and unnecessary to more outgoing, airy types.

posted November 06, 2016 06:56 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by hypatia238:
Idk I would find out his birth time and chart rulers of 5th house and 8th house. I have slept with a lot of Scorpios and sex with them didn't mean anything to me but with one of them it meant a lot, my ex.

If you look at my ex chart sex is meaningful to him, his 5H ruler is Saturn and it conjuncts Jupiter in the 1H. His 8H ruler is Mars and it conjuncts Neptune which rules his 7H in the 4H none the less and that sextiles his Venus in Libra conjunct Pluto, lovely.

^He makes love when he has sex, releases all his energy and imprints it in you, I feel he does get attached with someone when he has sex and he is the type that sex often leads to a relationship and commitment.

---

I think me and your ex have a few similarities in our charts, haha. I guess he is also Virgo rising, right? I'd be curious why you'd say that 5th house ruler Saturn conjunct Jupiter in the 1st would show that sex is meaningful to him? I also have that, but in the 2nd instead of first.

Anyway, I can totally relate to your description, both as myself and as a person I could be attracted to.

I also have Mars conjunct Moon, so yeah, probably that reflects that I can't really detach emotionally.

Nonetheless, I don't want a relationship (just came out of a long one...). What I want is to explore this emotional connection or whatever connection I felt is/was happening. Because I never felt this intensity during sex. I know it sounds like crazy scientist talk, but I just can't let this go, because it fascinates me.
Though in an angry moment of mine I deleted him from Facebook, so not sure about this

In the same time I can see it this way: if I was able to have this intense experience with him that means I am able to have it with other people as well. For me it's about connecting to people on a very deep level, and I think this guy actually helped me tap into my own ability to do that. So yeah, Scorpios and their healing power

posted November 06, 2016 10:02 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Cinnamon sky:
I think me and your ex have a few similarities in our charts, haha. I guess he is also Virgo rising, right? I'd be curious why you'd say that 5th house ruler Saturn conjunct Jupiter in the 1st would show that sex is meaningful to him? I also have that, but in the 2nd instead of first.

Anyway, I can totally relate to your description, both as myself and as a person I could be attracted to.

I also have Mars conjunct Moon, so yeah, probably that reflects that I can't really detach emotionally.

---

I don't see the point of having sex unless you emotionally connect sexually so consider your mars conjunct moon a beautiful gift but be picky who you share that gift with which having saturn ruling your 5H and Virgo rising should help tremendously with that

To answer your question the 5th house is the house of romance, casual sex and sex before marriage or before forming a serious commitment when Saturn is ruling your 5h you are not a big fan of casual sex as saturn thinks about the future and things such as is this person worth investing my time on so when Saturn rules the 5h it will have sex with someone with the hopes that it will develop into something serious with substance. They like partners who are mature, will commit and not bail easily, they don't like flakiness and want someone realistic about relationships and that have good relationship skills. Now what they want is a bit different from what they attract bc Neptune rules their 7H and this is what they attract: hopeless romantics who put them up in a pedestal and have unrealistic expectations about love and relationships.

Jupiter rules legal marriage and it expands everything it touches so it conjuncting the 5H ruler Saturn reinforces this tendency to have sex with the agenda that it will develop into a relationship. Further with this placement is easy to trap that person by getting pregnant, something I could never do to a guy. Someone with Saturn ruling the 5th house conjunct Jupiter will get married if their partner gets pregnant and stay married for the child and take this very seriously. For them you get married bc you are ready to have a child.

posted November 07, 2016 06:47 PM            

I'm actually in my 30s, so yeah not sure about the children part in my case.

posted November 07, 2016 08:31 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by Cinnamon sky:
Thanks for the clarifications, Hypatia.
I can see what you mean about Saturn in the 5th being attracted to serious people who don't bail out on the person and have some kind of future relationship plan. But in my case I am not really attracted to the Capricorn type at all. I'm more attracted to my 7th (and 8th) house maybe, Neptune types. But in the same time if I think about it, the combination of these two is actually what attracts me - strong on the outside, emotional and soft on the inside - or something

I'm actually in my 30s, so yeah not sure about the children part in my case.

And 5th Saturn with Virgo rising is very helpful with discernment indeed, but when my Cancer Moon/Mars square Pluto gets hooked, every other thing gets just thrown out the window, including any possible Virgo&Saturn assistance - at least for a while, then I'll get back to center and ask myself, what the hell just happened

---

I am in my 30s too so very cool you are as well and I don't have kids either, I read Sun in Virgo folks tend to have kids later if they do have kids bc Saturn rules their 5th house if we put Virgo in the first house. Or it may deny them of having children all together.

At this point I don't feel I need to have children to be happy and am kind of scare of that huge responsibility but I use to want that more than anything in the world at some point in my life and put the whole motherhood thing in a pedestal thinking it was going just going to be great, easy and peachy; brought to you by Neptune ruling my 5H I think.

Yeah I imagine your ideal will have Neptunian influence strong in their chart with some Saturn key aspects even though they are not Capricorns.

For example my ex has Virgo rising like you so Neptune rules his 7H and my strongest planet is Neptune and I have moon in Pisces on his DC but Saturn conjuncts my chart ruler Pluto...he definitely got a Neptunian girl when he found me.

In my case Venus rules my 7H and he has Venus in Libra and his strongest planet is Venus in his chart. Further Neptune rules my 5H and he has moon in Pisces, he also has Mars conjunct Neptune which both conjuncts my Neptune 5H ruler.