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Author Topic:   Funny thread for Hypatia
CosmiqPhuz
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posted December 14, 2016 12:17 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for CosmiqPhuz     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Reasons why each sign can't get a job

Aries - doesn't realize they can't automatically receive the supervisor position. In the interview, they're already telling the owner/boss what to do...

Taurus - can't find a decent outfit beneath all the snack bags and wrappers

Gemini - interview was going ok, but somehow the conversation got steered to what STDs he has and how/who/where/when he got them...

Cancer - too busy being butt hurt about getting laid off from his last job for asking the hot coworker to breast feed him...

Leo - too proud to risk rejection. Would rather stay home and see how many ways she can wear her hair.....in the dark....with no running water...or electricity...bills piling up....

Virgo - can't stand other people breathing in the same building. Marries a doctor but divorces him because he caught a cold from his patient. She then marries a business man but divorces him because he touches money (with germs on them). She eventually becomes a billionaire from collecting alimony from 10 ex-husbands...

Libra - doesn't wanna break a nail.....and he's a guy.....

Scorpio - does not want to jeopardize his quality marathon masturbating time....

Sagittarius - Got fired because he didn't feel like showing up one too many times. Optimistic for the future, he can give handjobs to guys in the alleys ($50 a pop), develop carpal tunnel, and then apply for disability checks. Everything's gonna be alright...

Capricorn - paralyzed from a stroke because of working 100 hours a week. Still the cornerstone of society, he works as a doorstop at the local nursing home. He's not being paid though, but he doesn't know that...

Aquarius - does not want to stoop down to the common man's level of daily labor - he's too genius for that. He's got better things to do and places to be - as soon as he's done leveling up his character on World of Warcraft...

Pisces - can't pass any drug tests. Even the jobs with no drug tests can tell from a mile away he's on something. Gets arrested for drugs on purpose so he can get to live in jail with meals, a bed, TV, shower sex...

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mirage29
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posted December 14, 2016 12:34 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for mirage29     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
I'm not a Virgo... but I liked this one! LOL

quote:
Virgo - can't stand other people breathing in the same building. Marries a doctor but divorces him because he caught a cold from his patient. She then marries a business man but divorces him because he touches money (with germs on them). She eventually becomes a billionaire from collecting alimony from 10 ex-husbands...

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hypatia238
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posted December 14, 2016 12:40 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for hypatia238     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
∆ I like the Virgo one too but for some reason Aries was my favorite, it reminds me of a previous client of mine who is a teen Aries, cool kid.

Sag to Pisces are right on.

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Piscean Tigress
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posted December 14, 2016 12:45 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Piscean Tigress     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Why related Pisces to drugs?

Sounds better "exccesive dream living time"?

Drugs it's a way to escape "reality", but think in a "dreaming world" it's another way to escape for pisceans, and it's stronger than use drugs.

Btw I'm pisces and I never use "hard drugs" or alcohol. just ciggarretes.

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hypatia238
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posted December 14, 2016 12:50 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for hypatia238     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Piscean Tigress:
Why related Pisces to drugs?

Sounds better "exccesive dream living time"?

Drugs it's a way to escape "reality", but think in a "dreaming world" it's another way to escape for pisceans, and it's stronger than use drugs.

Btw I'm pisces and I never use "hard drugs" or alcohol. just ciggarretes.


Cigarettes is definitely a drug sweetie but understand these are all jokes truly not meant to be taken seriously and feel free to share your own version, would love that.

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UrsusBlack
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posted December 14, 2016 01:05 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for UrsusBlack     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
"Do you think that smoking drugs is cool? Do you think that doing alcohol is cool?"

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AC: Sagittarius
Sun: Scorpio in the 11th
Moon: Scorpio in the 11th

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Piscean Tigress
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posted December 14, 2016 01:08 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Piscean Tigress     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
No problem Hypatia, I know that ciggarretes are a kind of drug and it's a funny thread.

"Living in the clouds" it's funny too, and piseans can't get a job because they are too busy living in their dream world, or are too sleepy to get up, for example.

Just a humble opinion

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UrsusBlack
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posted December 14, 2016 01:09 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for UrsusBlack     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
You mean other people don't spend their entire day masturbating?!!

Love them all. Especially the Virgo/Sagittarius ones. :P

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AC: Sagittarius
Sun: Scorpio in the 11th
Moon: Scorpio in the 11th

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CosmiqPhuz
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posted December 14, 2016 01:10 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for CosmiqPhuz     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Piscean Tigress:
Why related Pisces to drugs?

Sounds better "exccesive dream living time"?

Drugs it's a way to escape "reality", but think in a "dreaming world" it's another way to escape for pisceans, and it's stronger than use drugs.

Btw I'm pisces and I never use "hard drugs" or alcohol. just ciggarretes.


Sorry girl, I'm showing no mercy to anyone! Everyone's dumb!


quote:
Originally posted by UrsusBlack:
You mean other people don't spend their entire day masturbating?!!

I just recently found this out...shocking...

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Piscean Tigress
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posted December 14, 2016 01:14 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Piscean Tigress     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by UrsusBlack:
You mean other people don't spend their entire day masturbating?!!


No like the Scorpios
Maybe Taurus or Aries, but less

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UrsusBlack
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posted December 14, 2016 01:20 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for UrsusBlack     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
A very shocking revelation indeed.

I thought Taurus were too busy raiding the fridge and Aries were too busy arguing to have the time for that?

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AC: Sagittarius
Sun: Scorpio in the 11th
Moon: Scorpio in the 11th

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Piscean Tigress
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posted December 14, 2016 01:24 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Piscean Tigress     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by UrsusBlack:
A very shocking revelation indeed.

I thought Taurus were too busy raiding the fridge and Aries were too busy arguing to have the time for that?


You asked, so I just answered

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CosmiqPhuz
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posted December 14, 2016 01:38 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for CosmiqPhuz     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by UrsusBlack:
A very shocking revelation indeed.

I thought Taurus were too busy raiding the fridge and Aries were too busy arguing to have the time for that?


I'm sure Taurus is talented enough to munch on a chicken sandwich while he chokes the chicken.

Aries will play with himself while looking in the mirror because he thinks he's so great. Somehow, he'll argue with himself in the mirror because he's a cocky idiot.

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UrsusBlack
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posted December 14, 2016 01:49 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for UrsusBlack     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Almost spit out my drink reading that. Brilliant.

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AC: Sagittarius
Sun: Scorpio in the 11th
Moon: Scorpio in the 11th

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hypatia238
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posted December 14, 2016 10:20 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for hypatia238     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by UrsusBlack:
You mean other people don't spend their entire day masturbating?!!

Love them all. Especially the Virgo/Sagittarius ones. :P


Lmao

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Faith
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posted December 14, 2016 10:29 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Faith     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
OMG

"Everything's gonna be alright..."

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hypatia238
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posted December 14, 2016 10:35 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for hypatia238     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by CosmiqPhuz:
I'm sure Taurus is talented enough to munch on a chicken sandwich while he chokes the chicken.

Aries will play with himself while looking in the mirror because he thinks he's so great. Somehow, he'll argue with himself in the mirror because he's a cocky idiot.



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teasel
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posted December 14, 2016 10:39 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for teasel     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by CosmiqPhuz:
I'm sure Taurus is talented enough to munch on a chicken sandwich while he chokes the chicken.

Aries will play with himself while looking in the mirror because he thinks he's so great. Somehow, he'll argue with himself in the mirror because he's a cocky idiot.


Let's not go that far.

Your first post was funny to me, because last night, I told dad I could never have been in the military - I'm not good at taking orders.

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CosmiqPhuz
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posted December 14, 2016 11:49 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for CosmiqPhuz     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by teasel:
Let's not go that far.

Your first post was funny to me, because last night, I told dad I could never have been in the military - I'm not good at taking orders.


Watch it, you don't wanna exceed your arguing quota for the day


quote:
Originally posted by UrsusBlack:
Almost spit out my drink reading that. Brilliant.

Haha, thanks


quote:
Originally posted by Faith:
OMG

"Everything's gonna be alright..."


Yes, rolling around is the best! Especially in bed with a hottie.

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hypatia238
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posted December 14, 2016 01:59 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for hypatia238     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by teasel:
Let's not go that far.

Your first post was funny to me, because last night, I told dad I could never have been in the military - I'm not good at taking orders.


You and I both girl, Pluto and Mars ruling your chart with Sun ruling your 10H can do that but I keep it in check at work bc having a pleasant work environment is very important to me as well as having a job and protecting my resume/reputation (saturn conjuncting my pluto and venus conjuncting my mars in the 10H help with this), I like to get along with my team. I hate been micro managed or controlled or feeling my talents or mind are not been appreciated, I need supervisors that build me up, see my value and that trust me and don't micromanage me or I will leave sooner than later.

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hypatia238
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posted December 14, 2016 02:00 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for hypatia238     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Faith:
OMG

"Everything's gonna be alright..."


Feel free to come up with your own version and share, I know you are very creative. We need fun in here.

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Electro DGX
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posted December 14, 2016 02:01 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Electro DGX     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by hypatia238:
You and I both girl, Pluto and Mars ruling your chart with Sun ruling your 10H can do that but I keep it in check at work bc having a pleasant work environment is very important to me (saturn conjuncting my pluto and venus conjuncting my mars help with this), I like to get along with my team. I hate been micro managed or controlled or feeling my talents or mind are not been appreciated, I need supervisors that build me up, see my value and that trust me and don't micromanage me or I will leave sooner than later.


Agreed. I loathe the feeling of being looked down upon and being controlled.

------------------
Scorpio Ascendant
Aquarius Sun in 4th
Gemini Moon in 8th
Check out my blog ya'll: www.electrodgxtalks.wordpress.com

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hypatia238
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posted December 14, 2016 02:03 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for hypatia238     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Electro DGX:
Agreed. I loathe the feeling of being looked down upon and being controlled.


Yeah I wanted to comment on your thread about Leo on the 10H the other day bc I know were you are coming from..

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Electro DGX
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posted December 14, 2016 02:16 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Electro DGX     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by hypatia238:
Yeah I wanted to comment on your thread about Leo on the 10H the other day bc I know were you are coming from..

Yeah, just give me the attention I deserve...

I also have my NN in the 10th, so it most likely makes it more difficult for me to deal with since that is supposed to be where I should be heading. Having so many Aquarius planets in the 4th however though makes achieving it so much more difficult for me.

------------------
Scorpio Ascendant
Aquarius Sun in 4th
Gemini Moon in 8th
Check out my blog ya'll: www.electrodgxtalks.wordpress.com

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teasel
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posted December 14, 2016 02:17 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for teasel     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
quote:
Originally posted by CosmicPhuz:

Watch it, you don't wanna exceed your arguing quota for the day



Aries doesn't have a quota.

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